And here it is folks, the final chapter. I've taken a few miss-mashed liberties with the case of Johanna Beckett's murder from the show Castle and compressed it a little. For fans who watch both, it will be a little different. And like with chapter 1 and the pilot episode, some of the dialogue in this chapter is from ep 4x23. Ie: Castle's whole speech, yeah Helena totally says it:) Thank you SO much for sticking with me through this whole beast of a fic, giving me encouragements, your support, and patience, it is very appreciated. I hope you enjoy this last chapter and I hope everyone has a wonderful 2014. Happy new years folks, love you all:)

Helena watched Myka's hands shake twice as she gripped her gun. She jumped forward immediately despite the young man pointing his own gun at the two of them. "Myka –" she whispered. "you've got this." She watched as Myka steeled herself and readjusted her grip on the gun. "You got this." She repeated. Myka's hands remained steady and within a matter of minutes the young man was handcuffed and being placed into the back of Pete's car.

Pete gave them a nod as he and Claudia drove off; pointedly looking at Helena. She only waved him off and went over to Myka. She was hunched over, her hands on her knees breathing heavily. Helena had seen glimpses of this in the last day or so. No one had discussed it, but she knew that Pete and the others were aware as well. Pete would never call Myka out on it at work, and she knew that if Captain Neilsen had cleared her, Myka was good to go. But Helena had watched Myka like a hawk and while she knew Myka was capable of doing her job, she was afraid perhaps Myka didn't believe so.

Helena leaned against the car, crossed her arms and looked at the building in front of them. "How old do you suppose this is?" She asked.

Myka glanced up incredulously at her. "What?" She managed to spit out through short breaths.

"The building." Helena pointed. "How old do you think it is? Turn of the century? It's stunning."

"The –" Myka paused and tried to steady her breathing. "Why the fuck are you talking about the building?"

"Because it's lovely darling don't swear at me."

"I..." Myka took a deep breath and finally stood upright. "Helena, I just choked in there! I...there was a man pointing a gun at you, at us, and I choked. I'm a cop and I can't do the job. I – I couldn't breathe and we could have gotten shot. I..." She trailed off, unable to remain standing Myka crouched down using the car to support her.

A man frowned at them as he walked by, stepping forward to see if they needed help. "She's alright, thank you." Helena waved him off and took hold of Myka's arm. "Darling, sit down in the car and put your head between your knees." Helena opened the passenger door and pushed Myka into it, and for once, received no protest. She closed the door and walked around to the drivers seat, climbing in and opening both windows a crack to let in the fresh air despite the snow on the ground.

"I..." Myka began.

"No, concentrate on your breathing, talking won't help 'till you're calm." Helena reached forward and turned the car on, fiddling with the radio until a light instrumental song began to fill the car. "Listen to the music, close your eyes and breathe." She ordered. Myka peaked up at her, and Helena ignored her, leaning her head back into the seat and closing her own eyes. She felt Myka shift and listened intently, unmoving until she finally heard Myka's breathing even out and felt her sit up and mimic Helena's own position. "Better?" She asked. Myka nodded. Helena turned her body slightly towards Myka's. "How long has this been happening?" She asked softly.

"Since I woke up from the coma. Well no, I kinda had one then, but not really until I moved back into my place. Mostly after Pete left – since I've been alone."

"Oh darling, why didn't you tell me? I'd have moved you back into mine in a flash. Christina's been pestering me to anyway."

Myka chuckled lightly and Helena relished in seeing her smile. It happened so rarely lately.

"Because HG, I'm a grown up with an apartment of her own who needs to not have a panic attack whenever she is alone."

"You called me HG." Helena accused.

Myka looked over at her, confused. "Huh? That is your name last I checked."

"My pen name, my public name, my informal name; you've been calling me Helena ever since you woke up."

"Sorry."

"I liked it."

"Well...now you made it weird." Myka joked and pulled at her jacket sleeve. Helena only smiled and hummed along with the music.

After the song finished, Helena looked back over at Myka. "You can do it."

"What?" Myka asked.

"The job." Helena clarified. "I wasn't frightened at all today."

"Because Pete and Claudia were there, I fucking..."

"– no." Helena interrupted. "because you were there. Myka I have every confidence in you and so do your peers. The only one who thinks you are less than somehow is you."

"I..."

"Myka –" Helena reached over and took Myka's hands in her own. "You got shot and it was terrifying. It was as close to being the absolute worst case scenario your job allows. But it wasn't. You survived."

Myka was silent. Helena gave her a smile and squeezed her hands, wishing instead she could kiss her. "Now, I think it's only fair that I get to turn on the siren while I drive us back." She announced as she reached around for her seatbelt.

"Not a chance in hell are you driving my cruiser. Switch seats now." Myka ordered.

"Ah, well that sounds like the Myka Bering that I know and love." Helena joked. She climbed over into Myka's seat before Myka could really get out of it. Myka gave her a look that Helena couldn't quite decipher. "Would you like me to sit on your lap darling or are you going to get up?"

Myka scrambled out of the seat, practically falling down in her haste to get out. Helena laughed. Usually, Myka was much more graceful.

Myka sat down into the drivers seat and yanked her seatbelt on with such force that she almost slammed her hand into the wheel. Helena chose to say nothing as Myka put the car in reverse and pulled out into the street.

As the months went on, Myka's panic attacks were far and few between. She spent Christmas Eve having dinner with her father – who appeared to be more sober than she'd seen him in at least a year – and went to Helena's Christmas party afterwards. Per usual, she spent Christmas day with Pete and his mother in the afternoon and had dinner with Captain Neilsen.

At Helena's New Years Eve party as the clock struck twelve there was a split second where Myka had caught Helena's eye and leaned forward before snapping her head back quickly. Before Helena could say a thing, Pete had run over and kissed both of them full on the mouth before bounding off to kiss the rest of the entire room. Myka forced a grin and downed her champagne before dashing off to find Leena.

She had been painfully aware of the fact that Helena was in love with her, that she just might feel the same and that she had no idea what to do about it for months now. They shared moments like the one at New Years all the time. Myka would catch Helena watching her and be blown away at the look of love there before Helena immediately composed herself. That was the part Myka both hated and was immensely grateful for. Whenever Myka looked at her, she was the same old HG, her friend, her partner; it was only when she thought Myka wasn't looking that she caught glimpses of something more.

But Myka didn't have the foggiest clue what to do about those looks, so she pretended she never saw them in the first place.

0000

She completed her therapy, breathed a sigh of relief as four months passed and she hadn't had a single panic attack. She went to the firing range every night for weeks until the gun felt normal in her hands again.

Myka took the broken chain to a jeweler and put her mother's ring back on it. Now, as it brushed against her scar, she either barely noticed or smiled. The necklace had been worn so long that Myka hardly thought about it much, now, she got a little hello from her mom every time her new skin felt the cold ring.

The snow melted and life somehow didn't seem so scary anymore.

0000

Myka looked at Pete. She knew what he was going to say before he said it, and he knew it too; but he said it out loud anyway. "Myka there is nothing else it could be but connected to your mother's murder. This little punk ass thief is dead, he was trying to steel files from Jinks's computer. No one knows that he was involved in the cover ups but the four of us, Neilsen, and the people who ordered the hit on your mom. Jinks is dead. There's nothing else it could be."

Myka took a breath. "Check the vic's records and see if there is a match on one of Jinks's old cases before we jump to any other conclusions."

She walked into the break room to make herself a cup of coffee. Steve Jinks had died last year sacrificing himself in order to keep Myka alive. The men, whomever had ordered her mother's death and covered up the crimes Jinks and the other officers had committed in their vigilante form of justice had been angry that Myka had finally, finally been getting close to figuring them out. When the retired officer who had handled her mother's case, Detective Raglan, tried to confess something to Myka – and Helena – had been shot and killed right in front of them, Myka could no longer ignore it. Despite Jinks's attempts to try and keep her from finding out his involvement in it, once the sniper Hal Lockwood had escaped prison, killed the only other living man who could identify him, and threatened the lives of Jinks's husband and daughters; he had finally agreed to help them. He lured Myka and Helena to an empty airport hangar and for a split second Myka thought the man who had helped train her was going to condemn her to death. Instead, he told her that he intended to go down fighting for Myka's life. She'd pleaded with him, and screamed as Helena finally lifted her up and dragged her out to safety; apologizing and holding her the entire time the shots rang out into the night.

Myka stirred some sugar into her coffee and looked up as Helena walked over and leaned on the doorframe. "Say something reassuring." She asked.

"There are thousands of break ins in New York city every year." Helena provided. Myka let out a small smile.

"This one feels different."

"That doesn't mean it is, Jinks worked hundreds of cases any one of them could be connected. Just because this man was after his files it doesn't mean there is a connection to your mother's case."

"Then why is there a dead small time thief? Those people that killed my mother tried to kill me, Jinks had to die in order for them to stop what if this is it? I keep wondering why I'm still alive, why they haven't tried anything else yet. I...I finally felt okay again, after Jinks, after getting shot and now..." Myka trailed off and shook her head. "I don't know." She sipped her coffee, but it was too hot. Myka set it down and headed back over to her desk to work leaving Helena watching worriedly.

Helena stared at her computer screen, all of the files and information about Johanna Bering's murder in front of her. She sighed. She had been lying to Myka for the better part of a year. She'd been lying about being in love with her and she'd been lying about the information she knew of her mother's murder.

She should have learned her lesson the first time this all went to shit years ago.

After Steve Jinks had died, Helena had received a phone call. A man who wouldn't give his name other that offering to be called Mr Smith had informed her that he was taking on Jinks's role. Jinks had been blackmailed into diverting Myka from making any progress on her mother's case for years. It was the reason that Helena could pop in over four years ago and get a lead when Myka had specifically asked her not too.

That lead had lead to her almost getting shot in the middle of the precinct and Myka refusing to speak to her for nearly half a year. With all the information Helena had collected now, Myka would probably shoot her dead on the spot for lying.

Part of Helena didn't care. She would do whatever she had to in order to keep Myka safe. If that meant lying and doing her best to steer her away from attempting to solve her mother's case then so be it.

Martha walked into the room holding a cup of coffee and sighed. Helena had only told her mother about the mysterious contact forcing her to help keep Myka off the trail a few weeks ago. She hadn't taken her mother's advice of proclaiming her love to Myka when she had given it. Myka had been to fragile after she got shot, Helena could see she needed a friend so that is what she gave her. And once the mysterious "Mr Smith" had contacted her, Helena could barely stand lying as it was, she wouldn't have been able to live with herself if she and Myka had been something more.

"Things were finally getting better for her, for us." Helena said with a sigh. "She was just coming out of her shell and now this."

"Do you really think it's related to her mother's murder case?" Martha asked.

"I hope to god it's not. If they find out she's poking around her mother's murder they might try to hurt her again." Helena looked over at her mother. "I can't let that happen again."

Martha smiled softly. "I know."

0000

Helena walked into the precinct, two cups of coffee in hand and passed one over as she walked over to Myka. She looked exhausted, but gave Helena a smile anyway. "Thank you." She said and took a sip of the coffee.

"Did you get any sleep?" Helena asked, knowing the answer.

Myka didn't bother trying to lie. "Not much." She admitted.

Helena nodded and sat down next to Myka on top of the desk. "Anything new on the victim?"

"We checked all Jinks's old files, Orlando wasn't connected to any of his cases. Whatever that break in was, it wasn't personal."

Helena had been hoping she would come in and hear something entirely different. All done, case closed, nothing to see here. Instead, all points led to this being connected to Johanna Bering. She turned to Myka. "Hey, you're not in this alone." She reminded her. "I'm here."

Myka gave her a small smile and reached over and took her hand. "I know." She held Helena's gaze a moment before Pete and Claudia walked over interrupting them. Myka immediately released Helena's hand and listened as they finally gave them some good news. There had been multiple counts of gang violence in the area where Orlando Costas had been murdered, and his cousin had been arrested by Jinks. Apparently his lawyer had filed a motion for retrial a month after Jinks had been killed. Helena almost did a little happy dance.

Her joy was painfully short lived. Despite finding the cousin and interrogating him, Claudia interrupted them to show Myka the DNA Leena had managed to get from under Costas's fingernails. It wasn't a match for the cousin or anyone in the system; but it was a match for the DNA found at Jinks's shooting and the trace amounts of DNA found in Myka's apartment from her break in shortly before Jinks had been shot.

Helena watched as Myka almost crumbled in front of her. She sat down next to her on a bench while Pete and Claudia stood above them. "Does Neilsen know?" Myka asked. Pete shook his head. "Good, don't tell him, if he knows it's connected to the break in and possibly my mom's murder he'll pull me off the case."

Helena took a breath. "Maybe...maybe you should be off the case." She offered. If Myka started pursuing this...Helena couldn't let anything happen to her. "These people tried to kill you once Myka, they did kill Jinks; if you go after this...what's to stop them from trying again?"

"What's to stop them now?" Myka asked. Me. Helena wanted to answer. Only me and some idiot man I've never met. That's nothing worthwhile at all. But she only clenched her jaw as Myka stood up determinedly and walked out of the room. Helena stood and shared a worried look with Pete and Claudia.

That night Helena was pacing back and forth in her office, staring at her computer when her phone rang. "Hello?"

"I think you know why I'm calling." A deep man's voice responded. Helena recognized it as Mr Smith.

"It's you!" Helena almost yelled as she tripped over her chair. "Thank god, what the hell is going on? Why did someone break into Jinks's home?"

"Ah, most likely a cleanup job, making sure he didn't have anything incriminating in his files." Mr Smith answered casually. "As long as Myka doesn't go further with her investigation, we still hold all the cards."

"No! She's not going to let it go." Helena insisted.

"Then they will retaliate. I can't control the situation if you can't control her." He hung up without waiting for a response and Helena felt sick to her stomach.

"They must have been tapping his phone that's how they knew where Orlando was going to be. That's how they got there first but how did they know to target Orlando for the job?" Myka asked the next day. She had gone to talk to Orlando's cousin the night before and gotten him to talk to her in exchange for her dropping the charges.

"Because he was desperate for money." Helena supplied.

"Yeah, but how did they know that? How did they know his background?"

"Because they knew him from the military!" Pete offered. "He was hired by somebody he knew."

Myka almost smiled at him. "It's a place to start." She told him with a nod.

"But whoever's gotten close to that secret is dead. Maybe we're in over our heads here." Helena said pointedly.

"Hey, speak for yourself." Pete joked.

Myka frowned at Helena. It wasn't like her at all not to be totally invested in a case. Normally, she was manic, involved to the point where Myka had to tell her to cool down. Insisting the culprit was zombies or aliens or ninjas, or getting herself into situations far beyond any training she held. She had been acting different the last few days and Myka couldn't figure out what exactly it was.

Claudia walked up to them. "Orlando's financials just came in, he was totally broke. Like broke, broke, until last week when someone every so generously wired 10,000 into his account. I'd love it if someone would wire me 10,000 bucks."

"Let me guess, untraceable?" Myka asked her. Claudia nodded.

"So, it's a dead end." Helena said far too casually.

"Ah don't underestimate my skills, the deposits are, but the debt withdrawals are not." Claudia clarified. "Right when the money came in Marisol, his wife started using it to pay bills."

"Wait, if Marisol knew about the money that means she lied to us. She knew he was up to something." Myka said.

"Not only that but according to the bank she cleaned out the entire account an hour ago."

"She's on the run." Myka jumped up, Claudia and Pete hot on her heels not noticing Helena's fallen face.

They arrived to Marisol's apartment just in time to find her with bags and her ten year old son. Myka went a little too far pushing her in interrogation. She used her son going into foster care, getting caught up in gangs and dying young to get her to talk. She'd done it before, pushing criminals and associates of criminals into talking was how you did the job. But the anger boiling just under the surface, her words bitting just that much sharper than they needed too; Helena softly but firmly told her it was enough. Myka backed off and Marisol started talking.

"Orlando said it was someone he knew from the service, someone dangerous. But it was just a one off, a lot of money for an easy job. And we needed the money."

"What was the job?" Myka asked as she calmed down.

"They needed files from a dead cop's house."

"What files?" Helena asked.

"All of them, any he could find."

"This guy from the service did you get a name?" Myka asked.

"No." Marisol answered.

"Did you meet him?"

"No."

"Did he ever call the house?"

"He left notes for Orlando with a time and place. They were coded so I wouldn't know where." She said. Myka wanted to slam the table, none of this helped at all. "But I was in the car once." She added. "I saw where they met, it was in a church over on state street."

Myka let out a sigh of relief. Finally a lead. The church was in a poor neighborhood with lots of gang activity. Because of people steeling from the donation boxes, the church had put up a security camera. The priest had allowed them to take the footage. The man they were looking for showed up on the tape sitting next to Orlando Costas and Myka let out a bitter laugh. "So that's what you look like."

"We'll get it out to all the new stations..." Claudia started, but Myka stopped her.

"No, we get this picture out there and he will disappear, we gotta do this on our own."

"But Myka, we all we have is this clip, we don't have a name, DNA, we don't have anything. How are we supposed to investigate if we can't investigate?"

"Find a way." Myka ordered and walked out of the precinct and went home.

0000

She'd pulled all her old information from her mother's case out weeks ago and had a murder board up in her apartment. Only Helena knew. Myka barely ate dinner, as she poured over everything before hearing a knock on the door. She opened it and grinned as she saw Helena behind it.

"Hey come on in. I just got off the phone with Pete, our killer had a keychain and Claud did some tech stuff on the image and I dunno basically she matched it to Eastwig Car Rentals."

"That could be over a thousand cars."

"I know it's a needle in a haystack but at least it's a haystack and they keep most of their licenses on file."

"Myka..."

"I know he's probably using a fake id but we should be able to narrow it down from there –"

"MYKA!" Helena raised her voice and Myka stilled, really looking at her for the first time. Helena wasn't excited over this lead. She looked...upset.

"What's wrong?" Myka asked as she moved a little closer to Helena.

"You um...you have to stop – this investigation – you have to stop."

"Helena, we already talked about this I'm fine. I'm in control." She reassured her.

"No, you're not. They are. And if you don't stop they will kill you Myka."

Confused, Myka shifted a little and brought her hands to her hips. "What are you talking about?" She asked. She watched as Helena seemed to brace herself before speaking again.

"Before Jinks went into that hangar he sent a package to someone, someone he trusted. It contained information, damaging to the person behind all this. He was trying to protect you but it didn't arrive in time. He's friend struck a deal with them; if they left you alone the package and the information inside it would never see the light of day. The only condition was that you back off. That's the reason you're alive Myka because you stopped."

"How could you possibly know this?" Myka practically whispered.

Helena's head dropped slightly in shame. "In order for the deal to work, someone had to make sure your weren't pursuing it." She admitted.

Myka felt like the floor had dropped out from under her. Helena. The one person she truly had felt she could rely on; the one person who she was finally, finally becoming able to allow herself to be close to. The one person she trusted above almost all others, even at this point above Pete. "Are you a part of this?" She barely whispered.

Helena's eyes had already filled with tears. "I was just trying to keep you safe." She insisted.

Myka turned away from Helena and walked into the other room. She felt like she couldn't breathe, she couldn't be standing close to Helena right now. "By lying to me about the most important thing in my life?" She asked.

"I was the only thing that was protecting you!"

"HG I didn't need protection I needed a lead and you sat on it for a year!" She took a breath. She was livid, hurt, beyond betrayed, but she needed information. "Who is this person? How do I find him?"

"He's nothing Myka, he's just a voice on a phone! He calls through an untraceable number, he's a shadow in a parking lot. He's no one you can't find him."

Myka's head snapped back up. "You met with him? How do you know that what he's telling you is even the truth? How can you know that he's not involved in my mom's murder? How could you do this?" She accused.

"Because I love you." Helena choked out. Myka had never gone so still in her life. "But you already know that don't you?" She asked. "You've known for about a year. You were awake and you heard me. I was there Myka. I was there listening behind the glass when you told that man involved in the bombing case weeks ago that you remembered everything from getting shot. I know you know I love you and for a year you've said nothing about it."

Myka stalled for a moment. She had been utterly unprepared for this conversation to take place tonight. "Are you kidding me?" She choked out. "You're bringing this up now? After you tell me all of this, after you betrayed me like this?"

"Myka, listen to me..."

"Listen to you! How am I supposed to listen to you? How am I even supposed to trust anything that you say?"

"How can you trust me?" Helena asked in shock. "Because of everything we've been through together!" She yelled. "Four years I've been right here! Four years of waiting for you to just open your eyes and see that I'm right here. And I'm more than a partner." Helena took a breath and lowered her voice, tears still in her eyes. "Every morning I bring you a cup of coffee just so I can see a smile on your face. Because I think that you are the most remarkable, maddening...challenging, and frustrating person I've ever met. And I love you Myka and if that means anything to you, if you care about me at all just don't do this."

"If I care about you? HG you cut a deal for my life like I was some kind of child. My life. Mine. You don't get to decide."

"You keep going like this and they're going to decide. They're going to come for you Myka."

"Let them come." Myka spat out angrily. "They sent Coonan and he is dead. They sent Lockwood and he is dead. And I'm still here HG and I'm ready!"

"Ready for what? To die for your cause? This isn't even a murder investigation anymore Myka they've turned it into a war."

"If they want a war, then I will bring them a war. Straight to their doorsteps."

HG stared at her for a moment in silence. "Well, I guess there's nothing I can say is there?" She finally said. "Okay um...yeah, you're right Myka, it's your life. Throw it away if you want but I'm not going to stick around and watch that. So this...this is over. I'm done."

Helena walked away calmly with tears in her eyes and let herself out of the apartment. Myka let out the breath she had been holding and cried.

0000

Early the next morning, Myka found herself standing in front of her mother's grave, twirling her ring between her fingers and crying. She'd barely been able to get to sleep after HG had left. Everything with HG had hurt, more painfully that anything had hurt in a while; but there was no way in hell she wasn't going to get justice for her mother when she was this close.

She went immediately back to the precinct and met up with Pete and Claudia. The first thing Claudia asked was where HG was.

"She's off the team." Myka said curtly. "So what do we got?"

They quickly brought her up to speed on everything; they had found the rental car the man going by the name of Maddox had been using and tracked it to a one block radius in the city. Myka jumped up and told Pete to come with her, and Claudia to stay on grid.

"Woah, woah, what are you doing?" The redhead asked. "You want to do this you do it right you put a team on that car and you bring backup with you!" She insisted.

"Claud, this whole thing started because of a couple of corrupt cops. How do you know there aren't more out there? We're about an inch away from catching this guy and I'm not going to blow it by advertising our next move."

"With all due respect Myka this guy killed Jinks, almost killed you and then disappeared, you can't go into this unprepared."

"Unprepared? I've been preparing for this for thirteen years." Myka told him. She nodded to Pete and walked out of the room.

"Pete!" Claudia called after him. "Don't let her do this." She pleaded.

"It's all good Claud." He promised. "We got this." And ran after Myka.

Claudia went straight to a phone and dialed HG's number, it rang over and over with no answer.

0000

Myka and Pete got the apartment manager to let them into the room Maddox had been leasing out for the last month. They cleared the room with no sign of him.

"Myks look, Jinksy's files." Pete pointed. They both began to look through them. "What the hell were they looking for?"

Myka saw Jinks's wedding photo album. "Not what, who." She realized. She flipped through the pages quickly. "They're looking for someone he knew."

There was a blank space on one of the pages where a photo had been ripped out. "Maybe they found them." Pete said.

Myka slammed the album shut and grabbed it. "We need to get out of here. We'll call for backup and –" Someone grabbed her by the cuff of her jacket and slammed her into the wall. She fell to the ground and saw the dead apartment manager lying on the hallway floor. Pete jumped in, trying to fend Maddox off and was knocked out before he could do anything. Myka grabbed her gun and shot as Maddox ran down the hall and up the stairs to the roof. Myka immediately ran after him. No Pete, no backup, just her and her gun.

She burst onto the roof, slowly inching forward, her gun raised when he slammed into her from behind and knocked her to the ground a second time. Her gun was knocked out of her hand and Myka fought him to get to it. For as good of a fighter as she was, this man had special training and continuously knocked her down without putting much effort into it. He lifted her up with his hands around her throat and smirked, kneeing her in the stomach and slapping her face as he threw her to the ground. Myka couldn't catch her breath, every inch of her body was screaming as she wheezed and dragged herself to her knees. He bent over her, a mocking smile on his face.

"Just tell me who's behind this."

"You're wasting your time detective. You've got no idea what you're up against."

"Neither do you." Myka spat out and charged him. She managed to throw him off his balance, but he recovered quickly and pushed her. The momentum from her running start spun her over the edge of the roof and she wildly clung to whatever she could, finally managing to grasp the ledge.

Maddox walked over calmly and looked down at Myka. "Actually, we know exactly who we're up against." He said. Myka was sure he was about to push her over. She was going to die. There was no way out of this. Instead, he smirked at her condescendingly and walked away leaving her to fall on her own.

Myka desperately tried to hold on to the ledge, her grip was slipping quickly. "HELP" She screamed. And tried to pull herself up. "Not like this, come on no." One of her hands slipped and only her fingers were holding up her body weight. She could swear she heard Helena calling her. "HELENA!" She screamed. "HELP!"

"Myka hang on!"

"HELENA!" She screamed as her hand finally slipped.

"MYKA!" Claudia's hand reached out and grabbed her forearm just in the nick of time. She and two other officers hauled her up as she caught her breath.

"I thought...Helena?"

Claudia only shook her head and looked behind her. Captain Neilsen looked angry enough to push Myka back over the ledge.

Back at the precinct Captain Neilsen put both Pete and Myka on probation, took their badges and guns and yelled at them for over twenty minutes. As Myka set her badge down on the table, she thought she would be upset, but oddly, she was perfectly calm. She walked out of his office, grabbed her jacket and things and walked out of the building. She'd practically been fired, but she didn't care. All she cared about was seeing Helena. All she had thought about on that ledge had been Helena. How she had never told her that she was the most important person.

She dialed Helena's number, as she walked down the street but it was declined almost immediately. Myka hailed a cab and ran up the stairs to Helena's apartment building.

When Helena opened the door, she only frowned at her. "Myka what do you want?"

Myka wasn't going to waste anymore time. "You." She said and jumped forward, grabbing Helena's face and kissing her. "I'm so sorry Helena. I'm so sorry." She whispered in between kisses.

Helena pushed her back after a moment. "What happened?"

"He got away and I didn't care. I almost died and all I could think about was you. I just want you." She said. Myka leaned forward to kiss her again but hesitated as Helena remained unmoving. Then, blissfully, Helena grabbed her and pushed her back against the door, kissing her feverishly. "Christina? Your mom?" Myka managed to ask in between kisses as Helena had begun tugging at her clothes.

"Sleepover. Date." Helena pulled Myka into the bedroom.

When Helena woke up the next morning, she was alone. For a horrible moment she thought she had dreamt the whole thing up and then Myka walked back into her bedroom wearing nothing but a large t-shirt, a smile and carrying two coffee mugs. "Morning." She greeted her with a grin.

"I'm delighted to see it wasn't a dream."

"No, definitely not a dream." Myka laughed as she passed one of the mugs over to Helena and sat down next to her on the bed.

"Well darling, you were indeed right the first time we met, I had no idea."

"So you liked it?" Myka asked a little sheepishly.

"Yes."

"Even the part where..."

"Especially that part! I loved that."

"Me too." Myka grinned.

Helena had never been happier, but she set her cup down and looked at Myka seriously. "So, you're on board with this right? It's not some, oh I almost got fired, I almost died kind of thing?"

"Uh...no, not for me." Myka responded a little worriedly.

Helena sat up immediately and wrapped her arms around Myka. "Okay good, not for me either."

"Okay, but...I did just almost get fired and I do have the day off..."

"Hum, me too." Helena smirked and tugged a little at Myka's shirt. "What um... what would you like to do today?" She asked.

"Oh, I don't know...we could read, watch tv, get something to eat?" Myka offered as she lifted the t-shirt over her head.

"All wonderful options." Helena smiled as she pulled Myka into a kiss.