Look After You- Chapter Thirty
A/N: I'm really sorry about the delay in this update. I had a mixture of severe writer's block combined with the fact that I'm not so much into this fandom as I initially was. However, I am determined to finish this fic, even if I do feel that whatever I write is completely lacklustre. Apologies again for the delay and further apologies for what might be a rubbish chapter, but I felt it better to write something than nothing. Hopefully the next one will be sooner (it will also be the last). Also, many thanks to everyone who took their time to review the last chapter, as well as cajoling me to update.
***
He feels like he's been walking a mile in the dark, waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel to appear. When it does, it's brighter than anything he could ever have imagined.
And it's her.
But she doesn't greet him with a smile. Instead, her face is adorned with a sad expression.
She looks up at him. "Why is it that every time we get so close, we get thrown so far?"
He shakes his head, not knowing the answer. He reaches out to clasp her hand, and she reaches out for his too. Just as he thinks he has a grasp on her, her hand starts to slip and she begins to fade away. He tries so desperately to hold on to her, and she tries her hardest to stay. But she can't. She begins to dim and disappear.
And when she's gone, he can't stop screaming her name.
***
"Lieutenant Paris," a voice called out to Tom. "Lieutenant, can you hear me?"
Tom began to stir.
"Tom?" the voice called out again.
"He's beginning to wake," another voice said.
Tom opened his eyes, only to find the Captain and Doctor looking at him in concern.
He focused his gaze on the Captain.
"Where am I?" he croaked.
"You're back on Voyager, Tom," Kathryn answered.
He tried to remember how he got here from the shuttle, but couldn't.
He attempted to sit up, but the Captain gently pushed him back down.
"Where's B'Elanna?" he demanded.
"We are not certain, lieutenant. We were hoping you might provide us with information on where she might be."
Tom closed his eyes, and tried to quell the immense feeling of discomfort stirring within him.
Slowly, he sat up and opened his eyes.
"We were heading for those energy signatures we were sent to investigate, but after about five hours we couldn't find anything discernable. And then all of a sudden they appeared out of nowhere."
The Captain placed a hand on his leg and looked at him in concern. "Who, Tom?"
It took a moment for him to answer. "The Vidiians, Captain."
Kathryn looked a bit shocked. "Our scans have not picked up any sign of Vidiians."
"It was deliberate, Captain. The energy signatures were just a trap. They wanted to lure us there."
A flash of confusion showed in the Captain's eyes. "So you think you were both their intended target?"
"I don't know," he replied. "I really don't."
There was a moment's pause.
"Captain, we have to get her back. She could be in danger and if anything happened to her-,"
The Captain cut him off with a wave of her hand.
"Don't worry, Tom," she said. "We will do everything in our power to get her back."
But the unsettling feeling within him doubted whether it would be that easy.
***
He sat in his quarters with his head in his hands.
He'd been back on Voyager for a few hours now, and there had been no further word on B'Elanna's whereabouts. It was like she had vanished into thin air, but he knew it was worse than that. A hundred scenarios ran through his head and none of them good. Mostly, he wondered if they had intended all along to kidnap B'Elanna. Had they deliberately sent out those energy signatures, knowing that Voyager was in the vicinity and likely to investigate it? If so, how would they know that B'Elanna would be sent out? Or was it just pure chance?
A surge of rage suddenly ran through Tom's veins. Never had he come across a species as vile and unforgiveable as the Vidiians. It didn't matter whether the Phage had distorted their morals; to lose their sense of being was inexcusable, and if their attitude led to B'Elanna being harmed, he would not rest until he achieved their downfall.
Tom dropped a hand and clenched and unclenched it. He knew he was thinking uncharacteristically dark thoughts, but he also knew that as far as B'Elanna was concerned, he would stop at nothing to get her back. The potential of such actions scared him just a little.
A buzzing noise alerted Tom to the fact that someone was at his door, and he reluctantly called for them to enter.
Harry stepped in.
"Hey buddy," Harry greeted tentatively. "I've come to see how you're holding up, although judging by the expression on your face, I'd say not so good."
Tom sighed. "She's gone, Harry, and until she's back I can't even begin to 'hold myself' up."
"We'll get her back, Tom," Harry implored.
"All this is my fault. If I'd gone back when she'd wanted and not hung around-,"
"Something else might have happened," Harry cut in. "You can't start with the what-ifs, Tom. It's not going to help."
"Then what do you suggest I do instead?"
"Focus, Tom. It's the only way we're going to find her."
***
When B'Elanna opened her eyes, all she could see was darkness, and all she could feel was pain. Every inch of her ached, as if someone had stuck pins all over her.
Maybe someone has, she thought, disorientated.
She didn't know where she was, or why she was here. Part of her tried to remember whether this was important. She didn't think it was.
She tried to move her arms, but found they were restrained at her sides. This struck her as odd, but she couldn't seem to fathom why they would be pinned down, and why she was stuck on some kind of biobed.
Her eyes suddenly began to grown heavy, and before she knew it, she was asleep again.
***
When she opened her eyes again, the room was a lot brighter, and realisation hit her like an asteroid on a collision course.
She wasn't on Voyager.
She was nowhere near Voyager.
Her mind didn't want to consider where she was; couldn't fathom it; but her heart could.
She was back with the Vidiians.
As if to confirm this, two Vidiians entered the room she was in, and headed towards her. Seeing this, she tried to struggle, but found that she was too weak to even try and break out of her restraints.
One of the Vidiians came to look over her; his soulless eyes and eerie face edging near hers. Her eyes widened at the sight.
The Vidiian analysed her for a moment, before turning to his colleague.
"The subject has reacted well to our experimentations," he informed him, tonelessly.
"Good," the other replied. "Sedate her. We will carry out further experimentations tomorrow."
At this news, she tried to scream in protestation, but all that came out was a muffled cry.
And then nothing.
***
She didn't know how long the cycle went on for. It could have been days or weeks. All she knew was that the Vidiians would come and they would poke and prod her, muttering phrases that she could not decipher. And then they would sedate her again, and the process would start again the next day.
She was losing her grip of reality. Having trouble trying to keep a hold of herself.
I'll get out of here, she thought.
I'll get out of here.
I'll get out of here.
And finally she thought, There is no escape from this place.
***
"B'Elanna," a voice called out to her. Once, twice and then a few times more. It took a while for B'Elanna to open her eyes.
When she did, she was greeted by the sight of a female Vidiian looking over her.
This struck her as strange, as all the Vidiians who had seen her had been male.
It took a moment before she realised that she knew this particular Vidiian.
She tried to speak, but found it hard. The only word that came out was a raspy, "Denara."
Denara gave her a small smile, and reached out for her hand that was still restrained at her side.
B'Elanna didn't understand why Denara was here or how she got here, but the look in Denara's eyes told her that she'd explain all later.
"I'm going to get you out of here," the young woman told her.
And B'Elanna finally allowed herself to hope that she would escape from here.
***
B'Elanna opened her eyes and listened.
All she could hear was silence that seemed to last forever.
And then the sound of footsteps.
The footsteps were unfamiliar to the ones she'd become accustomed to listening to. This one was softer and quicker.
The door to the room she was in opened slowly, and the footsteps came nearer.
Denara's face appeared above her.
"We must hurry," she informed her. "It is late and the guard has begun his rounds, but he will be back soon."
Denara moved over to the console by her side, and releases the cuffs that have been restraining B'Elanna, and then immediately goes over to B'Elanna and helps her sit up.
A rush of queasiness hit B'Elanna, and Denara steadied her.
"The drugs that they have given you are making you queasy and disorientated," the doctor told her, before pulling out a hypospray from her pocket and applying it to B'Elanna's neck. "This will help."
The effect was immediate, and B'Elanna found that the sickness began to ebb away.
She attempted to speak.
"Where are you taking me?" her voice was weak and unfamiliar to her ears.
Denara looked her in the eyes. "Away from this place."
***
They moved stealthily through the corridors; Denara guiding them away from any approaching guards. B'Elanna wasn't strong enough to stand up for herself and Denara had to support her.
B'Elanna immediately realised that they were not on a ship, as she had previously thought, but contained in a building. Getting out of there seemed to take forever and when they finally reached outside, the fresh air overwhelmed her with such intensity that she thought she might be sick.
She was surprised to find two women waiting for them, whom Denara quickly introduced as accomplices.
"B'Elanna, we have a long journey ahead of us. When they discover that you are missing, they will try and find us, so we must go far."
B'Elanna gave her a perceptible nod of understanding.
Denara led her into an awaiting transportation vessel, and they move on fast in the dark.
Before she knew it, B'Elanna's eyes began to droop, and yet again she fell into a deep sleep.
***
When she woke up a few hours later, she found herself in what appeared to be a cave. There were a few Vidiians taking refuge there, and many of them were women. It was strange seeing Vidiians act this way; she was used to their callous and menacing behaviour. But these Vidiians weren't like that. They appeared scared and nervous, but mainly they seemed like...people.
Instinctively, a hand goes up to her forehead, overcome with a sudden urge to make sure that she was still her. A hand counted the right amount of ridges on her forehead, and she was relieved to discover that she is still fully intact.
Denara came up to her.
"How are you feeling?" she asked.
"Better," she answers, and it's true. She still felt weak, but for the most part her head was clearer and she wasn't in as much pain, and she knew that Denara was responsible for this.
"It will take a few days for your body to recover," Denara informed her. "But the medication I gave you should dull the pain somewhat."
"Exactly what did they do to me?" She was scared to ask, but felt she had to.
The doctor looked at her with concern. "They injected you with mutated strains of the Phage, to see how your body reacted to it. They then injected you with various drugs to see whether they would help. They believed that by experimenting on you, they would find a longer lasting cure for the Phage."
"They didn't split my DNA," she stated.
"No. They know that it is your Klingon DNA that makes you resistant to the disease, and they did not have to split you for the experimentations to be more effective."
B'Elanna didn't know what to say to any of this.
Denara spoke instead. "B'Elanna, I am so sorry."
B'Elanna looked at her in confusion. "For what?"
"For them kidnapping you. It's my fault."
B'Elanna frowned, not understanding.
"When my people found out that I had helped you treat your Captain, they sent me to this M-class planet as punishment. My people have recently inhabited this planet, and plan to turn it into a base solely for their experimentations. They made me help with their research, and when they found out I knew you, they made me tell them everything I could. I'm so sorry, B'Elanna- I had no choice."
B'Elanna nodded in understanding, and urged her to go on.
"They knew that if they set out a beacon, Voyager would respond, and that you were highly likely to be one of the people who came to investigate. For a long while, my people had not been interested in you and your ability to potentially cure the Phage. But I'm afraid they've grown desperate in the last few months."
B'Elanna laughed bitterly. "I always knew they'd come back for me," she confessed. "It was always only a matter of time."
"I'm sorry," Denara said again. "I really am. When I heard they had captured you, I tried to get you out as soon as I could."
"I know. And it's not your fault."
B'Elanna sighed, and looked around.
"What exactly is this place, anyway?"
"It's a network of caves. We come here for refuge."
"Refuge from whom?"
"The scientists. Most of us are intelligent people and yet they treat us women as second-class citizens. They seem to have forgotten what it was like for us all to live in harmony, so consumed they are in their need to find a cure."
B'Elanna can't imagine what that must feel like.
"How long will you stay here?" she inquired.
Denara shrugged. "I've managed to send a message out to some friends, who are part of a resistance group, but I do not know how long it will take for them to get here."
For a moment, her expression fell and B'Elanna glimpsed the turmoil in the other woman's eyes. She knew that being on this planet and being trapped was extremely hard on her- on all of them.
"Voyager will be looking for me," she declared. "I'm certain of it. Captain Janeway won't rest until she finds me."
Nor will Tom, she thought to herself.
And she hoped this to be true.
***
Days passed by, and still they remained in the caves. There was no word from the people who were meant to be rescuing them, and morale was starting to drop.
B'Elanna's strength was better, but sometimes she found herself too weak to do much and found she had to rest. She hated being this weak and this sick, but it had to be better than being imprisoned.
She would spend her waking times talking to the other Vidiians and getting to know them. She found them to be gracious and extremely accommodating. But for the most part they were scared. As each day passed, there would be a growing sense of fear that the Vidiian scientists would find them and it scared them all. Everybody knew it was only a matter of time before they would be discovered, yet there was not much they could do to evade them. Resources were limited but they tried to make do with what they had.
When B'Elanna was not talking to the women, she would spend her time resting and thinking about Tom. Their last scene together played over and over in a head like a faulty holo-novel. It felt like they had been so close to reaching a much needed point and then this happened, interrupting the moment.
She constantly thinks about what he might have said. I'd be at the front of the queue... I'd be at the front of your queue... I'd always be at the front of the queue for you...
She hoped to get the chance to find out.
Somewhere, somehow, there was Voyager and maybe somewhere, somehow they were looking for her, and he would come for her just like he always said. And somehow, sometime, she would get the chance to tell him exactly how she felt about him.
***
Food was scarce, but they made do with what the caves out the outlying areas had to offer. They huddled together to conserve heat and spent their time keeping hope alight. But B'Elanna found this incredibly hard. She was still weak and they were all always tired. The days began to grow colder and bitterer and it was hard to believe that it would all be okay.
One day, on an exceptionally cold day, the young girl Alana came running in with a frightened expression on her face.
"They're coming!" she told the startled group. "The scientists are coming."
***
A month had passed since B'Elanna had vanished and they had had no news on her.
To say that he was in despair was an understatement. Tom was a wreck and a wretched one at that. He couldn't sleep; could barely eat and found it hard to function.
And yet he would not stop until he found her.
Every day he would start his duties and make sure Harry was always scanning the vicinity, checking for something, anything that might indicate that B'Elanna was nearby. He refused to believe that any ill had come of her; forbade Harry and Kes to even voice the thoughts, not that they would.
One day on the Bridge, he began thinking about her.
B'Elanna, wherever you are, I hope that you are okay, he thought out to her, hoping that somehow she could hear him.
Suddenly Harry's console started bleeping and everybody turned to look at him, expectantly.
Harry swallowed. "I'm picking up signs of a nearby M-class planet with life sign signatures." He turned to face the Captain. "Captain, those signatures might be Vidiian."