Chapter 18
SCENE I
"What's with the costume change?"
"Huh?" Lois didn't get her meaning.
"The shirt, why the change? Plaid is usually Clark's signature style, not yours"
"Laundry day." Clark supplied.
"What was wrong with the shirt you were wearing earlier today?"
"—torn."
"—stained."
Chloe looked from Clark to Lois and back, narrowing her eyes at them. Something was amiss. "Which is it, stained or torn?"
"Both. I spilled make-up on it and then it got torn as I was taking it off."
"And I didn't get to the laundry today." Clark added as he pulled a chair at the table out for Lois.
Chloe still thought they were acting a bit suspicious. Clark sensed another question. "Chlo, there's no scoop here—so let's just eat."
"Good idea, CK. I'm so hungry I could eat the box."
Clark went to the fridge and pulled out a beer. He popped the cap and poured the amber liquid into a glass and placed it in front of Lois. "Chloe, Jimmy, something to drink?"
"I'll have what you're having CK."
Clark set a tall glass before Jimmy.
"What's that?"
"Milk, same as I'm having."
"Can I change my order?"
Clark laughed and flashed a brilliant smile. It was infectious. Soon, everyone was laughing, the awkward tension that charged the room finally dissipating.
SCENE II
Lois woke alone in the darkened room, feeling like she had walked 17 miles in the desert sun. She licked her lips and tried to get her bearings. She reached out expecting to find Clark, but the bed was empty and cold. Again. She surveyed the room, still feeling out of sorts. Her eyes came around to the bedside table, the numbers slowly coming into focus, benignly testifying that the time was 3:48 AM. He can't be working already, could he?
She padded down to the kitchen to get a glass of water or juice, anything to ease the drought conditions of her mouth.
She stood at the sink for a few moments, drinking her water and thinking about their evening. She didn't remember saying good night to Chloe and Jimmy. She didn't remember going to bed either. As she continued her wool-gathering, she noticed that the kitchen was in perfect order. Clark must have cleaned up after she'd gone to bed.
Her thoughts turned back to Clark as she began to wonder where he was. As if on cue, she heard a noise coming from the living room. She tiptoed over to investigate.
"Clark?"
"Hmmph."
"Clark, wake up."
"No. Sleep." And he pulled the blankets over his head.
She pulled the blankets off his head. "CLARK!"
"Huh?" His eyes flew open at her sharp tone.
"What's wrong?"
"This is wrong"
"Huh?"
"Why are you sleeping on the couch?"
" 's where I sleep." He yawned, blinked, and then closed his eyes again.
"IT'S WHERE YOU SLEEP?! WHY?"
That finally set the bells off in Clarks' head. He sat up, blinked, and tried to focus. Crap! I thought she'd had enough beer to sleep through the night.
"I snore."
"What?"
"I snore . . . and it keeps you awake . . . so I sleep here."
"Oh." She chewed her lip while she considered this information.
"Well, you weren't snoring just now."
"It doesn't happen all night, different times through the night. And I also get up really early, so I sleep here so I won't disturb you."
"Uh-huh."
She was having a difficult time buying it, he could see that. He would need more time to work out the kinks of this lie, but it was the best thing he could come up with on the spur of the moment.
"Have you seen a doctor?"
"A doctor? I don't go to doctors. Why?"
"I want to find a solution. I don't want to spend the rest of my married life with you sleeping on the couch. What will our children think? I can't believe I would have gone for it. Or that you'd agree to marry me if I was demanding that from you."
"I never said you demanded that I sleep on the couch."
"Why did you?"
"I just said I didn't."
"No, why did you marry me if I made you sleep on the couch because of your snoring."
"Again, I never said that you 'made' me sleep on the couch. And, you . . . that is, we didn't know the snoring was a problem until later."
"I see." She was chewing her bottom lip again. "So, you're saying that we never . . ."
"Yes, that's what I'm saying." As much as he hated spinning these new lies, he knew he had to cop to something. "We didn't know the snoring was a problem after we were already married."
"And nobody else ever said anything about your snoring before? You didn't know you snored?"
"Who else would've been able to tell me that?"
"Wh--?" She stared blankly at him, not sure that she understood what he was saying, but unsure of what to even ask him. Seconds stretched into minutes as she continued to digest all this information. At length, he broke the silence.
"Lo?"
"Yeah?"
"Can we talk about this tomorrow? I'm really tired, and I have to get up soon."
"Yeah, of course, we'll talk tomorrow."
