Answer 1: You'll see later.

Answer 2: I don't know why, but I somehow doubt that.

Answer 3: I think they want to party me to death.

Disclaimer: You know, it's getting boring... NGE, it's characters and Microsoft do not belong to me. (But it would be profitable! Either way…)

Personal Note: I am sober again! I want to thank my reviewers. And to all my fans, (I am sure, I can count them with one hand though), sorry to keep you waiting, but recently I didn't get any sleep, so my brain is not worth a lot. (isn't worth a lot at other times neither)

Some say, I am going too far... Jesus, I wouldn't want to switch place with him, but hey, this is my fan fiction. You don't have to read it! As a balance, he is a lucky guy in some of my other fanfictions. And by the way, he IS invincible! So, he will survive this day, more or less.

"Rockin' all over the world!" This is in speech (no further specifications at this time!)

'Yep, I love ROCK!' This is in thought (means speaking, but not to you and not outloud!)

-:WOODSTOCK, I'M COMING:- Phone/Radio communication!

Drool drool This is what people actually do, in mid sentence (when they see hot chicks, in this case!)

-\-\-\-\-\-\- flashback -\-\-\-\-\-\- This is the start of a flashback

-/-/-/-/-/-/- flashback end -/-/-/-/-/-/- hmmm, is this a Super Nova? I don't think so…

!(A/N: Ich bin kein Berliner, ICH BIN BAYER!)! This is me.

Chapter Five: The Voyage Home

Finally, after so many painful hours, the school's bell announced the end of this class. Shinji Ikari, suddenly filled with new energy, hope and a smile on his face, was the first one out of class.

"Hey Shinji, wait up." Kensuke ran up to him. "Should I accompany you?"

Shinji, who would be grateful to this offer on a normal day, decided otherwise.

"Better not; I don't want to be responsible for the painful death of one of my friends."

In front of the school, Toji took Shinji aside.

"Hey pal, you'll tell me if something happens to you on your way home, right?"

"I should be home in twenty minutes, I'll call you in half an hour. If I do not, the train blew up and you can scrape me off the streets." Shinji said and waved a goodbye.

"He has strange humour, alright" muttered Toji.

While almost everyone walked to the left, Shinji went right. His school bag shouldered and his SDAT running, he walked towards the train station. As he arrived, he was surprised.

'No pain, no incidents, not a bad thing at all. Perhaps I am on the lucky side again.' he thought hopefully.

Smiling like a Cheshire cat he got into a train. He sat down, closed his eyes and counted the number of stops.

'The fifth one is mine.' So Shinji thought and listened to his music while daydreaming.

'What am I gonna do first once I'm home?' His stomach grumbled. 'I think, cooking sounds like a very advisable idea.'

Shinji, for once at peace on this day, counted the stations down. He listened to Beethoven's 9th symphony: the Ode To Joy.

After a while, the fifth and his last stop came. He stood up and got off the train.

"Wait a second..." Shinji looked around, his SDAT still running.

"This is not my station…" Shinji was confused.

"This is not even the right part of the city..." Shinji, who had enough of this day, wanted to put his SDAT into his schoolbag. Just then he noticed that he had left his schoolbag on the train.

'Damn it' he turned around, just to see his schoolbag driving away in the train.

He slowly raised his head and looked up to the sky, which was getting cloudy.

"YOU! You call that humour? If I ever come to heaven, I gonna kick your ass for sure! I swear to god… wait a second… DAMN!" He cursed and walked off.

Shinji Ikari made his way home, without money and without anything in his stomach.

After a while, he stopped and looked around. "I've never been here before stomach-grumble And I don't have any money for food or a taxi. I hate my life."

"Hey, look at him! Shall we beat him up?" Shinji turned around to see a couple of drunk thugs.

'Why me?'

"Yeah, let's kick his ass!" they began storming towards him.

'Perhaps I should let them kill me, so it'll be over' he took a closer look to his followers 'Let's not find out'

Shinji began running. He didn't know where to run; He seemed to be in the slums. The buildings, most of them destroyed or damaged during an angel attack, were not occupied. Shinji, in his phase of bad luck, stumbled over a manhole cover and it broke. Falling down the shaft Shinji could hear the thugs run past the hole.

'I am saved.'

Only a second later, he landed in some water. As he stood up, he looked around.

"I can't see much sniff and what's that stench?" then Shinji realized, that he had fallen into the city sewers.

"Oh shit… in the truest sense of a word." Because there was no ladder, he couldn't climb back up. The only way out was somewhere in the darkness.

----- The Suzuhara household ----

-:Yeah, I think something happened waiting for the answer on the phone Should we call Major Katsuragi? waiting again Don't you think, he could really die today? waiting and going up and down the carpet You call yourself a friend? waiting Alright, you got a point there. But I am sure, something happened to him yet, so the bet will not be affected going to the fridge You're right, who knows if she really wants to help him. Perhaps Asuka would be with her. But what's with that Section Two guys? taking a ham-sandwich out of the fridge Right, they are armed. They would probably shoot one of his toes off. moan You know what that means? waits No, we will have to look for him. taking a bite from his sandwich Because we are his friends. We will meet in front of his apartment in ten minutes. I'll call Hikari, she will help for sure looking for something do drink That's a joke, isn't it? I mean, Rei Ayanami? I doubt she cares if Shinji is in trouble or in a coffin. You forgot? She is hanging around with Shinji's dad! waiting again ARE YOU NUTS??? That man is a real bastard. picking his nose Because he would sacrifice everyone for a can of coke! looking at his finger with some disgust Alright, you can call and ask her if it's that what makes you happy. But in ten minutes, you'll be at Shinji's apartment, or I'll come and get your ass over there by force, understood? frowns deep alright, see ya!:-

----- The Horaki household -----

"Hikari, there's a phone call for you!"

"Coming" Hikari ran down the stairs, heading for the phone.

-:Yes blushing slightly Suzuhara, what so you want? waiting A rescue mission? playing with her hair Does this mean, I've lost our bet? waiting hopefully So I really have to go out on a date with you now smiling Alright, I'll be there.:-

Hikari ran up the stairs, looking for something to dress.

----- The Ayanami ... can anyone call that building an apartment? ----

Rei was sittting there, looking out of a window and waiting for the time to pass by. Then, her cell phone rang.

-:Hello waiting Why? waiting This is not my assignment waiting It's an illogical undertaking, Section Two agents would fit this work waiting Comradeship? blinking and waiting I'll be there.:-

----- The Katsuragi household -----

"Alright, where is that boy when I need him?" Misato shouted into the apartment.

"I haven't seen him since school." Asuka said, watching some anime on television.

Misato sat in the kitchen, consuming one beer after another (she bought herself some). Pen-pen had retreated into the bathroom.

"I am goddamn hungry and I don't want to cook, so somebody else has to!" Misato's stomach grumbled.

"I will not cook, that's work for the stooge."

What Misato did not see, was that Asuka had a bag of crisps next to her. But it was almost empty by now.

"Let's ask somebody for his whereabouts..." Misato picked up the phone...

----- Section Two Headquarters or whatever -----

The room was filled with many surveillance monitors and other stuff. A phone began to ring. An unfortunate guy answered the call.

-:Section Two Agent Urashimo listening The third child? looking on his monitors We don't know. holding the phone away from his ear I-I-I-It's n-n-not our f-f-fault! thinking of some excuse Our system had a giant crash down 20 minutes ago and nothing is working right now. But as we last saw him, he was on his way to the train station waiting Well, most certainly he took the train. head shaking I am not omniscient rolling his eyes You are his guardian, IF something happens to him, it's not our fault. We are just to observe the Children and to help them if they are in trouble begins to sweat alright major, I will call every agent in duty if someone has seen the third child. getting confused No major, I can not order a pizza for you. Goodbye:- hangs up the phone "Shit..."

"Hey, who was that?" another agent asked.

"Oh, that was Major Misato Katsuragi, Director of NERV operations. She wants us to find out, where the third child is hiding." he said, imitating the commanding voice of Misato.

"Well, I'll make a broadcast."

"We better find him, otherwise we can observe some icebergs in Antarctica. And live on them as well..."

----- The city sewers -----

"SHIT... I hate my life..." Shinji continued his way through the sewers.

------------------

Will Shinji ever find out of that shitty place again? Will the rescue troop find him? Will Gendo Ikari show up?

All that and 629 ½ words more in the next chapter of Shinji's bad day in life.

My inspiration seems to be down... If someone has a cruel idea, let me know!

Eleven days, and only such a bad chapter... MEA CULPA!