Woo! Suave Secrets! Yeah! Haha, enjoy!
"Gossip needn't be false to be evil – there's a lot of truth that shouldn't be passed around." – Frank A. Clark
Bella's PoV
I think I'm going insane. Completely and totally crazy.
I kissed a Cullen and I liked it.
Well, kind of. I mean, in the way that I didn't like it that much at all. Psh, yeah, totally didn't enjoy it.
But it wasn't completely revolting either. In fact, his lips were actually surprisingly soft compared to Jacob's. And warm and inviting and delicious–
Ugh. Cullen, remember?
Right. Me no likey Cullen. At all, in any way, shape, or form. Nada. Nothing.
But his lips, and his sexy, crooked smile, and the way his green eyes are actually just a light teal with yellow surrounding the pupil, making his eyes look green.
I closed my eyes and shook my head as I walked away from Edward's house.
My mind wandered back to our kiss and how were so confused by what happened after that we just stared into each other's eyes for a second. I remember thinking, How can something so very wrong feel so fucking right?
Then I remembered how I was supposed to react. Nobody noticed our intimacy, thank God. Not even Alice, who usually picked up on everything.
But after I sort of convinced myself that I didn't like having Edward's lips on mine, I started to think about Edward as just Edward, not Edward Cullen.
He was ridiculously good looking. Easily the best looking guy at Forks High School. His chaotic, bronzy-brown hair looked perfectly imperfect in all of its disarray. I even admitted to Alice once that I would like to touch Edward's hair once to see if it was actually as soft as it looked. And then I told her I was scared I would get lice while doing it to cover up my weird urge.
His skin was slightly darker than mine, but who's wasn't? His eyes absolutely amazed me. They made you think, which was really weird, since they were only a pair of eyeballs. But the whole blue and yellow rather than green made you look closer and think harder about him.
He had a freakin' perfect nose, even though I remember Emmett breaking it in eighth grade when Edward called me a slut, even though he didn't know what it meant.
He had a little scar of his left cheek from the time I stabbed him with a fork in fourth grade for making Alice cry. I forget why now, but apparently it had been fork-stab worthy.
His lips were thin, but full. They were always pulled into his amused, crooked grin, it seemed. Either he was smirking or he was frowning. There no in between that I'd ever seen.
He had a rather long, strong neck. His Adam's apple was prominent and I wanted to leave a hickey there pretty badly. Something about his Adam's apple just sent me over the edge with lust, which was so beyond weird.
Don't even get a girl started on Edward Cullen's body. She'll never shut up. It's muscular and lean and strong and perfection is so many ways. He's got biceps, triceps, pecks, an eight pack, quads, calves, everything. And, from what I've heard, he's got a huge penis. But that's just what I heard. Not that I care about that. 'Cause I don't. And not in the I'd-accept-him-anyway way. In the I'd-never-bang-him-if-I-had-the-chance way.
Yeah, sure, Bella, you keep telling yourself that.
Fucking emotions, fucking school, fucking teachers, fucking drama, fucking Edward... Oh, boy. Now I've got that idea in my head, too!
I leaned against a tree and moaned as images of Edward thrusting himself inside me filled my mind. And I'll bet it'd feel good too.
Ugh! I hated Edward, for Christ's sake! Hated him with an all-consuming, fiery passion. Passion that could easily be turned into lust. Which it already sort of was.
I mean, the idea of angry sex always got me excited. Jacob hated fighting with me though, and I haven't tried anything since then.
If Edward and I ever, in some alternate universe, did get...intimate with each other, Lord knows we'd fight just as hard as we loved. Oh boy. My imagination was wild today.
I could see it now, I wind up to slap Edward across the face, and he catches me, and then kisses me hard. Then one thing would lead to another, and life would be fucking wonderful.
Bella Swan! Get yourself together, woman! This is Edward Cullen we're imagining. The very same Edward Cullen that threw a baby shower for you last year at school. The very same Edward Cullen that sent that picture of you around the whole God damn state...
Tears welled up in my eyes. How could on boy, my enemy, get my emotions so mixed up? I hated him still, but that part of me was fading slowly as I reconsidered everything.
Edward was fun, nice, caring, kind, gorgeous, funny, smart, easygoing...perfect. But he could be so rude, mean, and disgusting at the same time.
And I couldn't even talk to anyone about this either.
If this became public, my life would be ruined. Not Edward's, mine. Edward was quite a bit more popular than me, and people usually sided with him. I'd get burned and Edward would stand by and laugh as my life crumbled down in front of me.
How could someone laugh at another person when they're so amazing with their younger siblings? I didn't get it. He was just beyond wonderful with Des. I'd never seen him so happy as when Des jumped into his arms when we got there. It was so touching and heart-warming and I seriously considered jumping into Edward's arms myself.
And his parents were so much more normal than mine. It felt nice to have an actual sit-down meal rather than eating whenever I got hungry. It felt like I had stepped into a sitcom where everything's just as it should be.
Dr. Cullen was actually very...tolerable. I felt terrible still for making him choke.
Edward even stood up for me kind of. He announced our kiss without hesitation or shame. It made my heart thump furiously and my whole body tingle.
I felt stupefied. All these jumbled up, love-hate feelings made me feel stupid.
Being alone with Edward in his room wasn't bad at all. Well, besides the fact that I thought about all of the things we could achieve on his very spacious, comfy-looking bed. But, otherwise, no big deal.
Edward knew Biology. I'd give him that. And even though I should have been paying attention, I wasn't completely there.
I was thinking about a million different things, like...
Would he play doctor with me?
Would he whisper Shakespeare in my ear?
Would we shower together?
Did he have magic fingers?
Would we ever have sex at the library?
Would he talk to dirty to me?
Would I talk dirty to him?
Would he fuck me hard, like I so desperately wanted him to?
And the one that surprised me the most:
Is he sick of this family feud?
I was over it. I hated that I was always waiting for another prank to hit me. I hated that my dad decided that it was his fatherly duty to remind me practically every day that Cullen's were rich dirt bags that didn't deserve anything they had.
More importantly, I hated that it restricted my social life. Seriously, the only girls that liked me at school were Angela and Alice, and the guys only liked me because of Emmett and my naked picture.
I wanted to be able to say hi to Jasper without having Rosalie or Edward whisk him away from "the evil Swan girl."
I wanted to know Edward the most. I wanted to know why he acted so differently around different people. I wanted to know why he's friends with Rosalie and Jasper. I wanted to know the Edward that Des knows as her older brother. I wanted to know what Edward did when he was away from prying eyes.
Edward was one of the few people that never ceased to surprise me. Whether it was with a new prank or the fact that he apologized for everything, I was on my toes. And I liked that in a person.
I walked in my house through the back door and headed straight to bed. I had done way too much thinking to stay up any longer.
--
School was...alright. Better than it had been since the beginning of the year. Alice didn't get the nurse, she was Lady Capulet. Rosalie was the nurse, which sucked some serious balls. Emmett was Mercutio. And Alice noticed that Jasper was Benvolio, even though he hadn't been at the tryout.
All in all, it was alright.
Edward and I didn't talk at school, which was fine with me. I think.
It was what was expected of us, so I supposed that's what we were required to do.
But people bugged us pretty horribly. Someone must have spread the kiss around. In a small town like Forks, people know that you're in trouble before you do. Gossip is our favourite sport.
I was walking to Biology when Mike ran up beside me. Here we go...
"I hear you kissed Cullen."
Good for you, Mike! Your brain processed something today!
"He kissed me, actually," I replied with a toss of my hair.
"I heard you kissed back," Mike answered with a grin.
"Oh yeah? Is that right?" I asked mockingly. "When have I ever given a shit what people say about me, Mike? Hmm? Remember the time I was supposedly pregnant? Or a lesbian? I've dealt with more rumours than you have tits."
Mike opened his mouth and closed it.
I opened the Biology door and walked in, smiling smugly at my quick wits. I sat down beside Edward, still grinning.
"How about these rumours, huh?" Edward asked with a smirk. "Apparently we've been having sex for years and the fight is just a cover for our love."
I snorted and Edward chuckled.
"Oh, did you hear that I also discreetly grabbed your cock during the kiss, too?" I asked, giggling. "I mean, honestly? Could people get more ridiculous?"
"Or what about the one where Ms. Wallace had to break up apart 'cause we were going at it so hard?"
I laughed loudly and then noticed that the entire room was silent. People were staring at us.
I looked at the table, blushing.
Edward cleared his throat nervously. "So, apparently they're allowed to talk about us, but we're not allowed to talk to each other. Isn't that weird, Bella?"
I shoot him a thankful glance.
"Yeah, really weird... Kind of like the rumour about us planning to elope, just like Romeo and Juliet," I replied with a grin.
Edward laughed loudly. "Seriously? Jeez, we're rebels. My mom's going to kill me."
And then people went back to talking amongst themselves.
"Thanks," I murmured.
"My pleasure," Edward assured me smoothly, grinning. "Oh, I definitely got a ninety-five for my poem."
"What?" I asked, my mouth dropping open. "No way! That's so awesome, Edward!"
I threw my arms around his neck spontaneously. His arms snaked around my waist and he squeezed me tightly.
Once again, the room was silent.
I pulled away slowly, blushing.
"Ha, got you all," I stammered. "We wanted to see if you'd fall for it."
The class gave us confused looks before slowly going back to normal conversations again.
"Sorry," I muttered, putting my hand on my forehead. "I'm an enthusiastic tutor, and when my people get high marks, I get excited, and that usually ends up in affectionate gestures, and–"
"It's alright," Edward assured me with a grin. "I'm glad someone gets that excited or their students doing well."
I blushed and turned back to the front.
Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, I needed to calm down. Or avoid Edward or something. This was getting a bit ridiculous.
"The affections are like lightening: you cannot tell where they will strike till they have fallen." – Lee Iacocca
Edward's PoV
She hugged me, she hugged me, she hugged me... I kept chanting over and over in my head as I made my way to Chemistry.
That whole hour was so normal, but so perfect. We had a civilized conversation, we laughed with each other, we defended each other, she hugged me, she hugged me, she hugged me!
I was in shock for a split second, but then I realized what an opportunity this was, and I'd probably never get it again, so I hugged her back. And she didn't pull away until she realized that we were being stared at either. And she didn't yell at me, and I sure as hell didn't yell at her.
I stumbled into the classroom and flopped down in my seat beside Jasper and in front of Rosalie.
"What the hell was that, Edward?" Rosalie hissed behind me. "You were way beyond friendly with Swan today. What gives?"
I shrugged. "I promised my parents I'd treat her like a person from now on. It's my punishment for sending that picture of her around."
Jasper shot me an amazed look. He probably knew better than to believe that this was a punishment for me. I loved every second of it.
"Oh, okay," Rosalie murmured as she leaned back in her seat. "That makes sense."
Jasper and I looked at each other and smirked. I had a feeling he'd be inquiring about all of this later.
Once we finished our assignment, we were allowed to leave early, so I finished as quickly as possible and left for my locker.
I passed by the Gym and noticed that Bella was lying on the floor, her shirt drenched in blood. I dropped my Chem books and burst through the doors, pushing through the crowd before dropping to my knees beside Bella.
Bella groaned, her eyelids fluttering shut. Her nose was bleeding out a river of red. I pulled her into a sitting position so she wouldn't choke on her own blood.
"What happened?" I asked the group surrounding us.
"She ran into my elbow while I was shooting the basketball and then she slammed into the wall," one guy answered. "It just happened less than a minute ago."
I nodded, picking Bella easily up. "Tell Coach Clapp that I'm taking Bella to the nurse. She'll probably have to go home, too."
Everyone backed away slowly as I carried Bella out of the gym and down the hall into the nurse's office. She jumped out of her chair.
"Oh, Bella!" she gasped. "I thought you'd gotten over your clumsy stage."
Bella gave a weak laugh. "Not yet, Mrs. McCloud."
I smiled down at Bella.
"Well, let's get you cleaned up and then I'll check out your nose," Mrs. McCloud announced, grabbing some paper towel and wetting it.
I grabbed some too and began wiping Bella's neck gently. There was blood everywhere.
"You don't need to stay, Mr. Cullen," Mrs. McCloud murmured as she wiped Bella's chin. "I can handle this."
"I got let out of Chemistry early," I assured her. "And, besides, Bella is supposed to be coming to my place tonight."
"I am?" Bella asked quietly.
"Yes," I reminded her.
She just nodded and closed her eyes.
I began wiping her lips and cheeks. She winced when I wiped the tip of her nose clean.
"Did that hurt, Isabella?" Mrs. McCloud asked.
Bella just grimaced.
"Might be broken," Mrs. McCloud muttered. "She should probably get an X-ray."
"I'll take her," I offered.
"Are you sure, Edward? You don't need to take care of her..."
"It's fine," I assured her. "My pleasure."
Mrs. McCloud nodded. "Let's change your shirt quickly, Miss Swan. Do you need help?"
Bella didn't answer.
"By George! She's fainted!" Mrs. McCloud exclaimed. "Hurry up, Cullen. We have to change her shirt and get her to the hospital!"
"Ch-change her shirt?" I stammered. "Mrs. McCloud, I don't think–"
"Oh, save it, Mr. Cullen," Mrs. McCloud snapped, pulling Bella's arm out of her sleeves. "I know you've seen worse."
Wide-eyed, I began helping Mrs. McCloud pull Bella's shirt over head. Mrs. McCloud threw it in the garbage and I tried not to stare at her light blue, lacy bra.
We pulled on an old FHS t-shirt that was several sizes too big, and then I carried Bella out to my car and took off for the hospital.
Bella groaned, her head rolling around as I sped around curves.
"Please don't puke in my car," I whispered.
"Pull over," she begged. "I'm gunna throw up."
I slammed on the brakes and pulled over to the shoulder of the road. I undid Bella's buckle for her as she grabbed the door handle and let herself out.
She dry heaved a few times before her lunch hit the pavement. All I could think was, Thank God she asked me to pull over.
She fell back against the seat, pulling her feet back in the car and shutting the door.
"Sorry," she murmured, looking a bit sick still.
"Not a problem," I muttered, taking off again. "As long as you don't puke in my car, we're good."
"The smell of blood always makes me sick," she explained, holding her stomach. "And there was a lot of it this time."
I pulled around to the emergency room doors and shut off the car. I got out and walked around to Bella's side. She had the door open and she was trying to stand up.
"Can I give you a piggy back ride?" I asked her, taking her hand.
She nodded, I turned around, and crouched down, letting her lock he arms and legs around me. I kicked the door shut and walked into the hospital with Bella on my back.
"Hello, Mrs. Weber," I murmured to the nurse at the desk. "Is my dad here?"
"Yes," she answered slowly, scowling at Bella. "Do you need him?"
I nodded.
She huffed and stood up. "Follow me."
I followed Mrs. Weber to the closest ER room where my dad was stitching up a little girl's finger.
"You're doing great, Janet," my dad assured her as he pushed the needle through her skin. "I'll just bandage this, and then you can go home."
The little girl's lip trembled. "Thank you, Dr. Cullen."
"Oh, Janet," Bella murmured weakly. "I help her at playschool. She's Lauren Mallory's little sister."
My face involuntarily scrunched up in dislike. Lauren Mallory was disgusting.
"Janet's nothing like Lauren," Bella assured me, as if she knew what I was thinking. "Janet's more like Mr. Mallory. He's a sweet old man."
I noticed the man holding Janet's other hand. He wiped away her stray tears and kissed her forehead with a warm smile. I would have never guessed he was the dragon's father.
"You're all done," my dad murmured gently. He handed her a sucker. "Here you go, Janet. I'll see you in a couple weeks, okay?"
She nodded, looking at her red sucker. My dad left to clean his tools and Mr. Mallory picked Janet up off the bed and walked away, snuggling her.
I hoped right then and there that I could be half the father he was right now.
"Hey, Dad," I greeted, letting Bella sit on the table. "Bella need to get checked out."
Dad looked at me with a scowl and then noticed Bella on the table, barely able to sit up. Her nose was still bleeding.
"What happened?" my dad asked, getting over the feud and acting professional.
"Ran into a guy's elbow and then kissed the wall," Bella mumbled.
My dad chuckled while he snapped on some new gloves. "Only you, Bella, could accomplish something like that."
Bella smirked weakly.
My dad began pressing around. Bella winced every once in a while.
"Hmm," my dad murmured to himself, pulling away. "It's not broken, but it will be bruised for a while."
"She fainted, too," I added, wanting nothing to be looked over.
"Shut up, Edward," Bella hissed through her teeth. She looked at my dad pleadingly. "Really, Dr. Cullen, it's nothing. There was just so much blood, and I hate blood."
Dad nodded thoughtfully. "Just take some Tylenol or something for it."
Bella let out a sigh of relief, blowing some blood off her lips.
"I'll let the nurse help you with the nosebleed, and then you can head out," Dad told her. "Edward, can I talk to you for a second?"
I rolled my eyes at Bella with a grin and followed Dad out into the hallway.
He shut the door and we stood off to the side of the window.
"Edward, why are you taking care of Bella Swan?" he asked, shoving his hands in his pockets.
"She got hurt?" It was a question because I didn't know why he would ask such an irrelevant question.
"But why you?" he pressed quietly.
"I dunno," I mumbled. "She was supposed to come to our house today to tutor me for English anyway."
My dad let out an exasperated sigh, rubbing his forehead with his palm. "You're still a Cullen, Edward. She's still a Swan. I'll tolerate her, I'll be polite, but I don't want you on over-friendly terms with her."
I scowled. "Dad, don't–"
"No, Edward," my dad interrupted me, holding his hand up. "Don't forget who you are. Stop hanging out with her, son. She's still a God damn Swan, for Christ's sake!"
By the end of his rant, he was yelling.
"Whatever, Dad," I muttered, going back into the room.
I closed the door behind me and shook my head.
"Are you ready to go back to my place or do you want to go home to sleep or something?" I asked wearily, sick and tired of this fight.
"I think I'll call my mom," Bella answered coolly, holding a Kleenex under her nose. "I'm a 'God damn Swan', remember?"
"Bella–" I groaned.
"No, Edward," she interrupted, tears in her eyes, even though she was smirking. "Your dad's right. We can't forget who we are just because of some play and some tutoring. You're a Cullen, I'm a Swan, and by some stupid rule, we have to hate each other."
"Please don't make us end up like them," I mumbled hopelessly. "I thought we could be different."
"Me too," she whispered so quietly that I wasn't sure I was supposed to hear it.
I shuffled out of her room more depressed than I had felt in a long time.
So, this is only a minor conflict. Not even a big deal. Don't worry about it.
This is the first time I've made Carlisle evil in my fanfics, and I don't like doing that. Freak, Carlisle's my favourite!
To all my The Dirty and the Delicate fans, I'm dreadfully sorry. I'm deleting the story until I find inspiration, 'cause I hate looking at it and getting depressed because my muse is being a dink and doesn't like me right now. As soon as I find the inspiration, I promise to repost it all. But, right now, it just ain't happenin'.
In saying that, I will be starting a new fanfic in its place. I have a zillion ideas that I'd love to write, so I thought I'd do one that I have fresh inspiration for.
Anyway, that is all. These chapters are always way long. Like, minimum, twelve typed pages. I'm so damn proud of myself, haha.
Review!
