Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts, its characters or storyline. These ditties are mine, as are Duke and McCallister. Time for another round of super special awesome potato casserole to my lovely reviewers! You guys rock!

..:-X-:..

052 – CPR

Thump. Thump. Thump.

The pressure on his chest kept coming back. It would ease away, then return, like a punch to the ribs. Then something warm and soft would cover his mouth briefly, pushing air down his throat. Then back to the pressure. Whoever was doing that needed to cut it out. It was really getting annoy—

Water suddenly rushed up his throat and Leon choked back to life, involuntarily trying to expel water and take in oxygen at the same time, threatening to drown in his own lungs. Hands gripped his shoulders, rolling him onto his side and holding him there. He coughed and gasped, throwing up what felt like a quart of water before lapsing into desperate heaves for air.

"Oh thank God…Easy, easy…" He heard someone over the pounding of his heart in his ears.

As less of his brainpower was starved of oxygen, more awareness was delegated to the situation. His breathing slowly regulated and he realized he was on solid ground and soaking wet…but he couldn't piece together what had happened…but he could hear water sloshing around somewhere close.

"You…have got to stop…making a habit of this." He recognized it was Tifa who had been speaking.

With more effort than he cared to admit, he rolled back onto his back and looked up at her. She was on her knees beside him, equally soaked and out of breath, though the fear running rampant in her eyes was new. He shifted, making sure all of his arms and legs were still attached, and looked back up at her from the ground.

She shook her head in dismay, "How many times…am I going to have to…save you?"

He coughed lightly, "Water—"

"Yes, very observant." She grunted, the panic quickly receding from her eyes. "Are you okay?"

He rubbed one hand over his eyes. "Fantastic."

..:-X-:..

053 – Beautiful

When Tifa walked in, long hair in a fancy up-do and wearing a long, slinky dress, Leon did a shameless double take. It was the color of red wine and had a long slit running up one thigh, coupled with being practically backless and being held up by the single halter strap around her neck, barely.

"What's the occasion?" He asked mildly, flipping through the latest reconstruction report.

Tifa swiveled toward him on her pointed heels, "Guh, some fancy party that the board of directors on the Council invited me to. It'll be good for PR…plus there's an open bar."

He grunted at that, forcibly tearing his eyes back to the report. "Oh, I thought maybe the economy had finally gotten so bad that you were going to sell your body on the street."

Tifa cocked one hip and glared at him. "I could put your eye out with one of these heels. Don't tempt me." She threatened.

He shook his head and smirked at her. Looking un-amused, she shifted the strap of her dress, making sure everything was where it should be, before looking at him.

"Do I really look like a hooker?" She asked.

He sat back and took full advantage of the opportunity to scope her out. "No."

Tifa bobbed her head, "Good."

"They prefer to be called escorts."

She threw her hairbrush at him. "Jerk."

He ducked the flying hairbrush. "Hope you treat your clients better than that."

She huffed and marched out, slamming the door behind her. As soon as it closed, the smirk slid off Leon's face and he stared at the door blankly for a moment. On the floor by the couch, Duke gave a small bark. Snapping back to himself, he looked to the dog, blinking away the image of Tifa in that dress.

"Wow." He exhaled in slight awe…and immediately dropped his head to the table with a dull thunk.

..:-X-:..

054 - Prank War 5

"Oh, come on, it's fun." Tifa's voice was high and squeaky.

Leon just grunted, picking up balloon after balloon and violently popping them with a thumbtack. For the past ten minutes, they had been breaking down the balloons that Tifa had stashed in his office earlier that morning. Well, Leon was breaking them. Tifa was just sucking the helium out of them.

Tifa giggled, a high pitched, hyper-sounding noise, and let the balloon go. It fluttered around the room as it deflated, landing with a soft pah on top of Leon's computer monitor. Leon just slowly lifted his eyes from the balloon carnage and gave her a flat look.

"You're kind of a grump, you know that?" She chirped, taking up another balloon.

"And you're a child." He replied lowly, popping the balloons mercilessly.

Tifa smiled and popped a few balloons with a paperclip before sighing. "I've been stuck in my office all day. If I didn't stuff your office full of balloons, I was going to go insane."

"And the…" He pointed to the trash can, where he'd thrown away all of the silly string she'd coated him with.

"Drunk with power." She excused, untying the bottom of another balloon and holding it closed, offering it. "Come on…Just try it once."

"No." Leon sat back. "I think we should call a truce."

"Truce? You're the one who started this." Tifa said, crossing one leg over the other as she held the balloon.

He shrugged. "So? Truce?"

She gave him an even look. "It would be nice not to have to check my office for glue, water, and stink bombs every time I come in." She shrugged. "All right, sure, truce."

She put her mouth over the end of the balloon and inhaled deeply, watching the balloon shrink in her hands.

A knock came to Leon's closed door and Leon opened his mouth, but Tifa beat him to it.

"Come iiiiiiiin!" She announced in her helium-affected voice.