In Buffy's slightly messy room the next morning, the young Slayer still slept. Until the alarm clock went off. She slapped it with her hand hard enough that it smashed under her strength. "Oh! Oops! Oh... " Buffy sat up. "Mm..."
In the kitchen, Joyce was making fresh-squeezed orange juice. Buffy came dancing in singing and wearing her cheerleader outfit. "Macho, macho, man! I want to be a macho man. Macho... Oh, hey, juice!" She grabbed a glass of fresh OJ and drank it. "Mm... Quality juice. Not from concentrate!"
Joyce glanced at her. "You're in a good mood," she observed.
"I am! I'm on the squad, which is great, 'cause I feel like cheering and leading others to cheer. Ooo, hey, juice!" Buffy took a second glass and drank again.
"Listen, honey, about yesterday, I really..."
"Mm! That is totally yester. Besides, it's not like you were wrong, y'know. I did get kicked outta school. I'm just wacky that way!"
"Still, I just want you to know that, despite the problems you've had, I really..."
Buffy cut her off, "Mom, you just don't get it. And, believe me, you don't want it. Y'know, there are just some things about being a Vampire Slayer that the older generation..."
"A what?"
"It's a... long story."
"Buffy, are you feeling well?"
"What? Oh, I'm, I'm fine, y'know? What, like, I can't be in a good mood? Is it, like, a new house rule? Fine, y'know? It's just fine, fine, fine, 'cause..." She broke out in song. "I'm a macho, macho man! I want to be a macho man!" She bobbed her head. "Macho, macho man!" She left the kitchen. "I want to be a macho man!"
Ms. Calendar entered the teacher's lounge and nearly sprayed her coffee everywhere. She forced herself to swallow. "Oh, wow." She approached Giles. "Book man crawled out of his cave."
"Ha ha." Giles sneered.
"Really, though. You're not in the library, for once. Congrats! You're moving up!"
A few other teachers in the room snickered.
"So, what, did you just wake up this morning and think, 'I think I'm going to embarrass the librarian today. Just for fun.'?" Giles asked.
"No...but I am surprised to see you here. And now that you mention it, it is fun."
"Glad to be your source of entertainment," Giles stated sarcastically.
"Well, I could have just sprayed my coffee all over that tweed suit of yours, 'cause I almost did...On second thought, I could have choked to death, too. You'd really like that, wouldn't you?"
Giles took off his glasses and cleaned them with his tie. "I hope that was rhetorical, because no matter how I answer, I'm cursed to be embarrassed yet again."
"Lucky you, I don't want to know the answer." She took another drink of her coffee.
Giles put his glasses back on.
"Have I told you you're funny?"
"No...but I'm guessing it's unintentional."
"Well, you are. Funny, I mean."
"Th-thank you...I-I think."
"You know I'm going to keep on bugging you all morning until school starts, right?"
Giles sighed. "Yes." Not that he really minded. He wasn't going to let her catch on to that, though. After all, where would the fun in that be, for either of them?
During lunch, Ms. Calendar stopped by the library once more. "Still haven't heard from Buffy?"
"Nope."
"Willow? Xander?"
"Twice, no."
"Hmm...do you think the witch caught on and cast one of the spells we found last night?"
"Quite possibly."
"So, what are you going to do?"
"What can I do, other than wait? I have no way of knowing if she is in any immediate danger. If they need help, they'll come."
"...I just realized something."
"What's that?"
"There's a game today. If Buffy's the first alternate as Xander said, she probably got called into the team."
"And...would that be safe, or dangerous?"
"Could go either way, depending on who our mystery witch is."
"So I should stay after hours, I presume."
"Don't you already?" Ms. Calendar smirked.
"I do believe you've done your fair share of staying after, as well," Giles retorted.
"Then we'll stay after school, see if our assistance is required."
Giles nodded. He was sure, by this point, that Jenny was aware of just how much she flustered him. Especially with that evil little smirk of hers.
I'm going to have to make the first move, Jenny Calendar realized. I'm going to have to make the first move, because he's to-to British to notice that I like him.
In the gym during cheerleading practice, Buffy was positioned next to Joy in the lineup.
Joy chanted loudly, "Five, six, seven, eight!"
The cheerleaders began practicing a routine.
"Turn up the music!" Buffy was enthused.
The routine continued until Buffy accidentally stomped on Joy's foot.
"Ow!" Joy yelled. "We have a game in less than four hours!"
Xander and Willow entered the gym.
Buffy started jumping with glee. "Willow! Xander! My buds are here! I love my buds! Hi!" She noticed everyone staring. "Hi... Oh..." She got back in line, and the routine continued.
Xander asked Willow, "Is it me, or is Buffy a bit looped?"
Willow cast a worried gaze Buffy's way. The cheerleaders continued with a series of assorted cartwheels. "We better get her outta there."
"Yeah, before she..."
Buffy overthrew Joy's aerial, sending her crashing into the gym wall.
"...hurts someone." Xander finished. "Ay..."
Joy got up as Buffy came running over.
"Did I do that?"
Joy pushed Buffy. "You are so out of here!"
Willow and Xander came running up and each grabbed one of Buffy's arms.
"It's not her fault!" Willow cried.
"She's on medication," Xander hoped that would explain Buffy's loopy behavior.
"What?" Buffy screached.
"Well, obviously not enough," Joy scoffed. "Who's our next alternate?" She saw Amy. "Oh. Amy, you just made cheerleader."
"No, no, no. You don't want her, she's a wi..."
Xander quickly clamped his hand over Buffy's mouth. "A wise choice indeed!" He and Willow pulled Buffy away, nodding and casting nervous smiles at Amy and Joy. Amy stared after them.
Willow and Xander were supporting Buffy between them as the left the gym and went into the hall.
"She's a witchy!" Buffy finished her earlier statement.
"Buffy..." Willow didn't like the odd behavior.
"I just got kicked off the team, didn't I?"
"I don't think it was your fault," Xander offered supportingly.
"Hmm, I know you don't, that's 'cause you're my friend. You're my Xander-shaped friend!" Buffy leaned her head on his shoulder. "Do you have any idea why I love you so, Xander?"
"We gotta to get her to a..."
Xander cut Willow off with a gesture. "Let her speak!"
"I'll tell you! You're not like other boys at all."
"Well..."
"You are totally, and completely one of the girls!" She spoke to Willow. " I'm that comfy with him."
Willow smiled widely.
"That's great." That hadn't exactly been what Xander had been hoping to hear.
"Any other guy who'd give me a bracelet, they'd... wanna date me, and be like a..." Buffy began to feel woozy. "Oh! I, I don't feel so good."
"Buffy?" Willow was even more worried.
Buffy collapsed into their arms.
In the library, Buffy was lying back in a chair with a wet cloth on her forehead.
Willow supported her head, keeping the cloth in place with her hand. "We've gotta get her to a hospital!"
"They can't help her," Ms. Calendar stated.
"This is a bloodstone vengeance spell," Giles took Buffy's pulse. "Hits the body hard like a, a quart of alcohol, and then it e-eradicates the, uh, immune system."
"A vengeance spell, like she's trying to get even with Buffy?" Xander asked.
"'Cause she knows I know she's a witch."
"The others she just wanted out of the running. You she intends to, um..." Ms. Calendar didn't want to finish the sentence.
"Kill?" Buffy finished it for her.
"How much time do we have?" Willow asked.
Giles stuttered, "Oh, uh, I'm sure, uh..."
"Truth. Please."
"Couple of hours... Three at most." That was a hard idea for Giles to grasp. Sure, Slayers always died young, but not usually after only three weeks of duty.
"Well, how do we reverse the spell?" Xander asked.
Giles stood up. "Well I, I've been researching that - well, J-Jenny and myself, and, uh, we can reverse all the spells if, um..." He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. " ...we can just lay our hands on, on Amy's spell book." By that point Xander and Willow had keyed the adults in on the results of the test.
"And if we can't get a hold of it?" Willow asked.
"Well, the other way is to cut the witch's head off," Ms. Calendar stated simply.
Giles put his glasses back on.
"Show of hands!" Xander raised his hand.
"It's not Amy's fault. She only became a witch to survive her mother," Buffy insisted.
Xander spoke to Buffy, "Look, I don't care why, I just care that you go on breathing."
"Giles, Ms. Calendar, where would she be casting these spells?" Buffy asked.
"Oh, she needs a, a sacred space. A-a-a pentagram, um, large pot," Giles fumbled through the answer.
"Her home. Okay. Help me up." Xander and Willow helped her up. "We'll just go to her house and we'll get her book."
"Okay, we'll go with you," Willow said.
"Uh, no! You guys stay here and keep an eye on Amy," Buffy ordered.
Giles took Buffy from Xander and Willow and into his own arms. "And keep her away from the science lab. We'll need it to cast our counter-spells."
"Rupert?" Ms. Calendar asked.
"Yes?"
"Do you want me to go with or stay here?"
Giles thought. "Um, stay here. Too many adults would simply make the parent not want to let us in. B-Besides that...with how powerful Amy is, we need a-as many eyes on her as possible." He then left the library, Buffy in arms.
Ms. Calendar giggled when they were out of sight. He had no idea how naughty his parting words sounded.
Willow and Xander exchanged worried looks. Xander sighed.
After twenty minutes, give or take, Giles' old Citroen pulling up at Amy's house. Inside, Catherine had a plate of brownies on her lap. She took a bite out of one. Giles knocked on the door. Catherine looked up, startled. Giles knocked some more. Buffy was very tired and out of it. Catherine slid the plate under the coffee table and got up. Giles knocked again.
Catherine opened the door. "Who are you? Wha, um, uh, is there something wrong?"
"Mrs. Madison, we need to talk to you about your daughter," Giles answered.
"I'm not allow... You'll have to come back later." She tried to close the door, but Giles prevented her and pushed his way in.
"Excuse me!" Still had to be polite. English habit.
"What?"
Giles turned to help Buffy. "You alright?" He looked for a place to sit her down. "Um, in here." He lead Buffy into the living room. To Catherine, he said, "Your daughter is meddling with something very dangerous, are you aware of that?" He sat Buffy on the couch.
"Uh, I don't know what you're talking about."
"Oh, I think you know only too well."
"You've got to go. She's gonna be home soon, and you..."
Giles interrupted, indicating to Buffy. "This girl is very sick." He got angry. Very angry. "Now you will shut up and you will listen to me! Your daughter has access to some very powerful magicks, and somehow your obsession with cheerleading has made..."
Catherine interrupted, incredulous, "I don't care about cheerleading! It's not my fault she's doing stuff."
Buffy saw the brownies and began to realize who Catherine really was.
"As her mother you should assume some responsibility for her actions," Giles went on.
Catherine laughed. "Well, you know, these kids today! I..." She calmed down a bit. "She's out of her mind. Ever since dad, her dad... left I can't control her."
Buffy slowly got up
"You're afraid of her?" Giles was sympathetic, now.
"Amy?" Buffy asked.
Catherine looked at Buffy and realized she had been found out. Giles looked at Buffy, puzzled.
"Are you Amy?" Buffy asked.
Giles looked back at Catherine. "I don't understand.
"She switched! She switched your bodies, didn't she?"
Catherine looked down, defeated.
The truth finally dawned on Giles. "Good Lord!"
"She wanted to relive her glory days," Buffy stated.
Catherine looked back up. "She said I was wasting my youth. So she took it.
