15
"What did you say?" Matthew said, staring at her.
She balled her fists and stared at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. "I said you're doing this for yourself, not for me! I'm not having this baby because you made a stupid mistake. I will do what I want and I—don't—care—what you think!"
"Kat, let's be rational…"
"Yes! Let's be rational, you first."
"Kat!"
"Shut up and leave me alone. We are done for."
"Are you… b-breaking up with me?"
"Yes, yes I am actually. And I don't regret a second of it."
She started up to her house.
"I love you, though," Matthew said.
She stopped, in the middle of the driveway.
"I do," Matthew insisted, moving closer to her. "If… If it's for the best, then leave, but hear me out first. I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything, for getting you pregnant, for leaving, for everything. I really do love you, Kat, you're my number one, my heart, my sun, my soul…" He pulled her into a hug and she didn't reject him. She twisted around and buried her face in his chest, gripping his back.
"I know, I love you too, so much," Kat mumbled, "I don't want to break up, but I can't go with you, it wouldn't do anything for either of us."
"I wanted to go because I wanted to have you along. I was—am—afraid of losing you because of how much you mean to me. And I'm not saying that like a teenager, I'm saying that like a human being. I love you, Kat."
She pulled away from him and got on her toes, placing a kiss on his lips. "Good-bye, Matthew."
"Why…? I could stay."
"But you don't want to."
Matthew pulled her back into a hug and she allowed him to cry on her shoulder, not caring that she was in the middle of the street and that her parents could see her. They would see her shape soon, anyway, and her cover would be blown. She planned on telling them that night, anyway.
"I don't, Kat, I really don't. I want to get out, I want to run away and never come back. I don't know why, I'm just afraid of what I would face… Aren't you going to tell me to stay here? Maybe things will get better and all that?"
"But if you stayed you'd regret it forever, you'd always look back on this moment and wish you could change it, that you ran away."
Matthew realized the truth and it hurt, it really did. He acquiesced with a nod.
"Did Alfred come back?" She asked quietly.
"Yeah, he's probably killing someone right now. Jail time didn't do any good."
"What do you dream about, Matthew?"
Matthew closed his eyes and pulled out memories, drawing them before him like tarot cards.
"I dream of escapes, something bigger than I can imagine."
"Well, go on, Matthew. I will always love you." Katrina felt a hard lump form in her throat and she tried to swallow it, but couldn't. Instead she gave him a sorrowful look she hoped described her message clearly. He nodded.
"I'll write, okay, every single day."
"Please do," he voice was hoarse and choppy.
He kissed her forehead and squeezed her hand one final time.