Ok so it's been like almost three weeks...I'm sorry! School has just been a lot more demanding than I thought it was going to be. In my Dreams, Delirium, and Disaster class we're reading the first volume of In Search of Lost Time by Marcel Proust and let me tell you, Proust is a difficult read. However, we're almost done with it so hopefully I'll be able to spend more time working on this fic so I can update faster.

Anyways, I hope you guys aren't too mad at me for making you wait so long. I hope you enjoy it, and please review!

I still don't own Naruto, if I did I wouldn't have to read Proust.


The Morning After

Are you going to be sulking like this all morning? Inner Sakura asked irritably.

Sakura purposefully ignored her subconscious and poured herself a cup of coffee.

I got a little carried away last night, so what? Inner Sakura snapped. I mean it's not like I was the only one. You were the one who ultimately decided to pose in the nude; I was just going with the flow.

"Don't put all this on me!" Sakura cried outrage.

"Who are you screaming at?" asked a voice asked from behind Sakura. The medic-nin whirled around at the unexpected intrusion and came face-to-face with Neiji. The said Hyuuga was fixing her with a look that clearly said he was questioning her sanity.

Mr. Stick-In-The-Mud seems to look at you like that a lot doesn't he? Inner Sakura asked, smirking.

"How the hell did you get in?" Sakura asked, slightly panicked by the unexpected visit.

"Through the front door," he answered as if it was the most obvious answer in the world and poured himself a cup of coffee. "I rather enjoyed the coffee you made yesterday morning and decided that I would like to have another."

"And what would you have done if I was still asleep or if there was no coffee?" Sakura asked, adjusting her robe more securely around herself and crossing her arms over her chest.

"I would have waited until you made some," Neiji replied coolly, closing his eyes and enjoying the first sip of the fresh brew.

"Of course you would have," Sakura mumbled. Although she was not in the best mood, and his visit was unexpected, Sakura was pleased by Neiji's continued ease around her. She could get used to this if it became a routine.

"So where is the portrait Sai drew for you?" Neiji asked, cutting into her thoughts.

"Umm…" Sakura blushed and hurriedly tried to think of an excuse. She had no intention of showing that portrait to anyone, least of all Neiji. It was bad enough that she had gotten him drunk one night, she didn't want to show him what she looked like naked, even if it was for artistic purposes.

I don't think Mr. Stick-In-The-Mud's reputation would be able to take it, Inner Sakura sniped wickedly. On the other hand, she continued grinning devilishly, He might actually like what he sees…

Neiji watched Sakura's cheeks flush to such a deep crimson, he was almost afraid that she had broken out into a sudden fever. "Are you feeling well?"

"I'm fine," Sakura said hurriedly as she scrambled to recover herself. "The portrait didn't turn out so well, so we scrapped it."

"That's a shame," Neiji said.

Silence filled the room as Sakura watched Neiji continued to drink his coffee. She sighed inwardly, wishing that she could tell him what really happened between her and Sai last night, but somehow she thought the Hyuuga wouldn't be interested in what was clearly girl-talk. Sadness squeezed her heart painfully as she realized just how much she missed Ino. Ino would be the perfect person to tell something as confusing and embarrassing as this, especially since the blonde kunoichi also admired Sasuke. Surely Ino would be able to understand her feelings and might be able to explain why she was projecting Sasuke's image onto Sai. Maybe she should stop by the flower shop and see if she could…

You will NOT lower yourself by seeking advice from Piggy, Inner Sakura commanded. If female companionship is what you need, you can always confide in me…

Sakura snorted at her subconscious's suggestion and was greeted with a confused look from Neiji. Speaking of female companionship…

"When was the last time you hung out with Tenten?" Sakura asked suddenly.

The question threw Neiji off-guard. He was seriously considering taking her to the hospital to be examined when she had asked him what he thought was a completely random question. "Let's see," he said seriously considering the question, "Probably not for a few weeks. Maybe around the same time you joined our team."

"Don't you think you should go and see her?" Sakura asked curiously.

"Why?" Neiji countered.

"Because I'm sure she misses you. Didn't the two of you always used to train together when you were on Team Guy?"

"I see your point," Neiji said finishing his coffee and placing the empty cup in the sink. "I guess it would be a good idea to see her, especially since we will be leaving for that mission soon."

"Have you heard anything about it?" Sakura asked.

"No, but we do have a meeting with Kakashi later this evening. I'm sure he'll brief us then." Neiji made his way towards the door. "Thank you for the coffee, I'll see you later."

"Tell Tenten I said hi," Sakura added as she watched Neiji leave.

"I will," Neiji said quietly. He considered the implications of that statement. He knew that like everyone of the Konoha 11, Tenten had been furious with Sakura's betrayal, but he wondered what the weapons mistress thought now. Did she still harbor a grudge? If she did, he was sure that he could convince her to let it go. He could tell that Sakura desperately needed a girl to talk to. He knew there were some things that only another woman could relate to, and since Ino was dead set against her, Sakura needed to find a new close female friend. He hoped he could make it happen for her.

"I'll see you later," Sakura called as Neiji opened the door.

"Shikamaru, you're up early," Neiji said as he stepped outside and held the door for the lazy genius. "You should try Sakura's coffee, it's amazing."

"Great for getting rid of a hangover, right?" Shikamaru teased.

"You'll never let that go will you?" Neiji asked, sighing dejectedly.

"Absolutely not," Shikamaru countered. "I'll see you later at the meeting,"

Neiji nodded and walked off, intent to find Tenten and hopefully secure a female friend for his team mate.


"So what brings you out of bed so early in the morning?" Sakura said, pouring both herself and Shikamaru coffee.

"Kakashi-sama wants to meet with us this evening," Shikamaru said, accepting the offered mug.

"Neiji told me," Sakura said taking a sip. "But I somehow doubt that's the reason you're here."

Shikamaru gave her a knowing smile, "Can't a guy just check in with his fellow team mate?"

"You're too lazy to not do anything without a purpose," Sakura commented, rolling her eyes.

"You wound me," Shikamaru feigned.

Sakura smiled playfully.

"In all seriousness though," Shikamaru began, adorning a bored look, "Kakashi-sama will want to make sure that we've settled our differences before he determines us ready for this mission. As team leader, I just want to know how do you feel about your relationship with us?"

"How do I feel?" Sakura asked. That was a question that had haunted her while she stayed in the hospital. Her doctors had asked her that question over and over until she had snapped at failing to find an answer that seemed to satisfy their question. She had gone catatonic to escape that never-ending question, and its ability to force her to analyze herself and awaken the feelings that she struggled to suppress. "I feel fine."

"I see," Shikamaru said, clearly unconvinced. "So tell me what happened between you and Sai last night," Shikamaru said, folding his arms across his chest boredly.

"There's nothing to tell," Sakura answered carefully.

"Funny," the lazy genius said with a grin, "Sai told me the same thing."

"Then why are you asking me if you already talked to him?" Sakura asked irritated.

"I wanted to gain your perspective," he shrugged.

Why not just tell the Lazy Bum what happened? Inner Sakura surmised. It'll get rid of him and his questions, and you won't need to seek female companionship since you'll have this problem off your chest.

"Things between Sai and I are not resolved yet," Sakura admitted quietly. "In fact, I think they might be worse."

"Worse? What did you do, mistaken him for Sasuke?" Shikamaru asked jokingly. The stoic look he received from Sakura wiped the grin right off his face. "You didn't."

"I just got caught up in the moment and it slipped out and then it all just kind of got…complicated," Sakura explained in an awkward rush.

"You need to work this out before Kakashi-sama's meeting tonight," Shikamaru said seriously.

"I know but I'm not sure how," Sakura said, closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration.

"Well you better figure it out and fast," Shikamaru said grabbing her wrist and beginning to lead her out of the kitchen. Sakura barely had time to place both of their empty mugs on the counter before the Lazy Bum, as her subconscious so lovingly called him, shoved her out the door.

"Shikamaru, I'm still in my PJ's!" Sakura objected loudly as he led her down the street.

"You look fine," he answered, risking a glance and sighing in relief that she was just wearing a blank tank top and matching sweatpants. He would have felt ridiculous if he had dragged her out of her apartment and failed to notice her in risqué sleepwear. As he continued to lead the medic-nin, he was oblivious to the hostile crowd around them, lost in thought with the predicament of his team's fragile relationship.

He knew that Sai cared for Sakura, or at least felt something that resembled caring. He knew Sai had been really upset with what Sakura had done, not just catching him by surprise and knocking him out, but the attempt at suicide as well. He assumed that the usually stoic-nin was probably confused by his conflicting feelings over the pink-haired kunoichi and had most likely said some rather careless things. However, he did wonder about the details of Sakura's part in the fiasco that occurred last night, but he was too squeamish to ask for her to elaborate. As they stopped in front of Sai's door, Shikamaru silently hoped that the two would be able to settle whatever awkwardness that transpired quickly. He didn't think Kakashi would be patient enough to wait for another week.


"What do you want?" Sai greeted coldly.

You would think that the Lazy Bum would have at least had the courtesy to explain what's going on to Heartless instead of just knocking and abandoning us like that, Inner Sakura grumbled.

"We need to talk," Sakura answered, pushing her way into his apartment. Betting that the living room would be safer than the bedroom, Sakura quickly sat down on the couch and waited for Sai to give her his full attention. "Besides, weren't you the one who said that once my team affiliation was determined we could talk about team dynamics?" she asked dryly.

Sai's face remained blank, unaffected by Sakura's use of his own cruel words against him. "Did you want to talk about last night?" he asked innocently, sitting down on the couch and turning to face her.

"Of course I want to talk about last night, we need to be able to prove to Kakashi-sama that we are a unified team today and we can't do that if things remain the way they are between us," Sakura said.

"Isn't it funny how things have changed," Sai began coldly. "When I first joined Team 7, I was the one struggling for your acceptance. Now you've joined my team, and you're struggling for my acceptance."

Heartless certainly isn't going to make this easy is he? Maybe fucking him would have been the less complicated route after all, Inner Sakura commented.

"I don't exactly know what you want from me, Sai. I—"

"No Sakura," cut in Sai, "I am not the issue here, you are. I know that I may say things that are not socially acceptable, but that is because I am just now starting the socialization period of my life that was denied to me as a child. However, contrary to what you might think, I do have feelings, and you manipulated them last night because you still can't get over Sasuke. I don't understand it, why do you keep destroying your life and your relationships with other people for someone who could care less about whether you live or die? Why can't you look at me and see me instead of some ghost from your past? I meant what I said, I am not Sasuke Uchiha. When will you realize that I'm more than just his replacement to Team 7?"

Sakura cringed as Sai's tone had changed from cold and emotionless, to heated and desperate. She felt horrible that she was the cause for his emotional confusion because of her foolish and selfish attachment to Sasuke. She had thought that Sai's friendship would have been the most difficult to win back because they were team mates, and she had deceived and attacked him. She had no idea that the real reason why she would have such a hard time was because every time she looked at him she thought of Sasuke. She thought back to the crude question he had asked her last night and realized that he had intended that question to help her decide what the motives of her actions were last night. Was she really trying to improve their friendship, or was she just trying to play out her obsession with Sasuke by transferring her feelings onto Sai?

Wow, Heartless actually does have a point doesn't he? Inner Sakura asked. See, I told you last night wasn't my fault. Who would have thought that Heartless would be pleading my case for me?

"You're right," she said finally, addressing both her team mate and the voice in her head. "I'm sorry I've been so unfair to you." She looked up at Sai, tears streaming uncontrollably from her eyes. "Will you ever be able to forgive me?"

Sai stared at her shocked. He didn't mean to make her cry. He knew that the pink-haired kunoichi had suffered enough, but she had to understand that she had brought the pain upon herself. It seemed that she was finally realizing that now, but he wondered if it would really change anything. If he granted the absolution she so desperately needed, would she mend her ways? He doubted that she would renounce her love for Sasuke, but that's not what he wanted was it? No, what he really wanted was the genuine friendship that they had always lacked. He wanted her to help socialize him, and in return, he would help ease the pain she was always so intent to inflict on herself.

Coming to a final decision, Sai did something completely unexpected and out of character. He wrapped his arms around the medic-nin and whispered in a comforting voice, "I forgive you, Sakura-chan."

The relief that filled Sakura's heart was so overwhelming that she began to cry even harder, sobbing uncontrollably into Sai's shoulder.

"Thank you. Thank you. Thank you," she repeated over and over, like a mantra that would protect her from making the same mistake twice and confuse Sai with Sasuke.

Sai kept embracing Sakura, letting her cry all over him until she had regained control of herself. He knew that she hadn't gotten rid of all the pain that she was intent to carry within her, but he was glad that she had allowed him be a friend and grant her relief, even if it only was temporary.

He hoped Naruto would be happy at least, the Jinchuriki had entrusted Sai with taking care of Sakura. Although Sai knew he had failed when he allowed his resentment to hold him back from confronting Sakura when they first returned from their mission and settle their differences, and the result had led to her almost successful suicide and a deteriorated mental state, he hoped that the ramen loving-nin would see that Sai was trying to better things now. He had given Sakura his forgiveness, but he hoped that both she and Naruto would be able to forgive him for his part in the pink-haired kunoichi's current sad state.


So tell me what you think! Reviews make reading Proust easier, you all do want me to get a good grade right ;)