I heard a beeping sound. I pried my eyes open only to close them against the bright light coming in through the windows. I couldn't figure out where I was and then it hit me, the hospital. No! Alice made it in time. Too much time. I couldn't believe that she didn't let me go. This was the worst thing that could have happened.
Then the pain reemerged. The agonizing pain that I thought I had escaped from returned with a vengeance and stole my breath. No. This couldn't be happening. No, no, no, no...
"No, no, no, no, no," I repeated over and over as my silent pleas became audible.
I curled myself into a ball and tried to keep myself from falling apart. What was I going to do? I would never have a chance like the one that had fallen through my fingers. I can't live with this pain. It's too much. I can't. I slowly began to rock back and forth. What am I going to do?
I heard a sound at the door and forced myself to raise my head. What I saw left me speechless.
"Carlisle?" came my raspy voice.
"Bella. How are you feeling?" His voice wasn't the usual doctor tone he had while in the hospital, instead it was filled with concern and pain and...love.
My chest erupted once again and I barely contained the cries that wanted to escape. Tears began to cloud my eyes and I was unable to hold them back. I buried my face in my knees and tried to block the pain. I could sense Carlisle had come around to the side of my bed and felt the bed dip against his weight. He gathered me in his arms and tried to sooth me.
It was all too much and sobs broke from me. I don't know how long we sat there with me sobbing and Carlisle trying to sooth me, but eventually Carlisle released me and injected something into my IV.
"Bella I'm giving you something to help you sleep. I'll be here when you wake up. Now try to relax."
I wanted to do as he said, but the pain rippling through my body kept me tense. Slowly I began to fade into sleep. I was glad to have at least a short reprieve from this anguish. If only this time I wouldn't wake up.
Please review.