I looked at the numbers on the clock: 6:30.ugh, great not even time to get up and I have too I cant fall back asleep. I might as well start the day it would go off in 15 minutes anyway. I grabbed my toiletries bag and headed to the bathroom. I quietly locked the door behind me and turned the water on full blast. The heat made the mirrors fog-up. When I jumped in I felt both relieved and also tense. I felt the boiling hot water falling down on my sore back it stung and also felt amazing. I could feel all of the knots and kinks coming out of my back. My throat was sore from last night, and my head was throbbing from the lack of oxygen. I quickly got out and got dressed; when I came out I went outside in the bone chilling rain getting into my truck my bag was already here because I had all of my work done before I came home.
I'm not even surprised anymore I thought as I pulled up to my spot to see mike waiting for me with a big smile on his face. He looked up having heard my trucks monster engine. The day went through like usuall; mike walked me to my classes and tried kissing me. I gave him my cheek each time. I was really getting tired of the whole nothing is wrong act. Today I was planning to got to the library and maybe look up some other local schools. I had saved up little by little for emergencies and now with about 2 years worth of pay I had enough to catch a pretty heavy train ride. The thought of being away from forks made me fell a surge of hope but was once again brought back down by the thought of what would happen if Charlie or mike found me. Not to mention I was probably the biggest chicken shi-um ya biggest chicken in the world and would never actually got through with it. I would stay around here like a waist of breath and space as Charlie so fondly like to remind me I was, and it's not even that I really care what they think about me anyway. Its just that it really does hit home you know? I'm always crashing into things and being told at home stupid I am. Its not that I have self-pity. Don't get me wrong I know that people have it worse than me and I know that no matter what happens I WILL get out as soon as graduation is over they will no longer hear of me. But that's not the point the point is I'm sick and tired of hearing it form people as pathetic as them. They try to make me feel small but they wont. Because if not for the fact of their physical strength I would have left long ago. The last bell of the day rang and I didn't even dress out I just raced to my car today I got another beloved paycheck form my horrible job of sitting in Newton's outfitters while mike tried with all his might to grope me .It was disgusting and what was worse not even the fact that he knew without a doubt (probably) that I hated his guts and would most likely joyfully kill him if the opportunity had but presented itself but that he was doing all of this in front of his…wait a minute for the anticipation to settle….MOTHER! Ugh…I just wanted to tell him exactly what he could do with those hands of his. After what felt like forever I looked over to the clock and saw my shift had ended about 20 minutes ago. Great I endured 20 extra minutes in hell for what, to go back to hell again which I should be calling home. But now I almost had my degree and enough money to start off and give myself a new life.
When I got home it was raining, I ignored the throbbing that was waving through my whole body. I saw there were no cars and proceeded with unlocking the door and
heading upstairs locking the bathroom door and running a hot shower. While I lay down in bed I thought about prices of things.gas, clothes, food, housing, collages. That was the only one I needed to worry about really. I could make everything else work out if I didn't have to pay for collage and I don't think I have to I mean I have pretty much straight A's. I admit I'm not the biggest fan of the rain but tonight it helped me a lot. It made my body relax and it eased some of the painful silence that I usually experienced.
-The Next Day-
BEEP.BEEP.
BEEP.
UGH. That infuriating alarm! Oooo, I could just kill whoever invented it. But alas I must get up for I will be late if I do not. Not good my personal purgatory has brought me back into reality. As I was driving down forks highway I almost missed my turn for the school; some stupid shiny Volvo almost ran over my truck. I know, I know but still, it did you get the point. When I pulled up my regular spot was now occupied by, oh none other than the stupid shiny Volvo. Great. I opted for the next one down the row. Mike was standing outside the under the overhang outside the school waiting for me to come. As soon as he saw me he ran to my side. He had the look of death in his eyes.
' Button your shirt please.' His voiced laced with venom. The thing with mike was you could always tell if he was mad at you or someone else and he was defiantly mad. No doubt about it but not at me. That was a good sign and a bad sign good thing is he wasn't mad at me. I mumbled 'fine' and buttoned my button once more. Usually he was the one telling me to unbutton it more…so he could show me off. As he so sickly put it. We walked into English together and everyone was talking animatedly with each other in groups. Girls with girl's boys with boys. At first I thought it was some kind of class thing but as I listened to what they were saying it was most defiantly not about the school. The girl's were happy and the boys…well not so much. They seemed uplifted little every now and then but mostly looked from a range of sullen and livid.
'Oh god…did you see them…they were soo hot…is my hair okay?'
All day that's all you could hear. Mike growled when Tyler asked me if I was free this Saturday…again. He had made it his tradition ever since he admitted he liked me, even though I had a boyfriend and he had a girl that was interested in him and happened to be Lauren. Mike and him haven't exactly been on friendly terms after lets just say that. Believe me given the chance I d kill to go out with Tyler instead of mike, not because I like him but simply for the fact of making my life easier. Today kind of went by in a haze, at lunch since mike wasn't out yet I took my book out and started reading pride and prejudice again. I didn't have any lunch and hadn't eaten in almost 2 weeks now I got a bottle of water and cherished the cool liquid that slide with ease down my throat. I had a feeling that something bad was going to happen but I tried to read my book and not pay too much attention to it. I felt that weird feeling that someone is watching you after a little before mike had come and finally sat down for then I had tried to read but couldn't pay attention the two emotions were mixing together creating the most fearful feeling in my life. I really didn't want to look up for fear of what I might see when I did. Instead I just randomly flipped through pages of the book making it look like I was actually reading.
Well I hope you guys like the chapter… I think it's a little longer than usual. Have no fear Bella's change luvers I have not forgotten about y9ou guys I'm typing as fast as my fingers will allow! Pm me wit any q's comments, suggestions or requests. I love you my little ones. 3 :
