Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. I do own my storyline, my OCs, and a wicked sunburn.

A/N: We've got our first outtake! So far it's looking like E/B in public, down and dirty. Don't forget to vote on the poll! Speaking of voting -- A Lesson in Release has been nominated for Best Non Canon Couple in the Sparkle Awards!

Thanks to ForksVampireGirl and Nikkie 3219 for going back and making sure they reviewed every chapter. This one is for readingtime, jilburfm, and changedbyEdward -- all of whom made sure this didn't suck. Don't know what I'd do without you girls.

Theme song for this chapter is Hallelujah. Pick your favorite version...Jeff Buckley, Allison Crowe, Bon Jovi, k.d. lang. My favorite version, and the one I had on repeat while writing this, is the Rufus Wainwright version. The song Jasper is listening to at the beginning is "What She's Doin' Now" by Garth Brooks.

Jasper's POV

What she's doin' now is tearin' me apart
Fillin' up my mind and emptyin' my heart
I can hear her call each time the cold wind blows
And I wonder if she knows...what she's doin' now

Why the hell do I listen to country music again? So I can rub salt into my own wounds? I threw the iPod against the wall, watching it break into millions of satisfying pieces of rubble. I briefly wondered what else I could break.

Bella probably has no idea what she's doing now. She has no idea that she's driving me insane, wondering where she is, what she's doing. Is she safe? Does she miss me the way I miss her? She is completely clueless to how much pain I'm in, I'm sure. Alice is probably dragging her from store to store until Bella can barely remember her own name, let alone mine.

She loves me. I keep telling myself that, because it's the only thing I have left. I made mistakes, I know I did, and Edward was right there to pick up the pieces and fill her mind with doubt. I don't think he did it intentionally. I never sensed any malice from him. Then again, he'd become an expert at blocking me, so who the hell knows. He was fighting for the woman he loved. I was the one stupid enough to think I didn't need to fight for her. His mistakes were monumental compared to mine. She's always forgiven people too easily, but I really didn't think she'd ever completely forgive him for the things he'd done. I was so sure she was mine forever.

Alice tried to tell me when Bella went with Edward to Buffalo that I needed to fight fire with fire, but I didn't want Bella to feel like some prize to be won. I didn't think she wanted me to, even though it killed me to know, in my gut, what was happening. Just like now. I thought I'd made the right decision, because when she came back, she chose me.

Even when she did choose me, though, there was still Edward. She let him take her to their meadow, spend the night in her room. Alice wouldn't tell me exactly what she'd seen in her vision. But I'd felt Bella's love for him before they left, just as surely as I felt her love for me. I knew that even if she chose me, I wasn't getting all of her. I had convinced myself the rest would come with time. And I thought it had, despite the fact that Edward was still there.

He drove her to school, called her on the phone. If I was hunting, she was with Edward. She never pushed him away when he hugged her. She was so worried about hurting his feelings, upsetting him. She accepted that necklace, the one he said was 'to remind her.' I felt his love for her, pure and intense. He was still fighting for her. I'm sure it pleased him to no end that she never took it off. I would hide it in her hair or behind her back when we made love so I didn't have to see it.

All of his efforts to change -- that was him fighting for her, too. Not backing up Alice when she wanted to play Bella Barbie, for example. Why was it that I had been defending her for months with Alice, and she was grateful, but her reaction wasn't nearly as enthusiastic as it was at that moment?

Even with my mounting fears about Edward, though, Bella made sure to remind me that it was me that she loved. I thought with a smile to the day we took the motorcycle to the park after I'd gotten jealous of Edward catching Bella's fall.

"Just reminding you that I'm yours…" she purred as she ran a finger down the seam of my pants over my bulging erection and back up. I hit the throttle and the bike sped up. "…and you're mine." She cupped me into her palm and squeezed.

"Oh, darlin'…all yours."

Even after the karaoke night, Bella tried to reassure me.

"Why did you pull Edward outside? You know I hate it when you two fight over me."

"Do you really need to ask? You're my girl. I'd have pulled Daughtry himself into the alley if he sang that song to you," Bella laughed and kissed me again.

"Silly Jasper. I don't care if Elvis Presley came back from the dead to sing Teddy Bear to me, I'd still be your girl…

I didn't fight back. I didn't think I had to. Then she was gone.

Well…I'm fighting back now. I'm going to remind her what we have. I'm going to pull her into my arms and make her see reason. Without a second thought, I got on my laptop and hacked into the airline's system. When I found what I was looking for, I looked at the clock. I had just enough time to get there to meet them at the gate. I quickly bought a ticket to nowhere, just to get past the security gates and grabbed the spare keys to Alice's Porsche. My phone rang a few minutes later, and I checked the Caller I.D. Alice. I hit ignore and then turned the phone off. She can give me a hard time about taking the car later.

Half an hour later, I was standing outside the terminal, waiting anxiously. I tuned out everything but the sounds of the landing planes outside, listening for the one that was pulling up to this section of the tarmac.

While I waited, I focused on what I was going to do, what I was going to say, until their plane finally landed. I heard the muffled voices from inside.

"Bella, love, wake up. We're here."

"Mmm…thank goodness."

"What were you dreaming about, Bella? You sounded sad."

"I was dreaming about…Jasper. What did he say when you told him?" Tell me what???

"Um…I didn't tell him. I wasn't sure…"

"What am I going to say to him?"

"You broke up months ago, Bella. You told him you still loved me. It will hurt him, but he'll understand."

They were in first class, so they would be one of the first ones to come through the door. I could hear them getting closer, could feel them now. They didn't know I was there. They had no reason to hide their emotions. They both were oozing love and devotion. Edward had his arm draped loosely around her shoulder, smiling and looking at each other. Edward's head jerked towards me as he opened the door, either because he heard my thoughts or caught my scent. Bella's eyes followed him and she gasped. Confusion. Regret. Love. Love…for me.

They approached me warily.

"Jasper…" Edward began. Just then, something caused Edward to take his arm off of Bella's shoulder momentarily. I jumped at the chance and grabbed her, pulling her to me. I looked into her eyes, pushing all the love I had for her straight to her heart. Without waiting for a reaction, I bent my head down and kissed her, trying to show her all the things I didn't know how to say. She didn't return the kiss. Instead, she pulled her head away from me and put her hand on my cheek, her eyes begging me for forgiveness.

"Oh, Jasper. I'm so sorry."

"No, sweetheart, don't do this. Please…we were so good together. You know we were! Just give…" My rant was cut short by the sound of Edward groaning as he fell to his knees, his eyes full of terror as they darted between Bella and I. He tried to speak, but he couldn't. He was in agony, and not just about seeing me kiss Bella.

"What a precious reunion, wouldn't you agree, Alec?" The voice was coming from a little girl vampire smiling wickedly just behind Edward.

"Jane…" Bella breathed in horror. I immediately released her and pushed her behind me.

"We knew something was amiss when Heidi and Felix reported back, but we didn't imagine it would be so easy to figure out what. How convenient! We didn't even have to leave the airport."

Edward's pain lowered enough that he was able to stand, but he still seemed unable to speak or take a step toward us. Jane and Alec were flanking him now.

"You don't want to cause a scene, now do you? There are humans about. Just come quietly and maybe Caius will let you live."

I did the only thing I could. I'm sorry, Edward. I sent a huge burst of lethargy to Bella, causing her to pass out and collapse on the floor. I turned and dropped to my knees beside her.

"Oh my God! My wife! Please, somebody help!" At the same time, I pushed concern and compassion out to all the humans in the area. A crowd of travelers swarmed around us, forming a human shield. I held my breath, knowing that I was banking on the fact that Jane and Alec would be under strict orders not to reveal us to the humans. If I was wrong, then I was endangering the lives of everyone here.

"This isn't over," Jane spoke, so only we could hear. I relinquished my hold on the other humans around us and they dissipated, feeling a little confused. I turned to look for Edward, Jane, and Alec, but they were gone. I picked up Bella and headed for the exit. A security guard stopped me as I walked by the gate. I showed him my ticket and explained my wife had low blood sugar and I needed to get her something to eat. A quick burst of trust, and he let us pass.

I kept Bella asleep as I tucked her into the Porsche and took off. I drove and drove and drove, until I finally found an abandoned farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by cornfields.

Bella, forgive me. I can't lose you. They'll be back, they won't let you live.

I broke open the back door and carried her limp body inside. I delicately laid her down on top of a dusty couch covered in a sheet that was once white. The dust swirled around us and caught in the breeze. I pushed her hair back from her beautiful face, kissing her eyelids, her nose, her cheeks. I held her face in my palm, rubbing my thumb across her cheekbone as I bent down and kissed her lips chastely, which parted in a soft sigh. I hoped her dreams were pleasant. They would be her last. I turned her head to the side and kissed the pulse point on her neck, feeling it throb beneath my lips for a moment before piercing her jugular with my teeth.

Ambrosia.

Warmth.

Love.

I pulled back and sealed the wound with my tongue. I kissed her hand before biting her, careful to align my bite with the one from James, so she would have one less scar. I kissed the wrist on her other hand and then bit her, then repeated the same steps on her ankles. All the while I tried to keep her under as deeply and as long as possible. Every moment I was able to keep her asleep was one less moment she was in pain. It didn't work for long.

She shot into an upright position, her pupils dilated, unfocused as she screamed. She began sweating with the burn, pulling and tearing at her sweater, ripping it to shreds.

I tugged its tattered remains over her head and removed her pants as well, leaving her in just her bra and underwear. I carried her upstairs, writhing and screaming, laying her down on the first bed I found. I quickly stripped down to my boxers and laid behind her, turning us on our sides, wrapping my arms and legs around her, trying to keep her as still as possible so I could cool her as best I could. I tried using my powers to relieve her pain, sending her every calming emotion I could muster. She kept shaking her head back and forth, her emotions off the chart. She drifted in and out of consciousness. When she'd warm my body past the point where I could soothe her, I would run an icy cold bath and take her into it with me, chilling us both. Sometimes my efforts seemed to help; sometimes they just seemed to make it worse. I tried running my fingers through her hair and kissing her forehead once, but the fury I felt from her prevented me from doing that again, so I reverted to holding her and using my powers to keep her as subdued as possible.

I had years, decades of experience with newborns, but nothing prepared me for this. I had never bothered trying to comfort them, ease the burn. I would avoid them during the transformation. I didn't want to feel their pain, as I now felt Bella's. It was excruciating. So much more painful than I remembered my own change being. No amount of pain would make me run now, though. I was determined to make this as easy on Bella as possible. I was exhausting myself with the effort, but that wouldn't stop me from trying.

During her moments of rest, I wondered what would happen when she woke up. Would she remember anything? If she didn't, what would I tell her? Would I tell her everything? I had to admit the idea of us disappearing together with a clean slate and a fresh start was appealing, even though I knew deep down it was wrong. Still, I felt certain I could make her happy, make her fall in love with me all over again. It would be fun, starting over from scratch. If I could get over the guilt, that is. And manage to hide from Alice.

I noticed Bella clenching and unclenching her hands into fists, so I forced her fingers open so I could remove her rings before she destroyed them. Wedding rings. Oh my God, that's what she was worried about telling me! She and Edward must have gotten married in England. I noticed there was an engraving on the inside of the band. Never Doubt Never Forget. So that's what it stood for. I put the rings in my jeans pocket for safekeeping.

If she did remember, would she forgive me for taking her away from her husband? For letting Edward be captured in order to save her? Would she understand why I did what I did? What would we do next? If we are going to rescue Edward, we're going to need help. Bella's going to be a newborn. There's no telling what obstacles that is going to create. At least, not until she wakes up.

A/N: The NCBs are heading to Belgium! Hope you enjoy your show, ladies!