Feel This Chapter 4: I Wonder, a high school musical fanfic

Disclaimer I do not own High School Musical or any of its characters.

A/N: I'm so it's been a while. I've had the worst writers block. Hopefully it's ok. Enjoy…

Last Time…

"I have to finish putting these books away" she said.

"What time do you finish here?" Troy asked.

"7" Gabriella answered. Troy looked down at his watch; it had just turned 7 now.

"It's 7 now. I'll go pay for this then I could drive you home" Troy offered.

Gabriella froze, how was she supposed to deny this offer?

Chapter Four – I Wonder

"I actually will probably be staying a little later, I have to, um, put these books away before I leave. So you don't have to" Gabriella lied.

"Oh" Troy said dejectedly. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Yeah" Gabriella said softly. Troy nodded slowly, handing her back the box of books.

"Bye Brie" he whispered, as he turned around to begin to walk to the cash register.

"Troy" Gabriella said, grabbing his attention. He turned his head back to look at her. "I really wish you could take me home, I really do and I hope you know that" Troy smiled slightly and nodded, before he turned around and walked to the cash register.

Gabriella sighed as she watched Troy leave. It hurt her, lying to him like this. But she couldn't risk him knowing. Inhaling, she walked to the next bookshelf to continue putting books away.

After Troy had paid for the book, he made his way out of the book store feeling confused most of all. He believed that Gabriella would stay to put away the books, but what he didn't believe was that, that was her original intention. He was sure there was something that he was missing, something she was keeping from him. He promised himself that he would find out what it was.

The next day, Gabriella entered East High, with a pain in her heart that only grew stronger on this day. Today was the day her mother left them, 7 years ago. She remembered it with perfect clarity. She could still hear the front slamming as her mother walked out of the house. She could remember the sound of her father smashing his fist into the wall. She winced at the thought of the first time her father came upstairs to beat her. She could hear his voice screaming at her, telling her it was her fault. His harsh words rang over and over in her head, "It's your fucking fault, your mother left! It's all on your shoulders! Do you understand me?"

It was on that day that her life changed forever and she began to carry around debts that would never be lifted from her shoulders. Gabriella fought back tears as she walked through the hallways of East High, not really paying attention to where she was headed. Soon, it became too much for Gabriella to handle, her father's cruel words were ringing louder than ever in her head. She grabbed the handle of the nearest door and escaped into the tranquility of the classroom.

Closing the door behind her, Gabriella slid slowly down the back of the door, tears beginning to flow from her eyes. She let out a heartbreaking sob as the pain in her heart grew stronger, as the wounds from her childhood opened up again. She ran her fingers through her hair, trying to calm the waterfall of tears that continued to fall from her eyes.

As the tears began to slow, she looked around the room to see where she was. In front of her was a grand piano, there were a great assortment of other instruments, but Gabriella's eyes could not be drawn away from the piano. On this day, 7 years ago, she sang for the last time. She used to sing all the time; it used to be her favorite thing to do.

Wiping away some tears, Gabriella slowly stood up and made her way over to the piano. Gingerly, she let her fingers skim over the cool wood of the piano. Arriving at the keys she let her hands run silently over the black and white keys. Slowly, she lowered herself onto the bench that was placed just in front of the piano. Placing her hands carefully on the keys she pressed down gently and melodic tone of the piano filled the room.

Gabriella pressed the keys again and let the beginning of a melody fill the room. Closing her eyes, she let the tune fill her, reach deep down into the deepest wounds her heart and she began to sing.

Sometimes I think about you
Wonder if you're out there somewhere thinkin' 'bout me

Her voice was timid and soft, but the words that she was conveying were strong and powerful.

And would you even recognize the woman that your little girl has grown up to be
'Cause I look in the mirror and all I see are your brown eyes lookin' back at me
They're the only thing you ever gave to me at all

She closed her eyes and as she pictured her mother's face tears leaked out of her them.

Kelsi and Taylor walked down the hallway together, chatting loudly, so they could hear each other over the other conversations of students in the same hallway.

"I seriously cannot believe how much homework Porter gave us last night, it took me forever." Taylor said exasperatedly.

"I know, tell me about it. I was-" Kelsi suddenly cocked her head to one side.

"Kelsi?"

"Shhh. Listen" Kelsi said quietly, holding up her finger.

Sometimes I think about you
Wonder if you're out there somewhere thinkin' 'bout me

The voice floated through the air very faintly and Taylor and Kelsi looked at each other curiously. Kelsi motioned her head for Taylor to follow. The girls followed the voice down the hallway a bit, until they came to the music room.

They peered inside glass of the door and watched as a dark-haired girl played the piano, effortlessly. Her head was bowed and turned slightly away from them, so they couldn't make out who it was. But once the girl turned slightly, both Taylor and Kelsi gasped.

"Oh. My. God." Taylor said slowly. "That's Gabriella."

"It is" Kelsi confirmed.

"That girl can sing" Taylor noted.

"Yeah and she's playing" Kelsi pointed out.

"Who are you guys spying on?" Sharpay suddenly demanded, coming up behind the girls.

"Jeez, Sharpay, warning would be nice, before you almost caused us both heart attacks." Taylor said, holding her hand over her heart, Kelsi nodded in agreement.

"Sorry, but who's that singing, whoever it is they're really good."

"Take a look" Kelsi whispered, moving away from the door so that Sharpay could take a look.

Sharpay whipped her head around with an overly dramatic look of shock on her face.

"Gabriella! We need this girl in our musicals! She's fantastic!" Sharpay exclaimed. "Let's go talk to her!"

"No, wait. Listen. She's not singing out of joy, she's singing out of pain" Kelsi said softly.

I think about how it ain't fair that you weren't there to braid my hair like mothers do
You aren't around to cheer me on
Help me dress for my high school prom like mother's do

Gabriella felt tears continue to run down her face, revealing the true depth of her pain.

Did you think I didn't need you here to hold my hand, to dry my tears
Did you even miss me through the years at all?

"Her mom died?" Sharpay asked. Kelsi shook her head,

"I don't think so"

"You don't think…" Taylor trailed off as they could hear Gabriella's singing getting louder and more passionate.

Forgiveness is such a simple word
But it's so hard to do

Unable to contain her emotions anymore, Gabriella could only manage to whisper the next line of the song, through a strong current of tears.

When you've been hurt

Gabriella's head collapsed into her hands. She placed one of her hands over her heart, as if she was trying to prevent her heart from falling out, while she let out a loud painful sob. Her breathing was uneven and shaking as her chest rose and fell violently. After all these years her mother leaving still hurt Gabriella as much as it did the night she left.

Kelsi, Taylor and Sharpay watched in agony as Gabriella cried at the piano.

"Why didn't she tell us?" Sharpay asked, turning away from the scene.

"It's not something you just blurt out to people. It's probably hard for her to tell people" Kelsi pointed out.

"So what do we do now?" Taylor asked. The two other girls shook their heads,

"I have no idea" Kelsi whispered.

Just then the warning bell sounded, ringing loudly throughout the school. Kelsi, Sharpay and Taylor quickly moved back down the hallway, so that Gabriella wouldn't see that they had been watching.

Gabriella sat up straight at the piano suddenly. She frantically tried to wipe away her hot tears and calm herself down. After the tears stopped and were all wiped away, she straightened her clothes and ran her fingers through her hair quickly.

Taking a deep breath Gabriella stood up and walked to the door, opening it, she walked through back into the noisy hallway of reality.

She managed to move through the hallways without anyone noticing her. She arrived at her homeroom quickly and took her seat in the back. Just as she slid down into her seat Troy and his basketball buddies walked into homeroom.

When Troy locked eyes with Gabriella it became obvious to him that she had been crying. Her face was pale and she had faint red patches around her eyes which were signs that she had been crying. She looked down, focusing her attention on her planner in front of her.

Troy's promise to himself of finding out what was going on with Gabriella was looking like it was going to be more confusing and harder than he had expected. She was hiding some deep feelings that Troy figured weren't going to come out easily.

It just so happened that both Troy and Gabriella had free period 3rd period. Just as 3rd period was beginning Gabriella stood at her locker, putting away her books. Satisfied that she was finished she shut her locker, only to find Troy leaning against the locker next to hers. She jumped slightly as he had been hidden by the locker door, but she managed to smile.

"I missed you at your locker this morning" Troy said.

"I guess I was a little distracted this morning, I never actually went to my locker. Sorry about that" Gabriella explained as the pair began to walk down the hallway.

"I want to show you something" Troy said, "Come with me" he grasped Gabriella's hand in his and led her through the halls, until they reached a door at the end of a hallway. Troy looked around to make sure no one was watching and then opened the door and pulled Gabriella in. Panicking slightly, Gabriella pulled back a little bit,

"What are you doing?" she asked her voice full of terror. Troy looked her genuinely in the eyes,

"Just trust me, I promise you'll like it" He squeezed her hand gently. Gabriella closed her eyes and followed Troy up the stairs. As they ascended the stairs the pair came to a beautiful rooftop filled with plants and flowers. Gabriella looked around in awe,

"It's so beautiful" Gabriella whispered. "How did you find this?"

"Let's just say it's a special Bolton family secret. I come up here when I need to think or just to relax. Feel free to use it whenever you need" he explained. Gabriella smiled,

"Thank you Troy." Gabriella walked to the small bench on one side of the rooftop and took a seat. She closed her eyes gently as the soft breeze swept past her. When she opened her eyes Troy sat next to her with a small flower in his hand.

"Do you know what type of flower this is?" he asked gently. Gabriella shook her head, she had seen the small pink flower before but did not know its name.

"It's a freesia. It's symbolizes trust. I want to you know that you have my trust and I hope that I have yours." Troy explained. "I think we should play a game. Since there are 6 petals, each of us gets to ask the other person three questions"

Gabriella nodded, "You go first"

"What's your favorite thing about Albuquerque?" Troy asked.

"School" Gabriella said simply.

"Why is that?"

"Because as much as I like being at home, I'm not as busy at school as I am at home." She explained. Troy hadn't expected that answer; usually it was the other way around for people. Home was supposed to be somewhere to relax.

"That counted as two you know" Gabriella reminded him.

"What?" Troy asked incredulously.

Gabriella smiled, "I'm kidding, that can be one. My turn."

"Tell me something no one knows about you."

Troy thought for a moment before answering the question, "I can sing" he said. Gabriella grinned.

"Basketball captain and singer, don't tell me you're an amazing cook as well"

"Just peanut butter and jelly sandwiches" Gabriella laughed.

"Why did you move here?" Troy asked.

"I didn't have a choice" she answered simply.

"Why does no one know you can sing?" She asked. Troy was taken back by her question, he had never really thought about the answer.

"Um, I guess it never came up" Troy said. Gabriella raised her eyebrow. "Ok, I guess people have always known me as the basketball guy, not the singing guy. I don't think they would let me do both" Troy explained.

"It's not whether they would let you, it's whether you want to" Gabriella whispered.

"Since you've been asking me hard questions, here's a harder one for you. What's you greatest regret?"

Gabriella leaned back on the bench, trying to think of her answer. There was only one answer that came to mind, and she didn't really want to say it, but the way Troy was looking at her didn't leave her a choice,

"Not being good enough" she whispered sadly. Troy watched Gabriella carefully as an intense pain burned in her eyes; he couldn't help but feel this heart break.

"Brie" Troy whispered slowly. Gabriella looked up at him, trying to fake a smile. She changed the subject immediately.

"It's my turn, if you had only one day left to live, what would you do?"

"I would spend it with the people I love most, laughing with them, having the time of my life" Troy explained simply. Gabriella smiled,

"I would do the same thing" she said softly. Troy grinned and held out the flower out for Gabriella to take,

"For you" he said. Gabriella fingered the delicate flower in her hands before deciding she wanted it in her hair. Breaking off most of the stem, she began to try and put it near her ear. Seeing that she was having difficulty, Troy took the flower from her fingers,

"Allow me" he whispered. Troy moved closer to Gabriella and tucked the flower just above Gabriella's ear in her thick, dark curls. Satisfied that the flower was placed correctly Troy let his hand brush a strand of hair that had fallen, covering part of her face, out of the way. Looking up at him, Gabriella smiled softly. Troy gazed down at her as he slowly started to move his face closer to hers.

Just as Troy's face was inches away from Gabriella's the bell rang loudly. Gabriella removed her gaze from Troy's, looking down at the tiled floor. She stood up, grabbing her books and turned to Troy,

"I have to run, I'll see you during lunch, but thank you." She said. Troy nodded as he watched Gabriella descend the stairs.

Stupid Bell.

A/N: So….what did you think? Once again, I have no idea when I'll update again, I'll try to make it soon, but since the school year has started my life is unpredictable. Please Review! Thanks for reading!

The song I used was I Wonder by Kellie Pickler. I changed it a little bit and omitted the choruses, but you should listen to it, it's such a heartfelt, beautiful song. I'll put a link in my profile.