Dr. Strangelust filled up a syringe with some 'fantasy formula' and pondered his decision on who his first victim should be.
Doctor: "I think I'll decide by playing a little game of 'Three Blind Mice'. Whomever one of you is the first one to blink when I strike my most sexiest pose will be…"
RING, RING, RING!
Doctor: "Dammit! Who could be calling me at this most inopportune time?"
Dr. Strangelust stepped out of the room to answer his phone.
Doctor: "If you're one of those telemarketers, I've told you a thousand times I'm on your 'Do-Not-Call' list…"
Peter: "Hey Doc, we appear to have a little…no, big problem here with Jerry. You see, I introduced him to his first shooter, and he went from his first to his tenth in 6.8 seconds, if you get my drift. Tonight also happens to be 80's Karaoke Night and he got the urge to dance on the ceiling when someone started butchering Lionel Richie. So, I think we're in a bit of a pickle here."
Doctor: "What are you talking about? You can't be the designated driver?"
Peter: "Well, you see, my license has been revoked indefinitely after the time I took up a quarter-hour segment on Spike TV's Disorderly Conduct. Lucky thing I took advantage of my 'special' person diagnosis and got off on probation, huh?"
Doctor: "Surely you've got enough money for a cab?"
Peter: "See, that's the other thing. You do realize that I'm now a gigantic rat? Well, my type is rejected by this conservative red state for being different. So I had to empty my entire wallet and max out my credit cards to keep the bar patrons from exterminating me. So, me and Jerry are going to need you to give us a ride back to your animal shelter, please."
Doctor: "Blast it! Well, it's not like you girls are going anywhere, so I'll have to put my fantasy on hold. Just sit tight and enjoy your last few human moments!"
(Dr. Strangelust slams down the phone and exits the room)
Alex: "Boy, that was close, too close! You would think that our lives were scripted or something?"
Sam: "Well there's not much time before he comes back, we have to act fast. Do we have something handy?"
Clover: "Aha! (reaching into back pocket) So that's where I placed that laser nail file! I'll have all of us out of here in a jiff!"
The spies would be freed from the gurneys in just a matter of minutes before Dr. Strangelust returned to the lab with Peter and a drunken Jerry. The boss was set down to sober up in a spare room while the other two were set to resume the doctor's mission downstairs. The spies would pull off an illusion trick with an X-Powder by creating holograms of the three of them still strapped down and captivated for the doctor's twisted purposes.
This time, with nobody around to disrupt him, Dr. Strangelust would choose Clover as his first victim, except things didn't turn out the way he expected.
Doctor: "What's this? Nothing's happening! The needle is going right through!"
Peter: "Oh my God, Doctor, you killed them! You strapped them in too tight and cut off their circulation! Now there's nothing but their ghosts left!"
Doctor: "No, no! That was not my intent! I meant no harm!"
Peter: "I hate you!" (runs upstairs bawling)
Peter's dash out of the pet shop would be interrupted by a piece of Swiss cheese; his search for the source would unearth three people he would least expect.
Peter: "AAAHHH! Zombies! Please don't eat my brains! They have no nutritional value! I never made it past the third grade!"
Sam: "Peter, relax, we're not dead! We created some illusions of us down in the basement."
Alex: "Our X-Powders can do lots of cool stuff, haven't you noticed?"
Peter: "Yes, you girls are starting to creep me out with all your gadgets; well, this isn't the first time I've been through a traumatizing experience."
Cutaway
Peter and Cleveland are hogtied by an overzealous member of the Parents' Television Council who's giving them a lecture on the show's lack of morality.
PTC guy: "Don't you two realize your show has a devastating effect on the psyches on the children of our great country? Our soldiers are not fighting for our freedom in the Middle East just so you can spew your trash every Sunday night!"
Peter: "Oh come on! You are criticizing our sex and violence while those soldiers who you unconditionally worship and commit much worse of those same acts get a free pass?"
PTC guy: "You son of a BITCH! Just for that remark I'm subjecting you and your friend to torture much worse than the most uncooperative of prisoners! Now you'll know how the rest of the country feels!"
(PTC guy inserts videotape containing nothing but a looped scene of Chris lifting up Meg's shirt revealing an unflattering figure and Brian throwing up on command)
PTC guy: "By the way, this is recorded on EP format! Enjoy your next six hours!"
(six hours later)
Peter walks out of the torture chamber spooked and wide-eyed while Cleveland has a big grin and a noticeable bulge in his trousers.
Peter: "Oh! What are you so happy about? I've gone through enough trauma to last a lifetime and you look like a kid in a candy store!"
Cleveland: "Look Peter, don't take this personally, please realize I'm still getting over my divorce and I'm still a lonely man, but after getting accustomed to seeing your daughter without her shirt on for six hours straight, I've come to the conclusion that Meg is now my favourite of your three children."
One hour later, Peter removed the black hood from Cleveland's head and his former best friend was shocked to be on top of Mount Quahog while chained to a shopping cart. One final push would seal his fate.
Cleveland: "What the hell? No, no, no, no, no, NOOOO…!"
End Cleveland
Peter: "Well you girls have just given me an idea! This should be the perfect solution to stopping this doctor once and for all if you'll just let me borrow one of your little do-hickeys you've got there."
Peter swipes Alex's X-Powder and mistakenly faces the gadget towards the girls, transforming their spysuits into bubble-wrap bikinis.
Peter: "Oops. Tee, hee."
Peter faces the X-Powder the other way and transforms into the vermin version of Miss America.
Peter: "I tried something like this before but like that old saying goes, 'second time is a charm'. Whoa! There's something about your swimwear that's quite tempting…"
Clover: "One pop of my bikini and I'm going to snap and crackle every bone in your body, you hear me?"
Peter got the message and went off his mission to set the trap.
