Disclaimer: Referencing and paraphrasing The Hunger Games Canon, which belongs to Suzanne Collins.
It's been less than a week since Peeta's interview. Nothing dramatic has happened in district four. There's been no cease-fire, but the rebels are tired and flagging from the strain of holding what ground we have. Too many rebels die each day, in skirmishes with the Capitol, in bombings, from malnutrition, or injuries festering with infection. Food is still scarce and the rebels have set their sights firmly on the marina and the port. I'd never have believed it, but apparently there are huge container ships that come and go from the port with supplies for the Capitol. Not very many, but the Capitol must retain some connection to the rest of the world, which was never even acknowledged in my memory of district 12. Apparently district four is their connection to that world. If we can take control of the port and marina, we win the water as well, and the whole equation changes. But so far the Peacekeepers have had no trouble holding off the rebel forces. Here in sector 1, the train station is a target, but right now the rebels really need to gain some ground in sector 2.
Earlier today the Capitol aired more live footage of bombings, this time of a makeshift hospital reported to be in district 8. Seeing the bombing of the hospital is hard, because it reminds me of my home, but also because it's more rebels and citizens killed by the Capitol. It's terrible to watch, and we worry together about the areas where rebel groups are concentrated here in district 4. It's like watching the world dwindling to nothing, and i can see why some might take Peeta's argument about survival without a cease fire seriously. The message accompanying the broadcast was the usual trash, mostly about how the Capitol is bravely defending its citizens from the lawless rebels, which makes me laugh because otherwise I'd probably cry. Then they show these ridiculous propos about supporting Panem and how we can fight the rebels, and support our 'honorable protectors' the peacekeepers. Naturally, beyond ignoring all the Capitol-enforced hardships, we should serve Panem by reporting any suspicious activity or known rebels to the peacekeepers.
"Perhaps we should bake them a pie?" I ask sarcastically. With a twinkle in his eye, Spinner answers, "Too bad we don't have any nightlock!"
Spinner loves the propoganda. He distracts us all with his parodies of it. "Report suspicious activity? What would that look like?" He dons a poor attempt at a Capitol accent and shrills, "Excuse me Mr. Peacekeeper, but did you know there are hundreds of rebels camping out in our administration buildings? It's terribly distracting!"
I laugh, "yeah, I should probably talk to them." In a saccharine voice of fake innocence I add, "Excuse Me, ma'am, this guy brought me Peacekeeper ration bars today. I think he's against the Capitol's restrictions on fishing and the spoiled tesserae rations this month. Surely he is up to no good!"
Spinner grins back, "Sounds like a trouble maker." He winks.
Spinner and Bear are playing with a communicuff, one of the tech gadget "gifts" from the Peacekeepers. Apparently they were never configured on the Peacekeeper network, so they don't get any messages from the Capitol. It was pretty easy to figure out sending messages on them, but where they went was a little less clear. He'd eventually taken them to Marai, who's such a whiz with technology stuff; you'd think she was from district 3. Together they reprogrammed the communicuffs to transmit messages only among themselves. Last I heard, Marai was still trying to program one to get the Capitol messages - it would give the rebels an amazing strategic advantage to get the same messages that the Capitol troops receive, if she can pull it off. In the meantime, the rest of the pilfered communicuffs are being used by the rebels now. We have one here, that we use to stay in contact with Carlo and Marai.
Spinner's gone out to take provisions to Carlo and Marai and the rebels, leaving the communicuff here with Bear. It's odd but this place doesn't even seem to belong to Carlo anymore, he's here so rarely. Apparently he and Marai have gotten in with the new group leading the rebellion and aren't about to miss out on any action by staying home. Tonight, we're hoping Spinner will bring back more details about the marina - details that wouldn't be trusted to the communicuffs.
I'm watching the Capitol broadcast with Bear when the broadcast signal is suddenly disrupted, and the image of a flame flickers onto a black screen. I tense, the image too similar to the fire in district 12's bombings. Then the image of Katniss' token, my aunt's mockingjay pin, lights up the screen and my mouth drops open. Bear is already calling, "Johnny! Get in here now!"
From the television, Claudius Templesmith's voice booms out "Katniss Everdeen..." and there she is, on the broadcast. Katniss launches into a fiery speech repudiating Peeta's call for a cease fire. Still stunned, I can't help but laugh.
I blurt out, "It's Katniss! She's, she's a rebel. Look at her." Bear looks at me like I'm crazy. The ridiculousness of a Rebel broadcast, the joy of seeing my closest friend, how foreignly commanding she seems, taking on the mantle of a Rebellion leader, overwhelms me. It's too much. To the rest of the world she may be a defiant victor, but to me Katniss is still the girl who sat quietly across the table from me in school, and despite everything that's happened in the last year, she's never been a leader. She's only done what she had to to survive. This is completely different. I can't restrain the laughter, and grin incredulously at Bear. He's grinning too, but he's still looking at me oddly, confused by my reaction. Of course he doesn't get it.
Johnny tears into the room, looking expectant. His eager gaze quickly settles on the screen and immediately he hollers out, "Whoo-whee!"
The screen changes to the scene of the bombing we'd seen earlier, but shows something that wasn't in the Capitol broadcast. This recording is from the rebels' perspective, as they shoot to take down the bombers. That is when I get the second shock. Gale. Gale is on the screen, next to Katniss, fighting for the rebellion. At least, i think it's him. It's so fast; he looks different somehow, and he's gone from the scene in a flash. I gasp in disbelief, wondering if it was really him. I tell myself I imagined it. Gale's dead. They destroyed district 12 and everyone in it. Gale is dead. It couldn't be him with Katniss, shooting arrows at the Capitol bombers in district 8. As other unknown rebels appear on the screen, I keep looking but don't see him again. I push away my confusion to focus on what my friends see too - Katniss, the rebellion, fighting back against the Capitol.
We are all entranced. It's amazing to even think of a rebel broadcast. Johnny cheers the fighters on, pumping his arm in the air. Then the screen is back to Katniss, on the street, calling out against the Capitol. "If we burn, you burn with us," she directs to President Snow. Whatever we've heard about a Victor escape, this is the first real proof that anyone escaped the Capitol in one piece. We're all grinning and talking over each other. A message comes across on the communicuff, and Bear gleefully passes it around. It says, "MJAY ON FIRE! DOWN WITH CAPITAL!"
Late that night, after Johnny's gone to bed, it's still on our minds. They've re-aired it a few times, and each time, I find little things we hadn't noticed before. Spinner returns, equally exuberant about the broadcast. He thinks the entire district has seen it by now, and the rebel leaders are designing attacks to involve everyone now while enthusiasm is so high.
When it comes on again, I'm quiet, taking it all in. Katniss wears an amazing outfit, half battle uniform and half mockingjay costume, which must be her stylist Cinna's handiwork. I can see the wound on her arm, where Johanna dug the tracker out of her arm. She's shooting arrows from a decorative black bow, much fancier than the one she'd had back home, the one she'd taught me to use. When Gale's on screen, I drink in the sight of him alive and whole. His face is scarred, but it really is him. He looks incredible. His bow looks amazingly complicated and high tech, but he seems to wield it naturally. I've never seen him shoot before, his stormy gray eyes are more intense than his usual glare. I smile to myself, imagining the satisfaction he must get from taking out bombers, after the hardship the Capitol has forced on him for so long.
That's when Bear asks hesitantly, "That's ... that cousin of hers, isn't it?" My face contorts at the lie told to protect Katniss and Peeta in their first games. "No ... I mean, yes ... " I start, but I don't know how to continue. In the quiet, Bear seems to confirm a suspicion. "You know them. Him and Katniss? And Peeta too?"
I squeeze my eyes shut and take a shaky breath, biting my lip to control my emtions. He probably figured out a long time ago that I'm not really from four, though he hasn't questioned me. There have been enough little signs along the way, let alone all the stupid questions I've had to ask. I nod silently.
My voice quavers when I ask, "Don't tell anyone?" When I look up to him, he's got a small sad smile. There's a hint of amusement in his voice when he asks in return,
"Who'd believe me?" His eyes flicker back and forth between mine, taking in my confused emotions. I look in his eyes and see the question hiding underneath his sympathy.
I take a deep breath, and continue, "They're my friends. Well, Katniss, anyway. I knew her in ... in 12." Katniss and I barely talked before her first games, but somehow our mostly silent lunches together added up to a lot more than what was said. Between the victory tour and the announcement of the Quell, I'd probably spent as much time with her as anyone, except maybe Prim. We'd both had so many empty hours to fill, and daddy certainly couldn't object to me spending time with a victor. Dinners with her family had been a welcome change from the emptiness so common in my own house.
Gale - what is Gale to me? A foolish dream? An impossibility that I'd given up on, even before I thought he was dead, or so I thought. Of course, I rarely saw Gale except when they came to sell strawberries, or when he'd come to talk to Katniss at school. Before the Quell, I more than occasionally brought Capitol papers to Katniss on Sundays, when Gale might be there teaching them snares, but he hardly even acknowledged my presence. Not that I could blame him, knowing all about the difficulties he and his family faced. He didn't know I'd brought the morphling, of course. And Peeta, were we friends? I didn't know him that well either, but he'd always been nice enough, when I saw him in school or at the bakery, or preparing for the Quell. He too had little time for friends, but we'd gotten along well enough. He would occasionally walk me home and was always polite enough to inquire about me and my family, and a couple times he even opened up to me a bit. I guess we were friends.
Finally admitting the truth to Bear is like releasing a humongous weight. He wants me to tell the others, of course, but he agrees not to say anything, at least for now. I don't divulge my life story to him, but now that he knows the truth, I won't hide anything from my past from him either. Bear doesn't push, though. He often likes to think through new information awhile before talking about it, and I imagine there'll be more questions once he's had a chance to fit this new information into the puzzle of me he's been piecing together.