Disclaimer: I still don't own the Mortal Instruments..

Enjoy!

CPOV

Max's funeral went well. Okay, as well as funeral can go. We cried, we ate, cried little more and talked with each other. Jace's hand was in my hand the whole time but I didn't mind. It belonged there.

I spent the rest of my time in NY with Jace. We did all the things that a normal teen-age couple usually do. We went to watch a movie, we ate in a fancy restaurant, we walked hand in hand and laughed at each other. But everytime I looked at Jace without him noticing I saw pain in his eyes. He missed Max. Of course he missed him. I missed him too. The look in Jace's eyes made my heart ache. It hurt to watch him hurting. And yet, I couldn't do anything to make him feel better. I could only be there for him when he needed me.

Sooner that I hoped, it was my time to go back to California. Maryse drove me to the airport with Jace. We said our good byes, kissed and hugged tightly. Then I watched, tears falling down on my cheeks, as they got back in Maryse's car and drove away. I took a deep breath and thought I'm going to see Jace again. But that didn't make me feel better.

I sat on my place in the plane and looked out of the window. It was dark and the plane was finally landing. I got out of the plane, pulling my small suitcase after me. I went outside to wait my drive. I saw a black Mercedes-Benz driving towards me. Ah, our personal driver Hodge. Hodge got out of the car and took my suitcase and put it in the car, then opened the backseat's door for me.

"Good evening Hodge. Where's my parents? Or Jon?"

"Good evening Miss Morgenstern. Your parents are on a business trip in Florida and your brother Jonathan is at his friend's house. He promised to be home when you arrive Miss."

I sighed. Of course they weren't home. We drove in a silence. I looked out of the dark tinted window as the houses went by fast. Finally I saw our huge mansion and our security guard opened the iron gates and Hodge drove inside. I got out of the car and waited as Hodge gave me my suitcase. I thanked him and went inside. I walked up the stairs and straight to my room. I left the door open and couple of minutes later Jonathan walked into my room. I got up and he took me in his arms.

"I missed you Clary. How's Jace? And the others? And how are you?" he asked.

"They're coping. But Jace's a mess. I can see the pain in his eyes when he thinks I'm not looking. I want nothing as much as I want to be there. Be there for him. You should've seen him when I got there. He just fell apart in my arms. I've never seen him crying and that night he wouldn't stop crying." I rested my head on his chest.

"I can only imagine. And what about you? How are you?" He asked as I lifted my head to look him in the eyes.

"I'm fine." I said looking away.

"Clary, you don't have to put that I'm-strong-and-nothing-ever-hurts-me- mask on with me. I know you're not okay. You're my little sister- I know when you're not okay." He looked at me concerned.

I bursted into tears. I couldn't keep all the pain inside anymore.

"This is killing me Jon. This whole thing is tearing me apart. I didn't want to leave Jace in NY, while I had to come here. I want to be in New York. At home. This isn't my home." I cried as he held me tightly in his strong arms.

"I know Clare. I know. I want to go home aswell." I rested his chin on the top of my head.

Jonathan'sPOV

Clary told me to call Jace. She said he would need a friend now. Like a guy friend. So I called him.

"Hello?" Oh man, I knew my friend well enough to tell he wasn't okay either. The pain in his voice, too, was clear.

"Hi man. It's Jonathan. You still remember me? Your only friend?" I laughed, trying to make him feel better.

"Oh, hi Jon. What's up man? Long time no see!"

"Oh I'm good. But I didn't call to talk about me. Clary told me you're pretty messed up."

"She told you that? Why would she say something like that?" Jace tried to cover up.

"Oh come on man. You know her. She can see through your mask. So don't be a pussy. Open up man, I'm here to listen."

Jace was quiet for a long time before I could hear him taking a deep breath.

"It's all my fault. I didn't want that to happen Jon. I never wanted Max to die. He died in my arms, God damn it! I should've save him. I don't know how, but I should have done something!"

"Jace, listen up. That was not your fault. How could it be. You two were in a wrong place at a wrong time. You can't blame yourself. I know you're missing him. I can hear it from your voice. You'll always miss him. He will always be in your heart. But you have to live with it. You know Max would want you to live your life happily. Without guilty." I said. Jace was quiet for a while again.

"I can see you're related to Clary, man. That's almost exactly what she said. But yeah, I know I can't blame myself, but I just can't help it. I hurts to think about him."

I took a deep breath. It was my time to tell his a story. A story even Clary didn't know. No, wait, she did know but didn't remember. She was so young back then.

"Okay. I'll tell you a little story. First of all, I have one question for you. Do you think I'm overprotective?" I asked.

"What? Are you overprotective? Over Clary? Yeah, maybe sometimes. Why?"

"What I'm going to say might make you realize why I'm that protective. Okay here it goes.. This happened when I was like seven years old. Clary was four, just turning 5 in few weeks. We had a little brother, Lucas. A year younger than Clary. I loved the two of them more than anything. Mom and dad were always at home and we were a really close family. One day Lucas had a high fever. Mom and dad didn't think it was anything special. But when Lucas didn't get up from his bed one morning, no matter how hard Clary was jumping on his bed. They slept in the same room and were inseparable. He just opened his eyes, but closed them soon after opening them.

Clary yelled to me to come to their room. Usually the two of them were running around the house like crazy. When I finally got to their room, I saw Clary sitting on her bed tears falling down on her cheeks. 'Clary what's wrong?' I asked her. 'Lucs doesn't want to play with Clary. He just lies there.' Clary said. Lucs was a nickname Clary had come out with. They were Lucs and Clay to each other." I laughed drily.

"So I went to get our parents. They came running and lifted Lucas out of his bed. They told me to dress up Clary and myself as fast as I could. I pulled a pair of gray sweatpants for her from her and Lucas' closet. I helped her zip up her winter jacket and told her to wait for me there. I ran to my room and pulled jeans and my winter jacket on.

I ran back to Clary and lifted her into my arms. She was little, even back them, so a seven-year-old me could lift her easily up and ran down the stairs to meet our parents fully dressed and Lucas in dad's arms. Mom had blankets and a bag in her arms so I had to take care of Clary. I helped her to put her shoes on and put my shoes on aswell. I ran, Clary still in my arms, in to our car. We drove to hospital and the nurses ran towards us. They took Lucas from dad and ran him inside. Mom went with them, but dad took Clary from me, to his arms, took my hand and we walked together inside. Dad put Clary down on a hard wooden chair and told me to wait with her. Not to leave her side for a moment. I did what I was told to. I stayed with her the whole day. Dad came occasionally to check that we were okay. He showed me where the kid's playroom was and bought us food.

I sat with Clary in the kid's playroom watching cartoons when mom and dad came to us. Mom's face and eyes were red from crying. I looked at dad and noticed that his eyes were red aswell. Dad never cried. Something was wrong, I knew it.

'Lucas was very sick and the doctor couldn't do anything to make him feel better. He had a really high fever, higher that it should've been. It was too much for him, he didn't have energy enough to make through it. So now your little brother is in much better place. He isn't in pain anymore and he's there with granny and grandpa. They'll take care of him.' Mom said hugging me and Clary close to her. Dad kneeled down aswell and we stayed like that for a while. Suddenly Clary asked 'Can I go to see Lucs?'. Mom and dad looked at each other and then dad said: 'Clarissa honey, Lucas isn't here anymore. He went away.' Clary looked confused and said: 'Why would Lucs do something like that. Why did he go away?' And they explained it to her, so that even a four-year-old could understand. 'So Lucs isn't coming back?' she asked and our parents shook their heads. Clary bursted into tears and I took her in my arms." I took a deep breath and blinked the tears away. One of them fell down on my cheek but I quickly wiped it away. Damn it, I don't cry.

"Since that day, I have always made sure that Clary is alright and has everything she needs. She's my whole world, since our parents began to fade away from us, few years after Lucas' death. Looking at us made them miss Lucas even more, I guess." I said and expected to Jace say something but he was quiet.

"Jace? You're still there?" I asked after a while.

"Oh, yeah, I'm right here. Okay, umm.. Oh man, I'm sorry dude... I.. I-I really don't know what to say.." Jace muttered.

"You don't have to say anything, I didn't tell that 'cause I want your pity or anything. I told that because I miss him everyday, I occasionally find myself thinking that he didn't deserve to die. He was just a three-year-old boy. But thinking about him doesn't hurt anymore. I can freely think about all the good memories I have with him, even though I was just seven years old back then.

But what I'm trying to say, is that it will hurt a while, maybe longer that it did to me, but one day you realize that it doesn't hurt that much anymore. But until then, I'm here for you, aswell is Clary. But this is hard for her too you know."

"Damn dude, I would've never thought you could make me cry. Not that I'm crying, no I don't cry. But I could cry. But I won't." He sighed and continued "I know this is tearing Clary apart. I can see it. I can hear it. She's trying to stay strong for me."

I talked to Jace for a long time. I had a feeling that he was going to be okay, someday. After we had ended the call I walked to Clary's room again, only to see it empty. I scrunched my eyebrows. Where's she? Ah, the music room. I walked to the other hallway on the same floor and stopped at the door frame, leaning against it.

Clary sat on the piano bench and played and singed If I die young by The band Perry.

If I die young, bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river, at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song

The sharp knife of a short life
Well, I've had just enough time

And I'll be wearing white when I come into your kingdom
I'm as green as the ring on my little cold finger
I've never known the loving of a man
But it sure felt nice when he was holding my hand

There's a boy here in town, says he'll love me forever
Who would have thought forever could be severed by
The sharp knife of a short life
Well, I've had just enough time

So put on your best, boys, and I'll wear my pearls
what i never did is done

A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singing
Funny, when you're dead how people start listening

(AN/ this isn't the whole song, I love this song and I was perfect for this chapter. Listen to it if you want!)

I took my guitar and sat next to her and played it along her playing. We played the rest of the song and sat in a silence for a while.

"I'll get us home, I don't know when, but I will get us back to New York. I promise." I said hugging her.

She just nodded.

3 months later

CPOV

I woke up groaning. I really didn't want to get up from my bed. Couple minutes later Jonathan was banging my door.

"I'm up, god damn it!" I yelled and heard Jonathan's laughter fading away. I slowly sat up and pushed the duvet out of my way. I opened my closet's door and sighed. I didn't want to make any effort to look nice. I didn't feel nice. I felt like shit. I missed Jace. I haven't seen him since Max's death.

I pulled out my Hollister's navy blue sweatpants and a plain white long-sleeved t-shirt. Mom and dad had said the previous evening that we would leave early in the morning. Where would we go? I had no idea. So I changed my shorts and tank top into sweatpants and the shirt. My hair I pulled into a messy bun and little mascara and I was ready. I took my backbag, where was my sketch pad and pencils, and went downstairs.

Everyone else was already eating early breakfast. Jonathan had sweatpants aswell along a black t-shirt. He was smirking at me like crazy.

"Okay what I'm missing here?" I asked looking first at Jon, then mom and dad. They all just smiled to me. I shook my head and sat down next to dad.

"Did you pack your things for a week? Clothes and something you'll need?" he asked and I nodded. I wondered where we're going.

"Where are we going?" I asked for like millionth time.

"You'll see in couples of days." dad smiled to me.

"Okayyy..."

We all ate our breakfasts and grabbed our stuff and packed into dad's big Mercedes-Benz GL- Class SUV. I thought that we would go somewhere that's near our home. How wrong was I? Really wrong. We drove the entire day. I mean literally. The whole day. Finally dad parked our car into some parking lot. It was a hotel's parking lot. I had no idea where were we so I decided to ask.

"Where the hell are we? Is this some kind of joke? I've been sitting in a car the entire day and now we're at some hotel middle of nowhere." I moaned.

"Oh no, we're not staying here. Just over the night. We'll drive the rest of the way tomorrow. Then you'll see where we're going." Mom said.

We walked into the hotel. It was fancy and I felt like I was underdressed. Which I probably was but I didn't care. All I wanted to do was sleep. The receptionist gave us our room keys and we decided who would sleep in same room. At the end in one room were Jonathan and I, and in the other room were mom and dad. They told us to meet them at their room at 10 am.

After showering I changed into my PJ's and crashed on the bed. Jonathan laughed and went to wash himself. I dug myself under the covers and closed my eyes.

Next time I opened them it was still dark and an annoying beep beeep beep beep was right next to my ear. I bolted up and tried to find the light switch, when I finally found it and turned the light on I had to blink few times. Jonathan was rubbing his eyes next to me and sat up aswell.

"What time is it?" He asked with husky voice. I would have thought it was sexy if he wasn't my brother. If Jace was here, instead of Jon, I would've definitely thought it was sexy. But he isn't. He's in New York. And I'm in the middle of nowhere.

I looked at my phone on the nightstand "It's 9:30 am. Why the hell it's still dark?"

Jonathan laughed and got up. He walked next to the window and opened curtains.

"Oh.. " I said blushing. "I don't remember you closing them."

"You were already asleep when I got out of the bathroom. It was too light for my taste so I closed the curtains." He laughed.

"Oh okay." I said laughing aswell. We changed into our sweatpants again and collected our other things and walked out of the room after making sure we didn't leave anything and walked to mom and dad's room. They were already waiting for us with brown paper bags and coffee cups in their hands. We were obviously eating them in the car.

"Did you sleep well?" Mom asked.

"Yeah.." We muttered together.

We were sitting in the car again. I had already eaten my breakfast so I just watched out of the window. Hours later mom turned in her seat to look at me and Jon on the backseat.

"Clary honey, we want this to be a surprise to you, so you have to be the rest of the ride with this scarf on your eyes." she said.

I lifted my eyebrows but didn't protest. I felt so stupid. I was sitting in a car with a scarf on my eyes. Yes, that's something I've always wanted to do. I couldn't even draw.

Finally, I mean FINALLY the car stopped and I heard my door opening. Somebody unbuckled my seat belt and pulled me out of the car. I felt two strong hands on my shoulders and I smelled way too familiar scent to me. No. It can't be.

"C'moon Jon, this isn't fun anymore. Can I just take this damn scarf off?" I asked.

"I'm not Jonathan. And yes, you can." My heart dropped to my knees. My hands were faster than my mind and suddenly all I saw was gold. Golden hair, amber eyes, golden skin. And what did I do? My knees didn't want to carry me anymore so a fell on to my knees on the ground. And what else did I do? I bursted into tears.

Jace sat down on the ground aswell and pulled me into his lap. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him with passion. He kissed me back and then pulled away to look at me. I saw tears falling down his cheeks aswell. I wiped them off and nuzzled my face into his neck.

Five minutes later we got up. My family was still in the car and were smiling to us. Dad came out of the car and hugged me, then Jace. Mom and Jonathan did the same.

"Welcome back Mr. and Mrs. Morgenstern." Jace smiled. I looked at him confused and he just smiled to me. Finally I looked around myself. We were at our New York house. No, this is too good to be true. I looked at mom and dad.

"Yeah, we're moving back to New York. Permanently, this time." Mom said smiling.

YAY! They're back! Yes, I know. It happened pretty fast but I wanted them to move back. I don't like the idea of separating Clary and Jace, so I did it quickly... :) But do you think this all happened too fast? Clary and her family were in Cali like little over 6 months. It's December in this story right now.

Reviews, please :) Tell me what you think. Loved it? Liked it? Didn't like it? Hated it? And WHY? Why did you love/like/didn't like/hate it? THANK YOUUUU :3

And thank you for your reviews, I love them!

PS. I don't own the song either... :/ It belongs to The Band Perry

/justbeautifullme33