a/n: Hi there! This is chapter four of The Cool Guy. I have no part in the ownership of Kingdom Hearts. All I own is this plot. Anyway, I sincerely hope you enjoy this chapter...I think it's my longest yet...
Chapter Four
Night, day.
Light, dark.
On, off.
It is sometimes said that for every action or thing in this universe, there is an opposite. To refer to the story, we may use the example:
Normal human behavior, Roxas.
This is not to say that every action Roxas will make henceforth will be adverse to every action done by man. Only that he will be spurred on to limits that he will have never thought possible, to places that he never before would have bothered to reach.
Nor am I here to preach to you about the afore mentioned principle---however. If it were to apply not only to actions or things, we may also say:
Roxas, Axel.
The personality of Roxas, who was currently running as fast as he could back to the more crowded streets, has already been outlined.
As for the other….
It is 9:17. The night life of the city is a booming one, an explosion of dancing, talking, gambling, and worse that lasts the whole night long before drifting away like smoke until the fire of the night is lit once more. Anybody not chained to a desk or pitifully underage is prepared to walk across its hot coals.
This fire blazes through the whole city, a ring of excitement----and danger. There are those who stand on the edges of it, letting the glow from before and after warm their daily lives, content to watch and enjoy themselves without complete abandon.
Who are they watching? Who do they crowd to whisper about, to talk with, to worship from afar?
The answer is simple if you're one of those sitting at the dance club or at the hot new restaurant. It could be the person coolly watching scenarios play out with a smirk on their face.
But it's more likely to be the person watching that person. Maybe even a step further. You take another step, and you find yourself in that inner circle of people who are not walking on coals but dancing through the flames.
You only notice that their clothes are catching fire because you're not one of them. The smoke is so thick it's pitch black, but they can see perfectly, enough so that their words spark and their actions toss embers.
They are few in number and oh so popular.
Every so often one of these people, one of these dancers, is completely engulfed.
And just as often….there is one that melds with the dancing flames until they are the brightest thing burning around.
It is 9:17, and the man with the vivid red hair and grass green eyes---his name is Axel---is the brightest thing in the city.
"What are you, crazy?"
Roxas could only mutely shake his head. After his day, he really didn't need these rude assertions from strangers.
"I'm being serious. Do you have any idea where he might be?"
The man rolled his eyes. "Look---last time I saw him was at one of the many new year's parties he frequented."
Roxas frowned. "But it's summer."
"Exactly," he said, walking away.
Roxas sat down at one of the city's many benches.
"But…why doesn't anybody know where Axel is?" He asked out loud.
He was not expecting an answer.
And he was not expecting his landlord to leap out from the bushes beside the bench, rolling to his feet with amazing agility to slump down beside a stunned Roxas.
"Why the hell is a nobody like you wondering about a guy like him? Look, man, I've been searching for you everywhere. And you would not believe how hectic it is to search for someone in this goddamned place. I almost got ran over by Marly and his fucking cart of fucking flowers…you see a creepy guy with pink hair, you stay away from him, kid. Don't need you associating with him or his insane activities. The nerve of him! Suggesting that the whole "window" thing was partly my fault, when he was riding that kid's back all the time about it….you okay, kid? Didn't mean to scare ya…"
"Look. I don't know what's going on with everybody in this city…but could you tell me what you were doing…in the bushes?" Roxas said, all the while thinking that perhaps Xigbar could have told him that beforehand.
"Oh…" The landlord looked away, and if Roxas didn't know better, he'd swear that Xigbar was blushing. "Well, I was hiding."
"….right."
"From….uh…well, you don't need to know about that!" He said hastily.
"Okay…why were you looking for me?"
He leapt backwards when Xigbar snapped his fingers together and leaned forward.
"Right! You're late."
"I'm what?"
"Late. For the party. Well, you're not actually invited, it's sort of a...name only thing, you know? But so far as I can tell, anybody who's anybody is going to be there…and since you're new I thought I'd take you with me. So you could get a feel for the city. But! You're late."
"I---really? Thanks! This is great! He might be there, right?"
"He?"
"You know, Axel. I've got to find him. You see, I actually did run into Marluxia. And he hired me. Sort of. I've got to find Axel before eight. I thought I could find him just by asking around…but I must have asked thirty people and they all looked at me like I was-"
"Fucking insane!"
"Who?"
"You! I can't bloody believe this! It's only your first day….and…but why would Marly even talk to someone like you? Let alone…..I mean, I heard a rumor today, that there was a new errand boy….and it's you?"
"I…uh, well, it was Larxene, really--"
Xigbar grabbed his shoulders. "What the fuck did you do?!"
"Nothing!" Roxas yelped. If he hadn't been thoroughly alarmed before, he was now. "I didn't do anything. I just talked to her, and she sent me to him, and he told me to find Axel or I wouldn't get hired and….and you mentioned a window earlier, didn't you? You mean he wasn't kidding about that?"
"Okay, kid, there's no need to panic, as long as you didn't sign one of his fucking contracts. Tell me you didn't." Xigbar's one eye implored him.
"I-I didn't."
The landlord released him with a relieved laugh. "Then there's nothing legally binding you to him. You don't have to do it. You had me almost pissing my pants."
"But I do have to do it."
"Come again?" The landlord looked at him sharply.
"Because I want the job."
"No. You. Don't." Xigbar stressed each word.
"Actually, I do. Trust me on this," Roxas tempted fate, using the pet name he'd overheard, "…Xiggy."
"Okay. If we're gonna do this, we're gonna do it right. The city is a big place, kid. You call your great fucking outdoors big, well, you sit down right now and listen. There ain't no jungle compared to this shit, especially behind locked doors."
"We? What 'we' is this?"
"Shut up. You want my help?"
"Yes…"
"All right then. The population is always shifting. Think of it like an ocean. A really big ocean, not a sea or some shit like that. Are you following me? Okay. So think of a single person as one measly drop of water. A tiny thing inside this huge ocean. You could spend your whole life looking, probably, and never find it. That's what Axel is to you right now. Do not laugh at the example, kid. I just want you to be in the right frame of mind here."
Roxas looked around the room of the club, where the party was. If the coffee shop had looked like chic and modern…this made it look like a kid's pretend café. It was all deep oranges and reds, with a black back drop to everything, except the floor, which was a glossy wood. The room was huge, or maybe it was just that the people made it look that way.
"In the ocean, there's all kinds of fish. Nice small ones, not so nice big ones…"
There were a dozen tables scattered around the dance floor, big enough to seat five or six, but small enough to make the groups look intimate and closed. As soon as he stepped into sight, he started getting stares from a couple of them.
A young man with silver hair sipping a martini tried to catch his eye.
"Small ones will cut you up in pieces if you look away. Big ones will cut you up in pieces even if you don't."
Roxas remembered Xigbar's words and looked away, making his way towards the gyrating center of the room---the dance floor.
"Then there's sharks. You want, at all times, to stay away from sharks. I'd say Larxene is a good example."
It was a simple thing to see which people were cool. There was a veritable maelstrom of people, yes---but every storm has its center.
Out of the corner of his eye, Roxas spotted Xigbar chatting with a bear of a man with long black hair. The man who reminded him so much of a pirate threw back his head and laughed at the other's words.
He had to admit, it was very strange how much Xigbar was willing to help him out here, despite the fact that as soon as they walked into the party he'd disappeared with the crowd.
"Me? I'm…a dolphin. I'm trying to help you here, kid, but facts are facts---if a shark's got you, then I can't do anything."
Roxas felt someone's foot hook his, so he managed to keep his balance when he would have tripped. Though the erratic low lighting didn't allow him to see the perpetrator, he heard the snide snicker.
He clutched the clipboard a little tighter, but continued to make his way across the swaying dancers around him. A few times he was almost caught up in someone's dance, barely managing to force his way out.
"Don't look so scared, kid---what do you think you are? Sure, you're like…a tiny seahorse right now. But it's only your first day swimming, and already you've survived an encounter with Larxene and Marluxia. Some people don't."
The music was roaring too loud now, and Roxas knew that meant he was getting closer to his goal. Xigbar told him that if Axel was there, he'd be in the middle of everything. There'd be a solid wall of people around him, and he'd have to push his way past to get Axel to notice him.
"I don't know if you're stupid or just lucky, but…you've got this personality on ya, kid. Make sure you hold on to that. Lot of people change when they've been here a while. Course…some say it's worse to not change at all."
And then Roxas saw what he was looking for---not four feet away there was a ring of people around a single figure. Everyone there was talking animatedly, laughing every so often at something said.
Most of them were tall, towering over Roxas by a good couple of inches. The group shifted, and Roxas caught a glimpse of some of their faces---he was amazed to note that most looked like they were models.
Clear skin, defined features that weren't too sharp, eyes that were evenly spaced. Their faces were beautifully angular, with high cheek bones and firm chins.
The dominant color seemed to be black, though some were wearing so little fabric it was amazing he noticed.
"Probably the most important thing to remember is this---these people will not like you upon sight. And when they figure out what you're doing, most will resent you. You'll be like a painful little reminder that Axel is so popular he doesn't really care about what messages people may have for him. They won't realize that's why they're so angry at you, but it's true. Trust me, I know."
Roxas stood watching them for just a moment, their graceful exchanges and even more graceful movements.
He tried to fight the reminders of highschool that abounded. But there were too many. This was exactly like a school dance. These were the cool kids. And he was standing, watching, hating them because of who they were and what they stood for.
He was once more on the fringe. In highschool, he'd had no reason to try and speak to any of those horrible people. Now he had to. And he had to wonder---back in highschool---what would have happened, then? If he'd tried…to approach.
"Excuse me."
"Okay, kid---this is the door. I'm sorry I'm not good for anything but advice. Just remember what I said, and….well….you might be fine."
No one looked at him over their shoulder.
"Um…hello?"
They kept talking, but Roxas caught on to the small smiles of those that he could see.
They were ignoring him.
He walked around to the other side of the group.
"My name's Roxas. I'm new here."
Still no reply. Roxas took a deep breath. He definitely wasn't expecting them to do this. It was immature and stupid.
"Okay. I was just wondering which one of you jackasses calls yourself Axel." He said tauntingly. If they were going to be childish----well. So would he.
"Heeey, guys, why don't we just tell him?"
One of the figures stepped away from the ring of people to stand before Roxas.
"I'm Axel. So. What do you want with me?" The young man smirked, shaking his beach blonde hair back out of his face. His blue eyes danced like the reflection of water.
Roxas was taken aback. "Oh. I, uh, I have some messages for you here. So if you could just listen--"
"Dem, don't be an idiot," a girl with pale blond hair snapped. "It's not funny. When Axel asked us to do this, I think he had a nicer procedure in mind."
"Whaaat? I'm just messing around. Besides, he said 'whatever you do, don't tell the guy anything about me.' I think refusing to talk to shortie over there was the perfect plan. No offense."
"None taken," Roxas said in reflex. Then it sank in. "No, I take it back. Are you telling me that Axel isn't even here?"
"Oops. He won't like this." The blonde looked at the girl. "Great going, Namine."
Roxas looked at the now grinning group. "You…this…he already knows I'm trying to find him, doesn't he."
A redheaded man in the back of the group chuckled softly.
He was wearing dark wash jeans and a faded tee under a leather jacket. His midnight colored boots scuffed against the floor as he slunk into a more comfortable position and Roxas ignored him, looking at the blonde.
"You---Dem. Are you guys his friends, then?"
"We're a few of his friends, yeah. It's Demyx, actually."
"Right. Then you can tell him---I'll be seeing him. Before eight tomorrow morning."
"You? What makes you think he'd let you?"
It was not Demyx, but the redhead who replied. For some reason, several people choked on silent laughter when he spoke.
Enough was enough, Roxas thought.
"What makes you think…he can stop me?" He said evenly, staring the man down. He decided that he didn't like the man's self assured tone of voice… or the arrogant way he carried himself.
"There's a couple of things. I mean, besides his name---what do you know about him?"
"Nothing. And I don't care to know more than that. I've got a job to do, and I'll get it done."
"Anyone tell you yet that---that's what they all say? I've seen a lot of people try to do what you're suggesting. They are all brilliant people. And you… well, honestly, I'll probably have forgotten all about you by tomorrow."
Roxas glared at him. "Maybe you will. Doesn't mean that Axel will."
The laughter wasn't so silent anymore.
"Hey. Maybe you'll surprise him….though at this point, I'm doubting it." The redhead casually took hold of Roxas's face, tilting it upwards.
"Right now…I'd peg you as twenty, twenty-one. You're within your first month of ever living away from your small town family. You have no job. No girlfriend. No raison d'etre….until, that is, you got this shitty gig.
And normally you wouldn't even care but now you're subconsciously centered on accomplishing it. I'm guessing you always got the best grades in school, got first in whatever competition you entered---without ever trying.
So now, when your life was already in turmoil, this challenge comes up. Somewhere along the line you tied this into your emotional state and now it's so important to you that if you fail…
….you'll snap like the neurotic twig you've become. And maybe it's because of that. But mostly it's because you're starting to realize that you're a boring person who will live a boring life and nothing interesting will ever, ever happen to you."
Roxas sucked in a deep breath that he hadn't realized he'd been delaying. Each and every word had burned.
"You...let go of me," he managed. His heart was thumping a rapid tattoo against his chest.
"You…can't judge me like that," he whispered. "You don't even know me…!"
"Hey, kid? He's already gone."
Roxas looked up at Demyx. His blue eyes, though playful and somewhat amused, held mostly sympathy.
"I'm sorry. I didn't think he'd react that way. That was….way too harsh. Even for him. Heck, especially for him. But, you gotta understand, I think something happened today, or something…he was just looking for someone to take it out on. It wasn't personal at all."
"Exactly," Roxas murmured. "He knew me…judged me…but it wasn't personal. He didn't even care that he was analyzing my life! He just did it!"
Demyx watched the strange blond talk to himself, afraid that the kid was going to start crying on him. He felt bad for him. Axel had a knack for taking people apart, but that display had been ruthless. This kid—Demyx thought he had called himself Roxas-- was probably going to run home bawling and depressed, just because Axel was in a bad mood. True, everyone hated the new errand boy, but this one had been all polite and up front about it. There was something refreshing about that.
"Damn it! Damn all of it, then! You!"
Demyx jumped. "Yes?" What the hell?
"What was that guy's name? I'm going to deliver these messages to Axel, and then I'll give that bastard a message."
"Uh. Er." Demyx looked at Namine for help, but she just stared at him with terrified eyes, and no one else stepped forward. A couple stepped backward, watching.
Nothing like this had ever happened before. Errand boys tried and failed. Axel didn't even speak to half of them. The last had been different, yes, but this was unheard of. An attempt followed by psychological scarring ought to be followed directly by giving up. Not by trying again.
"The way he said it, like he was so...cool…." Roxas stiffened in mute horror at his words and gasped at the dawning realization.
"He wasn't," He uttered. A quick glance around told him, that yes, he was. Another quick glance told him that Axel had already left the party.
"Look…you were really brave, not crying and all. Any of us would have, if we'd been in your position, though none of them would openly admit it. Why don't you just give this up? You'll only get hurt. They all get hurt."
Roxas looked at Demyx. He didn't bother trying to keep his tone civil.
"You look yourself. If you people belittle me again….getting hurt isn't the worst thing in the universe. Okay? You guys are just like highschool…thinking that all anybody cares about is your opinion. I'm telling you lot now so I don't have to hear your shit again---I couldn't care less what Axel thinks about me. And I know he couldn't care less about what I think about him. I'm just a messenger. You think a few remarks are going to make me give up? It takes a hell of a lot more than that to dissuade me."
He was met with dead silence.
"I think I like this kid," Saix, a young man with long blue hair and a pale pointed face, said as the guy known as Roxas ran across the dance floor towards the exit, perfectly intent on catching that which could not be caught, and speaking what could not be said.
a/n: Thank you for reading! If you have any comments, questions, or any sort of words at all to give me, then I implore you to kindly leave a review!