Date written: Fri 23 Oct 2009
Author: Starway Man
E-mail: theop at hotkey dot net dot au
Disclaimer: The Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel characters are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar, Kuzui, Fox, WB and UPN; I don't own 'em, and I never will. I also do not own any other characters from any television shows, movies, comics, videogames or literature that I might use. This work is meant merely for enjoyment, and no profit is being made off of it. Some of the text is from various TV episodes or movies or comics or videogames or literature, and so does not belong to me of course.
Rating: Overall R, with mostly PG-13 parts.
Symbols: " " denotes speech, ( italics ) specifies thoughts, and # # indicates phone voice.
Main characters: Xander, ensemble
Warnings: There is some violence, bad language, character death and mention of sexual situations in these stories.
Author Notes: A couple of years ago Night Hunter MGS (a.k.a. Matt) wrote an awesome series of stories called "31 Days of Xanderween" (http://www. fanfiction. net/s/3813208/1/31_Days_of_Xanderween), where he published one Halloween fic for each day of October. I was inspired enough to want to do my own version of the concept, and he has graciously allowed me to use his idea for this series of fanfic stories.
Author Notes 2: Hey, everybody, thanks yet again for all the latest reviews and feedback. The Doctor, thank you in particular for suggesting Bioshock; I'd never heard of it before, but from what I've read it sounds like a terrific game. As for Red X, was that ever proven to be Jason Todd? I honestly don't know. Anyway, onto this story. Basically, this is it for the little theme idea I had where the 'wrong' costume choices are made by the Scooby Gang; after this one, where Xander takes Willow's place as the ghost, it's back to individual story ideas.
Acknowledgments: My thanks of course to Matt for allowing me to dabble with his original idea this way. Also, my deepest gratitude to all my beta readers – Francis Eugene, Greywizard, American Soldier and Nodakskip – for all their help in getting these stories finished on time!
Classification: Alternate Universe, Angst, Crossover, Romance, YAHF
Summary: Thirty-one versions of Halloween, Xander-style. Fic-a-day series.
Title:31 Days of Xanderween Part Deux
***
Story 23: Ghost: Halloween costume switch # 3
Somewhere on the streets of Sunnydale, California
October 31st, 1997
The forces of destiny had screwed up AGAIN, and Xander Harris had dressed up in a white ghost costume for Halloween this year. Willow Rosenberg had decided to go as a soldier, Private Vasquez from the 'Alien' movie franchise. Cordelia Chase had become an 18th century noblewoman, and Buffy Summers had dressed in a leopard-like cat outfit from the store known as Partytown. The convoluted reasons as to how and why this particular chain of events took place were a source of great irritation and annoyance to the higher beings, and they resolved to clean up their Department of Fates and Destinies as soon as possible.
Despite the headache regarding the 'paperwork' that particular act would involve.
Be that as it may, right now Xander had other problems. His body had collapsed in the middle of the street after he'd muttered, "Oh, God, can't breathe...", and at that moment the young man got up out of his body and stared down at it in disbelief.
"What the heck-?" Xander looked down at himself; he was only wearing the clothes he'd had on underneath the ghost outfit. He went to touch his body, but found that his hand simply went straight through the white sheet currently covering it. "Holy shit! I'm a real ghost?!"
The sounds of yelling and screaming quickly distracted Xander from that particular revelation, though. All around him, parents and children were being chased by demons and monsters, and there were a lot of things being thrown around and windows being smashed. It was pure chaos; and thus it was no wonder that far away, the man responsible for the chaos spell, Ethan Rayne, was smiling in pure delight over his handiwork.
Just then Buffy Summers, who was tearing off her black cat's tail and pulling the cat ears she'd worn away from her head, caught up with her best male friend. "Xander! Xander?!" the Chosen One asked in confusion, seeing both the ghost outfit and the ghostly apparition before her.
"Buffy, what the hell's going on?" Xander yelled, ducking as a rock smashed through a car's windows not far away. "Look at me! I just got turned into a real-life chain-rattler here!"
Miss Summers safely scooped up Xander's body. "We gotta get somewhere safe – hey, have you seen Willow?"
Just then, Private Vasquez burst onto the scene. She had just finished beating up some mini-demons who had attacked her on the porch of a house, but luckily she hadn't killed either of the possessed children. Seeing the pair in front of her, the redhead aimed her M41A pulse rifle at Willow's two best friends and growled, "All right, where the hell am I? And who are you two? Start talking, or I'll fill you full of holes!!"
"Willow?" Buffy asked in amazement.
"Willow?" the Xander ghost echoed in similar amazement. He found it astounding how his sweet and shy best friend could be acting so gung-ho and in-charge, and if he'd still been in his body, most likely, it would have turned him on quite a lot.
"Who's Willow?" Vasquez demanded, her aim never wavering one iota. She had no idea what was going on, because the movie character was fairly sure that she had recently died in a big explosion; and yet, here she was, walking around and breathing – just not anywhere she recognized. "My name's Vasquez, private, Colonial Marine Corps. And I won't ask again, who are you two?"
"Uh-oh. I think Willow's been affected by...whatever it is that's going on around here," the young man cogitated helplessly. "What happened to me, it's also happened to her!"
"Uh, Will – err, Private Vasquez? I'm Buffy Summers, and this is Xander Harris," the Slayer introduced herself and her ghostly companion.
"Look, we can't stay here! Please, come with us, my house isn't far away – we'll be safe there. Okay?" Buffy said pleadingly, keeping an eye out for anything big and bad deciding to target the three of them.
Vasquez looked to be in two minds about it, but after the appearance of a couple of unfriendlies she figured that discretion was indeed the better part of valour, and decided to follow these two to their base until she could hook up with her squad again.
***
1630 Revello Drive, Sunnydale, California
A while later
Buffy slammed the front door shut after retrieving a screaming Lady Cordelia from the street outside, inwardly cursing over the delay in getting to her Watcher and obtaining Giles' help in solving this mess. "Xander! What's going on here?"
The ghost boy just gestured helplessly to Private Vasquez, who was still aiming her gun at him. "Uh, the person currently possessing Willow doesn't seem to like me very much?"
"What the fuck are you?" Vasquez demanded, as she had recently learned that Xander was currently non-corporeal. "Some sorta hologram? Don't see no emitters anywhere..."
Buffy went and pulled the white ghost sheet off of Xander's body. "No, he's a ghost. Y'know, spirit, spectre, lost soul on the holiday train?"
Lady Cordelia fainted in the background, but unfortunately, no one took any notice of it as a narrow-eyed Vasquez half-snarled to the Slayer, "You gotta be kidding me, right? What is this, some sort of joke? Last thing I remember before showing up here was dying alongside that idiot lieutenant Gorman – so, what? You're trying to tell me this is Heaven?"
"No, no, this isn't Heaven. In fact, this place is a lot closer to Hell, what with the Hellmouth less than two miles away," Xander wisecracked. He wished he could sit down, but the ghost knew that his body would just sink straight through the furniture.
"Look, I gotta go. Xander, keep an eye on them, don't let any harm come to Willow and...Cordelia?" Miss Summers turned around, and finally spied her unconscious classmate. Groaning, she quickly moved the female onto the same couch Xander's body was resting on, before she saw the ghost's expression. "What?"
"Did you have to put her quite so close to me?" Xander complained. "I may be dead right now, but I'd still prefer a bit of a DMZ between me and the harpy."
"What?" Vasquez whipped her head back and forth between the Slayer and her friend.
"Never mind," Xander shook his head. "And hey, how exactly am I supposed to accomplish anything if something big and bad starts smashing down the door? In case you haven't noticed, Buff, I'm not exactly handi-capable right now."
"I know, but I'm the Slayer, I gotta go back out there. So I need you to stay here," she elaborated, "because we can't leave Willow here all alone in her current condition. God only knows what might happen," Buffy pointed out the obvious.
"Fine," Xander said grouchily. He knew that there was no other choice, not with the phones out of commission. If it had been anyone else, the youth would have suggested that he go to the library to find Giles; but Buffy had the whole superpowers-sacred duty-yadda, yadda, yadda thing on her side. "I'll man the fort until you get back. Good luck!"
"You too," Miss Summers nodded, before she stepped out the door and Xander asked Vasquez to lock it behind her.
Buffy's undead boyfriend Angel soon showed up, though, and so after explaining the situation Harris left him to look after things at Casa del Summers. The disembodied spirit headed for the school himself, and helped Giles research what was going on, since Buffy had already left after the briefing to try to restore some semblance of order on the streets.
That was why the young man was present when Giles confronted Ethan in his store, and Harris got a firsthand view of who 'Ripper' was.
"Break the spell, Ethan. Then leave this place and never come back," the British Watcher said, when it became obvious Xander wasn't going to obey his orders and depart the costume shop.
"Why should I? What's in the bargain for me?" Rayne asked with a smarmy look.
"What? There are people dying out there, British man! Look at me, I'm one of 'em!" Xander exclaimed, gesturing to himself.
"Tell me what I want to know, Ethan, or I'll kick your arse like you wouldn't believe," Giles promised simply.
"Oh, Rupert, you're scaring me," Rayne sneered.
Giles instantly punched him in the gut with his left hand, making his compatriot double over, and followed up with a right hook to the face. The usually stuffy and uptight Englishman then began to deliver a thrashing the likes of which Xander had never seen – and considering the Harris family legacy, that was really saying something.
"Tell me how to stop the spell," Giles commanded again, when Ethan was lying bruised, battered and helpless on the ground.
"Say 'pretty please'," the chaos mage said in reply, which earned him a kick to the kidneys and another scream of pain.
Xander couldn't stomach watching any more of this. "Dude, you're just pissing him off now! Look, all you gotta do is tell us what's the what already. Come on, is what you're doing here in Sunnydale worth dying for?"
Oddly, that seemed to reach through to the British magician. "Statue of Janus in the back. Break it to end the spell."
At once, Xander and Giles raced into the back room of the store. The older man instantly grabbed the two-headed statue, lifted it up and threw the marble bust hard down onto the floor.
The effects were immediately obvious.
Throughout the town, all the possessed people were released from the spell's effects – which was why Xander disappeared from the costume shop and woke up in his own body, safe and sound within 1630 Revello Drive. The teen got up, and saw Willow, Cordelia and Angel staring at him – Buffy was elsewhere, finally relaxing as all the little kids around her started crying and calling out for their mommies.
"Hey, what's with the looks? Come on, this is Sunnydale; you guys never saw a dead person suddenly come back to life before?" Xander made a relatively feeble joke, as he stretched a little to work the kinks out of his body.
( Here we go with the dead jokes again, ) Angel thought in annoyance as Cordelia sneered and Willow hugged her romantic crush fiercely. The vampire ruminated silently, ( I should have known that my luck wouldn't last, and that idiot kid wouldn't stay dead for long... )
***
Sunnydale High School Biology Lab, Sunnydale, California
December 10th, 1997
Things had been busy at Sunnydale High over the last six weeks or so, there was no doubt about that.
The vampire named Spike had sent one of his minions here to steal a book from Rupert Giles – a spell-book containing information that could be used to heal sick members of the undead. The sleepwalker demon named Eyghon had also shown up here, wanting to kill its former initiates; namely, Giles and Ethan. And Career Week had also taken place here, around the time Spike's sire, Drusilla, had been cured of her affliction, but with William the Bloody ending up in a wheelchair instead. Despite the odds, even an evil robot calling itself Ted Buchanan had appeared here, as part of its dastardly plan to carry off Buffy's mother Joyce to his so-called 'bunker of love' and eventually kill her.
But none of that mattered right now, because the Scooby Gang had the latest monster of the week to deal with; the pre-prehistoric demons known as the Bezoars.
Xander stared at the egg hatchling laid out in a dissection tray. He tapped his fingers on the table as he and Buffy examined the dead demon infant. The young man then said, "Can I just say, gyughhh!"
Miss Summers nodded. "I see your 'gyughhh!' and raise you a nyaghhh!"
Cordelia simply asked, "What is it?"
Xander looked at her in exasperation, despite the fact that he had been secretly making out with the cheerleader for the past month or so. "We don't know what it is, Cordelia, that's why we're here. Capisce?"
"'Capisce'? What are you, world traveller now?" Cordy retorted.
Buffy saw Willow arrive into the science lab at that moment and asked her, "Hey, where's Giles? I know he won't wanna miss this."
"He said to get started. He'll be by as soon as possible," was the redhead's rather flat reply.
"So, okay! Get started, Buffy! Dissect it or something," Xander said, holding out a scalpel to her.
Buffy accepted the surgical knife but said, "Me? Why do I have to dissect it?"
"Uh, because you're the Slayer?" Harris asked her.
"And I slayed! My work here is done," Miss Summers replied, putting the scalpel down with a grossed-out expression on her face.
Xander couldn't help but notice she'd put the scalpel down in front of him, and he was able to put two and two together easily. So he immediately said, "Oh, no, I almost ATE one of those things. I think I've fulfilled my gross-out quota for the decade."
"I'll do it," Willow volunteered, as she picked up the scalpel. Unfortunately nobody noticed the near-lifeless tone of voice, or realized that she had been neural-clamped by one of the live Bezoar hatchlings and turned into a mindless automaton.
The dissection proceeded normally until Xander asked, "So, what are the odds that one of these things was responsible for Mr. Whitmore's disappearance, huh?"
"It's possible that Mr. Whitmore wasn't harmed. Maybe the offspring simply used him to return to the mother Bezoar," Willow offered, referring to the currently missing science teacher.
"Yeah. Maybe he..." Xander turned to Willow in confusion. "What?"
Neither he nor Buffy noticed Cordelia picking up a metal bar, which she wielded like a baseball bat; because she, too, had just been neural-clamped like Willow.
The Slayer managed to say "What's a bez-" before getting hit in the face with the bar, knocking her down and out.
"Cordy! What-" Xander started to say in disbelief before Willow grabbed a microscope and smashed him over the head with it, and then the universe went black.
***
17619 White Oak Drive, Sunnydale, California
Later that night
The crisis with the Bezoar offspring had been solved, with Buffy saving the day the way she always did: killing the bad guy, in this case the mother Bezoar, with a big sharp weapon. That wasn't the problem, though; the problem was that Xander, who had woken up and had been hit by the possessed Cordelia in the exact same place Willow had hit him, was about to have a rather unusual encounter of the supernatural kind.
Now, Xander knew that he had been seeing dead people in his town ever since midway through his sophomore year of high school. This was the point when Buffy had come to Sunnydale, and his eyes had been opened to the real world containing vampires and demons. But even so, Harris was about to become someone unique, thanks to being a ghost for Halloween; and the two blows to the head altering his brain chemistry enough to allow him to see things which normal people couldn't.
"You bastard," Jesse McNally snarled at him as Xander entered his bedroom. "How DARE you steal my girl? I'm gonna get you for that, you son of a bitch!"
Xander's eyes went wide at the sight of the 15-year-old boy with a nasty vampire bite mark in his neck. McNally had been his best friend before he had died during the Harvest, after all. But that was so long ago, now...
"Jesse?" he managed to choke out.
"What the-? You're actually talking to me?" Jesse demanded in disbelief. "Xander, I've been cursing you non-stop for the past month, you lousy girlfriend-stealer! Why are you suddenly paying attention to me now?"
"You can't be Jesse. Jesse's dead," Xander said, shaking his head.
"What are you talking about? I'm not dead," the restless spirit declared, not knowing the truth. When Xander stuck his arm through the dead boy's chest, though, the ghost screamed in shock and horror.
"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?" the Jesse ghost looked completely and utterly freaked.
"What are you, a ghost? Yeah, I think you are," Xander marvelled, before his face fell. "Oh, dude, you're a ghost? Jesse...I think we need to talk."
***
Sunnydale High School, Sunnydale, California
December 11th, 1997
Xander had filled in Giles on what had really happened yesterday with the Bezoars, as he'd promised to do after the librarian had concocted a big 'gas leak' cover-up the previous evening. But now, Harris had another task in front of him: to fulfil Jesse's request regarding Cordelia, which meant dragging the brunette girl into the nearest convenient broom closet.
"Hey! Caveman much?" Miss Chase complained, rubbing her arm and scowling at Xander. Then she shrugged and smiled, reaching up to switch off the light. "We're gonna have to make this snappy, doofus. We have English class coming up next, remember?"
Xander switched the light back on after she'd turned it off, much to Cordy's surprise. "I didn't bring you in here for us to do...that."
"What? Xander, I thought we cleared this up two days ago. You don't like it when I talk, and I don't like having to see your face, whenever we make out together. Hey, if I wanted stimulating conversation or a view of some decent eye-candy, I wouldn't be in here with you – I'd be where I belong, with the rest of my social circle!" Cordelia snapped.
"Cordelia. Whether I like it or not, we do need to talk," Xander said, straining to keep his annoyance on a leash.
"About what, you big dweeb?" Miss Chase demanded.
"We're not alone in here," Xander turned to stare at an empty part of the broom closet. He pointed and said, "Jesse's ghost is standing right there, even though you can't see him."
"What kind of lame-ass crazy talk is this?" Cordelia shook her head. "Forget it, I'm outta here!"
"No, Cordy, wait. I can prove it," Xander said, seeing a very upset Jesse staring longingly at her. "Ask me anything that only Jesse would know. He'll tell me the answer right here, right now, and I'll relay it to you. Please? I, I think he needs this in order to be able to move on. Will you do this for me?"
"Fine," Cordelia said with a patronising sneer. "Alright, that guy sent me a love letter last year, and there was sort of a song-slash-poem in it at the end. Jesse swore that he came up with it all by himself, and that he'd never share it with anybody but me; and I never mentioned it to a living soul after I burned that stupid letter of his. So come on, Xander, let's hear it – how exactly did that little melody go?"
Xander looked just as embarrassed as Jesse, as he began to parrot the ghost's lyrics: "Oh, Cordelia! How I'd like to feel ya! I am an island basking in your sunshine-"
"STOP IT!" the girl instantly shrieked, a look of horror appearing on her face. "Xander, HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?"
Harris just gestured to the corner of the closet where, as far as Cordelia was concerned, there was nothing but empty space. "Like I said. He's standing right there."
Cordy immediately jumped into her paramour's arms, finally becoming a true believer and staring at the empty space. Not thinking about how and why it was that Xander could suddenly see and hear ghosts, the young woman simply said, "Well, GET LOST! Jesse, this is creepy on a scale too much for me to...oh my God! Have you been watching me in the shower ever since you died, you little pervert?!"
"No, of course not," Xander said swiftly, after witnessing the ghost's frantic denials and headshakes. "Until last night, Jesse didn't know he was dead – he honestly thought he was still alive, and his parents were making him live in the basement with all his stuff. Both of us were surprised as all get out when the truth hit us in the face, actually. But getting back on topic, Cor, the reason I brought you in here was this." Xander let the girl go and backed away a little. "Okay, pal, I'm ready. I invite you in."
"What?" Cordelia asked, as she saw Xander close his eyes. "What's going on?" she asked, as she saw her companion open them again.
"Cordelia," the young man said in a pensive, love-filled tone of voice. "It's me, Jesse." He saw Cordy's eyes go wide, and then felt a stinging slap as her palm connected with his cheek. "OW! What did you do that for?" he demanded, a look of surprise and hurt on his face.
"If that's really you – get out of Xander's body right now, you moron!" the Sunnydale High beauty queen hissed angrily. "What the hell do you two dorks think you're doing?! And why are you doing it, as if I couldn't guess – Xander just HAD to be his usual idiotic self..."
"You really do care about him," Jesse said using Xander's mouth, his eyes becoming sad and withdrawn. "I never realized it until just now, but I should have known. You wouldn't have gotten involved with my best bud if there weren't real feelings involved, right? I mean I've watched you date so many guys over the past year – Mitch, Kevin, Steve, Larry, Devon..."
"Not helping your case here, Stalker Boy!" Cordelia hissed angrily. "Now like I said, get out of there!"
"Cordelia..."
"And just so we understand each other – I, I never loved you. In fact, I was never even remotely interested in you. I'm pretty sure that that's not what you wanted to hear, but unfortunately, it's the truth and there's nothing I can do about it. Look, Jesse, I'm sorry you died and all, but there's nothing I can do about that, either – so if you see a light anywhere? Head towards it!" Cordelia ordered the ghost in no uncertain terms.
"Cordelia? I already knew all that," Jesse said dejectedly. "I just wanted to wish you all the best in the future, and for you to know that what I felt for you wasn't just a crush or anything – I did love you, that's why it really hurt me when you and Xander hooked up together. I guess that, that you and I...just weren't ever meant to be. So goodbye and good luck, sweetheart," the ghost said farewell, before closing his eyes and drifting out of Harris's body.
"Oh, sweet mamalooshin," Xander muttered, as he opened his eyes and the friendly possession ended. "That was...that was..."
He knew that he had been taking a big chance doing that – if Jesse had decided not to leave, or if it had been impossible for him to go out the same way he'd come in, then the situation would have been completely FUBAR. But now his best friend was free to leave behind the world of the living, and so in Xander's opinion, the risk had been worth it. "That felt so weird..."
Cordelia promptly slapped him again. "You JERK! What the hell were you thinking, pulling a stunt like that just now? Because at the end of the movie, even the priest died!"
"This is real life and not 'The Exorcist', Cor," Xander rubbed his cheek, thinking that he had to learn how to duck whenever the women-folk decided to slap him.
"And I did it because I had to. That night, when Jesse's undead alter ego was dusted at the Bronze...I was the one who staked him," Xander confessed, leaving out the part where the staking was almost entirely accidental. "So this was as much for my benefit as his, for both of us to get some closure on that."
"Well, you ever do anything like that again and I'll kill you myself!" Cordelia promised him fervently. "Now come on, I'm sure we're late for class!"
But there was one more thing that Xander had to say first; and after he was done, Cordelia ran out the door trying not to cry her eyes out.
Because Harris had just told her that it was over between them, that their little broom closet trysts were finished.
Cordy hadn't waited around to hear his reasons; all she knew was that Xander had just hurt her worse than she'd ever anticipated or even imagined was possible, and that things would never be the same again.
***
Shadyhill Cemetery, Sunnydale, California
March 1st, 1998
Things certainly hadn't been the same ever since the break-up; Miss Chase hadn't been wrong about that.
First, there had been that nasty business with Angel losing his soul after he and Buffy had made love during her 17th birthday, and the situation with the demon known as the Judge. Second, Willow had finally moved on from her Halloween possession and her hopeless crush on Xander, beginning to date a senior named Oz – who was also a werewolf. Third, Cordelia had blackmailed the witch named Amy Madison into doing a love spell to get Xander back – but it had backfired badly, and Queen C had almost gotten herself raped before Amy had undone the mojo.
But the most important thing of all had been the undercover gypsy named Jenny Calendar – or Janna of the Kalderash tribe – getting killed, after the soulless version of Angel had murdered her to prevent the woman from cursing him with a soul again.
"This must be so horrible for poor Rupert," Jenny's ghost said to Xander, as they watched Buffy and Giles depart the freshly-dug grave. "Xander, are you sure you can't-"
"No. I'm sorry, Ms. C, but no more possessions for me," Xander said firmly, recalling what had happened after the former Principal Flutie had begged him for that sort of time-share deal. "That door opens wider and wider every time I do it, and it gets harder for me to shut it every time, too. If this keeps up, I'm afraid that one day, I'll be an open house to any spook that tries to force their way inside me," Xander said plainly.
"I understand," the female shade nodded sadly. "But what I don't understand is why you didn't take Cordelia back after that love spell fiasco; it's obvious you still have feelings for the girl-"
"She can do better than dating one of the Scooby Gang," Xander interrupted firmly. "I mean Slayer, witch, werewolf, and...whatever the hell you wanna call me these days. Cordy should be with someone...I dunno, normal. A guy who can give her a future-"
"Like your friend Jesse, had he lived," Jenny interrupted this time. "Are you sure it isn't guilt you're feeling, Xander? Or is that after experiencing everything your best friend felt for that girl, someone he loved with all his heart, you thought that what you felt for her...simply didn't measure up?"
"I don't want to discuss my love life with you, Ms. Calendar," Harris said firmly, even though it was obvious her shots had hit home. "I – son of a bitch!!" Xander cursed, as he abandoned the female ghost and marched over to where a man in his mid-twenties was wearing 18th century period clothing. "What are YOU doing here?!"
"Xander?" Liam O'Reilly, a.k.a. Angel's soul, asked in surprise. "You can see me?"
"Yeah, unfortunately. Now answer the goddamn question," Harris said roughly. "If you're here to gloat over Ms. Calendar's grave-"
"Why would I do that?" Liam demanded. "You think I took any pleasure in watching my demon kill her? You think I'm happy that Buffy can't differentiate between me and Angelus, and let him go at the mall a month ago?"
"Buffy did WHAT?" Xander whirled around, wanting to talk to Jenny about this – but it was too late, her Uncle Enyos was already escorting her to the land of the dead and they both slowly faded away in front of his eyes.
So Harris turned back to the Irish-born ghost and said, "Tell me everything!"
***
Abandoned mansion on Crawford Street, Sunnydale, California
May 13th, 1998
The time for the final battle had come, and Xander knew that if he survived it, he was definitely getting out of Sunnydale afterwards.
His talent – or curse, if you wanted to look at it that way – had grown in range and strength, so much so that Harris saw dead people everywhere he looked nowadays. Thus, given the number of human deaths due to the 'night life' in this town, their screams and moans were making it impossible for Xander to live his life here anymore.
It had all started during the encounter with der Kindestod, at Sunnydale General Hospital. Harris had seen more than the usual number of ghosts whilst watching Buffy's back, when she was bed-ridden with the flu. Xander had also seen Angel's soul glaring at Angelus whilst the soulless demon was talking; but it had been his reaction to all those dead children wandering the corridors that had thrown Angelus off-stride enough to think Harris had set up some sort of trap, and that he should just leave.
Later that month, the poltergeist Jim Stanley had shown up and had briefly possessed Xander without his consent; just before the dead teacher named Grace Newman had likewise possessed Cordelia. Luckily, the two ghosts had departed for the afterlife after Harris had somehow put a crimp in the usual murder/suicide scenario. The taste of Cordelia's lips had lasted long after the girl had left him, though, making Xander wonder if Jenny Calendar hadn't been right all along about the feelings of guilt and inadequacy.
During April, there had been the tragedy with the swim team fish monsters, and Xander hadn't enjoyed listening to the ghost of Nurse Greenleigh cursing and bitching at Coach Marin after both of them had been killed by the marine mutants.
At least all that had been taken care of relatively quickly, even if his girls were still giving him strange looks every time the topic of those red Speedo's came up during the conversation.
But two days ago, the demon statue of Acathla had been discovered buried at the site where some low-rent housing was planned to be built. Upon learning of its existence, Angelus had decided that he didn't like the world very much, so he'd use the stone demon to send everyone to Hell – once he got the big ugly piece of rock to open its mouth.
Willow and Buffy had come up with the idea to re-ensoul Angelus in order to stop this from happening, and Xander had to admit – as a backup plan, it made sense. Angel's ghost wasn't exactly keen on the idea, but if worse came to worst, Liam's wishes were irrelevant as far as Harris was concerned. The thing that bothered him, though, was that after the Slayer named Kendra had been killed during Willow's first attempt to carry out the spell, the redhead had fallen into a coma; and yet almost immediately after coming out of it, Miss Rosenberg was insisting on trying to do the soul curse again.
"I feel weird," Angel's ghost said to Xander, as he snuck into the mansion to get the kidnapped Giles out of there. "Something's wrong, I don't know what – but I feel like something's going to happen to me. Soon."
( Could be Willow's setting up to do the curse, ) Xander thought to himself, as he finally found Giles and carried the tortured Watcher out of the house. ( Well, if it works, it works. If it doesn't – God, I hope Dead Boy was right when he insisted that I tell Buffy the truth outside the mansion just now! )
After dumping the delirious Englishman into a car outside on Crawford Street, Xander went back to the scene of the battle. Buffy was fighting Angelus and Spike was fighting Drusilla, when all of a sudden the insane female vampire let her childe go and stared hatefully at Xander. "YOU!!"
"Me?" Harris said nervously, wishing he had more than a stake with which to defend himself.
"This is all your fault, it is," Dru snarled, going into her game face. "Miss Edith says you're not my kitten no more – speaker to the lost souls, you are! Ghost whisperer, psst, psst, psst! You and the Angel-beast, you want to hurt my Daddy!"
Luckily for Xander, Spike hit Drusilla over the head with his andiron before she could say anything more or go on the attack. With barely a contemptuous look at the human, the undead guy dragged his unconscious girlfriend away, heading for the garage; his plan was for them to leave the Hellmouth behind in their car, once and for all.
As the Slayer and Angelus continued sword-fighting, Liam turned to Xander. "He's going to kill her! Buffy's stalling, I can tell; she's waiting for the curse to take effect!"
( Great, ) Xander thought to himself scathingly. ( Serves me right for thinking with my heart instead of my head a few minutes ago. ) "So what do you suggest we do?"
"You don't know how to use one of those things. But I do," Angel's ghost said pleadingly, pointing at the flashing swords. "Please, Xander, I know you don't want me in there, and I'm not exactly happy with the idea myself – but it's the whole world at stake here! We don't have time for squeamishness now, right?"
"I already know I'm gonna regret this," Xander muttered, before he said, "Fine! Just do it already..."
After the deed was done, in the large living room Angelus was looking down at the disarmed Slayer trapped against the wall. "You know, I have to say Buff..." the soulless demon taunted, as he pressed the tip of his sword into her neck. "I was right before, you never learn. Trying to stall that way? I mean, is it me, or was your heart just not in this-?"
As Buffy felt the tip of the blade draw blood, the vampire's eyes rolled back in his head. Buffy's sword, which had been forgotten behind them, suddenly rammed its way out of Angelus's chest – thanks to Liam aiming at just the right place to incapacitate the bloodsucker.
"ANGEL!" Buffy instinctively screamed.
"He's not Angel, I am," Liam said using Xander's mouth, as he withdrew the sword out of the vampire's chest and Angelus fell to the ground.
"What?" Buffy asked in confusion, staring at her friend's possessed body. The thing was that Xander hadn't shared his secret about being able to act as a temporary way-station for spirits, ever since last year, with anyone apart from Cordelia. Thus, Miss Summers had no idea what was going on.
Liam tossed her the sword which Angelus had dropped. "It's me, Buffy, Angel. I'm possessing Xander right now, I...oh no," he said, as he spied the activated form of Acathla. The sword had been withdrawn from the demon statue, and it was only a matter of time now before the world was destroyed. "That crazy bastard, he actually pulled it off?! The Earth is gonna end up in Hell!"
"Angel? Is, is that really you?" Buffy asked in dazed wonder, she was focusing on what was truly important to her and wanting to believe that her soul mate was back. "But how-?"
"Not now!" Liam yelled. "Buffy, do you have any idea how we can shut Acathla down and save the world? Because I don't!"
Luckily, the Chosen One knew what to do, as she ordered her unexpected ally to help her get Angelus up. ( I hope this works, I hope this works... )
Not all that far away at the hospital, Willow was reaching the big finale of the soul curse. She spoke the final words, "Acum! Acum!"
However, because Angel's soul was currently trapped within a mortal shell, the Orb simply exploded, spraying her, Oz and Cordelia with shards of glass and causing a lot of minor lacerations. Willow and Cordelia screamed in fear and pain, but it didn't matter; the ritual had failed, and all those present wondered numbly if that meant the planet was now doomed.
Back at the mansion, Acathla's face suddenly changed, with his brows angled down; his eyes started glowing red, and his mouth opened up. The swirling vortex to Hell appeared; small at first, but growing steadily in size and emanating a deep, red glow.
Buffy stabbed Angelus again with the blessed sword and shoved him forward, the unconscious vampire heading straight for the expanding vortex. When the two interacted, Acathla's mouth suddenly closed without so much as a spark, the vortex abruptly disappearing and taking Angelus with it.
"Is it over?" Liam asked, staring at where Acathla was lying dormant.
"I, I think so," Buffy stammered. "Angel, how did this happen?! I mean, I don't – did, did that soul ritual thingy put you into Xander's body instead of your own? I don't get why THAT would have taken place..."
"It wasn't the curse," Angel-in-Xander said with a tired tone of voice. "I think Willow tried it, but it didn't work. Buffy, as soon as I saw Angelus about to kill you, I asked Xander to let me possess him – and luckily, he agreed. Just in time."
"Huh?" Buffy simply didn't get it.
Even though Liam knew that Harris didn't want him to do it, he nonetheless explained everything. He explained how he had been hanging around for the last four months, helplessly watching everything that had happened and being able to communicate only with Xander. He then went on to explain how the young man was a very different person now to what he had been last year, in terms of what he could see and hear as a spirit medium.
"Why the HELL didn't he tell me about this?!" Buffy shouted angrily, furious at having been kept in the dark this way. "My God, what was Xander thinking?! I could have-"
"You could have what, Buffy? Demanded that Xander let me possess him before now? You don't get it; my presence here is a violation even worse than rape. Sweetheart, the only reason he let me in was that I'm a better fighter than he is, especially with the broken arm that Xander's carrying. But now that the emergency is over...it's time for me to leave."
"WHAT? NO! Angel, don't you dare!!" Buffy commanded him furiously. "I just got you back, and now you're going to take off on me again? NO WAY!"
"Buffy," Liam sighed using Xander's lungs. "Please, listen to what I'm trying to tell you. I'm dead. My body is in Hell, and my soul can't stay in here any longer; that would be a terrible crime in so many different ways..."
He forced himself to say it. "...I can't believe that you'd ever be selfish enough to think that that was a viable option."
"But, but..." Buffy said desperately.
"No, Buffy, I'm sorry – but I have to go," Angel's soul said firmly. "I love you, and I always will. I'll be waiting for you in Heaven when the time comes, but for now, it's time for us to say goodbye." The ghost used Xander's body to gently kiss her on the lips, before ascending out of the corporeal vessel and heading upwards.
Xander instantly yanked himself backwards, startling Miss Summers into her opening her eyes. "Okay, that's it! I am NEVER doing that again, end of the world or otherwise!"
"Xander?" Buffy asked uncertainly. Her shattered heart was desperately hoping that her boyfriend was still there, but deep down she knew that he wasn't; that that part of her life was over now.
"Yeah, Buff, I'm back in the driver's seat," Xander said with a freaked look on his face. "And just for the record that was Angel who just kissed you, not me – so no Slayer tantrum or payback or anything, okay? Come on, we gotta get Giles to the hospital..."
Following Xander out of the mansion, Miss Summers did her best to help her Watcher as her friend drove them to Sunnydale General. Afterwards, she drove the car back to where they'd found it, and then the Chosen One went to hole up in Rupert's condo – because Joyce had basically thrown her out of the house not long ago, warning her not to ever return if she left last night.
Less than a week later, however, Buffy was living at home again, as junior year finally finished. Willow and Oz were visiting her there, but Cordelia was with Xander at the bus station as he prepared to leave his home town.
"So you're really going," Miss Chase said in what sounded like an off-hand tone, but was actually anything but. "You're transferring to Hemery High School for senior year?"
"Yep. I'm gonna be living with my Uncle Rory over the summer," Xander said distractedly. "My parents don't mind. Actually, if anything they're glad I'm going. Bottom line, it means more money in the household budget for them to buy booze."
"So why isn't everyone else here?" Cordelia asked, looking around for a moment. "I thought there'd be, like, a huge crowd of well-wishers to see you off or whatever."
"I already did the big farewell thing with the Scooby Gang this morning," Xander replied, as his bags were stowed away on the bus. "I'm kinda surprised you didn't show up, actually. Guess you didn't know?"
"No, it's just I wanted to say goodbye in private. For some reason, I'm gonna miss you – even though you tore my heart out and stomped all over it back then," Cordelia stated, her tone suddenly icy.
Xander exhaled, figuring he should have known this was coming. "If you're referring to what happened that night between Jim and Grace, both of us were POSSESSED at the time-"
"Don't try to give me that horse hockey – you KNOW how I feel about you. And you can deny it all you want, but I know that you still feel something for me as well," Miss Chase said angrily – she simply couldn't help it.
"So what if I do? Cordelia, you look around at this bus station and see nothing unusual. Me? I see a dead wino sitting right over there," Xander pointed to a nearby empty bench. "I see a guy with his throat ripped out near the ticket booth. I see a mangled Girl Scout over by the front doors.
"Don't you get it? I see dead people, ALL THE TIME!!" he half-yelled in frustration. "Do you want to live in that sort of world? I don't, but then I really don't have a choice about it. You do. So find yourself a decent normal guy and forget about me," Harris said passionately. He then gave her a quick kiss on the forehead before grabbing his ticket and heading for the bus. "Goodbye and good luck, Cor-"
At that moment, Cordelia grabbed him and kissed her ex-boyfriend like he'd never been kissed before. There was sparkage, and fireworks, and everything else they'd once shared before Miss Chase abruptly let Xander go.
"That was for you to remember me, and to make sure you're ruined for all those other girls you'll meet in LA," Cordelia promised him. Then she slapped Xander hard enough to make his teeth rattle. "And that was for being idiotic enough to ever give me up in the first place!"
Xander blinked, dazed, as the brunette cheerleader turned around and stormed off. ( Women... ) he thought to himself fuzzily.
Harris then shook his head and got on board the bus, as the vehicle started up and began to move. The young man never noticed the balance demon calling himself Whistler staring at him carefully – and likewise, Harris had no idea how when high school was over he would find himself working alongside Miss Chase again, in the employ of Doyle Investigations.
The City of Angels had no idea what was about to hit it.
***
Next: Story 24 - Yankee Horse Soldier