Trip to the zoo

Okay, this is a special request for "Selena", Thanks for reading, and sorry I haven't updated in a while, but Exams are coming up and well, I was supposed to be revising at Christmas, but I ended up starting this fanfic, lol. Sp when it's time to revise I'll probably be updating more, and revising at the same time of course. Because Exams are important, NEVER FORGET THAT! Okay, hyper outburst. Anyways, onto the chapter.

Jacob's POV

Uhhhhh, babysitting again, Yay! (Note the sarcasm). Since the kids messed up mother's day I was to take them out, far, far away from civilisation.

Flashback

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" I shouted whilst seven little faces stared up at me.

"Makin Breakie for mommy!" shouted Alice excitedly. Right, throwing food around the kitchen is really making breakfast, really thoughtful guys.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!" Shouted Esme coming down the stairs in her dressing gown. Oh hell, she's mad. Alice giggled nervously; I grabbed the kids and ran out the door whilst Esme screamed after us.

"Whoops," said Nessie, we all laughed, whoops was an understatement.

" Are we there yet?" asked Emmett. I sighed,

"NO!" I said, come on kid, we've been driving for 2 minutes. I was driving the mini bus, yes, I said mini Bus, A FLAMING PINK MINI BUS! Alice and Bella decided to paint it, it used to be sliver, AT LEAST SLIVER WAS A MANLY COLOUR, BUT NO, PINK, I HAVE TO DRIVE A PINK MINI BUS! A couple of girls laughed as I drove past, I opened the window.

"YOU CAN LAUGH, HAVE YOU LOOKED IN MIRROR LATELY!" I shouted, feeling pleased, until their boyfriends looked over at me, I sped up, they were HUGE!

"STOP THE BUS I NEED A WEE-WEE, STOP THE BUS I NEED A WEE-WEE, STOP THE BUS I NEED A WEE-WEE, A WEE-WEE CUP OF TEA!" Shouted Emmett, Jasper, Edward and Bella.

"And a biscuit!" shouted Alice. Where the hell did they learn that song?!

Finally we arrived at the zoo; Emmett grabbed Nessie and ran on.

"Emmett!" I shouted after him, picking up Bella and setting Edward on my shoulders. Emmett came back and we went to pay.

"Hey, seven kids and one adult?" I said, the man behind the glass gave us the tickets and I paid, the poor guy looked scared.

"Yeah, you should be scared, they've got me in jail before," I said, remembering.

Flashback

"Guys, okay, very funny, seriously though, I didn't abuse her, she fell," I explained as two policemen tried to take me away while Alice was crying and Rose was comforting her. Emmett stuck his tongue out at me.

"Guys, she fell, come on, I'm not allowed to go to jail!" I said, struggling.

"Like we haven't heard that one before," the policeman said, laughing and putting me into the car.

"Seriously, I'm too young!" I said, as they got into the car and drove off.

"Sure you are," said the driver, they both laughed.

"I AM, I'M ONLY 16!" I shouted.

"Okay, okay, calm down, we're not taking you to jail," he said. I relaxed.

"Well then, where are you taking me?" I asked, as we drove into the police station.

"Here," he said, dragging me out of the car. I struggled, I can't go to jail! I WANNA GO TO COLLEGE!

They put me into a cell with several other people, they stood up as I was trying to bend the bars, no luck, but it was worth a try.

"Oh, Hello," I said, shaking as I turned round and saw five fully grown man towering over me.

"I was just leaving," I said as I turned round and shouted at the guards to let me out.

"No sir," they said, laughing.

I had a black eye for three weeks after that.

"Are they your kids?" He asked, pointing towards the seven little monsters, trying to catch the fish in the pond. Emmett actually caught one and ate it whole.

"Hell no," I said, "I'm their babysitter, I feel sorry for the parents though. I had to take them here, mother's day didn't go too well," I whispered. He nodded and I went to help Emmett choke up the fish.

We were at the dolphins now, there was a show on and we were all sitting, waiting.

"Look!" Shouted Alice, pointing to the Dolphins in the pool.

"Yes Alice, it's a dolphin show, there's going to be dolphins," I said, she giggled, rolling her eyes. Seriously, it was like talking to a five year old, wait, she is five. Whoops.

Half way through the show Alice patted my arm.

"Look, look!" she shouted, pointing again to the pool.

"What Alice?!" I asked. She pointed to the pool again, I looked. There was a shark, and guess who was on the shark.

"EMMETT!" I shouted, he looked up and waved, still riding on the Shark. So that's why everyone was screaming. I ran towards the pool, setting Nessie down.

"ROSE, LOOK AFTER THEM!" I all but screamed at her, she obliged. The zoo keepers were trying to catch Emmett in a net, but Emmett wasn't having it.

"EMMETT! GET OUT RIGHT NOW!" I shouted, Emmett looked scared for a moment, and then he jumped. I ripped my shirt off and jumped into the water after him. I heard several screams, but ignored them.

I resurfaced dragging Emmett with me, I jumped out of the water and lay Emmett down as he spluttered and choked. Rose was there, with the other Cullens along with the rest of the people who were in the stands. Emmett sat up and laughed. What the hell was wrong with the kid?!

"Jake, it was a toy!" he said, pointing to the man with the Shark fin on his helmet. I WAS GOING TO KILL THE BOY! I RISKED MY LIFE FOR HIM AND IT WAS ALL A PRANK! I ran into the pool and starting to punch the guy. Someone called the police eventfully and an ambulance. The poor guy was whisked away while the police dealt with me.

"It was all a misunderstanding," I tried to explain.

"Do you have a criminal record?" one of them asked.

"Um... no," I said, but Emmett came up and said,

"Yeah, he does, he's been in jail three times!" he said happily. Shut up kid, I glared at him.

"Really?" Asked the policeman, with one eyebrow raised.

"No, the kid's just messing, Right Emmet?!" I said glaring at him and ruffling his hair playfully. Come on kid; don't do this to me, not now.

He pushed me away,

"Yes really, he stole, abused my sister and murdered someone," Emmett said cheerfully. Hey!

"WAIT JUST ONE HELL OF A SECOND, I DID NOT KILL ANYONE!" I shouted. The policemen stepped back a little. Then one of the whispered to Emmett,

"Is he a bit mental?"

"NO!" I shouted, wanting to hit them. But I didn't, it would only get me into more trouble.

"Right, how about this, we let you go, with a warning okay? And this'll never happen again, right?" I nodded. Sure, it won't happen again.

"Okay now, off you go," they said, slowing backing away from me. O.k.a.y. Weird. I picked up Nessie, Edward climbed onto my back, Rose took Alice's hand and Jasper took Alice's other hand, Emmett took Rose's other hand and I picked up Bella in my free arm. We walked off, heading toward the Monkeys.

When we reached the Monkeys there was no-one there, I wonder why? We went over to the glass and there were two monkeys in the trees, two baby monkeys chasing each other and two monkeys doing something they shouldn't do in public. I quickly covered the children's eyes, as did rose. Rose was laughing her head off.

"Come on guys let's go," I said, trying to drag them away.

"But we only got here," said Alice, who managed to struggle free.

"Jake, what are the monkey's doing?" Asked Bella. Rose laughed even harder.

"Nothing, now let's go!" I said, and they reluctantly followed.

"Lookie, Lions!" Said Bella and jumped down, Edward followed after her. I sat Nessie down on the wall so she could see.

"Hey Rose, take care of them would you, I need to go to the restrooms," I said, Rose made a face, but agreed.

After I got back Rose, along with the other Cullens, were screaming. I ran over to them.

"What's wrong?!" I asked, half wanting to hear it, half not. Rose screamed again and point at the lions. Nessie was patting one of the lion's heads sating "Kitty!" over and over again.

"HOW THE HELL DID SHE GET IN THERE?!" I shouted, trying to climb the fence to get her. The zoo keeper grabbed me back.

"Yo kid, you can't do that," he said. I just pointed to Nessie and he jumped over the fence like he was a teenager, he looked around 68 or so though. He approached the lion slowly, Rose was still screaming. I miss I were the one to jump over the fence, you know, be the hero, instead of the bad guy. Nessie lay down next to the Lion, the lion wasn't going to harm her, and the lioness seemed very protective over her, oh hell no! Please tell me the lioness does not think Nessie is one of her cubs?! She can't!

The zoo keeper took another step, the lioness growled. Not a good sign, the zoo keeper stopped dead. Right, I'm fed up being the bad guy here, I jumped onto the fence and jumped over it. I approached the Lioness and the now sleeping Nessie slowly. The lioness was distracted by the zoo keeper who was now backing away. The lioness was deciding whether or not to chase after him, or to stay with Nessie. She got up and slowly went for the zoo keeper. The zoo keeper, seeing what I was doing backed away over to the fence, ready to jump back as soon as I grabbed Nessie.

"Nessie," I whispered, she woke up and waddled over to me, the zoo keeper jumped over the fence. The lioness, disappointed, turned back saw me and went for me instead. I look of hatred in her eyes. I ran with Nessie, jumped over the fence and collapsed, just having enough time to pass Nessie to Rose.

"Right, let's head to the penguins, hopefully there'll be no problems this time, and at least penguins can't eat you if something does happen," I said, getting up and taking Nessie off Rose. Nessie waved to the Lion and she growled playfully in return, wanting her "cub" back.

We went to the Penguins, the tigers, the lemurs, the gorillas, and the petting farm. Alice was the last out of the petting farm, she loved the Chinchillas.

We were at the gift shop now; Rose took Alice and Bella to the restrooms while Emmett, Edward, Jasper, Nessie and I were looking at the fish. Rose came back, running, with Bella and Alice close behind.

"Run Jake, run!" she said, I grabbed Nessie, Emmett, Edward and Jasper and ran, I didn't know why, but it was probably best to trust them when they said run.

"I'll sue you!" Someone shouted.

"You do that!" I shouted back, "My name is Emmett Cullen!" Emmett laughed, taking it as a joke. We jumped back into the pink mini bus and drove off.

"So why was I to run?" I asked once we were out of the zoo.

"AliceandBellasetalltheanimalsfreeandthelionsweregonnagoafterNessieagainandyou'regonnagetsued, wellEmmettisandtheelephantsalmostsquashedus," Said Rose. Right.

"Rose, slower?"

"Alice and Bella set all the animals free," she said. THEY DID WHAT?

"Oh," I said, trying to keep my calm. A noticed a white fluffy thing sitting on Alice's lap.

"Alice?" I asked, she looked up, smiling.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!" I shouted, almost crashing into the car in front when the thing jumped.

"It's a chinchilla!" she said excitedly. Oh right, a chinchilla, how cute. NOT! THERE'S A CHINCHILLA IN THE BUS, A CHINCHILLA! WHAT THE HELL IS A CHINCHILLA?!

They are gonna have a lot of explaining to do when they got home. I laughed out loud. I opened the door for them and we went into the house. Carlisle and Esme were already there. They looked angry-ish.

"We got a phone call, it was from the zoo," said Esme.

"I gotta go," I said and ran, laughing.

Ta daz! What you guys think? Was it funny?

Review and tell me what you think, pleasie. *Puppy dog face*

Danka sehr.