Cas: So let me get this straight, you say now you loved me all along? What made you hesitate to tell me with words what you really feel? I can see it in your eyes, you mean all of what you say. I remember so long ago, see I felt that same way.
Received: July 4

Dean almost choked on his burger. He had given up on getting a text back a few days before, because a week was far too much time to wait.

Me: Tell me that you're better and you'd rather just forget that things have got so far.
Sent: July 15

He'd agonized over the words to say, listening to music every second he wasn't tucked into bed and trying to sleep. Finally, drinking and feeling a little angry, he'd found the perfect words.

Cas: Yeah, go ahead and take your cheap shots. I've never been too proud to sin, why don't you rub my face in it?
Received: July 16

The words made him feel a little ashamed of his chosen words the day before.

Me: I've scribbled out my view on faith, on waiting until timing's right. I've sat and pondered on this for days and days and nights and nights.
Sent: August 3

Dean couldn't get Cas out of his head. He was in every thought. Every dream had something about him to it, making him wonder how he'd ever thought that Cas wasn't special.

He had to keep himself from begging for Cas to come back.

Cas: Oh, how can we know? You and I both know. So let's make this boatload of excuses burn and sing.
Received: August 5

There were a million ways Dean could take that text. He pulled himself together before he chose the wrong one.

Me: Go on, just say it. You need me like a bad habit.
Sent: August 6

He wanted him to. He wanted Cas to be just as twisted over him as Dean was.

Cas: You can paint the picture pretty, but it serves as no disguise. It's only getting later now.
Received: August 18

Dean clenched his jaw and tucked his phone in his pocket. He really couldn't afford the looks Sam was going to give him if he ignored Bobby and Ellen for drinking at another family gathering. He hadn't been happy last time and neither had Jo. He still had the bruised ribs to prove it.

Me: I'm like an old man, tight lipped, filled to the brim with only emptiness. Alone in my apartment with all my doubt and shame, regret and bitterness.
Sent: August 21

It was Wednesday, and the sane part of him knew that he shouldn't be drinking. But he woke up feeling sad and he was lonely and the only thing that seemed to want to give him company was the whiskey bottle.

Cas: Look what you have done. You're my favorite song, always on the tip of my tongue. You own me with whispers like poetry; your mouth is a melody I memorize.
Received: August 22

A hangover was pounding in his head and rolling in his stomach, and the smell of burnt oil had already brought him to the bathroom, with plenty of dirty looks from Bobby. But he smiled. Did he own Cas in any way that mattered?

Me: Yeah, you're a blue-eyed lightning bolt.
Sent: August 22

He had laid in bed, wondering what to say. He wanted to say something sweet, but he didn't really know what. Then he heard it. Cas was a phenomenon, a force of nature.

Cas: Tonight, 'cause I can always quit tomorrow. And I'll find my will again.
Received: 5:25PM

A chime had gone off as Dean pulled himself out of his car. He pulled his phone out and tried to figure out what Cas meant. They'd been texting back and forth for more than a month and he didn't think that either of them knew what they were doing.

It was confusing and Dean wasn't sure if he wanted it to stop or go on forever.

He was preoccupied and scrolling through his texts when a soft cough brought his attention up. Leaning against the door, Cas gave him a hesitant smile. Dean just stared for a few seconds, wondering why the idea that he meant to be here tonight had never crossed his mind.

Was there anything he should say? Was Cas going to say anything?

Dean just kept staring into those soul bright eyes and slid his phone in his pocket, fighting not to touch him as he unlocked his door. Cas stood straight just in time to avoid being dumped into the apartment. He kept his eyes on Dean, both men seemingly too confused to do anything but look.

When Cas shut the door behind them, Dean toed off his boots and crossed his arms. He knew that Cas would read the question on his features.

And he was right. "I don't know what I'm doing here, Dean." He leaned himself against the wall like he was tired and crossed his own arms. "I left here and I couldn't stop thinking about it. I don't remember the speech Balthazar told at my wedding, because I was remembering the way your shoulders had looked when you were on your knees."

He gave a glare and Dean felt his flesh heat. He breathed in, ready to speak, but Cas stopped him.

"I sent you a text because I refused to be the type of man that would be unfaithful. The thoughts never left. You never leave my thoughts, Dean, even when you have not contacted me in weeks." He'd started out looking defiantly into Dean's eyes, but now he was looking at the floor and his shoulders were slumped.

Dean gave a small smile while he couldn't see it and stepped closer. When Cas looked up, he looked sad but also daring. He gave another smile and then wrapped his hand around the other man's neck as he kissed him.

Songs in order of text:

A Day Late – Anberlin
Sink into Me – Taking Back Sunday
Cheap Shots – The Classic Crime
Bittersweet Sundown – Framing Hanley
The Fight – The Classic Crime
One Eighty By Summer – Taking Back Sunday
Count Me In – Framing Hanley
Heaven and Hell – The Classic Crime
Tip of my Tongue – The Civil Wars
Logan to Government Center – Brand New
Can Always Quit Tomorrow – Framing Hanley