Sonny's POV
I couldn't believe this. My last secret, my last joy, my last love, was about to be exposed on a live television show in front of the audience and the millions of people who were going to be watching on their TVs this Saturday. This whole show depended on me, and apparently they all think I have what it takes to keep it alive. Myself, I thought I would embarrass my cast mates- I mean, I'm not even that good. They probably just think I'm amazing because nobody else in the studios is musical at all. Seriously, no one. Well, at least that's what I think. If there's someone who is, they aren't being open about it.
Just like me. I don't want people to know about it, but if it meant it would save my friends' jobs- I would. But I hate myself for agreeing even after I told them why I didn't want to. It made them seem almost selfish to put me on the spot like that, but Tawni probably didn't even know what Nico, Grady and I were talking about.
Ah, Tawni. I don't think she's going to take this well. If- by some miracle- the audience liked me, she might get a little jealous. I disliked even just thinking that because it makes me sound so full of myself. A girl version of Chad Dylan Cooper. I wouldn't want some stupid show to get in the way of Tawni's and my friendship.
I was saving her, though. She hadn't been the one to see the tape, though, either. How could she even depend on me if she hadn't any idea if I was good or not? How could she trust me, if in the end I let her down? Let everyone down? Nico, Grady, Zora, Tawni, Marshall, Mr. Condor- I shivered at the name- and him. I wasn't sure if Chad would be happy or sad to see me leave, or if he wouldn't even care. The thought tore my heart apart.
Even though I would never say it aloud, I, Sonny Monroe, was attracted to Chad Dylan Cooper.
Of course it wasn't love or anything, no way. But who wouldn't feel the slightest twinge of liking toward him? He's gorgeous, no one can deny it. He's also America's hottest teen jerkthrob/heartthrob, and there's those times when he's honest with me. Chad, and not Chad Dylan Cooper. I didn't know what about me made him trust me enough to actually open up, but just the fact that he would made me feel special. Special to him. And that's what made all the difference. Chad was something different, and I'd miss those cute moments we had together and his one sparkly blue eye. I smiled. My life would be so boring without him. I'd deny it aloud, but I really wanted him to be mine.
I let the thought of Chad and me drift, but then something happened. I realized something. I could make this into a song! Hmm…I'll have to think about the lyrics later, someone was coming down the hall.
"Knock, knock," I heard a certain blonde boy call as he opened the door to my dressing room. He invited himself in.
"Chad," I acknowledged him. I didn't want to start conversation, though. My recent thoughts sort of made me uncomfortable around him.
"How's Chad's favorite random doing?" he asked as he stood a few feet away from me. I followed suit and stood up. Since he didn't start out our talk with something negative- at least something I thought wasn't negative- I guess I would be honest. Just this once, though.
"Not so good." His facial expression was one I couldn't read: Understanding, maybe? My face turned to confusion. "What?" I asked him. He seemed to be debating something in his mind. Then his expression was back to the cocky, normal Chad.
"Oh, nothing, I just heard some rumors spreading around the studios about So Random!,"- I didn't like where this was headed- "and was just wondering if they were true? Even though I always knew this would happen someday, I was surprised by how long you guys have been stringing along."
I glared at him. That kind of stung. So Random! was my dream, couldn't he see how much that hurt me? It was the second-most important thing to me- yes, right next to music- and he was mocking me like he'd never heard of the word 'feelings'.
"How did you find out?" I asked him. It didn't sound like a question, though- my voice was cold, and so not me. I could see this shocked him. He wasn't used to the non-Sonny part of me, but he was going to have to see it every day after the show this Saturday. A jolt of unease hit my stomach as I realized how close this really was. Three days?!
I composed my face back to the angry expression I had put on and looked him straight in the eye. I had to look up though, he was a few inches taller than me. But how dare he mock my dreams and passions?
He raised his eyebrows as he took in my tone, and continued speaking. His voice was sort of like Mr. Condor's, but not near as deep. It was muted, soft, and- for some reason now- gentle.
"Sonny, I know how much this show means to you-" I cut him off. He was not going to dazzle me today.
"How. Did. You. Find. Out." I wasn't going to let him butter me up.
"There's word around the studios that So Random! is losing a lot of viewers. We don't know the percentage though. I overheard Cloudy and Rainy-"
"You mean Nico and Grady." I remarked coldly.
"Sure. But I overheard them talking about it and then something about ratings going through the roof after Saturday's show. Care to comment?" He finished with a smirk, pleased about knowing everything he wasn't supposed to know.
I sighed, relieved. At least he didn't know what might- might- make ratings go through the roof.
"Nope. Care to leave?" I offered with a smile, but my eyes were mocking as I made my way to the doors and held it open. When I turned around, I saw that he had followed me and his facewas just a few inches from mine. When he spoke again, his voice was caring and quiet.
"Good luck, Saturday. I hope you can save your show. Really." His sweet breath caressed my face.
And with that, he walked out of my lonely dressing room.
And I knew, as my heart fluttered, I wouldn't rest until Chad Dylan Cooper was mine.
