A/N: Updated as of 1/19/2014.
Disclaimer: The Harry Potter world and a majority of the characters in this fanfiction are the work of JK Rowling. The story line of both The Order of Chaos and it's sequel the Chaos of Life belong to me. Original characters such as Cara Connors and Mary Diven are loosely based on real people who I decided to throw into the Wizarding World ;)
Y6: A Hand To Hold
He entered the Great Hall as dinner came to a close with a pounding head ache. By the time he got back to Hogsmeade and his brother revived him from his unconscious state, every one oddly disappeared. Regulus had headed straight to the castle whereas Sirius took his time. He slugged down the Gryffindor table rubbing his eyes trying to rid himself of his dizzy feeling. When he pulled them away, he was surprised to find he was standing where he and the others typically sat; but it was oddly bare. When he glanced around the Hall, he found that every eye was on him.
"Mr. Black," Professor McGonagall came rushing to him, "follow me."
He nodded and she held him by the elbow as they left the Hall. McGonagall looked unlike herself. Where she was typically glaring in annoyance, she was sadden with grief and worry.
"On Professor Dumbledore's orders, you are to report to St. Mungo's Hospital," she frowned, "do you have any problems with Apparating alongside me?"
Though confused, he shook his head no. So she grabbed him by the arm and dragged him down the parth back to Hogsmeade at a rapid pace.
"Can you tell me what is going on Professor?" Sirius asked her.
She bit her cheek walking too fast for him to keep up, "I'm afraid you will have to wait. My orders were to take you there. I am unsure whether Professor Dumbledore would permit me telling you before he has the chance to."
Seconds later they came across the gates of Hogwarts and into Hogsmeade they went. Without warning McGonagall grabbed Sirius by the arm; he was again plunged through a dark, suffocating space. When his feet hit solid ground, his head rolled around as his dizziness struck him mildly. He shook his head as he followed McGonagall out of the lobby area and down a few corridors.
Mungo's? Who was here? Prongs? Mooney? Wormy? Were they hurt? Is it my father? Did something happen to him after we left?
They turned a corner and he found his fellow sixth year Gryffindors sitting in chairs haphazardly set in the middle of the corridor. Marls and Mary were crying; Lily, Emmeline, and Dori were red eyed and puffy but no tears fell. James, Remus, and Peter all looked deflated as they glared at their hands.
His feet echoed and Remus stood as the others just looked up.
"Pads," Remus took him in a hug.
"I don't understand," he said pulling away, "what's wrong? Why are we here?"
Remus looked at McGonagall confused, "It's Cara, of course."
"What do you—," He looked around and then at the door of the closest room, "You don't mean—is she in there? Is she okay?"
Sirius ran up to the window to see Dumbledore patting a girl's head. This girl was gray and thin though resembled his friend. She was smiling as she whispered to Dumbledore.
"I'm going to talk to the Professor," Minerva said as she walked in to the hospital room.
She went up to Dumbledore and whispered in his ear gesturing to the door. He looked through the window and met eyes with Sirius. He whispered back to Minerva. And she came back out.
"Sirius, he would like you to enter."
"What about us?" Lily said standing.
"Only Sirius," Minerva sighed.
"But—" Lily began to protest.
"She asked for him, Miss Evans," she said authoritatively. Lily sat down and Sirius stepped forward.
Minerva guided him in to the room. His hands and feet and heart felt heavier with every step. She looked worse close up.
"Sirius," she smiled at Dumbledore, "Sirius."
"He's here," Minerva said.
Cara's head turned to Minerva smiling then to Sirius. She looked blankly at him taking in his dark features; his pale skin, his long black hair, and those eyes. Those grey eyes. She'd seen eyes like that before.
"NO! SIRIUS!" she screamed and jumped to the floor curling into a ball crying out, SIRIUS! SIRIUS! SIRIUS! PLEASE STOP! SIRIUS!"
Sirius jumped back as Dumbledore lunged for her.
"Cara," Dumbledore whispered, "Cara, please, it is okay. This is Sirius. He is your friend."
"NO! PLEASE STOP! SIRIUS! OW OW!" she cried again and again.
"Take him out Minerva," Dumbledore bellowed.
Minerva quickly grabbed him and pulled him away though he tried to retaliate. His head watched as Cara cried his name with fright. What happened to her? What have I done? Please, Cara, please…
He was put out the door with the others as Minerva ran back in to help Cara. They all stared at Cara through the window and at Sirius at their side. What had he done? Sirius only looked at Cara touching his hand to the window. Dumbledore ordered Minerva away and she came running back out.
"I have to take you all back to school now."
They all protested except Sirius who stared through the glass.
"Please, please, she's unwell! And it's getting late!" Minerva yelled over top, "Please everyone, I want to only have to make one trip. Hold on to each other. Miss Evans and Mr. Potter, give me your hands."
Everyone linked up and James and Lily held on to Minerva. The floor left them and a new one appeared. They all landed with a startle but Sirius still looked out as if he had Cara's window still out in front of him. He reached out but the glass was gone, instead they stood in the streets of Hogsmeade.
"Off to the castle," Minerva ushered them up as kindly as she could.
They walked in a deathly silence. Mary, Dori, and Lily were walking closely together needing to feel the others. Marlene was leading the group with James and Remus. They were spread feet apart all trapped with their own thoughts. Emmeline was running over the entire day in her mind; it had been so nice, and it felt like it should've gotten better but why did she feel so hurt? Peter walked somewhere in the middle. He held himself confused and scared. He had never seen someone look so terrible; especially some he knew. And Sirius lagged at the back. He felt nauseous and confused and frustrated and hurt and happy, so happy because she was alive.
"To bed," McGonagall ordered them when they got to the Castle.
The Gryffindors were silent as they walked down the corridor. Suddenly, Dori faltered and burst in to tears. Lily who was closest to her took her into hug letting her cry on her shoulder. James watched as it happened and as he passed he put a hand on Lily's shoulder for only a moment. His warmth was a comfort as she tried to stay composed herself. But strength is not found in composure.
When he took his hand away and continued up to the tower, Lily turned to watch him as he went. Everyone walked at their own pace, in their own sorrow. Every few seconds, James coughed down a sob. Sirius, however, was in a complete daze. He couldn't comprehend that Cara was back, he couldn't comprehend that the body on the bed was hers, he couldn't understand why he had been brought to see her, but above all he couldn't comprehend why she had been so frightened of him.
When they got to the Common Room, many people were still up. One by one, the Sixth Years trickled from outside the corridors to a sprint up to their dormitories. People knocked on their doors to find out what happened, but they wouldn't open up. Eventually they were all left alone.
Lily lay in her bed listening to the girls cry. She heaved and heaved but kept it down. She ran out of the room unable to bear it.
James couldn't take the silence. If they had been sobbing, they must've cast a silencing charm. But not hearing their pain, only made his feel worse. He was trapped inside his thoughts. He slowly crept out and down to the Common Room.
As he tip toed down the stairs, he saw a red haired girl curled up in a chair. He hesitated but continued down. She looked up and burst in to tears tucking her face in to her knees with her arms enclosing her. As James watched her cry, his heart fell harder. But at least she felt the pain. He sat on the floor with his back leaning on her chair. He tilted his head back against her shins and tears fell down his cheeks. He tried to cough away the sobs but eventually he just let them sound.
His touch was like a comfort; it told her she could show her pain. It told her that it was okay to cry because he was right there crying with her. It told her that he wasn't that boy she once knew, deep in his heart he was a good person who could love and cry as much as he could hate and retaliate.
They discovered bravery that night. Bravery wasn't holding back so you could look strong. It was letting everyone see your vulnerability to show how strong you truly are.
Her head fell to the arm chair and he lay on the floor. They continued crying in those positions but eventually sleep took over and they didn't protest. This was the beginning of James and Lily.