Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. I do, however, own this storyline, my OCs, and a new guinea pig named Caramel.
A/N: Sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out. Contrary to popular belief, I actually do have a life outside fan fiction, and lately it's been kicking my butt. Theme song this chapter is Lean on Me by Bill Whithers. CONGRATS KRIS! Mad Love to Readingtime. Love you hard core, bb.
We are down to the last six chapters after this, not counting the epilogues! To thank you for all your continued support, I'm going to take a page from my girl DefinitelyStaying's book. For every thousand mark I hit, starting with 7,000, I will do an outtake of your choosing. Tell me in your reviews what you want to see and then I'll put a poll up. Want to see Alice/Adrian's first time? A certain chapter from one of the girls' POV? I've even had a request for an Adrian/Jasper lemon (I might have to get Trish to help me with that one!) I feed your addiction to fiction...thank you for feeding my addiction to reviews!
Edward's POV
The next morning, Bella was especially quiet, gnawing on her Frosted Brown Sugar and Cinnamon Pop-Tart in deep thought. I warmed up her barely touched coffee and leaned on my elbows on the counter. There would once have been a day when I would have lectured her on the lack of nutritional benefits to her breakfast, but I have since learned to let her make her own decisions. Hopefully she will be changed soon anyway and it will be irrelevant.
"What's on your mind, love?" Bella's brows bunched up for a moment while she considered my question, then smoothed themselves out just as quickly.
"I'm worried about Jasper," she stated without elaborating.
"I am, too. I've noticed that, with the exception of last night and the other day when you were playing Frisbee, you haven't spent much time around him lately. Why is that?"
"I thought that giving him space was the right thing to do. I don't want to do anything to make this any harder on him."
"I understand, but did it occur to you that keeping your distance might be part of the reason why he's having a hard time right now? He hasn't only lost the woman he loves, he lost his best friend. I can't imagine how much harder it would have been for me those long, torturous months without you if you hadn't made such a point to keep me included in your life, even as just a friend."
"Yes, I did make a point to keep you in my life, and what happened? I led you on and hurt Jasper in the process. I don't want to make the same mistakes twice." Bella's face was contorted with determination, but her eyes held a sadness that I didn't ever want to see on her face again.
"I understand where you're coming from, but Bella, you don't want to go from one extreme to the other, either. By all means, make sure you don't lead him on. But it's okay to be his friend, Bella. Right now he's all alone. Who does he have to talk to? You're here with me, Adrian is living in the dorms and Alice spends most of her time with him. Emmett's here now, which is good, but he's not staying that long. Heidi and Felix have become surprising friends, but they are still Volturi and there is a necessary wall between us and them that can't be crossed. He is trying to move on, but the bottom line is he misses you. I'm sure you miss him, too, and I don't want you to resent me down the road for losing that friendship on my account. I think it would help him get over you if he knew he hadn't lost you entirely, and it would be good for the three of us to all try and get past the awkwardness we're feeling right now. He is for all intents and purposes my brother. We can't avoid him for all eternity, you know."
Bella's eyes softened a bit, but she still looked hesitant. "Are you sure? I mean, I didn't realize that I was leading you on, but I was. The last thing I want to do is hurt him or you any more than I already have."
I walked beside her and stood next to her barstool, settling myself between her legs and taking her face in my hands. "Bella, my love. You said that even when you were in love with him, your feelings for me never died, never faded. Is the reverse now true? Are you still in love with Jasper?"
Bella shook her head. "No."
"Well, that's the difference, isn't it? I know that you're mine just as I'm yours. You know it, too. You won't lead him on."
"But I do love him, Edward. He will always have a special place in my heart. Are you really okay with me being his friend, staying close to him?"
I surprised myself as much as her with the sincerity of my response. "I am. You can be friends with Jasper without fear of me getting jealous."
Bella rewarded me with a huge smile before wrapping her arms around my neck, grabbing fistfuls of hair and pulling me to her for a breathtaking kiss.
Jasper's POV
The day after the Halloween Party from Hell, I decided to go hunting with Heidi. She wanted to talk to me, and I dreaded the conversation. Whatever it was she wanted to say, it couldn't be good.
After we'd both gotten our fill of deer, we decided to go sit in our usual spot to talk. I noticed she didn't grimace at the taste and hadn't spilled a drop this time. She was getting the hang of it. I was happy for her, she seemed very proud of herself. I was proud of her, too.
"So…about last night," Heidi began, then trailed off, not knowing quite what to say.
"What did Felix say?" I asked, not sure how to broach the subject. I mean, it wasn't like I could come out and ask her if I'd let the cat out of the bag in my grief.
"He was more concerned with his slip-up in front of Kelly than about the details of your personal life. I think his exact words were 'Of course he has a thing for Bella. We all do.' I, on the other hand, am not so easily fooled, Jasper. There is more going on than you're telling me."
Shit. I frantically tried to think of something while still maintaining a calm expression on my face. "I…"
"Stop right there. I don't want to know. I have a sneaking suspicion that things are better off all over if I don't know." I turned to look at her, and although I could not confirm nor deny her suspicions, I wanted her to see in my eyes that I was thankful. She nodded ever so slightly, but had a scowl on her face.
"We've been called back to Italy," she explained quietly. "As soon as the quarter is over, we have to go back, just for Christmas break, for an 'on hand' update. We should be back before school starts again. Or at least, that's what they're saying now. Only the goddesses know what they'll say after Aro has gotten his update." Suddenly my silent thank you seemed like a bad idea. Aro would see it. I was beginning to wonder just how much more I could possibly screw this up, although I couldn't find it in my heart to regret dancing with Bella last night. Just feeling her in my arms relaxed me in a way I hadn't felt since she moved in with Edward. It gave me hope for us.
Then another thought hit me. Felix and Heidi were going to be gone over Christmas break. Alice, Adrian, Edward, and Bella will all be gone, too. I would have asked to come along, citing the ruse as my excuse, but I didn't want to make things harder, for them or for me. Besides, after last night I doubted Adrian would want to talk to me again for a while. I was surprised Edward handled everything as well as he did. Somehow he'd managed to save all our asses one at a time.
Either way, I wasn't going to England. That meant that unless I could talk Emmett into staying longer than he'd planned, I was going to be all alone for two weeks. Before Bella, that wouldn't have bothered me so much. Alice and Rosalie used to take extended shopping trips together, and I would often take the opportunity to venture out on my own somewhere, free from humans and invading emotions of any kind. But now, the thought put a pit in my stomach. As much as I missed Bella, she was still here, still near me. I still got to see her every day, talk to her almost every day. Touch her once in a while, even if just platonically. And when I couldn't be with her, I had Heidi's friendship to distract me and make me smile. Solitude was the last thing I wanted right now.
Plus, I was going to be worried out of my mind. How could I keep Bella safe from the wrong side of an ocean? And I was terrified of what would happen to Heidi and Felix on their return to the Volturi, especially after last night's debacle.
The rest of the week was… interesting. Kelly was avoiding Felix even more than before, and it was only after I had assured him no fewer than half a dozen times that she wasn't afraid of him did he calm down and return to his regular cocky self. In History, the only class I had with Heidi, Felix, and Kelly, I had to contain my snickers when Felix began passing Kelly notes. Kelly's emotions flitted from annoyed to angry to frustrated to aroused. I glanced at Heidi and pretended to fan myself, shifting my eyes towards them and back. She laughed so loud the teacher cleared his throat in warning.
Emmett came with us to most of our lecture classes where he could sneak in without the professors noticing, having a ball causing a ruckus and then showing the teacher up by proving that he knew more than they did. It was just the comic relief we all needed. Almost made up for the 'I'm staying at your place cuz I don't want to hear Edward and Bella doin' the wild thing' remark, which was, of course, immediately followed with a 'sorry, bro' that didn't really soften the blow much.
Bella was making a point to pay more attention to me. I could see the worried look in her eyes when she looked at me, even if she was hiding her emotions. She would send me text messages throughout the day, even called me a couple of times 'just to say hi.' I wasn't sure what to make of it. Before I could think too much about it, my phone started singing 'We've Got Tonight.'
"Bella." Her name never came out normal anymore; it always came out like a sigh, a relaxing breath.
"Hey, Jasper. How you doin'?" Miserable. Wretched. Depressed as hell that you're not here in my arms where you belong…
"I'm fine, darlin'." Much better now. "Is there a particular reason you called?"
"No, I just wanted to say hi." There's that phrase again. I just want to say I love you. Would that be okay?
"Hi!" I teased. "Are you looking forward to your dad coming tomorrow?"
"Would it be terrible of me to say no? In all honesty, I'm a nervous wreck about it. I never told him about moving in with Edward."
"Why not?" Once more I felt something I should know better than feel by now. Hope.
"In the beginning, I thought that maybe this whole mess would be done and over with before he visited, and things would be back to normal and he would never need to know." She paused, and I knew she was thinking the same thing I was. That was before it changed. Before she realized she was still in love with Edward. "But now…" Her voice trailed off.
"But now things are different, and even if they were gone, you might still be there," I whispered.
"Yeah," she said, sounding suddenly awkward and uncomfortable with the conversation. I could kick myself for doing that to her. Here she was, opening up to me, turning to me about a problem. I should be jumping for joy, not reminding her about things I'd rather she not think about in the first place.
"Well, if you want, you could move back here, just for the weekend. We could find some way to distract Heidi and Felix, maybe sic Emmett on them, or have Alice take them shopping out of state. You could avoid the whole thing, and your dad would never need to know." I knew my idea was self-serving, but I didn't care. It upset me, though, to think that what started out as her pretending to be with Edward had morphed into us having a conversation where I'm suggesting she pretend to still be with me. I tried to shake it off. She still loves me; she's said so. She loves us both. That means there is still a shred of hope for me.
"I don't think that would be a good idea, Jasper. It would be much too risky. Besides, I hate lying to Charlie, and I need to tell him sooner or later anyway." I could tell it was bothering her to talk about this. She didn't want me to hurt, but there was no way to stop the hurt short of her being back in my arms for good.
Then I heard Edward's voice in the background. "Ask Jasper if he wants to come over and watch a movie or something, love. Alice said she and Heidi were going hunting together since Felix has someone at their house again, although I'm not sure if she meant hunting for food or for Dolce and Gabbana. Either way, let him know he's welcome to come over here if he wants." I don't know why it bothered me so much. He was trying to be nice, I could see that. He didn't even growl at my suggestion. But still I felt betrayed. What I had interpreted as a private, intimate conversation between Bella and I was actually something totally different. To her, it was just a casual conversation she had no problem having in front of Edward. I seethed with jealousy.
"Did you hear that?" she asked pleasantly, no hint of stress in her voice.
"Yeah, I heard. Thanks, but no." Did she really think I was going to go over there, watch 'The Princess Bride' with them, smell all kinds of scents I'd rather never inhale at his house, and be happy about it?
"Why not?" she asked, this time sounding a little hurt.
"Because, Bella, although I appreciate what you're trying to do, the less time I have to spend watching you cuddle up with Loverboy, the better off my life will be." My tone was cutting and I immediately regretted it.
Silence.
Shit.
Then Edward came on the line. "Jasper, I don't think that was necessary, do you?" His voice was calmer than I would have expected.
"No, I suppose not."
"She cares about you, very much, and she's worried about how you're dealing with everything. She's trying to be your friend, the way you promised you would be for her." His brotherly pep talk was just pissing me off even more.
"Tell her I'm sorry." I hung up the phone before he could say anything else.
Edward's POV
Bella was distraught after her conversation with Jasper. After he bit her head off, she just stared at the phone, not knowing what to do or say. After a few moments, I took the phone out of her hand and tried talking some sense into him. I didn't think it worked, but sure enough a few minutes later there was a knock at the door.
Jasper was standing there holding a bag of popcorn in one hand and a container of Chunky Monkey ice cream in the other. He looked like he'd lost a fight – his clothes were wrinkled, his shirt was half untucked, his hair was in more disarray than mine. I looked over his shoulder to see a smug Emmett standing behind him, in similar shape. Bella smiled at Jasper's peace offering as she took the food from his hands. She gave him a kiss on the cheek to thank him, and I tried to ignore his mental debate on whether or not to turn into the kiss.
"For you, Bella. But we're not watching 'The Princess Bride,'" he teased. I rolled my eyes at him. So did Bella. Emmett smacked him in the back of the head, and then pushed Jasper across the threshold into the house so he could scoop up Bella in their usual bear hug greeting with her cute little bare feet dangling. I couldn't help but tickle them as I walked by. She squealed in delight.
We ended up on the couch, Jasper on one end, me on the other, with Bella in the middle wearing her flannel pajamas and fuzzy slippers. Emmett sprawled out on the other couch. Bella was in the mood for a classic, so we put in 'To Catch a Thief.' She fell asleep half way through the movie, her head in my lap, her legs curled up against her chest in an awkward position. In a move he didn't really contemplate before acting, Jasper took off Bella's slippers and dropped them to the floor, pulling her legs out into a more comfortable position. Bella sighed in her sleep, a half smile gracing her features as she wrapped her arms around my thigh. With her legs now draped across Jasper's lap, he began massaging her feet. I just stared at him incredulously.
"What?!" he asked in a half whisper/half hiss. "You don't need to be an empath to see she was uncomfortable. Plus, she's radiating stress. I felt it as soon as she fell asleep and quit blocking me. I reckon since I'm the one causing the tension, I ought to work some of it out for her." He turned his attention back to Bella's feet, singing Garth Brooks songs in his head. Clearly, he wasn't going to take no for an answer. I was considering whether or not it was important enough to me to make an issue out of when Emmett the Wise decided it was time for a distraction.
"What exactly is it about cat burglars that everyone finds so hot?"
"Maybe it's the thrill of the chase," Jasper mused.
"I think perhaps it's the intellectual side of it. They're not common thieves, they appreciate fine art and beautiful things. They have to research, plan for contingencies. It's almost an art form in itself." Both Jasper and Emmett rolled their eyes at me.
"Nah," Emmett replied. "It's the tight leather outfits." We all laughed, and just like that, the tension was broken and we were brothers again. We played video games for a couple of hours until Bella started to toss and turn, kicking Jasper square between his legs when she attempted to roll over. It was hard enough that there was a loud smacking noise from the bone of her heel hitting marble. I was unsuccessfully trying to hold in my amusement while Emmett hit the floor laughing. "Serves you right! Put her feet there -- get kicked in the nuts!"
Jasper got up and with all the dignity he had left, did his best South Park impersonation. "Screw you guys – I'm going home!" Emmett decided to follow after him, giving me just enough time to grab a quick shower before it was time to wake Bella up to get ready to go to the airport.
The caffeine from Bella's coffee finally kicked in about halfway to the airport.
"Sorry about last night. I didn't realize how tired I was. Did everyone play nice after I passed out?"
I chuckled at her. "Yes, we played video games and goofed around until it was time for me to get cleaned up. Although I dare say that if Jasper were human, he'd be walking funny today thanks to you." Bella looked at me clueless. She couldn't stop herself from giggling as I told her the story of the foot rub and her swift kick.
"What do you think my dad is going to say when he sees us together again?" Bella asked, chewing furiously on her lower lip.
"Well, there's only one way to find out," I replied as I parked the car. After helping her out of her seat, I took her hand and we went in to face Charlie together. We waited outside the security gate for only a few minutes before we saw him. Bella let go of my hand and ran to him. He dropped his carry-on bag and hugged her tight. I think it was the first time I'd ever seen any sort of public display of affection between the two of them. It was sweet. I held back, giving them their moment, until I saw them separate before walking up to them. I put one hand on the small of Bella's back for emotional support, and extended my other towards Charlie. He shook it, but was looking at Bella when he spoke.
"Jasper couldn't make it?" he asked.
"Um…let's get your luggage, Dad. I'll explain in the car." Charlie looked at me then, one eyebrow raised suspiciously at me. Between me being there to pick him up and Bella calling him Dad, his instincts were on high alert.
"I don't have any luggage, Bells. I'm only staying two nights; got everything I need right here." He patted his carry-on bag with pride. I hoped for his sake that Alice hadn't seen that. He'd be returning home with a seven piece luggage set, already packed with new clothes.
"Great, then let's get going," I suggested. "If we hurry, you might have time to settle in and take a nap before the game."
Charlie's thoughts showed my attempts at being polite were just serving to make him more wary. He kept having flashbacks of the time after I had left Bella in the woods. I was certain he would never completely forgive me for that. I didn't blame him.
Bella took the backseat, leaving the front for Charlie, but he chose to sit in the back with her instead, wanting to be close to his daughter every minute he could. I made a mental note to offer to switch seats with him at the football game so he could sit with Bella. I would have no problem sitting in the family section with Emmett for the game. He was appraising her intensely, she had gained a little weight, he'd noticed, and considered it a good thing. He thought she looked more beautiful than ever. But mostly he was wondering what the hell is going on?
"Jasper and I broke up, Charlie. I realized some things when I moved here and decided I needed to spend some time alone, to figure out some things for myself, which I did. And what I figured out was that, although I care very much for Jasper and am so grateful to him for all the ways he has touched and improved my life, I am still in love with Edward. And he's still in love with me. I moved in with him, and we are very happy together. Please be happy for me, Dad. Please?" There was a long, pregnant pause as Charlie considered everything before speaking.
"Well, I guess I always knew deep down that Edward was going to be 'it' for you. I'm not going to say I wasn't hoping you'd moved on, because I was. I don't ever want to see you that hurt again, Bells. But only our true loves can cut us that deep. Believe me, I should know." His thoughts drifted to Renee and his unrequited love for her that he carried with him still, and would until the day he died. "Edward, you got a second chance at love. It's something that only comes around once in a lifetime, if that. Don't waste it, son."
"I won't, sir," I replied reverently, glancing in the rear view mirror to smile at Bella.
"Good. Because anything like that happens to her again, I'm coming after you with a .45 and a shovel, understand?"
Even as a vampire with bulletproof skin, the Chief still made me gulp nervously at his words. "Yes, sir." Charlie turned his attention back to Bella, suddenly noticing my mother's engagement ring on her finger.
"Is there something else you two would like to tell me?"
Bella panicked, looking to me for an answer. "That is a promise ring, Charlie. It was my mother's. I wanted to give Bella a token of my love for her, to show her that I know how precious she is, and that I'm not going to take our love for granted ever again." Charlie reached forward and patted me firmly on the shoulder twice.
"Good job, son. Maybe there's hope for you yet."
We got him settled in the spare bedroom and then headed for the game. Jasper had already traded seats so that he was sitting with Emmett and Charlie could sit between Bella and Alice. My two favorite girls, he thought affectionately as Alice gave him a warm hug. She loved Charlie. We all settled in to watch the biggest game of the year. Charlie seemed proud of the girls' football knowledge as they bragged about the stats they knew about Adrian and all the other players. At halftime, the game was tied 7-7. Bella excused herself to go to the restroom, and Alice followed, mumbling about the one time I leave her to do her own hair.
I saw my opportunity and took it. "Charlie, sir. I need to talk to you about something while the girls are away. I don't know if Bella told you or not, but the four of us are going to England for the Christmas holiday. Adrian has planned a surprise wedding for Alice while we are there. Carlisle and Esme aren't able to attend due to his responsibilities at the hospital. Adrian has always felt close to you, and knows how much Alice loves you, too. He wanted me to ask you if you would come with us and give Alice away." There were other reasons as well, but I couldn't mention those. "He would take care of the plane ticket, of course, and this way you could spend Christmas with Bella."
"Tell Adrian that I'd be honored, Edward." Charlie and I spent a few more moments hammering out the details before I heard the girls approaching and swiftly changed the subject.
When Adrian came back on the field, his eyes searched out mine and I gave him a thumbs up signal. He smiled like a kid at a candy shoppe. The second half was as hard fought as the first half, but with less than two minutes to go, Adrian performed a brilliant quarterback sneak to win the game 14-7, cinching up the Big Ten Championship and securing the Buckeyes a spot in the National Championship game, to be played a week after we returned from England.
The rest of the weekend was pleasant and uneventful, and Charlie even hugged me when we dropped him and Emmett off at the airport. As a matter of fact, the rest of the quarter passed by quicker than I could have imagined. Felix had finally convinced Kelly to go out with him, and although she was steadfastly refusing to sleep with him, I could tell by their thoughts and actions that they were slowly falling in love. She continued to have doubts that he was human, although the idea that he could be anything else was ludicrous to her. She still planned on doing some research online once she got home, to set her mind at ease. That was a problem to be dealt with on another day, however.
Heidi and Jasper were closer friends than ever now that they both understood the pull they felt towards one another. Heidi had her suspicions about Jasper's relationship with Alice and his relationship with Bella, but she pointedly remained silent. As far as she was concerned, it was a 'don't ask, don't tell' situation in her book, and she figured it was better off remaining that way. I didn't disagree.
I took Heidi, Felix, Alice and Bella to the airport the morning of our trip. Even though it was only going to be 15 hours before I saw Bella again, I clung to her desperately, kissing her all over her face and hugging her tight. Alice, thinking that it was because I wasn't going to see her for two weeks, held back as long as she could before dragging Bella through the security gates. After they were safely gone, I turned back to say my farewells to Heidi and Felix. Neither of them were anxious to go, knowing Caius would not be pleased with them. I felt confident, however, that we had done a well enough job with our ruse to ensure their safety. They just had to deal with explaining why they had both chosen our diet, as neither of them could bring themselves to revert to their old ways just to change the color of their eyes. Aro would know the truth regardless.
"If you get done with your update quick enough, why don't you join us in Haworth?" I assumed they would be forced to do surveillance while we were there, anyway. Might as well give them an invitation. I just hoped that they wouldn't show up until after the wedding so we could get Alice and Adrian safely off on their honeymoon first.
"Ah, thank you for the offer, Edward, but I have already promised Kelly that I would visit her in Texas if I got back from 'visiting my family' before school starts again." Felix thought back to the sweet, chaste kiss she'd given him when he left her dorm that morning. Even though he'd still not gotten any further than first base, Kelly had asked him to stay the night. I never thought lying still for eight hours with a fully clothed human wrapped around me would be so enjoyable, he reminisced. I knew exactly what he meant. The only thing better was lying still for eight hours with a beautiful, naked woman wrapped around you. Or better yet, spending eight hours in bed with your beautiful, naked lover and not wasting one moment lying still. I needed to stop that train of thought. Otherwise, it was going to be a very long and uncomfortable flight.
"You've got it bad, my old friend," Heidi admonished him, even while her own thoughts drifted to Jasper and her fears about him being alone in his current state of mind. Felix started to pretend to be affront to the idea, but quickly gave in.
"Yes, I suppose I do," he said with a sigh, shrugging his shoulders. In truth, between Kelly and the freedom and friendships he had found here, he was happier than he'd ever been.
I hugged them both goodbye and then returned to the parking lot to meet Adrian, who had our luggage. He handed me several garment bags as soon as I got there. He was more nervous than I'd ever seen him. Not over the flight, but over the twilight wedding planned for tomorrow evening.
"Well, here goes nothing!" He exclaimed, channeling his football persona for courage. "Game on!"
A/N: The Naked Cullen Boys are making their way to Kingston, England. I only have one unclaimed spot left on the tour -- lemme know where they should go!