8. Grief
Clarissa knew something was wrong when she answered the phone. Although she was a scientist and dealt with empirical evidence, the moment the phone rang something had just felt so wrong about the situation in ways she just couldn't describe.
"Leo's dead," Jack had spluttered out the words that neither Jack wanted to say nor Clarissa wanted to hear
She listened to him try and hold back choked sobs for a few moments before speaking "I'm sorry," she hated herself for using what felt like such a meaningless phrase but no other words seemed to do at that point in time
"There was an explosion; he was trying to save everyone…" Jack broke off once more
"Are you hurt? Is Nikki hurt?" she asked trying to ascertain as much information as she could
"We're both fine," he told her "Nikki's gone to have a lie down, to try and get some rest. She's not slept since it happened. Neither of us can sleep. It keeps going round and round in my head…"
"It's okay Jack," Clarissa said softly, recognising the rising panic in his voice
"I don't know what to do," Jack's voice had lost all his usual bravado and now sounded so hollow. His breathing was ragged, punctuated by the occasional sob and sniffing away of tears
"Bring him home," Clarissa told him "Bring them all home. You need to take care of Nikki right now Jack. I know things are hard but we need to bring them home," she told him
"I saw him die," Jack blurted out before breaking into fresh sobs and Clarissa made soft soothing noises down the phone
"You need to be strong right now Jack," she said firmly "For Nikki and for Leo. He'd want you to take care of her,"
"But what about me?" Jack asked. He sounded so lost at the present time and it was starting to scare her.
"When you get back I'll be here for you Jack like I've always been. If I could be there now then I would, you know that. But you just need to be strong for a little while longer Jack. I'll be waiting when you get back," she said softly down the phone
"Promise?"
"I promise Jack. I'll be there waiting for you when you bring our family home,"
"I want him back,"
"I know," she soothed "When it came to Leo, you were a good judge of character. I'll be here for you when you get back," she reassured him
The two of them sat in silence for a few minutes, hardly caring about the cost of the international phone call. Clarissa could hear Jack softly sobbing down the phone and Jack knew his friend would be sitting there with silent tears streaming down her face as well. Words surpassed the situation but the two friends were united in their grief. Their world had been torn apart by the death of their boss and friend but in that small silence that was delivered by a crackly phone line and punctuated by sobbing laid the very best element of friendship. Being able to support each other thousands of miles away, in a time when words give way to grief and eventually to silence.