I apologize IMMENSELY for the lack of an update! I've had KILLER writer's block, but the muse struck once more!

Chapter 7

It was a mix of soft pain and vertigo that SAW experienced when he first came back online. He first became aware that there was a dull silence in the area, and then his optics came back online. After blinking a few times, he sat up, putting a hand to his head with a wince as he was hit with a dizziness that faded after a few moments. He looked around, and noticed that he was back in his room in the base. Confusion filled his mainframe; why was he here? He was supposed to be cleaning the base for Mikeala and Nathan's arrival...but then he had found...

Oh Primus....he had found Jazz. He had found Jazz and Ratchet had chased him out of the lab.....he had run into Thundercracker....then Starscream attacked.....and...

......And.....

SAW's mainframe seemed to freeze over with horror. Frenzy. ....Frenzy...........Frenzy had been......

"...No..."

Feeling his spark pulse frantically in his chest, SAW began to clench his fingers to his armor, making sharp sounds deep in his throat. The vision of Frenzy being reduced to nothing but a pile of twisted, shapeless metal in a smoldering crater stuck to his brain like it had been knifed into place; it wouldnt go away!

IT WOULDNT GO AWAY!!!

A protoform-shattering shriek wrenched itself from SAW's throat as he shot up from his recharge pad and uprooted it from the floor to violently hurl it at the wall. It bent and crunched to the ground, and SAW continued to scream as he slammed his fists into the wall and picked up anything else within his reach to tear apart or throw.

It didnt take long for the Autobots to become aware of the racket coming from the room. Optimus didnt wait for the automatic slide to open the door and instead tore it from its hinges in his hurry. "SAW!" he shouted over the racket, rushing over to attempt to calm his adoptive son down. SAW let out a shriek of rage and slammed his fist into Optimis's face, making the Autobot leader fly back into a wall from the sheer force of the blow. He barely had time to register that he had been hit before SAW turned to him and began pummeling the metal shards out of his leader.

The other Autobots came running in, and froze momentarily at the sight of their normally docile SAW violently assault their commander--and quite effectively, nonetheless. Finally, Barricade darted in and pulled SAW off of Optimus's nearly unconscious form.

"SAW!" He held on with all the strength he had as his spark mate thrashed and screamed in both English and Cybertronian, hurting from the physical and mental agony of losing Frenzy. "SAW, please! Please stop!"

"FRENZY!!!" SAW screamed, not acknowledging Barricade. "FRENZY!!!"

"Yes, I know, SAW!" Barricade yelled out over the screaming. "I know...!" He felt a jolt of agony in his own spark and nearly let go of SAW, but kept his hold regardless. He turned to the door. "BUMBLEBEE!!!"

Said Camaro rushed into the room, trying not to get hit by SAW. "Bumblebee, help me! Open his chest! Open his chest!" Bumblebee dodged another swipe from SAW and fumbled for the activator per Barricade's order. Just as he got SAW's chest open, he was slashed in the face by SAW's blade, effectively loosing an optic. But he didnt falter for an instant, and held onto SAW while Barricade opened his own chest, revealing his spark, and pulled SAW back to him, chest-to-chest.

A pulse echoed gently thorugh the room, and SAW fell quiet, making soft sounds and falling limp in Barricade's hold. Bumblebee ignored the sharp pain in his face and gently held SAW from behind, resting his head on SAW's shoulder, murmuring soft comforts in Cybertronian. With SAW safely stabilizing, Ratchet quietly slid into the room and pulled his leader out to safety to perform what he knew to be some minor surgery and to get things ready to fix Bumblebee's eye when said Camaro had his time with his charge.

It took a few minutes, but SAW finally calmed down completely and leaned his head tiredly on Barricade's shoulder. Barricade withdrew ever-so-slightly to close their chests, then gently brushed Bumblebee's arm to get his attention.

"Help me get him to our room, Bee," he said softly. Bumblebee nodded and stood up, helping rearrange SAW into Barricade's arms, and led them both to the conjoined room to set SAW down. SAW had fallen back into stasis by this point, and was quiet. Barricade gently brushed his hand over SAW's face and sighed with relief, then turned to Bumblebee. "You should have Ratchet take care of your optic," he remarked, gesturing to Bumblebee's face. The Camaro raised a hand to gently prod at the wounded area.

"It can wait," he replied, brushing his free hand against one of SAW's. Barricade nodded and sat down next to the recharge pad, and Bumblebee followed suit. "...It's not fair, Barricade....to him, and to you..."

"Your sympathy is appreciated, Bee," Barricade replied softly, putting his face in one hand tiredly. "...But I'm more concerned about the lack of fairness in SAW's life rather than mine...I've felt the pain of loss before, and...it helped repress the pain of this one with Frenzy....but he....he's never..."

"I understand," Bumblebee said. "We can only help him through this pain and make perfectly sure it never happens again...wha...?" He was cut off when he felt something tugging at his leg. He looked down and saw Honeydew peering up at him with her large golden optics. "...Honey...?"

Honeydew made a soft whimpering sound and tugged at his leg harder. Bumblebee gently picked her up and held her close to his chest. "Bee..." Honeydew whimpered, cuddling into him, "...Daddy?" Bumblebee gently stroked her back with one of his fingers.

"Daddy will be alright, Honey," he replied assuringly. "Sam....just needs some rest now....just a little quiet time...then he'll be all better..." He braced himself for the impending question, and he was not disappointed.

"....Zee-Zee.....?" Honeydew looked between Bumblebee and Barricade, who were exchanging looks of grief and wondering how to best put this for Honeydew. Finally, Barricade held out his hands and Bumblebee handed her over. Honeydew knew Barricade as her 'other-extra' father, courtesy of Zee-Zee, but now, Honeydew couldnt 'feel' Zee-Zee, but 'felt' 'Cade -Cade even stronger now. 'Cade-Cade would know where Zee-Zee was. She hugged his fingers and looked up at him. "...'Cade-Cade....where Zee-Zee?"

Barricade barely felt like he could tell her without vomiting up his own spark mid-word. But he took a moment to compose himself before speaking. "...Honey......Zee-Zee........Frenzy....is...not with us anymore..." Honeydew made a soft sound and hugged Barricade's fingers tighter.

"Where Zee-Zee go?" she asked, feeling her own 'sparkly' bump against her chest. It made her feel scared and sad. Barricade took another moment.

"...He--oh, Primus, give me strength--went where.....all sparks go....when they're not in a body anymore....."

Honeydew blinked softly. "...Like....went to see Primus?" Barricade shifted slightly. Explaining Cybertronian theology to a sparkling was a very tender subject.

"....Yes, Honey," he replied. He looked over to see Bumblebee with his face in both hands and his 'wings' twitching. "...Primus...is looking after Zee-Zee's spark now...because....Zee-Zee's spark is not with us anymore....do...do you understand...?"

Honeydew thought for a moment, then nodded slowly nodded. "...Zee-Zee...is with Primus now..." she relayed to Barricade, who nodded. She hugged Barricade's fingers even tighter. "...Why?"

Barricade made a strange sound in his vocals that Honeydew had never heard before, but the sound made her 'sparkly' hurt. "....Honey...do you remember.....Optimus telling you about the Decepticons?" Honeydew nodded. She remembered how Optimus was very solemn when he told her about them. "...Do you remember...about Starscream?" Honeydew nodded again and shuddered. She had heard very scary stories about that Decepticon. "Well....Starscream.......is why Zee-Zee went to be with Primus."

He paused and waited for any indication that Honeydew knew what he was talking about. After a few minutes of dead silence, Honeydew began to softly cry into his hand. Barricade held the sparkling to his chest, feeling like he too could 'cry' like his spark mate and his new 'step daughter'. From the looks of Bumblebee, the Camaro was the same way.

The three of them quietly released their angst in their own ways while SAW slept nearby. Nobody bothered them until the next morning.

I'm hoping that staved you off until the next chapter! It wont be long, I can promise, because Hell, I'm working on it right now!