Within the confusion and all the noise
there is stillness.

"Watch this Mom!"

Peyton Sawyer walked out onto the back patio and smiled at her daughter's antics, laughing when, Sawyer faked to her right and drove pass her opponent to the hoop for a lay-up; all with an ease that screamed she was truly a Scott.

Her laughter grew as Sawyer pumped her fist in the air, a smile on her face, curls swaying with her movement, in triumph as a shocked Lucas Scott watched on. It wasn't an unusual scene really, Lucas and Sawyer playing a little one-on-one in the backyard. It had been happening a lot more over the last year or so, more so than she had been expecting that was for sure.

But she wasn't upset by it. She was relived that Sawyer didn't hold any malice towards Lucas for their divorce and that they had remained close over the years. It had been hard. She hadn't wanted their marriage to end. She loved him and he loved her but with time, they drifted apart. He becoming lost in his novels and she with her label. And the silence that had formed turned to hurt, anger and he wanted out before the love that was left, turned to hate.

She fought him, begged him to stay but he simply kissed her, said he'd love her forever and walked away.

That was ten years ago and she had learned to live without him or at least learned to pretend too. But watching the two together now, hurt. They were so much alike. Both had a passion for basketball and literature and Sawyer had his eyes. Those piercing blue eyes that seemed to see all. But her hair, it was all Peyton and she knew Lucas loved and hated that Sawyer had those curls and her same legs.

He pouted for days the summer Sawyer shot up in height, between the eighth and ninth grade. Mumbling he needed to lock her in her room until she was thirty. She had only smiled as she watched him from afar, watching their daughter, swearing she'd never tell him she wanted to do the same.

She kept that to herself.

Out of all the men she'd ever known in her life, Lucas Scott was the best of them. It didn't matter that he walked away from them, he would always be her one true love. Her very own knight in shining armor. Granted he begged her for another chance, a year after their divorce, saying he made a mistake and love was enough but she was angry and she pushed him away.

And that has been her only regret in life, not taking that chance he had given to her. It had been her choice then, not his and she told him they were done for good this time and there was no going back.

It wasn't all his fault either. Not really. Not until she'd pushed him too far to ever come back.

He had sworn to her, that day on their old front porch, he fight for her and he did. Until one day, those small gestures stopped and he started a new life without her and met someone new.

Or rather someone old; Lindsey. She came back into his life intent on helping him salvage his non-existent writing career. She had been jealous at first. Watching them together and seeing Lucas smile again. But she hated it. Hated the way Lindsey took up his time but he never once let it stop him from spending time with Sawyer.

He made sure she felt loved, wanted by him and Peyton went on pretending she didn't care that he was moving on. Specially with Lindsey.

He just stopped spending time with her, with them.

And she accepted it, her because she had to. If she wanted to keep him in her life, she needed to accept it.

Because it was the right thing to do, at least that was what Brooke told her. It was best for Sawyer, she said, to see her mother accepting another woman into Lucas's life. So she did. She plastered on a smile, congratulated Lucas and buried her feelings. She had done it before and she do again if it meant he'd be happy she'd accept it.

And she did. Never once letting on that she loved him still.

That she kept to herself. Even after she met someone new, maybe a little old too and let herself believe she really didn't need Lucas Scott in her life.

And yet, after all these years, he was here, in her driveway, her home, playing basketball with their daughter and spending time with them. It didn't matter that it wasn't as a real family, because they weren't really a family, not anymore. At least not the family they should have been. They were something, though. Friends, if nothing else.

"Can you believe this kid of ours?" Lucas asked, as he came to stand beside her, taking the glass of ice tea she held within her hands. His eyes crinkled at the corners as he took a healthy swallow of her drink, mischief dancing in his blue eyes as he handed the now empty glass back to her. "Sorry. I was thirsty."

She shook her head, smiling despite herself. "It's okay. There's more inside. I'll go fix you and Sawyer a glass of it." And refill her own, too.

"Not for me, Mom. I'm going to Paige's house to help her and Aunt Brooke with her new collection, remember?"She vaguely remembered Sawyer mentioning something about that at breakfast that morning.

"You coming back for supper or you eating over there again?" she asked, turning to lift a brow Sawyer's way, already knowing her answer. "I know Brooke will invite you to stay." A sheepish grin, so much like her father's, met her gaze. "Yeah, I'm eating there. They're having Lasagna tonight. You know that's my favorite." Yeah, she did know that. Except when she cooked it, that is.

"Okay, but don't stay over there too late. It might be summer, but I don't want you out after dark."

"I'm almost sixteen, Mom. I'm not a little girl anymore." She whined, a pout forming on her not. But she was still her kid, her baby and she worried about her when she wasn't home. She opened her mouth to tell her so but Lucas beat her to the punch.

"You heard your mother, Sawyer. Home before dark. No arguments."

The teen grumbled, rolled her eyes before jogging the short distance to her parents, a smile of thanks on her lips. With a quick kiss to Peyton's cheek and a gentle wave towards her father, Sawyer made her way down the driveway and out of site.

"Thanks," Peyton said once Sawyer disappeared. "I know you think I'm being too overprotective about some things with her, but…"

"You worry. I get it, Peyt. I worry, too." She nodded, smiling her thanks, and motioned for him to follow her into the house, "Come on, I'll get you that glass of ice tea. I don't want you leaving here dehydrated before heading back to Tree Hill."

He laughed, as she knew that he would. "I highly doubt that I'm dehydrated, Peyton. But I will take a glass since you're offering, but let me get it, okay? You don't have to wait on me."

What if she liked waiting on him?

What if she missed it?

She sighed. "Fine, you fix the drinks while I check on dinner." She turned to head for the stove and froze, looking back at him over her shoulder, an eyebrow arched in question. "You are staying for dinner, aren't you? I know Sawyer left, but I cooked enough for you, too."

"Of course I'm staying. Where else would I eat? It's Saturday. I always eat with you two on Saturdays." That was true, but tonight was different. Sawyer wasn't eating with them like she usually did. And it would be the first time since their divorce that it was just the two of them. Sawyer had always been there to diffuse the tension between them, making their weekly dinners more about her than about the family they might appear to others, or the one they should have been for all those years.

She smiled, weakly, and turned back to the stove, grabbing the oven mitts off the counter, "We're having lasagna," she explained, not bothering to look back at him. Knowing he'd have that look in his eyes. "I didn't have the heart to tell Sawyer that she could eat it here just as well as she could over there."

"Why not?" Lucas asked, his voice sounding much closer than it had moments before. "You went to a lot of trouble to cook dinner, Peyton. Least she could do is stick around long enough to eat some of it." She shrugged a shoulder, taking the pan out of the oven and reaching up to turn off the knobs, avoiding answering him.

"This is done so why don't you get the plates and silverware out and I'll put this on the table," She made the mistake of turning and looking at him, and sucked in a sharp breath as she realized just how close he suddenly was. "Don't look at me like that, Luke, its fine. Really. Sawyer doesn't have to eat here every night."

"That's not the point. You cooked the same meal Brooke did, Peyton. You should have told her that." Peyton sighed, knowing he was right.

"It's just…she likes it over there. It's the closest thing to a real family life she has. I think she even has a small crush on Alexander." She whispered before frowning as Lucas reached out and took the pan from her, placing it on the table and coming back and ushering her into the chair at the head of it. "Wha…what are you doing, Lucas?"

"Something Sawyer should be here to do," he muttered irritably. "Now, sit there like a good little girl and let me do the rest, okay?"

She beamed up at him. Her green eyes sparkling with mirth. "Sure thing, Coach. I'll just sit here and let you wait on me for a change."

"Good." He tossed her a wink before retrieving the remaining pieces of the meal she had prepared for dinner. Then, almost as an afterthought, he got a bottle of wine out of the refrigerator and poured them both a glass. Glancing over his shoulder, his eyes narrowing slightly as he lifted a shoulder at her arched brow. "What? Wine goes better than ice tea does."

With a shake of her head, she tucked a strain of hair behind her ear, watching him as he moved around the kitchen with ease, as if he belonged, gathering the few remaining items needed. Wine did taste better but they didn't usually drink together.

Not just the two them.

In fact, it had been years since they'd spent any real time by themselves, let alone took the time to share a glass of wine with each other. Usually they only drank together when there was a family gathering. It was her way, maybe even his, of numbing the pain of seeing him with someone else.

But this was strange, especially since they weren't together now, but it seemed all too familiar.

As if he had never left and the last ten years didn't exist.

She remembered the little looks he made as he drank, the way his lips opened over the edge of a glass, the way his eyes sparkled when he enjoyed the taste of his drink. It was all so achingly familiar, and yet, there were differences. Real differences. The kind of differences that told her things would never be the same again, no matter how much she wished for it to be so.

"Thank you," she whispered softly, taking the glass of wine he held out to her and offering him a smile. "I haven't experienced this in a while. I forgot what it feels like to be waited on. It's nice."

Lucas smirked, arching a brow her way, "Is that your subtle way of saying you miss having someone at your beck and call, Sawyer?"

"No," she said chuckling, shaking her head at his jest. He use to do that, meet her every need, no matter the cost to him. "I don't miss that. I do but not really. I do, however, miss having someone here other than Brooke around. I miss your mother. She's one of the few things I miss from that part of my life."

Well and him too but she wouldn't tell him that.

She had expected his expression to darken slightly at her words, but what she didn't expect was for him to reach for her hand.

"You could call her more often, you know. She'd love to hear from you and not just when it has to do with Sawyer. She doesn't blame you for our divorce or that you moved to get away from it all. If she blames anyone, it's me." He said with a faint smile.

He was right. It had been years since she had stood in his old childhood home, their first home and said things she wished she could take back. Things that had left his mother hurt and her wanting to get away.

"I don't think she's ready to really hear from me. I said some awful things to you that day." She whispered. Her gaze drifting to her plate.

She had thrown around accusations. Screamed she hated him and wish he had never told her, she was meant for greatness or that he'd love her forever cause if he had, he wouldn't have left.

He wouldn't have moved on.

He wouldn't be like Dan.

And that was the one comment that had thrown Karen for a loop and caused tears to fall from Peyton's eyes. She hadn't meant it and they hung there in the air, filling the gap that had formed between them.

He had simply closed his eyes, whispered softly in defeat, okay, lifted Sawyer into his arms and walked out the door to the waiting car. He let them go and she drove away without once looking back, telling herself she didn't need him.

She didn't need their hometown.

She didn't need any of them.

How wrong she had been.

"It's been years Peyton, and she doesn't hate you. She misses you. Misses seeing you. You were always more to her that just a daughter-in-law, you know that and she was never mad. Never angry. If anything she understood and I pushed you to say those things. I wanted you to stay cause I was selfish and wanted Sawyer in Tree Hill but it never occurred to me, at the time, that if you had stayed it would have haunted you," Lifting a hand, he gently placed it under her chin and turned her gaze back to his. "No one blames you. I don't. My mother doesn't either."

"Haley does."

Grunting, Lucas removing his hand from hers and leaned back in the chair. "She needs to get over it."

"Luke," Peyton drawled out. "She's your best friend. She has every…"

"Doesn't matter, Peyt. She was your friend too and you had every right to say you hated me. To leave Tree Hill. It was your right. Besides, I was the one who walked away first, not you."

"Brooke would have done the same thing." She whispered softly.

"But she didn't." He replied.

No she hadn't. She had simply told Lucas how she felt and kept him in her life at a distance. Warning him, that if he hurt Peyton again, she'd make him pay for it.

He, in turn, called her Peyton's watch dog. Both Brooke and Julian. They had moved away, months after Peyton did. Telling everyone they needed to get away, start over. Haley cried, begged her to stay but Brooke just hugged her close and whispered Peyton needed her more.

They moved into a house less then a block from Peyton's. It was there they had adopted an eight year old boy, Alexander. A year later a little shy six year old girl, Paige.

A family of their own; a life they created away from the constant reminder of what could have been.

And they did it all hours away in Charlotte, away from their past.

Away from Lucas.

And he and Peyton created a routine for Sawyer. He'd drive up early Saturday mornings, take her for the day and stay for dinner. It was hard but it worked and he looked forward to those hours and those dinners, for they were a family. The family he wished they still were.

But he'd never tell her that.

He'd never tell her how her finding Jake again, caused his heart to break. Or that when she had called him up late one night, to tell him they were getting married, how he cried for it was then that he knew he had lost her.

He kept that to himself.

"Have you heard from him?" He asked softly. His gaze drifting to hers and catching a glimpse of pain and he wondered if he was the cause or was it Jake.

"No." She whispered softly, looking away from his intense gaze.

Shifting in his chair, he watched her as she ran her finger over the edge of her glass and sighed, "I still can't believe he left before your divorce was final, Peyton. He's the one who asked for a separation, and he's the one that filed for divorce. Not you"

Only because he knew she wasn't in love with him.

"It doesn't matter now. He's gone and I made it impossible for him to stay. I…He didn't deserve that, Luke. He's a good man. A good husband," Just not the one she wanted. The one she needed. It wasn't his fault that she had, correction, was, in love with another man and had been for years. "Jenny didn't deserve it either nor did Sawyer. Besides, he'll make a great father and husband to someone else, someday."

Just not her.

Lucas blinked, looking away from her, not wanting her to see the shock in his eyes, "Was that why he left?" he asked, taking a long, slow sip of his wine. "Because you didn't want more children?"

There was only one man she wanted children with and it wasn't Jake. Didn't he know that?

"It had nothing to do with that. I would love to have more children, Luke, and Jake knew that. What happened between us was about us, about how much we didn't really fit together. It had nothing to do with either of us not wanting to get pregnant." She said, her gaze lifting to his face and catching his before he looked away once again. "It just…It wouldn't have been right. For us to have a child, I mean. We were having problems, had been for awhile and…it just wasn't getting any better for us. And I…we just didn't know how to make it better."

Lucas shook his head, glancing down at the untouched food on the table before them.

"She was jealous of you, you know." He looked up at her then, a thin sheen of tears in his eyes. "Lindsey was. Of you and Sawyer, of the bond you have and the bond we share over her. She never understood it."

Peyton placed a hand over his, her thumb gently rubbing across his knuckles as she pressed a hand against his cheek and tenderly brushed away the lone tear that slide down his cheek.

"It got worse after her miscarriage, too. She actually forbid me from seeing my own daughter, from seeing you. Can you believe that? Like I'd cut you both out of my life just because she told me too."

She knew. Lindsey had called her on the phone, crying, hysterical because Lucas had walked out on her and she feared he was leaving her for good. She'd blamed Peyton for that, telling her that she had destroyed her marriage, for never letting go of a man she had tossed aside. Peyton couldn't blame Lindsey for how she felt. She knew she deserved it; the blame. She did after all throw him away, denying him, them another chance when she had sent him away that day.

But things had been hard back then, confusing and painful and just all to consuming. Everything had been too much, especially when it came to her relationship with Lucas.

It had always been too much; Too big and she no longer could define herself without him. And that had scared her.

So she ran. Hid away, believing it was what was best for everyone.

She regretted everything now, of course. But it was too late to change it all. Too late to go back and fix the lies she told herself were truths.

"You know what, Luke?" Pushing her chair back, she tossed her napkin on the table, her gazing drifting from his to her untouched plate. "Suddenly, I'm not very hungry anymore."

She refused to meet his eyes as she got up from her seat and went back outside, to watch the sun as it began its slow descent over the trees and the few houses that lined the small creek bed that ran behind the house.

When she had first seen the house, she had fallen in love with the creek and the way it seemed so serene, peaceful. It made the chaotic world around her seem more settled. She still loved the creek but the serenity of it suddenly was replaced with the sad recognition of confusion and noise and a stilted movement that went against the very job nature had intended.

It was to flow, to create progress and continue along a path, finding its way before making its way to something larger, something better. That was what natured had intended; a steady flow of movement not the chaos that seemed to overtake it now.

The same stillness that seemed to have taken over her life.

"You'd think it would always be peaceful here, wouldn't you?" She whispered softly upon hearing the sliding door open and shut and his faint footsteps on the patio."Are you saying it's not anymore?" he asked softly, coming to stand beside her.

She shook her head, wrapping her arms around her midriff. "It's noisy sometimes, the quiet. A lot of things can get through when it's like this. Things that shouldn't be getting through at all anymore."

"You can talk to me. You know that, don't you?" She did. Just as she knew, he knew she wouldn't take him up on it. She wouldn't tell him the truth, at least not all of it.

"Thanks, but I'm okay. Just lonely, I guess. Now that Sawyer's getting older, she isn't really home much anymore. Doesn't need me as much," She shrugged slightly. "I guess it's just the way things are now."

She felt him shift beside her and then his hands were gripping her arms, turning her towards him. His eyes on her, waiting until she lifted her own to met his, "It doesn't have to be that way. It's been over a year since your divorce and you say your lonely so change it. Get back into your art. Try dating again. Met someone new but change it Peyton. You have the power too, so do it. I told you once you were meant for…"

Shaking her head, she closed her eyes and softly whispered, "Don't say it."

"Why not? It's true."

Her eyes fluttered open, a thin mist of wetness blurred her vision as she met his gaze. Her voice low, barely a whisper. "Why haven't you moved on? Dated, I mean. Nathan said you don't, that you haven't since your divorce from Lindsey."His shoulder lifted in a shrug, his hands slowly slide down her arms until they gripped her wrist, his eyes locked on hers, "The divorce is still new."

"Liar," She said. Her eyes narrowing slightly. He had divorced Lindsey a whole two years before she and Jake had ended. "He said your lonely. That you spend most of your time with him, Haley and the kids and it's only on Friday nights that you smile, really smile. That you don't seem so lonely."

He looked away, his expression dark and troubled, and then his eyes were back on her face, his gaze intent and filled with something she had seen once long ago. "I think you know the answer to that, Peyton. I think you've always known it, just as I have."

She opened her mouth; no sound came out. Unable to look in his eyes, she broke their gaze and looked to the fading sun, her voice low, "I don't know what your talking about."

The corners of his mouth lifted as he closed his eyes, and slowly opened them again. "I think you do, Blondie."

She did but she was suddenly afraid of what he meant. Of letting herself believe he wanted her still.

He lifted an arm, placing a finger under her chin and returning her gaze to his as he took a step closer to her. A small smile on his lips, "I haven't dated because the woman that I want, have always wanted, is standing right in front of me."

Suddenly breathing didn't seem so easy, "W…what?"

"You heard me, Blondie. Don't start playing dumb now. It doesn't become you."

"Luke…"

"Tell me I'm wrong, Peyton. Tell me you don't want this as much as I do. That you don't love me like I still love you."

But she did. She just hadn't expected him to want it too. "I…this is crazy, Luke. What are you doing? What are we doing?"

"Nothing yet," he smirked. "But if you give me a minute, I'm pretty sure I'll be kissing you."

Kissing her? She took a step back, his hands falling away from her wrist.

"Will I be kissing you back?" she asked breathlessly, backing further away, toward the house, freezing when she was met with the cool, hard siding next to the patio doors.

Lucas followed suit, both hands coming to rest on the wall behind her head. Blocking her escape. "You tell me," he answered seriously, his voice dropping as his eyes darkened, his gaze filling with desire and searching hers for the permission he sought.

She shivered, awestruck by the head that slowly descended toward hers, the soft, familiar lips that brushed along the corners of her mouth, teasingly caressing each end before finally moving to the center, pressing firmly and confidently.

It was familiar. Comfortable and she felt him everywhere as his lips moved over hers. Reminding her of a different time. A different place when he stood before her, confessing his feelings for her. And she felt herself coming to life just as she had that day, in that gym with confetti falling down around them.

He had been all she wanted then and he was all she wanted now. This was what she wanted. This was what she had been missing; The rightness, the knowledge that the man before her knew her, knew her better than she knew herself.

And it was real. This was him, and her. It was them. It had always been them and it would always be them.

So many wasted years of mistakes, wrong turns, and hidden truths and it all led her back to him. To a kiss; An embrace and a silent promise that this was forever.

They were forever.

"Will you stay?" she asked him softly when they broke apart, watching as his eyes watched her lips move with each word she spoke. "Will you stay with me?"

He smiled, a gentle, genuine smile and lifted a finger to her kiss swollen lips. "Wouldn't want to be any place else, Princess."

Princess? He never called her that. Arching a brow, she titled back in his arms, a hand lifting to his cheek, "Princess?"

She laughed as he squinted, shook his head and sheepishly smiled. "Trying something new." He whispered.

"Doesn't work for you." She said softly as she ran a finger over his lower lip, amazed that only hours before she had been dreaming of this and now she was standing in his arms.

"This is it, Peyton. Last time to get it right." The humor, that only moments before had been in his eyes, faded behind a mask of seriousness.

"I know."

His hands shifted on her waist, pulling her tighter to him as he leveled his gaze with hers. "Are sure you want this? Us cause it's all I want. All I've ever wanted and if…"

Pressing a finger to his lips, silencing him, "I want this. I want," Smiling, she rested her hand against his heart, feeling it's beat and softly whispered, "I want everything with you."

Lifting his hands, Lucas framed her face with his palms. A smile lighting up his face at her words. Words from the past. "I love you. I'll always love you."

"I love you too, Luke. I never stopped."

He gave her a wry smile, leaned in and touched his forehead to hers. "We both made mistakes, Peyton. Took some wrong turns along the way but we've always been us, haven't we?"

Her eyes fluttered shut as she nodded her head. It was true. They had always been an us never him and her, just them.

"Kiss me again." She whispered, her eyes opening again.

And he did. He kissed her like it was their first time; Soft and sweet and innocence.

And those butterflies she felt back then, standing there in that room, in that house, with only the moonlight, they had her shaking and clinging to him all over again because suddenly forever seemed so clear. And that noise, that stillness in her head? It faded when his tongue slipped past her lips.

He was real. This was real. He was home in every sense of the word.

He was second chances and everything that mattered. Peyton broke the kiss, her forehead coming rest against his as she stared into his eyes, a small smile on her lips, "This is real."

With a chuckle, Lucas pressed his lips against hers before pulling her tightly against him. Her arms wrapping his waist and whispered softly in her ear, "This is real."

"Say it again."

"This is real."

"Good." She whispered softly as she buried her face in his neck.

"Your stealing lines from the past." He whispered with a faint laugh. His lips brushing against her ear.

She was but they were moments she remembered most. Moments that led them here and she'd do it all again. All the heartache if it meant she'd be standing here, in this moment, with him cause he was everything.

Peyton leaned back in his arms, a small smile on her lips as her fingers trailed down his neck to the collar of his shirt, "I'm not the famous author."

Laughing, he stilled her hand in his and brought it to his lips. His eyes bright and full of love, "That your not." He whispered, jokingly. Her eyes going wide before she smacked him against the chest.

"Luke!"

"Ow, you've gotten abusive Blondie." His voice low as he tugged her back to him. His arms wrapping around her waist, holding her to him.

"You've gotten mean." She whispered, her hand clinging to the front of his shirt, listening to the rhythmic beat of his heart beneath his chest.

"Take me inside, Luis. I wanna be with you."

"Are you sure?" he questioned quietly, his fingers picking up a strand of her hair. "There's no rush, you know. I'm not going anywhere. Not this time."

Neither was she. But she wanted to be with him. It had been so long and she didn't want to waste another moment of their lives on things that didn't matter. This, them, that mattered. Everything else, all the talking they'd have to do. All the words that needed to be said… it could wait.

It could all wait. Reconnecting, loving each other, showing each other how much they loved each other, that was important, that was necessary. That was everything.

That was all that mattered.

"I'm sure, Lucas. I want you. I've always wanted you. Just you." He gave a small nod, bending and lifting her bridal style, her eyes going wide in surprise.

"Luke!"

"What?" He said, a small smile on his lips as he carried her through the open patio doors. "I'm doing what the lady asked of me, taking her inside."

Laughing, Peyton wrapped her arms his neck and buried her face it's curve.

"You know," He whispered softly, lowering her to ground, his arms slipping around her waist, holding her close. "Sawyer's going to be ecstatic."

She knew?

Pulling away slightly, Peyton arched a brow his way. "She knew? How? Did you…"

"She's smart." He said with a shrug. "I guess she just figured out what we've been trying to pretend wasn't there."

Somehow she didn't think that was all there was to it. With a shake of her head, she slipped her arms around his neck once again, "Whatever you say." She whispered softly as Lucas slowly walked them down the hall and into her bedroom, depositing her on the bed, she'd figured it out later. Much, much later.

Right now all she wanted was to rediscover the man that was laying beside her, in her arms for he was everything and she was his everything. She saw it in his eyes, felt it in his kiss. She felt it in his tiny little breaths against her lips, just before his lips touched hers.

This was forever and looking in his eyes now, that stillness she felt, the confusion and the noise suddenly didn't seem so overwhelming.

Pressing a hand to his face, she gently caressed the apple of cheek, her eyes misting over as she softly whispered words she never thought she say again, "Welcome home, Luke."

~fin