The two agents strode through the maze of hallways with a steady tempo. Illya's hand was placed on Napoleons shoulder, and the senior agent guided the Russian by those means. Illya's steps were confident and firm. He fully trusted Napoleon's guidance, so he didn't second guess a single step as they marched towards the unknown location.
Finally, Napoleon turned to enter one of the rooms attached to the hallway. "Here we are!" Napoleon announced. Then he detached his friend's hand from his shoulder saying, "If you would excuse me for a moment, I need to have a word with the natives."
Illya maintained his position, now far too disoriented to be able to tell where he was or what was around him. He noticed the sound of the room firstly. Most rooms have a sort of hollow sound, at least to some degree. But this room sounded very, very full; with what exactly, he couldn't tell. He heard distant voices softly murmur and he wondered if it was about him. He also heard almost a constant stream of mechanical noises. Nondescript zips and tappings also flooded the air. Illya recognized these sounds, but could not instinctively identify them just yet.
Illya let his nose sniff the air. He noticed that this room smelt similar to his office, only all of the scents, save that of the cologne, seemed to be magnified here. He smelt much paper and ink. The room lacked the sterile and cold sort of smell, so at least he could be certain he wasn't in the lab. That was good to know. In the lab, if he bumped into something, or knocked the wrong thing over, the repercussions could be…well…deadly. But this room smelt more of paper and less of chemicals. Illya was now convinced it was quite a large and it also had a distinctly feminine fragrance. He guessed there were probably at least four different candles lit in the room. He had been in this room before, and now Illya recognized it.
Soon, he heard his partner rejoin him. "Records keeping?" the Russian guessed.
Napoleon seemed genuinely impressed, but not necessarily surprised by Illya's perspicacity. "Very good," he said, "Yes, we are indeed in Records. With me is Miss Kelly Kauola."
Illya extended his hand, mentally trying to recall an image of the lady in question so that he could put a face with a voice. He felt her grasp and shake his hand politely. From the angle of the hand, he guessed she had to be shorter than himself. From the girth of the hand, he also concluded that she must be a bit stout. This information was all helpful, but he really couldn't make an identification until he heard her voice.
Kelly smiled up at the bandaged agent. "Welcome to Records, Mr. Kuryakin," she said cheerfully.
Ahh, now he recognized her. Of course. She was the small Hawaiian woman with the cute voice and the perky nose. Illya liked her. He was always impressed by her ability to maintain her ethnic individuality amongst all these white Americans. Of course, he realized that the Hawaiian Islands were a part of the United States now, but Kelly was still distinctly tropical, even in the middle of New York. She was proud of her heritage and never tried to hide it. Illya envied her that freedom. If he had been as openly Russian as she was openly Hawaiian, it would not go as well for him in that sensitive country. He smiled politely at her in recognition, "Miss Kauola," he greeted.
"Miss Kelly here says she has a few things she'd like for you to help with," Napoleon said, careful with his phrasing so that Illya wouldn't feel he was being handed over to a babysitter.
"Yes," Kelly said, "If you would please come with me, Mr. Kuryakin…"
Illya soon felt the small woman grabbing hold of his arm and pulling him lightly forward. As Illya was escorted farther into the room he heard his partner give a quiet farewell of, "Have fun."
Kelly stopped walking and said towards the room, "Girls, this is Mr. Kuryakin of Section Two. He's going to be helping us today."
Illya heard a small chorus of "Hi's" and "Hey there's", and a fair amount of girlish giggling. Then he heard one voice ask, "How long can we keep him?" and then the rest of the girls erupted in light squeals of laughter. Illya inwardly winced, these girls sounded much too young and far too immature for his taste.
Kelly's voice changed to exhibit a "no nonsense" tone as she replied, "He's been kind enough to stay for the remainder of the workday. Anything after that is still uncertain. But he's to be treated respectably as your superior. Remember, he is an enforcement agent from Section Two and shall be treated with the according degree of courtesy."
Illya heard several faint and only slightly convincing voices say, "Yes, ma'am."
Soon, Kelly's pressure returned to Illya's arm and she gently spurred him forward again. "I do apologize," she said quietly. "They are good at their work, but unfortunately, most of their time is spent reading and typing in various folders. They regrettably get a little overexcited when men come to visit; especially men as attractive as yourself."
Illya hardly had time to respond to this before Kelly was talking again.
"Now," she said, quickly changing the subject, "Mr. Kuryakin, as I'm sure you know, we at UNCLE take to tape recording the interviews and interrogations we conduct; and we keep those tapes on record."
Illya nodded, trying to memorize their path through the room in case he had to find his way back again.
"Well, in an effort to cut costs, over the past few months, we have been reusing old tapes from affairs long since past and have been taping over them with our new interviews. Now, the trouble is, the labels on the existing tapes no longer apply to their content. We need you to listen to the tapes and relabel them accordingly. Do you think you're up to that?"
"I don't see why not," the agent stated.
"Good!"
Illya felt himself being meticulously guided to stand in front of something. Then he heard Kelly's voice say, "There you are, Mr. Kuryakin. You can sit now. There's a chair under you." He cautiously sat down and then listened to further instruction.
"At the beginning of each tape, the interrogating agent should state his name, the name of the person or persons being interrogated, the case number, and then the date. All you need to write down is the case number and the date. And write it on these labels." She moved his hands to rest atop the stack of sticky labels on the desk in front of him. "Then you peel it off, and stick it on the front of the tape." Kelly placed one of the small tapes in his hand and let him fell all around it until he could picture it in his head. "Stick it right…here…" She manipulated his hand into the proper shape and then rubbed his fingers across the existing, incorrect label.
Illya nodded thoughtfully, feeling around the desk and creating a mental image of his workplace.
She explained how to use the tape player machine and where he could put the tapes after he had labeled them. With every piece of instruction, Kelly directed his hands so that he could "see" what she meant. She was extremely helpful.
"Do you have any questions?" she asked at last.
"Will I be working here alone?" He didn't like the idea of being abandoned in an office with which he was unfamiliar, without the ability to ask someone for assistance if he needed it. But at the same time, he dreaded being surrounded by any of those little girls if that were his only other option.
"Yes," Kelly answered. "The girls are in the outer office where we do all of the daily work and printing. You are in the inner office where long-term files are stored and altered. My private office is through a door directly behind where your desk is. If you'd feel more comfortable, I could leave my office door opened so I could hear you if you called for me."
Yes, Illya liked this woman very much. He nodded and squared his shoulders, "That would be helpful, thank you."
"No trouble at all."
As he listened to her leave, he counted the number of steps before he heard her door open. Four strides…that would probably be about three strides to Illya. Then, he turned his attention to his desk and diligently set about completing his assignment.
Author's Note: For all of you M*A*S*H* fans out there, yes, I did base the Kelly character off of Nurse Kelly from MASH. I always loved that character and thought that she didn't get highlighted as much as she deserved. So this was my way of making up for that.
Hope you enjoyed the chapter! Leave a comment if you'd like!
--Monker
