Yay! I updated! this chapter has a lot of elements but its just a transitional chapter...something to fill in the gaps from before. but it DOES have some surprises up its sleeve :
i'd like to extend my thanks to Wandering-Recluse for dutifully reading this humble story and giving me constructive advice as well =) thanksss!!!
disclaim, disclaim, disclaim...(there's a mention of John Legend's Cross The Line so i disclaim that too)
Immobilized by her loss for words, Christine could only gaze empathetically at Erik who'd dropped his chopsticks and broken down into tears. His quiet sobbing and subtle shuddering wasn't enough to draw a lot of attention but it did earn their table a couple of sideward glances by nosy costumers. When Christine got the feeling back in her arms and fingers, she timidly reached out a hand to cover Erik's. It wasn't the reaction she was counting on when he suddenly jerked away from her grasp.
Now, questions were running through her mind as her curiosity and concern peaked up. He didn't fully explain why his parents broke up nor did he elaborate much on what had happened after. But knowing that it must have been difficult to unearth hidden memories and emotions, Christine decided that she couldn't just bombard him with questions. That's why she forgave him for rejecting her hand.
Sensing that Erik's tears had slowed down and his eyes began to clear up, Christine risked asking a question. "C-Can I ask a question?"
"I don't suppose why not." Erik replied quietly as he sniffed away the last of his tears.
"Why exactly did your parents file for a divorce? It seemed like your family had the perfect life; you had everything. I don't understand."
"We had everything and nothing. We were rich but money wasn't enough to fill the gaps in our hearts—especially mine and my mother's. All my childhood I'd wanted my father's attention. My mother had given me enough; she had showered me with love and care hoping that what she was doing was enough to substitute my father's indifference towards me." Erik looked up at Christine with pain-filled eyes. "I hate him, Christine. I hate him for killing my mother. I hate him for giving me this fucking face. I hate him for being my father!"
Christine had never heard Erik swear before and she knew that his father's memory was bringing out his pent up rage and anger that he had tried to keep hidden with his gentlemanliness and eloquence. She was seeing a deeper side of Erik, the one that explain all facets of him. Despite the awkward situation and the intense heat radiating from Erik's body, Christine couldn't help but think she loved him more this moment than any other because of it.
They ate the rest of their food in silence because Christine hadn't dared to ask another question. With all of Erik's hatred for his father, she understood that he was capable of doing anything under the heavy influence of his temper. Erik called for the check and handed a large bill to the waiter.
"Keep the change." Erik muttered as he stood up, avoiding Christine's eyes. Suddenly, she got paranoid that he was angry with her.
Erik still opened the car door for Christine and then he slid into his own. He revved up the engine and allowed it to warm up a little bit although he was gripping the steering wheel rather tightly. The silence between them was different now. It was still the heavy air that seemed to be anticipating something huge to happen but at the same time, it was the kind of silence that meant nothing should be said; nothing should be done.
"Are you mad at me?" Christine asked so quietly that she thought he didn't hear her at all but then Erik's white-knuckled hands relaxed and eventually let go. He looked at Christine with his calculating, green eyes and she felt as if he were her high school teacher reprimanding her for turning in a late assignment. But then after a moment, his eyes had softened as well.
"I don't lose control, Christine."
She didn't reply.
"It's just that, with you, I feel as if I have no boundaries, no limitations. I feel as if even my mask cannot detain me from the rushing emotions I feel inside as I look at you, smell your hair, and kiss your lips."
"Erik—,"
"And I'm afraid of that, Christine. If I lose my self-control, that façade I use to mask the bitterness I feel, I might just explode into tiny pieces and—I don't want you to get hurt. You're the first person to show me what it feels like to be loved in a long time that I've forgotten what to do, almost. Christine, will you do something for me?"
"Anything,"
"Will you promise me? Promise me that you won't leave me? I-I literally don't know what I would do if I would lose you." Erik's voice was small—not his usual confident tenor that was stringed together with his rhythmic accent. This was the Erik that was a little boy 17 years ago: the timid, reluctant, and shy boy that clung to his mother's skirt. A boy destined for greatness in the arts but was instead pushed into the gorge of a rushing river of anguish and brokenness.
"You have me already, Erik." It was all that Christine had to say. Both of them knew that their eye contact was enough to communicate their bond with each other. Words were not necessary but Erik just wanted to hear it out loud.
They leaned into each other and gently brushed their lips together once. Any more and Erik would lose his control entirely.
"Look at us," Erik chuckled as he broke away. "Two lovers caught in the tragic comedy of love."
"No, I think that we both are just really messed up."
-oOo-
They drove the rest of the way to Christine's apartment in silence but Erik had switched the radio on to ease the anxiety of what had just happened. The radio station played RnB and light rock songs and Erik found himself humming along to the music with Christine singing quietly along. Soon, they started singing together even if Erik didn't know all of the lyrics to the songs which got Christine laughing again.
"Tonight's the night, to cross the border—," Erik sang along to John Legend's Cross the Line
"Erik! It's line! Cross the line!" Christine laughed.
"Oh, whatever. I don't even like these kinds of songs."
"And yet you find yourself singing along with them. Baby won't you be mine," Christine said before closing her eyes and getting lost in the music
"Well, only because I know you like them." Erik glanced at Christine and flashed a half-smile.
"Over-pleaser." Christine made a face at Erik.
"Shorty."
"Car-gifting maintenance guy."
Erik laughed. "Okay, okay, enough! Before you bruise my ego!" They turned into her street and Erik expertly parked near the curb.
"Meg home?"
"No, she told me before she left the hospital that she's going to stay Raoul's tonight."
"Funny, I'd figure her to be all protective of you now that you're out of the hospital," Erik looked out of the windshield, pondering over his thoughts.
"Well, I-I sort of asked her to stay at Raoul's tonight," Christine said in a quiet voice.
Erik looked back at Christine and reveled at how young she looked sitting in the passenger's seat with the soft moonlight accentuating her brilliantly brown, innocent eyes. He sighed softly.
"I thought we'd been through this before."
"Yeah, I know! But I asked her way before I confronted you in the hospital. I didn't think that you'd say…no. Well, you can leave if you want to. I'm sure I'll be fine all by myself."
Erik knew that she was playing the reverse psychology card and it was working its magic into his worrisome heart. There was good reason for him to stay for the night: he wanted to make sure that Christine was okay. He kept telling himself that this was the reason why he wanted to stay.
"Be serious, Christine." Erik sighed in defeat as Christine looked at him with puppy dog eyes. "Okay fine, I'll stay for the night. But just tonight. Okay? After tonight, you better call Meg to come over."
Christine smiled triumphantly. "Mmh, you say that now." With that, she unbuckled herself and stepped out of the car, on her way to the backside to retrieve her suitcases. Erik followed suit and popped the trunk. He carried the heavy baggage and Christine slung her backpack over her shoulder. Hand-in-hand, they hurried into the apartment building as the nightly temperature began to decrease. They were greeted by a rush of warm air when they got inside then they made their way to the elevator where Christine pushed the button that led to the fifth floor. The elevator doors close.
"No funny business, you hear?." Erik retorted.
"None at all." Christine replied with a devilish smile and Erik panicked about what tricks she might have up her sleeve. Just then, she pressed herself up against Erik's right side and placed a light kiss on a particular spot on Erik's throat that caused a barely audible grumble to sound out of his chest. He couldn't help himself for his primal reactions but suddenly his jeans began to tighten as Christine grazed the very tip of her tongue along the erogenous zone of his neck. He nearly dropped the heavy duffle bag that he was carrying in the urge of pushing Christine against the elevator wall and taking her then.
Luckily for him, the elevator rumbled to a stop and Christine pulled away to resume her inconspicuous position near the wall as the doors opened. He still had a big problem though. Standing in front of him was an elderly woman whose eyes widened beyond her thick glasses as she stared openly at his mask and—his big problem. Erik chuckled uneasily and covered his jeans with the duffle bag.
"Good evening, Mrs. Robertson." Christine said with an easy smile. She made her way through the threshold of the elevator and looked at Erik expectantly.
"Well, aren't you coming along, Erik?"
"Uh, good evening, Mrs. Robertson. Excuse me." The old lady was standing in his way so he dragged his back along the wall so that he wouldn't have to touch Mrs. Robertson with—anything. Then he followed Christine to her door, afraid to look back at the woman who might've had a heart attack in the elevator for all he knew.
"Christine, you could've given that poor woman a heart attack! What's gotten into you?" Erik whispered vehemently at Christine as she worked to unlock her apartment door. She didn't say anything but opened the door instead and stepped inside, disappearing in the darkness. Erik followed her and closed the door while dropping the duffle bag near the door. Christine still hadn't switched the lights on so Erik squinted helplessly and raised his hands up in the efforts of finding his way around the apartment.
"Christine? What are you up to? Where are you?" Erik called out in the darkness, stumbling over a coffee table in the process of walking around blindly.
"Ouch," Erik said under his breath while massaging his right shin.
A pair of soft hands grasped Erik's rough ones and he felt her lips caress his fingertips.
"Hey," She whispered. Apparently she can see in the dark, Erik thought.
"Chris—,"
"Shhh. Come with me." Christine wrapped her hand around Erik's and led him into a hallway that had led to her bedroom. There, she'd switched on a small tungsten lamp on the side table of the bed that gave off a warm yellow light. When Erik's eyes adjusted, he surveyed the room. There was a wide window covered with purple blinds on the far wall in front of him. A medium sized bed occupied most of the space and beside the window was a wardrobe. There was a door on the right that Erik perceived led to a bathroom.
Christine was removing her shoes when Erik moved to the center of the room, watching her every move, making sure that she didn't pounce on him. She was acting too unpredictably for her own good. He began to relax until his jeans that had already loosened began to tighten again as Christine did the unthinkable.
She turned to face him with her brown eyes dead-set on his. Her lips were slightly parted and moist as she began to remove her blouse. She tossed it to the side and Erik gulped as he couldn't resist ogling over her perfect body. Her light green bra cupped her breasts perfectly. They weren't small but weren't too big either, just right for a handful. Her form was lithe and her abdomen was flat probably because of her stay at the hospital but either way, Erik nearly groaned as his eyes floated downwards to her jeans which she was beginning to unbutton.
He couldn't find the strength to move. Today had been a long day; how had things happen so fast? Erik thought. He was paralyzed to the edge of the bed—how had he gotten there?—as Christine slowly pulled her jeans down to reveal long, pale-white legs. Her underwear matched her bra and hugged her low hips. She pushed her jeans aside too and finally looked up at Erik who was still fully clothed. She bit her lip as she held Erik's shoulders and pushed away his jacket. Then Erik finally found his voice.
"Christine, stop. Wh-what are you doing?" Erik rasped out, his lips so near to Christine's.
"Please. Let me do this for you." Christine whispered back as she gently nudged Erik to sit down on the bed. She swiftly removed his leather jacket as she kissed his forehead. Her hair cascaded down and framed Erik's face. He breathed in her hair and to his surprise, his jeans tightened even more. Suddenly, the pressure was just too much. His eyes shot open and he wrapped his arm around Christine's waist. He flipped her over on the bed and kissed her passionately. She moaned as he was finally giving in to what she wanted but then, as she wrapped her legs around his thighs, he broke away and gasped.
"Wait! We can't do this! Christine, I told you. This isn't safe for you. Please, don't force me; I don't want to hurt you." Erik began to pull away but Christine gripped the front of his polo.
"No, Christine. We can't do this now. Can't you understand?" Erik pleaded with his eyes as he stared down who he thought was the most beautiful woman in the world. His heart almost exploded as he heard Christine say her next few words both with her voice and body.
"Erik, I want you to make love to me."
sorry but i really had to cut it short! i'm sorry but i really couldn't resist a bomb cliffhanger =D don't hunt me down and shoot me because i KNOW this is worthy of a review. i didn't want to jump right into the goods because it can't be something that just happens. we got to ease into it ok? =) please hit that green button! please! =) hope you liked this chapter =)