AN: Thanks again for the reviews. Keep them up, they really spur me on

Brendan was stressed. The bastard suppliers gas screwed up the drinks orders but were refusing to accept responsibility, the DJ for the night had called up and cancelled (with a mild case of the sniffles as far as Brendan could tell) and some boozy hen night had left a nasty mess in the bathroom that could turn even the strongest of stomachs. And he'd agreed to meet the boys for lunch.

Declan had agreed to take Padraig to the park and promised to look after him while he checked on the club, and even that was worrying Brendan a bit. Eileen had mentioned that they'd been fighting more than usual since…. since the incident. Those weren't Eileen's words of course. Hers' were closer to 'that time you properly fucked up.'

After spending a long time shouting at various people, he got off the phone and poured himself a drink, and found himself thinking about how different everything had seemed last time. Like it was all shiny and exciting and beautiful. Life had been like that then. He'd shared his bed with beautiful Steven (or Steven's bed with Steven, he didn't really mind the where), he'd been building the strength of his family, the ones he cared about anyway, getting there with Cheryl. Well maybe not so much the latter, but he still loved them all and felt loved in return.

He sipped at the whiskey, hoping he could swallow his misery with the burning liquid that trickled down his throat. Then he poured more than half away; he couldn't let the boys see him drunk.

He shouted at a couple of the bar staff that he would be back before they knew it and that if he caught them slacking, there would be hell to pay. Scowling at them, he remembered how Steven had been at work – so hard working, except when that pain Rae was around distracting him. Then he could be a cheeky little bastard. Brendan smiled at the memories, thinking of the times that followed, the cheek, the fun, the beautiful Steven Hay.

No, that was bad. That just reminded Brendan how much he missed the boy. As he stormed out of his club, he slammed the door harder than he probably should have.

A text from Padraig told him they were in the park with fish and chips and to meet them there. He changed direction and trudged along, not taking long to reach the gate to the park from where he could see Paddy on a rug.

He should have known Padraig was up to something last night when he was being so friendly and well behaved. Then he realised Declan must have been in on it too, because he didn't think Paddy could have got Steven there by himself. Because Steven was, looking shocked to see either of them.

Padraig was looking both smug and nervous. What was he playing at now?

"Er…" said Steven, uselessly but charmingly.

"Padraig, what do you think you're playing at?" he demanded, trying to make his voice firm but not aggressive as a Dad's voice should be.

"Right… so…" Paddy started, and then cleared his throat. "So, I made a really, really," he breathed out, "really big mistake. I don't really expect you to forgive me for it or anything…"

"Padraig, you don't need to do this…" Steven's voice was so quiet, and Brendan found himself picturing what Padraig had found that day so long ago, and felt sick at it.

"Yes I do, Ste" Paddy insisted. I need to and I want to. Please just… just listen."

Brendan glanced at Steven who was biting his lip and determinedly not looking at anyone.

Paddy took a really deep breath. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I did to you Ste, and for what happened because of it. I don't know if I can ever make it up to you, but I am sorry."

Steven continued to stare at the floor, but mumbled "I told ya I forgave ya. He was playing with ya, controlling ya."

"I still did it, Ste! I told Cheryl those things, knowing it was wrong!"

"We all know you feel bad about it Padraig…" Brenda started, but Paddy interrupted him.

"But that's not the end, is it?" he cried, earnestly, though Brendan didn't know what he meant. "Why did you two split up?" Padraig asked.

Brendan caught Steven's minimal glance his way.

"It's complicated," the younger man said.

"No, it isn't! Dad told Declan. It's because of me, because even after everything I've done, you two don't want to hurt me."

Steven's next look at Brendan was reproachful. Brendan had to make up for that.

"Padraig, it's not your place to interfere here."

"Yes it is!" the boy insisted, "If you two are making yourselves even more unhappy because of me!"

"Ye can't force Steven to forgive us, Padraig!" Brendan said, aware he was losing control of his voice.

"I do forgive ye, though," Steven's quiet voice interrupted him.

Padraig stopped arguing as Brendan stared at Steven.

"I mean…" Steven tried awkwardly, "Who wouldn't believe their kid, right? People didn't believe me about Terry or… or you know. How could you not believe him? I'm not saying it didn't hurt me, but… I do understand."

Brendan stared at the man he loved with renewed awe.

"I don't deserve you," he said honestly.

Steven smiled, "probably not, but there's nowt new there, is there?" He looked at his feet again. "But… you proper freaked out our Leah and Lucas, you know. I can't let that happen again."

The mild hope that had grown in Brendan as Steven spoke shrivelled again. Padraig, too, seemed to shrink in front of them.

"If…" Steven began again slowly, "if we do this, you will have to see someone. You know, about the anger and everything."

Brendan drank in the sight of him, barely believing his ears.

"Anything," he heard himself say.

"And we would take it slow, right? No sudden… stuff, or owt?"

"Like what?"

"I don't know, just take it slow."

"I love you Steven." He couldn't help himself saying it. It fell out of his mouth like it was escaping.

Steven smiled, "OK, so slow's gonna be tricky."

Brendan laughed at that, but Steven was looking at Paddy again.

"Are you sure, Paddy? You're not gonna do anything else to stop it? 'Cause you only need to say, right?"

Padraig nodded, "I want my Dad to be happy. You make him happy. And I think you're quite a nice bloke, really."

Steven grinned.

"So…" prompted a voice behind them, and they turned to see Declan holding hands with Lucas and Leah, who was grasping a Barbie doll in her hand and giggling mischievously.

"Leah Barnes, did you lie about your Barbie?" Steven exclaimed,

Leah nodded, and moved behind the legs of a smiling Declan.

"Ah, it was all in a good cause, wasn't it Leah?" the owner of the legs said.

The little girl nodded again.

"That was naughty, Leah," Steven scolded, "You shouldn't lie."

"And you, what, you're encouraging her?" Brendan scolded Declan, who looked a little sheepish.

"Well, Ste wouldn't agree to meet us without it, and it wouldn't be fair if we get to sort you out and Ste's kids never got a look in," Declan argued.

"You broke up because of your kids, right? Well, we are all here saying we are not an obstacle," Paddy reasoned, "the only thing standing in your way is you!"

And Steven finally looked at Brendan. Properly, full in the face, and Brendan did the same. He knew he'd never stopped loving Steven, and probably never would. Could he expect Steven to feel the same though? After everything that happened.

"So?" he asked softly.

Steven seemed to think a little longer. "We'll take it slow?" he asked again, looking like he was on the edge of a precipice, almost ready to jump.

Brendan nodded.

"Daddy! I'm hungry!" whined a small voice by Steven's legs. Lucas was pulling on his father's trousers.

"Declan said we were having a picnic," grinned Leah.

"It's here," Paddy said, pointing at a few bags beside him. "They wouldn't let me buy champagne though, even when I explained."

Steven glared at him. "What did I say about slow, Paddy?"

Brendan wasn't sure he'd had an answer, but people started to sit on the picnic rug around him. After a few seconds of staring, he felt a hand take his, as Steven pulled him down to join them.

AN: Probably just one more chapter. If you want it. x