Longest chapter ever. Two more after this.
Chapter 17
Brittany's POV
Fall
It's been difficult.
Being away from Santana has been hard. Day in and day out, it's a struggle.
It's been a few weeks since she left. The first few days were the hardest. Even though I didn't see her everyday during the summer, I knew all I had to do was hop in the truck and drive a few minutes to where she was. I can't do that now. I can't just get in my truck and drive over to her house. Cuz she's not there.
I can't see her in person any days of the week now or even on the weekend.
We talk on the phone everyday. And text. And Skype. And email. But I can't physical touch her and that's probably the hardest part. It's hard being away from Santana.
Some days I call her on my lunch break if I know she's not in class. Other days I wait until the end of the day to speak with her but we always talk everyday, even if it's only for a few minutes on our busiest of days. It's great to hear her voice. Just hearing her voice is a comfort for me some times. If I'm feeling sad about her being so far away it's good just to hear her.
We do a lot of text messaging too. Every time I think of something funny I will text it to her.
At nights when both of us are free and have nothing going on we Skype. At first, that was weird for me. I'm not very technologically advanced so it was difficult to figure out but after a few times and some coaching from Santana I figured out how to work the Skype. Now I'm a pro.
We've spent hours and hours just talking or laying on the bed in front of the computer. But sometimes that feel like it's not enough.
That's why I'm impatiently awaiting Halloween. Usually, I am a patient person. Not a lot of things bother me or get to me. I don't have any problems with waiting for things, or people, or whatever it might be. It's not just the waiting, it's being positive and having a positive attitude while I wait that's hard.
But, Halloween, I'm having a hard time waiting for that day to come. I'm anticipating Halloween weekend because that's the next time I will get to see Santana again.
"I have a proposition for you."
"What's that?" Santana asks over the phone.
"Halloween weekend. You clear your schedule and I come down and visit you." I tell her.
"I don't know Britt. Don't get me wrong, I would love to see you but I have so much to do. Homework and studying and other stuff." I can hear the wanting in Santana's voice yet her holding back also.
"Well, I don't care. Even if you have to study or write a paper. I'm coming. And you can't say no." I tell her with strength and conviction.
"Oh really?"
"Yes, really." I smile big. I can tell she is on board now. "You don't have a choice. I'm coming to visit for Halloween. We can do whatever you want but I am coming. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. Got it."
Santana giggles and my insides warm at the sound. "Got it."
"Now that that's settled, how was your day?" I ask changing the direction of our conversation.
It was about a week ago that Santana and I had the discussion. I guess it was more of me telling her what was going to happen but whatever. I thought about not telling her and surprising her by showing up Halloween weekend. But, I knew she would probably be busy and not like the surprise.
Now, I'm counting down the days. I'm gonna drive down to Chicago on Friday morning getting to Santana's around the time that her last class for the week ends. Halloween is a Monday so the celebrations are the weekend before but that's still over a week away. There are still nine days between now and next Friday. They can't go fast enough for me.
I have my bag packed, my directions printed out, my sunglasses on, my bottle of water in the cup holder, and my gift for Santana. I'm ready to go.
I figured that the drive would take roughly three hours maybe a little more. I am predicting to arrive at three in the afternoon when Santana gets done with her final class for the day. If I'm lucky I will be there before she gets back to her dorm and I will be waiting outside. Hopefully.
My drive goes by fairly smoothly. It's a straight shot until I get to the Chicago area. That's when I need to look at the directions so I know which exits to take and which streets to turn on.
I arrive at her building at ten minutes to three. My plan seems to be in place still.
I wait a few minutes before getting out of my truck, taking the gift with me and going over to her building. The late October air is chilling but it's nothing I can't handle. I just zip my thin fall jacket up to the top.
I wait with my shoulder against the brick building for ten minutes before I spot Santana walking towards me. She doesn't see me standing there. Her head is ducked down and she looks like she is reading a piece of paper.
When she finally looks up, she's only about twenty feet from me. Her arms drop to her side and she smiles. Santana takes one big step and then starts into a light jog.
"Brittany." She cheers as she throws her arms around my shoulders.
"Hey." I whisper into her neck. I wrap my arms around her middle and swivel us back and forth in our embrace. I breathe her in. She smells just as I remember, maybe better.
"I didn't think you were coming until later." She pulls her head and face back from our hug so that she can look at my face. "I didn't clean my room yet. I was gonna do that after class. Now." Santana get a weird wider and I can see the panic there.
"I don't care." I assure her.
She leans back in and wraps herself tight to me. I can feel her breath on my neck as she breathes in and out in excitement. I can feel her heartbeat in her chest. Rapid and alive. Mine is in a similar state. Pounding faster than it has in a while, pounding for her.
Santana presses an kiss to my neck before pulling back again. "Let's go inside." She says and takes me by the hand. "Wait. What's that?" She points to my other hand.
I'm holding a present bag in my left hand. "It's for you." I tell her and hold it out to her.
"What- you didn't- Brittany." She says in a too shy way. "Let's go upstairs."
Santana lives on the second floor of a three floor dorm building. We ascend the two flights of stairs and she leads me about halfway down the hall to her door. "I told my roommate to get lost for the weekend."
"Oh." I say disappointed. "I wanted to meet her."
Santana looks at me seriously and cocks her head to the side. "Well, it's not the weekend yet. She might be around still." Santana puts the key in the lock and twists. She pushes the door open. "Lindsay." She calls into the room and waits for a response but doesn't get one. "Must not be here."
We step into the room. It's like your typical dorm room. Small and cramped. Santana's stuff on one side of the room and her roommate, Lindsay's, stuff on the other.
Lindsay's side is nice and neat and organized. Her bed is made and her desk is in a particular order. Santana's side of the room isn't messy but what I would call organized chaos. I'm sure Santana knows where everything is but her piles of schoolwork and clothes aren't neat and organized in stacks like Lindsay's are.
"I like it." I say as I look at the room. Both girls have some personal decorations and photo hanging on there appropriate sides of the room. I even spot a picture of Santana and I. In the photo I have my arm around her shoulder and we are smiling from ear to ear. We are in Santana's kitchen at the house on the bay. "When was this?" I ask picking up the picture.
"My dad must have took that. The day you came to the house when Quinn was there, I think. I didn't know he took it. He sent it to me the first week I was here." Santana explains the photo as I look over it. It's a really good picture of us. We look casual but also really happy.
"Here." I hold the bag out in front of me and set the photo down. "Open it."
"You didn't have to get me something, Britt."
"I know. I wanted to though." I jiggle the bag a little bit, hoping she will taking it from my fingers.
Santana takes the bag and looks inside. She pulls the tissue paper out first and then looks down inside the bag. She pulls the gift out next. "Brittany, I don't-" She looks over the little dry erase board. "What's it for?"
"It's for whatever you want. I thought you could hang it up somewhere on your wall. Use it for reminders or something. It's just a little something. And I knew you didn't have one." I explain.
"Thank you. I will put it to good use. I have something in mind already." Santana says. She puts the dry erase board and gift bag on her desk.
"What do you want to do tonight?" I've been wondering all day what are plans for this weekend were going to be. I don't really care. I would be more than happy to just sit in Santana's room all weekend while she does homework but I know that she will want to do more than that.
"Since my roommate will be gone I thought we could order takeout and stay in. I just want you all to myself tonight." Santana wraps her arms around my waist as she speaks.
"Sounds perfect." I raise a hand to her face and cup her cheek.
"Tomorrow night we are going to a Halloween party." Santana says softly.
"Oooooh." I throw my other arm over her shoulder, my hand hanging limply behind her. I shift my feet and start a little back and forth shuffle. Santana follows along whether she wants to or not. I wouldn't exactly call it dancing but that's sort of what it is, a dance or a shuffle. We don't move too fast, just a slow, steady back and forth, back and forth.
"I got us costumes." Santana lays he heads against my shoulder as we sway. I wrap my hand that was on her cheek around her other shoulder and lock my fingers together.
"What are they?"
She giggles and the vibration rattles against my skin. "Ronald McDonald and The Hamburglar."
"Oh my god. That's brilliant." I stop shuffling us around the room in our little dance. "Hey." I lean back so Santana takes her head from my chest.
She looks up at me with a big dopey smile. "Yeah?"
"I really missed you." I whisper and lean in for a kiss. Santana meets me halfway. When our lips connect it's like everything is right in the world again. I feel like this is where I belong. I'm where I'm supposed to be. With Santana. In her arms and she in mine.
"I missed you too. It's been a long couple of months." Santana mumbles against my shoulder where she rests her head.
"Agreed." I rub my hands up and down her back slowly. "So, am I the Hamburglar or Ronald."
"Ronald."
Not that I care too much. "Why am I Ronald?"
"Cuz you're taller."
I chuckle at Santana's response. Of course I would be Ronald McDonald because I'm the taller of the two of us. I should have thought of that. "Okay. So, what's next, sex or food?"
Santana snaps her head back to look at me in slight shock. I wink at her and she rolls her eyes. "I'll get the takeout menus for the closest restaurants. We can eat first."
I wanna say I'll be eating either way but that might be too much. "Okay." I say instead.
Santana lets go of me and I have to let go of her as she steps away from me. She goes over to her desk and pulls open the top drawer. After some shuffling she produces a handful of menus. "You can choose." She hands them to me and starts unpacking her school bag.
I sit down on the bed and look through the menus for something to catch my eye.
I have a very naked Santana laying on her back on her tiny dorm room bed.
I twist my tongue around a stiff nipple. She arches into me, her fingernails digging into the fabric of my t-shirt. I release her breast and sit up. Kneeling, I reach for the hem of my shirt and pull it over my head, and then release my bra. I lick my lips and look down at the wonderful woman below me.
Santana catches my gaze then flicks her eyes lower. Her fingers undo the button of my jeans and she starts sliding them down my legs. I help Santana in removing my pants. A task that seems to prove harder than it should. I shuffle around until finally my pants and underwear both come off.
"There." I say with finality.
"Come here." Santana tugs on my hand. I fall forward, pressing my hands to each side of her head. I wiggle myself in between her hips. "Britt." Santana moans as I press against her.
I smirk and sink to my elbows. Santana's hands find my back again. This time without any barrier. I attach my lips to her neck and she pulls my body closer to hers, if that's possible, we were already impossibly close. I kiss down the length of her neck and then suck on her pulse point. The moan that escapes Santana spurs my actions further.
I rock my hips against hers and Santana reciprocates with her own. I sink further into her and start a steady rhythm. I work my lips up the column of her throat. Santana sinks her fingernails further into my shoulders.
The little gasps and grunts that are coming from Santana are the most glorious sounds to have ever graced my ears. I press down against Santana again. She presses up into me. I can feel it. That build up. That tightness. I slide my hands between Santana's back and the sheets, my palms against her skin, holding her.
The next time my clit grazes against Santana's is when I lose it. My body tenses as a rub harder against her, riding through my orgasm. I feel Santana's lips on my neck and snap my eyes open to look at her. I don't know when I closed them. She cranes her neck so that she can kiss me on the lips.
It's a short kiss but heated with the passion that surrounds us. I pull my face away from hers so I can get the air that I need. My senses come back to me after and I wiggle a hand out from under her and slide it in between our bodies. I flick over her clit a few times before she has her release. She arches further into me and moan at her peak before relaxing and falling back to the bed.
Santana pulls me down with her and wraps me up in a hug. She breathes hard against my right ear. I kiss her cheek lazily then move to her ear. I take the lobe between my lips and give it a gentle tug. "I've waited so long for that." I whisper in her ear and press a kiss to the shell before leaning back, so I can see Santana's face.
"Me too." She chuckles light-heartedly when her breathes are more normal again.
I shift to her side so that I am not laying directly on top of her. Her face is the picture of serenity, completely calm and happy. I tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear and kiss her temple.
Santana rolls her head lazily towards me. She smiles big. When her eyes connect with mine it's like she can see directly into my soul. Deep down, where no one has ever seen.
One of her fingers comes within my line of vision and gets closer until she presses it to the tip of my nose. "Boop." She giggles and rests her palm against my cheek.
I lay my arm across her stomach. "You seem happy."
She nods. "I am. But-" She bites on her bottom lip. It's not in the shy way though, it's more of a sexy bite to the lip.
I raise an eyebrow. "What?"
She grins and there's something about it that makes me think I know what she's thinking. "Again?" She asks with a naughty little smirk.
"Again." I say and slide my hand over her stomach, down between her legs. Santana squeals and I attack her lips with a hungry kiss.
"I was thinking about the upcoming holidays. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years. I want to know what you think about that." I ask as we lay in Santana's bed together satisfied and happy.
"I hadn't really thought about it." Santana admits with a shrug. "I've been so busy with school I don't have time to think about stuff like that."
My fingers twist in the ends of Santana's hair. "Do you know what your plans are?"
"I usually go home."
"But-" I'm hoping there's more. I hoping Santana will adjust her holiday plans this year so they include me.
"But-" She turns her head to the side so that she can see my face and I hers. Santana tucks the sheet up under her arms covering her naked chest. "-I want to spend time with you this year."
I roll onto my side like Santana, but am less concerned with the sheets and were they rest. They cover from about my belly button down though. "I was hoping you would say that." I scoot closer to Santana. "What do you think? I would love to have you with me in Wisconsin but I also know that your family is important to you. Maybe we could split time."
"What do you do for Thanksgiving?"
I scrunch my face up. "Have dinner with my parents."
"That's it. No other family comes over?" Santana asks. We haven't really talked too much about my family. I don't have a big family. The family that I do have live more than a couple hours drive way from where I live, so we don't get together for Thanksgiving. Santana knows of my mom and dad but hasn't met them.
"Nope. Just me and mom and dad."
"Hmm." She bites on her bottom lip. I can almost see the wheels turning in her head as she thinks. "Would your parents be mad if you came and spent Thanksgiving with my family in Ohio?" Her eyes search mine, waiting for my answer.
"Probably not." I know they wouldn't be. I told my mom and dad all about Santana, with her permission of course. They know that I am seeing her and I don't think they would mind if I wasn't there for Thanksgiving.
This could potentially be huge. If Santana invites me- and everyone agrees- to her family's Thanksgiving that's a big step. That's like meeting the family, officially.
"Does that mean we can tell your parents about us being together?" I ask trying not to sound overly hopeful.
"Maybe." Santana grins.
That's a yes. I feel like jumping around the room and squealing like a teenage girl but refrain myself from doing so. I opt for a more subdued fist pump.
Santana giggles at my side. "You're such a dork sometimes."
"You love it."
"I love you." She reaches out and boops me on the nose with a finger.
"Mmm. I love you too." I hum. I roll into Santana so that I can give her a kiss.
I rest my chin on her shoulder and look up at Santana. "Now that we have Thanksgiving squared away, what about Christmas?"
Santana rolls me eyes. "I say we split it. But can we get through one holiday first before talking about another. It's like selling Halloween candy the day after Labor Day. Too soon."
I chuckle. "Okay. But, as soon as Thanksgiving is over I will be asking again, so be ready."
Santana swats at my arm.
I'm standing in front of the mirror on the closet door in Santana's dorm room. Big clown shoes on my feet, a red curly wig on top my head, and yellow one-piece costume with red and white stripped arms. I look ridiculous. "Santana?"
"What?" She huffs. She's trying to get her costume on.
"Do I really have to wear this?" I ask. I'm having second thought about agreeing to wear this so easily.
She doesn't answer. Instead, I see her appear behind me in the mirror in her black and white prison strips and red tie with hamburgers on it. "At least I didn't get you a Grimace costume." I jokes and kisses my shoulder.
I grimace. "Yeah, I'm fine with this. I'd rather be Ronald than a big purple blob."
"That's what I thought." She tips forward on her toes and kisses me on the cheek. "Are you ready to go then?"
"Yep." I bounce on my toes for second.
"Okay, let's go." Santana grabs her things and we head out the door.
We've spent all of Halloween weekend together and it has been wonderful. Last night was the costume party. It was super fun and I got to meet Santana's college friends. We laughed and drank and danced and had a ton of fun. At least I did. I know Santana did too. She even showed me off to her friends.
That might have been my favorite part of the night. I fact that Santana has come so far in recently months still amazes me sometimes. Last night at the party she introduced me to her friends as her girlfriend with a proud smile on her face. I had an even prouder one my face. A few of her friends seemed a little surprised at first but were happy for her.
I was the big topic at the Halloween party.
It's bittersweet though. I have to go home today.
We went out for breakfast this morning and Santana's in the shower now. That leaves me to sit in her dorm room and think over the recent days.
The past few days have been great. I only wish that it wasn't only a few days and that there are many days before I will see Santana again.
I watch as Santana blow dries her hair. She sits at her desk and uses the hair dryer. Every little while she'll look over at me. I'm laying on the bed and smile at her when she does. She'll wiggles her eyebrows at me and my smile only grows.
She shuts the hair dryer off when she is done. She starts to do her makeup next. "You're beautiful." I mumble. Santana turns to me and raises an eyebrow. "Without makeup, you're beautiful."
She wrinkles up her face, then sets whatever she has in her hand down. I watch as Santana gets out of her chair, walks over to the bed, and crawls on top of me. She cups my face with one hand before pressing her lips to mine.
"Will you help me put the dry erase board up?" Santana asks in between kisses.
She climbs off the bed and holds her hand out. I take her extended hand and she helps me out of the bed.
When we hang the dry erase board Santana grabs the packet of markers that were still at the bottom of the gift bag that I brought. "Pick a color." She holds the packet towards me. I reach in with two fingers and pull out the blue one. I hold it out for Santana to take which she does.
I have no idea why I had to pick the color. She sets the packet, with three markers still in it, on the desk. When she uncaps the marker she reaches up to the board above her desk and writes on it.
It's a number. "What's the number mean?" I ask as she puts the marker away.
She smiles a tight-lipped smile. "It's the number of days until we see each other again."
"Santana." I gasp and look over at the white board and the number twenty-six that sits directly, in big blue writing, in the middle of the board.
"It's a countdown." Santana continues. "As soon as you gave me it I thought of the idea. For now it's the only thing on the board but maybe if I have something I need to remember I'll move the number to one side and right a little note on there."
Santana reaches for my hands and takes them in her own. "For as long as we are apart there will always be a number up there."
When I got the dry erase board I never imagined this. I never would have thought that a board, or a number would make me feel like crying. For many reasons. Because Santana is so sweet. Because we have to spend so many days apart. Because, because, because.
"I don't know what to say." I tell her quietly.
"You don't have to say anything, other than you'll be there twenty-six days from now." Santana raises my hands to her lips and kisses my knuckles. I nod and try to shallow the lump in my throat. Santana keeps peppering kisses over my knuckles and then over the backs of my hands. She turns my palms up and presses her lips once to each of my palms. "I love you."
"I love you, San." It's all I can choke out.
X
I took today off of work so that I can drive down to Northwestern and pick Santana up and then we can drive to her parents house in Ohio. It's gonna be a long day but I am excited for it. I am excited to see Santana again. It's been about three and a half weeks since Halloween and that time seems like it was much longer than that.
The fall is definitely in full force now. Most days are cool and the air is crisp. Fall is my favorite time of the year. I love the coolness. I don't like those hot, humid summer days. A lot of people say spring is there favorite season but not me. I like fall the most.
There are so many things I like about fall. It's so different from any other time of the year. The days become shorter which makes my work days shorter. I love the trees in the fall. In the spring they bud into life, in the summer they are full and beautiful and in the fall they change colors and lose their leaves. I love the colors and the crunch of the leaves under my feet once they fall. I love that I can go outside and not be too hot or too cold. I especially love when we fire up the wood stove at work. The smell of wood burning is one of my favorite smells in the whole world. Maybe that's strange but that's me.
The bad thing about fall is that the landscaping season in winding to a close. As winter approaches we will have to wrap all of our jobs up, do all the fall clean-up jobs, and then pack everything away for the winter.
The drive to Chicago goes well. I brought my directions with just in case. I think I remember which roads to take once I get there. That's a thing I've gotten really good at being a landscaper. Directions and finding place is pretty easy for me. My boss will sometimes give me directions over the phone and I have to find the house myself. Other times, I go to a place once and then don't return to that place for months or sometimes years and have to remember which roads to take and how to get there.
Santana was going to her Wednesday morning class but she is going to skip out of her afternoon class. I wasn't sure that she should be skipping classes but she assured me that she would be fine and contact one of her classmates and get what she missed from them.
I pull into the parking lot of Santana's dorm building. I don't know what building her class is in otherwise I would surprise her by waiting for her by the door for the class to let out.
Instead, I wait in my truck for Santana to text me, like we planned.
Nearly ten minutes pass before my phone chimes. I look down at it in the cup holder and pick it up. I swipe my thumb over the screen, unlocking it.
I'm done w class. R u here yet?
I lock my phone and hop out of my truck, locking the doors before I go. I hurry over to Santana building. I lean against the wall and unlock my phone again to type out a reply message.
I'm outside ur building
I wait by the building for either Santana to appear or for her to text me back.
My waiting ends with two arms wrapping around me from behind. "Santana." I squeal and spin around in her arms.
"Hey, Britt-Britt." She says when our eyes meet. "How are you?"
"I'm great. Now. I'm excited for Thanksgiving with your family." I can't contain the smile on my face.
"Good. Wanna come up and help me get me stuff so we can go?"
"Yep."
"Okay, just put that in the back seat of my car. And get your bag too." Santana instructs.
"Wait?" I stop and look at her questioning her.
"We're taking my car, Britt." Santana says.
"B-but, I thought we would take my truck."
"Are you kidding? We are taking my car. It's more fuel efficient. Besides, Brittany, you already do too much for me. I couldn't ask you to take your truck all the way to my parents house. We're taking my car. End of story." Santana pats me on the arm and hands me her car keys. "I just want to make sure I don't forget anything."
"Okay." I go to leave but Santana stops me.
"You more thing." She rolls up on her tiptoes and plants one on my lips. When she relinquishes my lips she pushes against my shoulder with one hand. I stumble backwards into her dorm room door. "Go." Santana mumbles and wipes her thumb under her bottom lip.
I smirk and leave the room.
When we arrive to Santana's parents house it's late in the day. It's been a long day and all I want do is crash.
"You ready?"
I nod. "Yeah."
"Okay. Let's do this." Santana squeezes my hand before letting it go and getting out of the car. She opens the back door and pulls out her duffle bag before I can get out of the car. When I do get out Santana is at my side. "Hurry up. I want to go to bed and get my snuggle on."
That's motivation enough for me to get my butt moving. I scramble to grab my bag from the back and run up the sidewalk behind Santana, meeting her at the front door just at the same time she rings the doorbell.
We wait for a few seconds before the door swings open and there is Santana's dad. "Hello, girls. How was the drive?"
"Tiring." Santana grumbles.
"Well, then come in." He turns and waves his arm over his shoulder. He continues talking as we enter the house. "How have you been, Brittany?"
"Very well, Antonio, excited about Thanksgiving. I love turkey."
Antonio chuckles. "That's good. Your mom's in kitchen. I assume you will want to say hello to her before you guys crash for the night."
"Yeah." Santana confirms this.
"Okay. Set your bags down and I will take them up to your room for you." He continues.
We set our bags at our feet. Santana goes over to her dad and gives him a hug and kisses him on the cheek. "Thank you." She whispers but I still her it.
"Thank you, Antonio. And thank you for having me for your family's Thanksgiving." I tell the man as I pass him.
"It's my pleasure, Brittany." He says with a warm smile that reminds me of Santana's.
I smile back before following Santana into the kitchen to greet her mother.
"Hello, mom." Santana announces her presence. "How are you?"
"Oh, Santana." Mrs. Lopez jumps up from her seat and comes over to give Santana a big hug. "You're here."
"Yeah, mom, we're here."
"Good." She holds Santana by the shoulders and looks over her daughter. "You look skinny. Have you been eating enough? Here, I'll whip something up for you."
I can't see the expression on Santana's face from behind, but I'm sure she's not pleased with the specific attention her mom is giving her. I hear her sigh though. "Mom no. We ate dinner on the way here. Say hello to Brittany." Santana side steps her mom and the woman appears before me unblocked.
"Hello, Brittany, how have you been? It's been a long time since I've seen you. Forth of July, was it?"
"I believe so." I confirm. "And I'm good."
"Are you girls tired?" Her mom asks.
"Yes, mom. I think we are just going to go to bed right away. That way we will be well rested for the big day tomorrow." Santana tells her mom. She looks around the kitchen. I'm not sure for what, but she looks like she is trying to find something.
"Alright." Her mom sighs. Is she disappointed? "I'll see you and your friend in the morning then."
I try to remain calm and not look suspicious all of a sudden. It makes me a little uneasy when someone uses the word friend in description with my association with Santana. I know I shouldn't be, but I feel like I'm lying and someone will see that lie on me somehow.
It's ridiculous, I know.
"Goodnight, ma." Santana says.
"Goodnight, girls." The older Lopez woman turns and goes back to her seat at the island counter.
When Santana turns around she nods her head and points behind me silently. I guess that's my cue to turn around and go upstairs.
When I step into Santana's bedroom it's like stepping back in time. "Wow." I breathe.
"Hey, don't make fun." Santana warns.
"It's like going back in time." I look around the room for a minute. "You clearly haven't changed anything in here since you were a teenager."
"Not really. I don't spend much time here anymore. I don't really see the point in redecorating when I'm never here. It's kinda nice too. To come back and be reminded of my childhood and teenage years."
"Yeah." I spot our bags on the floor at the foot of the bed. "Were you serious about going to sleep?"
"Yes and no." Santana shrugs, then goes for her bags. She pulls out her pajamas and puts them on the bed. "I was thinking we could get changed and ready for bed and then cuddle up and watch a movie on my laptop. That way my parents think we are asleep but I can still get my cuddles in." She rummages around in her bag before producing her bathroom bag. "I'll change and get ready first." She gathers all her stuff in one arm and tiptoes over to me. Putting a hand on my shoulder for balance Santana leans in and pecks me on the cheek. "Be right back, babe."
As soon as the bedroom door closes behind Santana I scramble over to my overnight bag and find my pajamas. I strip my clothes of as fast as I can and put my night clothes on equally as fast. I just have to wash my face and brush my teeth when Santana gets done in the bathroom and I'm ready for the night.
When she comes back she looks surprised. "Oh. You changed already."
I nod and rush passed her into the hallway. "Brittany." I hear Santana say as I slip into the bathroom. I quickly brush my teeth and wash my face. I use the toilet and then make my way back to Santana.
"Someone's eager." She says when I enter her room again.
"Can you blame me?"
"Not at all." She pats the spot next to her on the bed. She's sitting up with her back against the headboard, she already has her laptop on her lap and looks like she is ready to go.
I cross the room in three big steps and jump into the bed. I kiss her on the cheek, like she did to me before. She smiles and I have to kiss her smile. "What movie are we watching?" I ask and settle into her side, laying my head on her shoulder.
"Despicable Me." Santana puts the computer more securely on her lap and hits play. She wraps her left are around me and settles in. I lay my hand on her stomach just above the computer and make little circles and patterns with my fingers.
The movie starts and everything fades away except for what's happening on the screen and Santana next to me. The long drive disappears. The time we've spent apart is a thing of the past. What matters right now is my girl and the movie we are watching.
Thanksgiving dinner with Santana's family was great. They welcomed me into their family with open arms. I know her mom and dad like me. I knew that during the summer. It was a little more difficult with her grandma and other relatives. I think they were unsure of me and why I was spending Thanksgiving with their family. But they never voiced any negative thoughts, if they had them.
After diner 'the kids' had to clean up the dishes. I suppose it was only fair. Santana's mom and abuela did all the cooking for the big meal.
It was a full house. Lots of people, lots of conversation, and lots of noise. I'm not used to that. Thanksgiving at my parents house is calm and quiet. It's just the three of us and we don't make that much noise. But Santana's parents house is a totally different thing. It's so alive and joyous. It's a totally different experience for me.
Once the dinner is finished and everything is cleaned up all of the extended family leaves. Her mom and dad and brother are in the kitchen when Santana grabs me by the elbow and pulls me into the living room.
"I'm gonna do it now." Santana whispers next to me. "Go sit on the couch." She instructs. I go into the living room and sit down in the middle of the couch. Santana goes into the kitchen. "Can I have everyone in the living room." Santana raises her voice over her brother's. "I have an announcement to make."
When everyone is seated Santana comes over and sits down on my right side. I want to take her hand to calm her nerves but I can't, not yet.
"What is this about, Santana?" Her mom speaks up. "Are you sick?"
"No, ma. I'm not sick. I'm perfectly healthy." Santana chuckles a little, then takes a deep breath and composes herself.
"Just hear me out okay?" Everyone in the room nods. "First, I'll start by saying that I love you all so much. You are my family. Second, as you may know I've gone through some changes in the last six months or so. Over the last summer I did a lot of thinking. A lot of soul searching, as some might say. I made some decisions that I should have made sooner. I let myself experience new things. I let myself live without worry or regret. The last summer was the best thing that has happened to me in a long time. I'm glad I stayed at the vacation house."
I watch Santana as she speaks. I can tell that she is nervous but she pushes through. I'm so proud of her right now.
"That's part of the reason why Brittany is here with us for Thanksgiving."
"Because of summer? I don't get it." Robbie mumbles.
"Thank you mom and dad for that." Santana says with tight-lipped smile, ignoring her brothers words. I know her parents were a little hesitant about me spending time with their family for the holiday but they agreed.
"We like Brittany. She's more than welcome." Santana's mom comments.
"Yeah. Well, that's good cuz you'll be seeing a lot more of her in the future." Santana looks to me. I nod for encouragement and give her a tiny warm smile. She doesn't turn back to the room when she speaks again. She looks right into my eyes as she begins again. "I feel comfortable enough to announce that Brittany and I are together. We wanted to be together at Thanksgiving not because she is my new friend but because she is my girlfriend." I smile, proud, and Santana smiles, relieved, back.
After Santana says what she needs to say I look around the room for everyone's reaction. Her mother is looking down at the hardwood floor, nodding her head a little bit.
When I look to Robbie I have to shake my head because he has that evil little smile of his on his face. He makes eye contact with me. "Makes sense now." I narrow my eyes at him. I have no clue to what he is talking about.
I turn my attention to Antonio over in the armchair in the corner of the room. He has one leg folded over the other, his hands clasped together on his knee. There is a knowing grin on his face.
"Mom, dad, someone says something." Santana speaks up again. I can hear the worry and the nervousness in her voice. She looks around the room until her eyes fix on her father in the corner, seeing what I just saw a few seconds before. "Dad?"
"Yes, dear?" I turns his body towards Santana.
"Why do you have that weird look on your face?" She's getting concerned now.
I put my hand on her thigh and rub my thumb in circles over the denim of her jeans. Santana doesn't relax but I continue anyway, just to let her now that I am here with her.
Antonio glances at me before turning back to Santana. "I've known for a while now." He smirks.
"What?" Robbie nearly shrieks from my left side.
I sink a little in my seat.
"Since when?" Santana asks timidly.
Antonio shrugs. "The day you left the vacation house at the end of summer."
"What? How did you know?" Santana gasps from beside me.
I slide down the couch further. I hope I'm not about to get into trouble here.
"When you were saying your goodbyes to Brittany." He nods over in my direction. I look around the room, everywhere but at Mr. Lopez. "It seemed too personal. I felt like I was intruding on something as I stood there."
"Oh." Santana mumbles.
"There's more. My suspicions were confirmed when you were driving out of the driveway. I asked Brittany a question that sealed everything."
Santana shifts next to me. I'm not looking at her but I can tell she is watching me. I'm looking down at my lap instead.
"What was it?" Santana asks.
I'm not sure if she's asking me or her dad. A few moments pass in silence. When Antonio doesn't answer I know that he is waiting for me to. "He asked me if I loved you." I tell Santana the what her dad asked me in the driveway all those months ago.
"Brittany nodded and I didn't need to know anymore than that." Antonio says and stands from his chair. I look up to see him cross the room. He stops in front of Santana and me. "I trust that you will treat my daughter with love and respect. That you will not harm her in any way, shape, or form. That you will make her feel happy and cared for." It's a warning for me. I nod, too shocked to use my voice.
"She does, daddy." Santana says from my right side. She wraps her arm around my shoulder and pulls me into her side. "I remember seeing him say something to you. But, I never would have guess that's what it was." Santana half whispers to me.
"It's been a great Thanksgiving. I am going to head up the bedroom to relax for the rest of the evening." Antonio announces.
"Sounds like a good idea." Santana's mom agrees. I still don't know where she stands with all of this. I know Santana's dad is on board. I've known that for a long time but I don't know about the rest of her family. There are so many factors to take into consideration.
Mrs. Lopez stands up from her recliner chair. She points over at her daughter. And then to me and back to Santana. "In light of this new information. You two will not be sleeping in the same room any longer."
"Mom." Santana whines. Robbie laughs. And I try to hide my blush by sinking further down into the couch cushions. Santana's mom is implying things that you don't ever want to hear your mother say.
"It's not like anything is gonna happen. You and dad sleep in the room next to mine." Santana whines. "It's not fair and we would have to move all of Brittany's stuff."
I didn't think Santana would put up such a fight. I thought she would just drop it and agree to her mom's terms.
"I understand." I say. "I think it's fair. If I were a boy your mom wouldn't let us stay in the same room. Even if we are on our best behavior." It's gonna suck being away from Santana during the night but I don't want to do anything to upset her parents. I will play by their rules.
"Britt." Santana whines.
Robbie gets up and leaves the room laughing. I'm sure this is all very comical to him.
I understand why Santana doesn't want to do this but it's for the best. I want to spend every day and night with her that I can. Our time spent together is few and far between in the past months. But this is what has to be done. I'm sad I can't sleep with Santana wrapped up in my arms but maybe one day things will be different.
"Thank you, Brittany. Goodnight girls." Santana's mom smiles at me.
"Goodnight." We say together.
When Santana's mom leaves the room she huffs and folds her arms over her chest.
"I know. I know. It sucks. But, I don't want to do wrong by your parents. And while I am in their house I will play by their rules."
"Whatever." Santana groans.
"Don't be mad at me." I lean into Santana and nuzzle my nose against her cheek. "It's just for a few nights. I'll come wake you up in the morning."
"You better be the first thing I see in the morning." Santana grumbles.
"You're kinda cute when your cranky."
Santana wrinkles up her face at me. I kiss her on the lips and then find her hand and tug her up off the couch.
"Let's go move my stuff."
As soon as I wake up I look at the clock. It's already ten minutes after eight. I rub my eyes and spring from my bed in the guest bedroom. I hope Santana isn't up yet. Or that her mom didn't wake her up or something like that.
I walk down the upstairs hall and knock lightly on Santana's bedroom door. I don't hear anything inside. I look down the hall in one direction and then the other. When I know no one is around I turn the doorknob and open the door slowly.
There, laying tangled up in the blanket, is a still sleeping Santana. I quietly shut the door and tiptoe over to the bed. I lift a corner of the bed sheets and slide into the bed, under the covers.
Santana shifts in her sleep but doesn't wake up fully. I inch closer to her, petting my fingertips over the skin of her forearm where it sticks out from under the covers.
"Santana." I whisper. "Wakey. Wakey."
She groans and rolls over onto her back. "Britt?" I can barely understand my own name when she says it.
"Yeah, babe. It's me. I'm here to wake you up." I whisper then lean in and kiss Santana's ear. "Do you know what today is?"
"Friday." A small smirk rises to Santana face.
"Yes, smartass. But, I was thinking more that it's the day after Thanksgiving."
"Yeah. So?" She opens her eyes and looks over at me.
"We can talk about Christmas plans now." I have been waiting for this day for about a month now. I have an idea of what I wish to happen at Christmas time but I need to hear Santana's take first and adjust my wishes.
"Britt, it's the day after Thanksgiving." Santana whines.
"I know. Have you thought about it at all?" I ask. I've been waiting and waiting for this day. "Cuz I have."
"Britt, do we have to do this now? I just woke up." Santana grabs the blankets and pulls them up to her chin.
"I just- I- okay. Sorry." I mumble. I can't help that I am excited. "But, will you at least think about it?"
"I will. I promise." Santana agrees.
"Sweet."
I look around the room for a few seconds before my eyes find their way back to Santana. Well, that of her that I can see. "What are you wearing under there?" I grab the edge of the blanket with one hand and tug on it.
"Britt." Santana whines as I try to pull the covers off of her. She has a strong grip though and I don't get very far. "Stop it." I jut out my bottom lip in my best pout. "Don't do that." Santana screws up her face at my pout.
"What can I do? Geez." I roll my eyes playful and roll away from Santana so that I'm on my side with my back to her.
"Hey. Come back here." She comes after me. Rolling over and wrapping an arm over my side and pulling me backwards until I flop unto my back again. Santana reaches up with her hand, her index finger jabs me in the forehead, before running it down in between my eyes, down my nose, and finally she grazes over my top lip and stops, holding her fingertip against my bottom lip. "No pouting." She says sweetly. "I can't stand it." She leans over me and presses her lips to mine.
"Hmm." I hum against her lips. "I missed those lips last night."
"I'm sure you did." Santana says before kissing me again. She licks over my top lip before sucking it between her two lips.
"Santana!"
"Shit." Santana jolts back away from me. "That's my mom."
"I know." I sit up on my elbows. "I'll let you get dressed or whatever it is you have to do and meet you downstairs." I get up and off the bed. I start walking to the door but stop once I get there, turn around to face Santana, and wink at her.
"Brittany." She scolds. I smile and make my way out. I still don't know if she doesn't like when I wink or if she likes it too much.
I use the bathroom and then head downstairs. Santana's parents are up and at their day already. Her mom is at the stove cooking something and her dad is reading the paper.
"How'd ya sleep?" Antonio asks when he sees me.
"Very good. Thank you. Anything interesting in the newspaper?"
"Not really." Antonio says, then takes a sip of his morning coffee.
"There's lots of adds." Santana's mom speaks up. "If you want to look through them. I'm going shopping later. You and Santana could come along."
"To do what?" Santana's voice says from behind me.
"Shopping, dear." Her mom fills in the part of the conversation that she missed.
I spin around to see Santana standing there with her hands on her hips. "Only if Brittany wants." She shrugs. Santana takes a few steps, closing the space between us. She puts a hand on my shoulder. "Morning." She says quietly and kisses me on the cheek.
Her mom watches the whole scene play out. I can see her out of the corner of my eye watching us. "Morning." I say keeping up the façade. Both Santana and I know that we can't let mommy and daddy know that we've seen each other already this morning.
Mrs. Lopez smiles and then ducks her head to her cooking. "I made pancakes." She announces.
Santana pulls away from me and goes over by her mom. "Smells good. Thanks mom." I follow her over there. Santana grabs a plate off the stack on the counter and I reach for one but she swats my hand away. "I'll get it." Santana gives me a look to tell me not to put up a fight. I don't. Her look also says go sit down I will take care of you.
I nod and go over to the table to claim a seat. A few seconds later Santana comes over with two plates of pancakes. She sets one down in front of me and the other in the spot next to me. I look up at her. "Thank you." I whisper. She smiles and takes her seat.
I look over at Santana as we approach her college. It's been another great few days spent with her. I wish that things were different and I didn't have to go back home today. I wish I could stay here and hide away in her dorm room.
The Thanksgiving holiday was great. Going to Santana's house in Ohio and spending time with her family was as awesome as I thought it would be. I was happy and relieved when Santana told her parents about us. It makes everything that much easier. I can, we both, can be more open and more affectionate. We don't have to worry about every look and every touch. It's a relief. I feel it and I think Santana feels it too.
"What?" She asks as Santana catches me watching her. She's sneaky. I don't know how she saw me. She's driving and hasn't taken her eyes off the road.
"Nothing."
"Come on. Tell me. It's got to be something." She glances over at me quick before returning her eyes out the windshield.
I sigh. "It's just that I don't want to go home. Can I just hide in your dorm? No one will know I'm there. I'm quiet."
Santana chuckles. "I wish. But you know you can't. And I wouldn't be able to focus on school if you were around all the time."
"I know."
"It won't be long though. We'll see each other at Christmas time. That's less than a month from now." Santana reasons.
I know this. I know that it's not long. I know that I have to. I have work to do too. "Yeah." I mumble.
"Hey." Santana reaches out her right hand. I take it instinctually. "Don't be so bummed. I want to see a happy Brittany."
I smile weakly. "Okay."
I play with Santana's hand for the last few minutes of our car ride together. I don't want to have to say goodbye again. Every time it gets harder and harder. When we get back to the parking lot for Santana's dorm she turns to me with a smile.
"I know you hate it." She says. It's like she can read my mind sometimes.
"I do."
"Come here." Santana tugs on my hand, pulling me closer to her, over the center console. She purses her lips and I lean into her for a quick but perfect kiss. Santana presses her forehead against mine and looks directly into my eyes. "You'll be fine. I'll be fine. We'll both be fine. Just remember that I love you and you love me and at the end of the day that's what really matters." She says it with such certainty.
"I know. You're right." I search her eyes for something, I'm not sure what. Doubt, regret, sadness maybe. But I don't find any of those things. All I can see is love, and strength, and confidence. "I just love you so much." I tilt my chin and press my lips to hers again. This kiss is longer, slower. I am trying to remember every parts of it, every part of Santana, so I can hold on to it until I see her again. I slide my hand up to cup her cheek and tilt my head to the side changing the kiss. Her lips are the most memorizing lips I've ever kissed. Just like every other part of her, they are wonderful. I grab her bottom lip between mine and tug on it before letting go. Her lip snaps back with a little pop.
I sit back a little so I can see her whole face. Santana is sucking that bottom lip into her mouth with a little sly expression. I stroke my thumb under her left eye, then over her lips.
"If I don't get out of your car right now, I might never." I mumble slinking back into my own seat and releasing my hand from her face.
Santana chuckles. "Right." In an attempt to help me she opens her drivers door and slides out of the car. I sigh and get out as well. I get my overnight bag out of the back seat and go over to my truck, that's parked three spaces away, and throw it on the passenger's side of the front seat. I shut the door and spin on my heels. Santana is standing a few feet away. She closes the distance and wraps her arms around my waist and lays her head against my shoulder. I lean into her and wrap my arms around her too.
We stand there for a long time just embracing each other. But when we break apart it doesn't feel like it was long enough. Santana takes a step back and I take a step forward. Then another and another as I walk around the truck and open the driver's door. I reach inside and turn the key in the ignition, starting the truck.
"Well." I say when I turn back to Santana. "It's getting late." I say uselessly. We drove from Santana's parent's house and it took up a majority of the day. It's mid-afternoon and I still have three more hours to drive.
"Yeah." She shrugs.
I wrap her up once more again in a tight hug. "I love you. I'll miss you. I'll call you once I get home."
Santana nods against my shoulder. "I love you, Britt-Britt." She mumbles. With a big intake of air Santana leans back.
I lean forward and kiss her one more time before I have to go. "I love you. I love you. I love you." I chant between every press of my lips to hers. I achieve my goal when Santana starts giggling after about a dozen little kisses in a row.
"Britt." Santana says through kisses and giggles. I kiss her firmly once more. I let her go for the final time and Santana takes a step back. "Bye, Britt. I love you." I jump in the truck before I start having second thoughts.
"Bye-bye beautiful." I wink and close the door.
Santana stands in the same spot and watches as I back the truck out of the parking space and drive away. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. Leaving her. I let out a long sigh as I watch her disappear in the rear-view mirror. I pull out of the parking lot and settle in for the long drive home