Living World
Ichigo released a sigh as the eyed the shop with something akin to dread. Not that he was afraid of Kisuke per se… just a little… uh… discomfited. Taking a deep breath he shored up his courage and crossed the threshold. He could do this. He reached for the door and … hesitated… maybe… he couldn't do this… Ichigo stared at the door for a long, long, long time. One the hand, Kisuke was in there. On the other, he promised to talk to him… but either way you slice it Kisuke was in there… Not that he was scared to see him or anything. It's not like he couldn't take the man… unless… he played dirty… Ichigo seriously considered turning back. Even his inner hollow was on the fence when it came to the eccentric shop owner. Ichigo lost his chance to escape when the door opened to reveal Kisuke casually fanning himself.
"Good morning I-chi-go." Kisuke smirked at him.
"…uh hi…" Ichigo coughed and tried to collect himself. "Um… listen I kinda… need a favor…" He mumbled rubbing the back of his neck nervously.
"All you have to do is ask…" Kisuke said sliding dangerously closer.
Ichigo gulped but managed to stand his ground. "Uh… well… you know that new Captain… her whole squad has some kind of strange mission to get Yumichika and Ikkaku together and… well… they kind of…"
"I see." Kisuke stroked his chin thoughtfully. "How to get Ikkaku to admit his feelings. Challenging."
"Yeah." Ichigo said feeling totally awkward.
Kisuke's eyes wandered back to the fidgety young man. "Of course, I never work for free."
Ichigo froze in his retreat. He was officially in trouble. Kisuke smirked as he advanced on the substitute soul reaper.
Living World across town
"Would you hold still?" Yumichika snarled at the retreating hollow.
"Well, you can't say they didn't give us a more challenging mission." Uryu commented from his place on the sidelines.
"The hangover doesn't help." Captain Tsunami replied dryly.
"I think that was our personal best." Uryu replied rubbing his temples.
"Yumichika too." Captain Tsunami said watching him dispatch the hollow.
"Now we can leave-" Yumichika began when their cellphones all pinged.
"So much for that." They muttered heading out to deal with the new threat.
A few miles away
Rukia rolled out from behind Orihime's shield and sliced through the hollow's mask.
"Thank goodness." Orihime said scrubbing her eyes.
"If that thing screamed one more time my head would explode." Rukia said through clenched teeth.
"I don't think we should go drinking anymore." Orihime confided as they stepped through the gateway.
"I think that's the best idea you've had yet." Rukia said seriously making a beeline for Division 4. "I hope Hanataro isn't on assignment."
Living World
"Hey, Uryu." Captain Tsunami called.
"Yes?" Uryu asked firing rapid shots.
"When did Ichi-chan get here?" Captain Tsunami asked deflecting a blow.
"I came from Kisuke's." Ichigo snarled offing another hollow.
"Is he in?" Yumichika grunted with the force of the blow.
"Yeah." Ichigo lobbed off the hollow's arm.
Division 5
"If I didn't know better I'd think Kuchiki told them we were coming." Kari muttered.
"I don't put anything past that man." Yumichika growled darkly.
"It's certainly one hell of a coincidence." Uryu's eyes flashed behind his glasses.
"Run into some trouble?" Kenpachi grinned manically.
The three spun around leveling their weapons at him.
"Not really a good time, Kenpachi." Ichigo said grimly.
"Oh?" Kenpachi's grin widened.
"You missed out." Yumichika told him sheathing his blade. "We ran through a whole swarm of hollows."
Uryu and Kari grabbed Ichigo and left the former teammates to compare notes.
"So when does Urahara set his plan into motion?" Kari asked as they hustled him over to the squad barracks.
"It's already in motion." Ichigo scowled scrubbing his face.
"So now we just sit back and watch?" Uryu asked cleaning his glasses.
"Kisuke said to tell you to enjoy." Ichigo muttered.
"Been visiting your boyfriend Ichigo?" Renji snickered wrapping an arm around Uryu.
Ichigo turn red and scowled thunderously. "Like you got room to talk!"
Division 11
"Good morning, Chad!" Orihime called waving enthusiastically.
"Morning, Orihime." Chad answered.
"Do you like your new squad?" Orihime asked happy to see him.
"It's fine."
"I really like our new squad!" Orihime continued enthusiastically. "Rukia and I get to go pick all our new seats after the lock down."
"That's nice." Chad said listening attentively. "Do you want to go for tea?"
"That would be great!" Orihime cheered latching onto the silent man's arm. "There is a really nice shop that sells chocolate and the tea is really good too!"
"Okay." Chad followed her lead.
Living World
Kisuke prowled around his lab with a self-satisfied smirk. Playing with the substitute was quickly becoming his favorite pastime. Especially, when Ichigo blushed like that. His eyes gleamed wickedly. The boy was making it too easy for him. Not that he was complaining…
Chocolate shop
Ichigo got a sudden chill. Looking around quickly, he shrugged off his paranoia.
"These are the best cookies." Kari said chewing happily.
"They certainly are addictive." Uryu polished off his glass of milk and ordered another.
"Chocolate is the heart of seductive beauty." Yumichika sighed dreamily.
Ichigo choked on his cookie. "When did you get here?"
"We've been here." Kenpachi answered stealing Kari's cookie.
Kari stared at her empty hand for a long moment. "Uryu…"
"Captain?" Uryu accepted a new glass of milk.
"Loan me your glove." Kari said eying the cookie thief.
"You're not serious." Ichigo said in disbelief. "You're not actually gonna challenge Kenpachi."
"He stole my cookie." Kari said darkly.
"It's just one cookie, there's a whole plate here." Ichigo argued.
"Shut up, Ichigo!" Renji scowled at him. "I want to see that new shikai release."
"Eh?" Ichigo looked around confused.
"Just one? I have four." Kari rolled her eyes stealing a cookie.
There was a round of coughing and hacking around the table.
"F-f-four?" Uryu wheezed eyes wide.
Renji, Yumichika, and Ichigo stared in open-mouthed shock. Even Kenpachi looked a little impressed.
"You think they made me Captain for my looks?" Kari asked enjoying their shocked looks.
"You can't be serious." Renji said eyes like saucers.
"Sure I am. You think they let just anyone have a Quincy Lieutenant?" Kari stole Kenpachi's cookie. "Sweet revenge!"
Squad 11
"Where the hell is everybody?" Ikkaku growled prowling through the division.
"Did you check squad 5?" Orihime asked walking in with Chad.
"I felt Ichigo's spiritual pressure when we were at the tea shop." Chad added helpfully.
"If Ichigo's there then Captain probably is too…" Ikkaku trailed off wondering what his captain was doing in a tea shop.
"Ichigo was talking to Captain and Uryu last time I saw him." Orihime said thoughtfully. "Yumichika was standing with them so maybe they're all together."
"We can help you look." Chad offered.
"Heh. Let's go then." Ikkaku said walking toward the exit.
Living World
Kisuke stretched working the kinks out of his muscles. Finally, all the bugs had been worked out and it was time to implement his plan. Leaning forward he quickly typed in the activation code. Operation IkkaYumi is now underway. He grinned evilly. Now how to lure his favorite substitute soul reaper back to the shop… He tapped on a few keys bringing up the specs for Ichigo's converter bracelet. Now, if he just modulated correctly it should…
Chocolate shop
"The hell?" Ichigo brought the vibrating bracelet up to eye level.
"You better get that checked out." Uryu frowned.
"Yeah, if it quit working…" Renji left it up to his imagination to fill in the blanks.
"Damn." Kenpachi grumbled since he couldn't fight Ichigo now.
"I guess I have to run back to Urahara's and get it fixed." Ichigo scowled waving goodbye.
"Yumichika…" Kari said looking at something behind him. "Did you know there's a banner with your name on it over there?"
"Huh?" Yumichika turned to see a huge banner with the worlds 'Ikkaku' a giant heart 'Yumichika forever' painted on it.
"Operation IkkaYumi is now underway." Kari, Uryu, and Renji said in unison.
"WHAT THE HELL?" Ikkaku shouted making everyone turn to look at him.
Uryu elbowed Renji giving him a look that clearly stated 'do something'.
"Ikkaku," Renji said clapping him on the shoulder. "I was starting to think you didn't have the guts to confess."
Ikkaku opened his mouth to protest, but Yumichika wisely chose that moment to latch onto his arm.
"It's all so magical." Kari said with a teasing edge in her voice.
"Captain." Uryu motioned her over to the window. "You can't say he isn't thorough."
"Woah… he really is a genius." Kari muttered taking in all the various banners with their different variations of 'Ikkaku loves Yumichika'.
"It's like Valentine's Day exploded all over the place." Renji muttered looking out the window.
"There's no going back from that." Kenpachi muttered looking at the displays.
"That's so romantic Ikkaku!" Orihime said with hands clasped under her chin.
Chad said nothing having seen enough of Urahara's work to recognize it.
Ikkaku tried to talk again but he was enjoying having Yumichika pressed up against him so he sealed his lips and decided to suffer through it.
"You know this means Kira won the betting pool." Kari commented to Chad.
"I bet that someone would involve Urahara so I won too." Chad commented.
"We should have bet too." Uryu says with a scowl.
"Byakuya is holding the bet ledgers and cash." Kari told him mournfully.
"On second thought, it's better if these things are in house." Uryu said adjusting his glasses.
"Especially, since you're still on his bad list." Renji added. "I hope you're prepared to get the cold shoulder for the next three or four decades."
"I thought it would the next three or four centuries." Kari muttered shaking her head.
"Honestly, I never thought of Kuchiki as one to hold grudges," Uryu mused. "perhaps you're a special case Captain."
Kari huffed scowling cutely. "You would think dating the man entitled you to a little slack, but no, not Byakuya."
"Captain… has a girlfriend?" Renji said a little faintly.
"Then why has Kenpachi been hanging around so much?" Uryu frowned.
"Byakuya told him I 'attract espada'." Kari answered sourly. "I swear he's one lab accident away from being an evil super-villain."
"I think Orihime and Chad are dating." Renji said abruptly.
"What?" Kari and Uryu hissed pressing him for details.
"It's just something about the way Chad acts when she's around." Renji said sagely.
Uryu and Kari looked at each other, then glued their eyes to Chad watching him for tells.
Urahara shop
"What do you mean nothing's wrong with it?" Ichigo growled grinding his teeth.
"When have you ever known any of my inventions to fail, Ichigo?" Kisuke smirked.
"You bastard! You just lured me here so you could…" He sputtered indignantly.
"Have my way with you?" Kisuke supplied devilishly.
"GAH!" Ichigo threw his hands up. "You are a hopeless lecher!"
"But I'm your hopeless lecher." Kisuke said silkily.
Ichigo bared his teeth at the other man. Then like lightning striking a fence post it hit him. Pure inspiration.
"So… boyfriend." Ichigo murmured rolling the word over his tongue. "You ready to meet the in-laws?"
Kisuke's eyes widen comically and the man actually paled. Ichigo smiled triumphantly. Finally, finally he got one over on the other man. Kisuke didn't miss his satisfied smirk or the gleam in his eye. Ichigo knew that Kisuke wasn't one to stay down for long so, he wasn't all that surprised by the man's reply.
"I'm free tomorrow night." Kisuke said with twinkle in his eye.
"Tomorrow?" Ichigo croaked.
"Don't you want me to meet your family I-chi-go." Kisuke taunted.
Ichigo gritted his teeth. "Fine, I'll be here at six-thirty and you are not wearing that!"
Kisuke just smiled serenely as the younger man marched out of the shop muttering about something-or-other.
"What to wear?" Kisuke mused tapping his fan against his lips thoughtfully.
The next day a.k.a. meeting the family
"Ichigo my son!" Issin flew at his son aiming to tackle him only to be stopped short when Karin launched a soccer ball at his face.
Ichigo face palmed. "Dad this is my boyfriend. Kisuke that's my dad."
"Oh Mother!" Isshin was draped dramatically against a giant poster of Ichigo's mom. "Our little boy has finally become a man! He's all grown up and brining home his future husband!" He said the last part with tears pouring down his cheeks.
"He's quite eccentric." Kisuke smirked behind his fan.
"No, he's crazy." Karin said sourly.
"Welcome to our home." Yuzu said executing a cute bow.
"These are my sisters Karin and Yuzu." Ichigo said introducing him.
"My name is Kisuke Urahara. It's a pleasure to meet you." Kisuke said shaking Karin's hand and giving Yuzu a sweeping bow.
Yuzu giggled and Karin pulled their dad away from the poster.
"What are your intentions toward my darling Ichigo?" Isshin growled now nose to nose with Kisuke.
"I plan to treat him with love and tenderness." Kisuke replied.
"The Universe is conspiring to kill me by sheer embarrassment." Ichigo muttered under his breath his cheeks an unhealthy shade of red.
"Did you hear that Mother?" Isshin was kneeling at the poster again babbling as tears streaked his cheeks.
Outside the Kurosaki Clinic
"Is his father always that eccentric?" Kari asked trailing behind Byakuya.
"If Renji's reports are to be believed then yes." Byakuya said dismissively.
Kari gaped at the house. "Hey wait for me!" She had to run to catch up to the noble. "So where are going?" She said wrapping herself around his arm.
"Out." He answered without inflection.
"You're being obtuse." Kari pouted.
"It's deliberate." Byakuya said looking straight ahead to conceal his smirk.
"Gah!" Kari huffed. "You really are evil. I'm just glad I'm not you're enemy. I don't think I'd survive the first encounter."
"Few would." Byakuya agreed.
"You're impossible!" Kari accused.
"I can't be impossible." Byakuya closed the distance between them. "What you mean is I'm improbable." He stole a chaste kiss.
Kari shook herself out of a daze and hurried to catch up with him.
Squad 5
"Do you have any twos?" Rukia asked Renji frowning at her cards.
"Go fish." Renji grinned at her over his hand.
"Orihime, do you have any eights?" Uryu asked switching his cards around.
Orihime handed him a card. Uryu placed them down in front of him.
"Chad." Uryu said choosing his next victim. "Do you have any queens?"
Chad handed him the card. "You're good at this Uryu."
Uryu placed the cards down beside the others. "Thanks."
"Hanataro, do you have any tens?" Hanataro handed him a card.
"I think Uryu is going to win." Hanataro said looking at all his neat little discard piles.
"It ain't over yet." The ever competitive Renji muttered.
"Renji, do you have any sevens?" Uryu asked taking a gamble.
"Go fish." Renji smirked.
Uryu drew a card and smirked when he showed it to the others.
"How did he do that?" Orihime asked as Uryu discarded two more cards.
"He's not going to tell us." Chad surmised.
"It's probably some secret Quincy technique." Rukia muttered.
"I would think he's just remembers which cards we're asking for." Hanataro offered his theory.
"He's right." Uryu confirmed with a lazy smile.
"I want a new game." Renji grumbled knowing Uryu was bound to win.
"I have Uno cards." Uryu offered.
"I love Uno!" Orihime cheered.
"At least we'll have a fair chance." Renji muttered.
Squad 11
Ikkaku refilled his glass.
"Sake? At this time of day?" Yumichika said exasperated.
Ikkaku grunted, petting Yumichika's hair placating. Yumichika sniffed but otherwise allowed it. After waiting a century for his partner to come to terms with his feelings he certainly wasn't about to rain on the parade right now.
"I should send Urahara a bottle of sake." Yumichika mused.
"Heh. Make it two." Ikkaku said in agreement.
"He's meeting Ichigo's family today." Yumichika said causally.
Ikkaku choked on his sake. "Send a case."
"For Urahara?" Yumichika asked surprised.
"For Ichigo." Ikkaku countered.
Yumichika smirked. "I should send a case to the Captain too, but Byakuya might take it wrong way. Don't want to get on his bad side."
"Any more than you already are?" Ikkaku smirked.
"Did you know he's dating my Captain?" Yumichika asked. "And we still can't catch a break."
"Byakuya Kuchiki has a girlfriend…" Ikkaku muttered. "How the hell did that happen?"
Yumichika shrugged. "I didn't ask."
The End