Things Kyuubi would never say:

1) MM...chewy cage bars...rawrz.

2) I'm so jealous of Minato's hair =[

3) I totally came to Konoha randomly and was not forcibly via genjutsu told to destroy the entirety of the Leaf Village by some should-be dead has-been Uchiha who wants revenge on his clan and old village...

4) Naruto...you know that explosive diarrhea you had a few months ago? It wasn't your fault...

5) Madara...your hair...is so cute =3

6) Man, I feel like a woman ^^

7) Oh, Minato...the way you sealed half my chakra into your own son so cruelly...was so sexy. O.o

8) I love the faces of the innocent peoplez when I slaughterz them o.e

9) I WILL EAT YOUR SOUL =F

10) Cats scare me...

11) Ow, my tailbone hurts...in nine different places =[

12) Man, this room I'm cooped up in is so small...and why the hell is there water on the ground? I mean, come on, that makes absolutely no sense...I'm inside a twelve-year-old/sixteen-year-old (depending on Shippuuden or just Naruto) and he apparently has stone corridors and a giant jail cell where his gull bladder should be! That can't be good for him...not that I care...heh...heh...

13) Oh yeah, guys, you know you want this...what, who said I was a male? Who? GEEZ.

14) And then I said to Ichibi, "Oh noez, you didn't!" And then Hachibi was, like, "Oh yes, she did!"

15) I tried out for the musical Cats...but they said I wasn't creepy enough.

16) Kyuubi: Yeah, I'm a real FOX. Naruto: You knew it was coming.

17) Cackle cackle. Come to the dark side...we have Naruto! And...apparently...flooded floors...my paws are so wet

18) Purrr.

19) Wow. I have thumbs! Yayz, apposable thumbs :D

20) Madara's my master. We're friends...with benefits...

21) Wow, I have nine tails. That makes absolutely no evolutionary sense. Ha, proof of God! Wait, no, you can't prove the existence of God...(That's right, people on Youtube trying to prove God's existence. You can't. So stop trying, please. And if you choose to believe you should have faith in His existence, and to believe in Him purely by proof is stupid. Sorry for my rant =])

22) Scar from The Lion King is my hero ^^

23) I eat babies.

24) Hey, Itachi, thanks for the nail polish...so pretty...

25) Ugh, it's so small in this wittle cage...and so cold...*shiver shiver* Maybe I should go to EHarmony or ...or maybe JDate...

26) Gimme back that fillet fish, gimme that fish...gimme back that fillet fish, gimme that fish...what if it were you, hanging up on this wall? If it were you in that sandwich you wouldn't be laughing at aaaall!

27) Guess where they got the idea for the FOX channel? That's right, bitch.

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Sorry if it sucked!