I LOLED at some people's comments for last chapter. So I guess I should make it clear that Ichigo was not in the middle of the road. He was in the crosswalk and it was the pedestrians turn to be able to walk across when he was hit by the car. Sorry if anyone was confused by that. Any who, new chapter and there is a music selection in this one.

Chapter 18

[A Beautiful Piano Song - feat. Symphony Orchestra - Jervy Hou]

("Grimmjow…Gri-Grimmjow, please pick up. Please…")

The lights in the auditorium were low, only the stage illuminated. The audience was silent, all listening to the music that was being produced by the orchestra. The melody from the piano was calming and the ears enjoyed how the harmony reverberated off the symphony hall's ceiling. The violin began to strum and everyone could feel their skin tickle and the hairs on the flesh rise. The pianist continued to press every note perfectly, the melody going straight to everyone's heart and igniting something inside them.

("…Where are you, Grimmjow? Why-why aren't you answering your phone?")

This was Grimmjow's time to shine. After only being in the orchestra for three months, he had persuaded Byakuya to let him compose the music for one concert. He wanted to show these people that he didn't only have to talent to play the piano, but to create amazing and earth-shattering music. If he nailed this his dream of becoming a composer would be one-step closer. He knew he could do it and when Byakuya had given him a chance he had quickly gone to work on creating a few songs to incorporate with the the night's regular schedule. He had been able to get one of the composers that worked at the symphony hall to help him, but most of the work had been done by him. He had researched and worked with the various musicians, making sure everything would come together perfectly.

("…S-something bad h-happened. I-Ichigo…Ich-Ichigo…was hurt.")

He smirked to himself when he listened to himself playing the song he had written. It always felt good when he could hear his own music. It was just like when he had written for Ichigo. The feeling of great achievement in being able to create something so beautiful and impressive was all he needed. He knew he was a confident person, but when it came to his music, he wanted it to always be perfect. He never wanted anything out of place and that's why he practiced so hard. That was why he strived to be open-minded about everything having to do with music. Whether it be tip, critiques, he took them all and turned it into something that could help him become better. He knew he wasn't the all-time best, but he wanted to be compared to the pianist and composers before his time. Mozart, Beethoven and even Ludovico Einaudi, were just to name a few that he hoped to be grouped with one day. He was still young, which meant he had a long way to go and lots to do, but he didn't mind. If it had to do with his music then he would do it. He would travel the world to play, to be able to compose and write.

He knew whatever he did; he would always have to thank his mom for being there every step of the way. She had never given up on him, even going so far as to push him harder. Doing that while trying to be a strict parent was hard for her, but she did it perfectly. He knew he could never thank her enough for being the perfect parent.

He frowned as his hands ghosted across piano keys. He had been thinking about his father recently, which was a shock to him. He never thought about that man, but after seeing how happy Ichigo was, talking about his own father, Grimmjow wondered about his own. He wondered why his father left. He wondered how he could leave his child and wife like that, without an explanation. He wondered if the man was just a dead-beat or if he had a real reason for going. Was he despised by his own father? Or was it that his father loved him, but hated his mother? Grimmjow didn't think he would ever know the truth, but sometimes he laid awake at night, wondering about it.

It had been hard growing up without a father figure in his life and sometimes he wondered if that was why he was gay. He knew that was a silly thing to think, but he had to figure it out all on his own. His mother never told him about the birds and bees, about what you were suppose to do to impress a girl. She never told him about anything pertaining to that and he usually got his information from other guys. Luppi had always been there too and Grimmjow had always saw the petite man as a woman so he never saw any problem with his thoughts. Before there was Luppi, there had been one girl, but he just couldn't find himself going any further with her or that kind of life. Don't get him wrong, he thought a lot of women were beautiful, but he didn't get that tingly feeling when he saw women. He didn't feel the urge to impress them, as he did with the guys. He guessed it was his downfall not to have some kind of manly figure in his life, but he didn't say that he regretted it. He had felt more relaxed about figuring out that he liked the same sex and he felt like he wouldn't be weighed down with false feelings.

He was glad that his mother had supported him when he told her. She had always been there for him and he had been worried that if he wasn't on the right side of the fence that all that support would disappear. It had only seemed to make him want to be more independent and do what he strived to, regardless of what people said or thought. He guessed that was why he was so worried about Ichigo having his own independence. He wanted the orange haired man to get back what he used to have and become his own person again. He wanted to see Ichigo in his normal element and that meant that he would have to pull away from the oranget. He could no longer be the person that kept him up on the seesaw. He would have to back away and let Ichigo do what he knew Ichigo could do on his own.

He had to let Ichigo listen to his heart, his soul and just choose his own path, whether it be right or wrong.


The sky was dark, the twinkling of stars hard to see in the city. Aqua eyes gazed up at the large sky, waiting for Hana to come around with his car. The young man had become his full-time assistant, but Grimmjow really saw him as a companion. He didn't like to boss the dark haired man around, but Hana did his job to a T and that meant whatever Grimmjow said.

It wasn't all bad though. They still hung out every now and then, Grimmjow even spending time with Ganju. They were really his only friends out there, including Ganju's sister, Kūkaku and brother, Kaien. It was kind of unnerving to Grimmjow that Kaien looked so much like Ichigo. The only difference between them was the hair and eye color. Their personality was spot on and Grimmjow feared getting to close to the dark haired man. The more he saw Kaien the more he thought about Ichigo and then he would become frustrated with himself.

He sighed and slipped his hands into his trouser pockets. He couldn't wait to go home and pass out on the bed. The night had made him utterly exhausted and he even felt himself falling over. He watched with tired eyes as his car pulled up and he quickly made his way inside.

"Are we going home, Grimmjow-san?"

"Yeah, Hana, home." He leaned back and slowly closed his eyes, feeling the vehicle start to move. He could hear Hana speaking to him quietly, telling him about all the things he had heard from Byakuya about his performance. He was happy that the stoic man had enjoyed it, but he couldn't show it at the moment. He was just dead tired.

"Have you talked to Ichigo-san today?" The blunet slowly slit his eyes open at Ichigo's name and realized that he hadn't. His day had been filled with practice after practice and then the concert. He had turned off his phone earlier that day because he would be scolded if his phone went off during any of that day's events.

"Naw, I'll call him tomorrow. He's probably up now, but I'm too exhausted to even say anything." Hana nodded, but said nothing else. Eventually they made it to the high-rise apartment and parked in the underground lot. The ride up on the elevator was quiet and Hana said his goodbyes when they reached his floor. Grimmjow rode the rest of the way up in silence, enjoying the soothing ride. Hearing the ding, he made his way out of the lift and down the hallway. Slipping his key into the door, he let himself into his home, locking the door behind him.

He quickly slipped his shoes off, throwing his keys onto the counter and making a beeline straight to the bedroom. He groaned, scrubbing his hands down his face and cracking his neck. Stepping into his bedroom, he started to pull at his tie, removing it an throwing it across the chair in his room. Next went the button down and then his pants, before throwing himself on the bed and feeling the softness under him. He didn't worry about slipping into the covers, knowing he would get hot throughout the night. He sighed and lifted his hands up and slipping them under his head. His eyes slowly began to shut close and before he knew it, he was a part of a deep slumber.


The day was new and the sun was already high in the sky. Grimmjow groaned, turning over to his side and curling his toes into the fluffy sheets. He slowly blinked his sleepy eyes open and gazed out into his bedroom with blurry eyes. The light from the sun brightened the entire room and he realized that he forgot to close his curtains again. A normal habit since he gained the floor to ceiling window in his room. He yawned and stretched his large body across his bed. Today was one of his off days and he was more than happy to enjoy it, maybe talk to Ichigo for a little while. He smirked at the thought of hearing that deep voice caressing his ears.

He slowly turned over and gazed out of the window before reaching for his cell phone. He frowned when he didn't feel it on the side table. Groaning, he slipped out of the bed and causally made his way over to his slacks and started to rummage through the deep pockets. Pulling out his cell phone, he noticed that it was still off. He sighed and pressed the on button, padding his way to the kitchen to figure out what he would eat for breakfast.

Setting his phone down on the counter, he made his way over to the refrigerator and started to search for ingredients to make him something to eat. Pushing aside a bottle of juice and looking through his drawer full of meats, he still couldn't find anything that would make his mouth water. Rising to a standing position, he closed the fridge door and sighed. It wasn't a good thing that he couldn't cook most Japanese foods. For some reason he wanted to eat something other than American food.

He heard his cell phone beep and looked over his shoulder. Making his way over, he reached for the cell phone and gazed at the screen, frowning at the large amount of missed calls and voicemails. He started pressing the keys and noticed that they were mostly from Orihime's cell phone and he wondered when he had put her number in there. He guessed Ichigo had told him to since the orange haired man had been spending a lot of time with her.

He sighed, pressing and holding the number one key on the phone to get to his voicemail. Putting the device on intercom mode, he dialed his password and listened to the automated woman speak about how many voicemails he had.

He listened to the first message, his frown deepening at the sound of panic and horror in the orange haired woman's voice. It sounded like she was crying and Grimmjow couldn't make much from it. He pressed the delete button and listened to the next message, only having the same reaction to the message left.

Moving on, he listened to Orihime crying over the phone before he felt his heart stop when she spoke Ichigo's name. The fact that something bad enough happened to the man to make Inoue cry was enough for Grimmjow to want to pass out. He could feel his hand shaking as he reached to go on to the next message. He noticed the messages was left earlier yesterday, which meant that he was almost two days late hearing them, by Japan's time standards. He was all ears, wanting to know what the hell had happened.

("Gri-Grimmjow, I-I don't know where you are, but I-I wish you would answer. I-Ichigo…there was an accident yesterday afternoon.") He continued to listen to Inoue try to hold back her sobbing. ("W-we were out an-and Ichigo was…hit by a car. Grim-Grimmjow, I don't know if he's going to make it or not. We've all been at the hospital for the last two days waiting and hoping. H-he hasn't woken up yet and the doctors don't kn-know if he ever will…")

Grimmjow's body was frozen and his heart felt like it had fell ten stories from his body. His ears were thumping with blood, but he could hear the woman's crying clearly before the call was disconnected and he heard the woman's automated voice over the speakerphone. Ichigo was in an accident? He had been hurt and Grimmjow was nowhere near the man. He could feel something inside him boiling with fear that Ichigo would never wake again and the thought of it made his heart burst open and flood with emotions he had been keeping inside himself.

Ichigo had asked him not to leave, that he wasn't strong enough to be there alone, but he left anyway. He had promised Ichigo that he would be all right. He had promised him that everything would be fine and that Ichigo could do this all on his own. Grimmjow's knees felt weak and his body collapsed on itself, dropping him to the tiled floor, his hands gripping the edge of the counter tightly. His sapphire eyes were wide as they gazed at the honey wood of the cabinets and he could feel the prickle of tears forming in the corners of them. How could this happen? Ichigo was supposed to be safe. He was supposed to be.

"He was supposed to be safe!" Grimmjow could feel the tears rolling down his face and his soul shattering at the thought of Ichigo not being okay. "…I have to be there," he mumbled to himself. "I have to." He lifted himself up and stiffly reached for his cell phone, ending the call. Ichigo was all that mattered at the moment and he would make sure he was there regardless of what happened.


"I apologize, sir, but the next flight to Japan is full. The one after that is not until tomorrow morning."

"You gotta be kidding me? I needed to be there yesterday. There's no way at all?"

"Unless someone wants to give you their ticket, then you will have to wait until tomorrow morning, sir." Grimmjow was in a fit on panic as he thought about what would happened if he waited another day to be near Ichigo. He lowered his head against the working woman's desk and she gazed down at him with a frown.

"This isn't happening," he mumbled, but the woman could hear him clearly. "I need to be there for him. I can't… I won't let him go without me by his side."

"Sir?" He glanced up and the woman's eyes widened as she gazed down into tearful blue eyes. She watched as he pulled away and before he could go, she reached for his hand. Looking at her, Grimmjow wondered what she wanted. "W-why don't you wait over there and I'll see what I can do, okay?" The blunet gazed at her with astonished and blurry eyes before nodding and seating himself in a chair near the entrance of the airport.

His body felt tired and he felt empty at the thought of losing Ichigo. The guilt in him was growing at leaving Japan in the first place after Ichigo begged him to stay. Was this a sign for him? He hoped, prayed that Ichigo would be okay. He knew the man was strong, but something like this could bring anyone down. He groaned, scrubbing his hands across his face. He wanted to call Orihime and get more information, but he didn't know if he could even deal with it. He didn't know if he could hear that Ichigo would never walk again or that he would never even wake up. He didn't want to hear that the oranget would be paralyzed. It was just something he couldn't hear without feeling even guiltier than he already was.

In the back of his mind, he was angry at whoever could just hit someone. His blood boiled at the thought and he wanted nothing more to find the bastard and skin him alive. He wanted to look the fucker in his eyes as he repeatedly hit him until the person's face was unrecognizable and leave the person to die in their own blood.

He felt his cell phone vibrate and he reached into his pocket, pulling the device out. He gazed at Orihime's name as the light on the phone blinked. He didn't know if he could speak to her right now. He needed to ready himself for this. He knew he was being cowardly for not answering, but he didn't know what else to do. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he pressed the call button and held the phone up to his ear, hunching his body over and looking down at the blue gray carpet.

"Gri-Grimmjow?"

"He-hey, Orihime."

"Thank Kami you answered! …D-did you get my messages?" Grimmjow shut his eyes tightly, trying to will away the tears that wanted to form.

"Y-yeah. Uh, I'm trying to get a flight out there right now, but my timing is bad, I guess. How, uh… how is he?" He listened to her take a shaky breath and his heart decided to thump a bit louder.

"Still no scenes of him waking up. The doctors said he might have suffered some brain damage when his head hit the car then the road. …I'm so sorry, Grimmjow. I should have been watching our surrounding more closely. I-I didn't think a car would just go when it wasn't even its turn. They just kept going as if they didn't just hit a person." Grimmjow could hear Inoue's quiet sobbing throughout their conversation and he couldn't blame her for what happened. He knew it wasn't her fault.

"It's not your fault, Hime. It's mine."

"What?" she sobbed and Grimmjow pinched the bridge of his nose before sighing.

"I should have…been there. I told him that he would be okay. He asked me to stay…and I just left. This could have been-"

"Grimmjow it's not your fault!" Grimmjow frowned, listening to Orihime. "You aren't to blame. Ichigo was doing so well, no matter how much he says he hasn't. He just misses you, that's all. He's been so independent and getting back to how he once was in high school. He wishes he could be by your side and that's what makes him sad and worried. That day…that day he was so happy. He had been talking about moving to America with you after getting eye surgery. He wasn't worried about anything, whatsoever and you made him that way. So don't you dare say it's your fault!"

The blunet was surprised to hear that coming from the orange haired woman. He never knew Ichigo had spoken to her about so much. "…Sorry, Hime."

"Just come home, he needs you here. Doesn't matter when you get here, just come."

"…Yeah, I'll be there as soon as I can."


The flight took longer in Grimmjow's eyes as he was flustered the entire time on the plane. He couldn't relax a bit and when the flight attendant asked him if he wanted to sleep, he quickly refused. He wouldn't be able to sleep until he knew Ichigo was okay, until he saw those white eyes and gazed at that those lips smiling up at him. Ichigo needed to be okay, for Grimmjow's sanity.

The moment he touched down in Karakura, he immediately got a cab to take him straight to the hospital. Inoue had told him which one and he made sure to keep it locked in his brain. He sat in the back of the cab, his body jittery and his mind running with so many thoughts. The sky was dark and he had wasted another day not being beside Ichigo. Three days since the man was in an accident and he was nowhere by the man's side. The guilt was driving him insane and he would break any law to be there even quicker. He saw the hospital come into view and he started pulling out money, throwing it at the cabbie and launching himself out of the vehicle. He ran up the flight of stairs that were connected to the large hospital and he went through the sliding doors.

The smell of the cleanliness and the sterile white walls made everything come to a crashing realization that he was actually standing in a hospital. He was there to see his partner, the one person who had made life so much better. He was the one person that brought light to his life and he could see his world shattering at the idea of Ichigo not being in it anymore. His legs were weak, but he continued to make his way deeper into the hospital, seeing Orihime sitting there waiting for him.

He made her way closer and when she looked up, he could see the whites of her eyes were red, the normal happy gray orbs were dull with sadness and pain. The usually happy smile was upside down and he could see the worry wrinkles on her face. He frowned down at her and he watched her stand from her seat.

"Everyone is in his room." Grimmjow just nodded and followed her to where Ichigo was. Walking down the long corridors of white, he felt himself getting sicker the closer they got to their destination. It was getting harder for him to push forward and he didn't know if he could see Ichigo. He didn't know if he could look down at him in the bed, knowing that there was a possibility that that as the last image he would have of him. He stopped walking, leaning against the wall of the hallway. His eyes were tightly shut and he felt himself start to shake.

"Grimmjow?" He could hear her voice, but couldn't find it in him to even move. "Come on, Grimmjow. You have to see him."

"…I-I don't think I can." He felt dainty fingers on his chin and he slowly opened his eyes, seeing determined slate gray orbs.

"You have to." He stiffly nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat and continued to follow behind her. When they reached the room, he watched Orihime push it open and he didn't want to continue forward. His feet were rooted, but soft fingers gripped his wrist and he was pulled inside, the door shutting behind him.

He gazed at anyting but the bed in the room. Yuzu and Karin were huddled in a couple of chairs, a dirty blond haired man sitting next to them. Ulquiorra was there and he watched Orihime make her way over to him. Rukia stood next to them and when he finally looked towards the bed, he saw Renji gazing down at it. His eyes refused to look at Ichigo. He just didn't want to see the damage that had been done. He knew he would have to look eventually, but he just wasn't ready to do that. He slowly made his way over, his eyes lowered and gazing at his feet.

The side of the bed came into view and he could see Ichigo's pale and bandaged arm. Sapphire eyes slowly rose and he gazed at the elevated leg hidden under the blanket. Ichigo's body was mostly covered but he could see the wrapping of bandages across the man's torso. The more he gazed at the oranget, the more he could feel himself getting sicker. His eyes landed on the lifeless face, one of Ichigo's eyes covered with bandages as well as his the bright orange hair, some strands peeking through.

Ichigo looked as if he was slowly fading away and Grimmjow didn't think he could see the oranget like this for much longer.

"We're leaving, Grimmjow." The blunet quickly looked up seeing mostly everyone rise from their chairs. "The doctors told us all we could do was wait, so I feel it's only right to give Ichigo his space. You're here now, so I'm sure he will be fine with just you." The blunet frowned, but nodded, watching everyone make their way out of the room. Yuzu and Karin stayed a little longer before making their way out as well, the blond man following behind them. He glanced back, seeing Renji still seating in his chair, his eyes never moving from Ichigo's face. He cleared his throat and pulled up a chair to sit on the opposite side. The silence was painful, but he didn't know what he could possibly say. It was already hard for him to be civil sitting near Ichigo.

"...A shattered skull that may have given him possible brain damage. His body is covered with gashes and wounds, some deeper than they probably should be. His right wrist was twisted and his left leg broken in two place. And don't get me started on his face. …What the hell took you so long?" Grimmjow frowned, gazing down at his hands. He was wondering the same thing, but he knew he had no answer.

"Does that really matter? I'm here now."

"You should have always been here." The blunet looked up seeing Renji's russet colored eyes gazing at him with anger. "You shouldn't have left in the first place. If you were going to take Ichigo's heart with you, then you should have been next to him 100%."

"I have to live my life, Renji. Ichigo and I both knew what we were getting into when I took the job in America."

"…He trusted you," Renji murmured and Grimmjow flinched at the revelation. "He trusted you with everything so much that he put his life into your hands and when he needed you most, you left him."

"This isn't my fault, Renji."

"Oh no?" the red head said, rising from his chair. Grimmjow could feel the anger rolling off of the man before him, but he continued to gaze into Renji's eyes. "Is it a mere coincidence that the same person who Ichigo attacked at the summer festival was the one that ran him over?"

Grimmjow's eyes narrowed and he could feel his jaw tightening. "What did you just say?"

"You heard me. He was the one that attacked Ichigo! Orihime saw it with her own two eyes! You're fuckin' psycho ex-boyfriend did this!" Renji was roaring and Grimmjow was surprised that the man hadn't pounced on him yet. "This is all your fuckin' fault. If you had left Ichigo alone in the first place, none of this would have happened. You ruined him in so many ways."

"Wait a minute-"

You don't deserve Ichigo's love!" Grimmjow's eyes enlarged and they flicked back and forth as they gazed up into Renji's tearful eyes. He could see the man's chest rising and falling rapidly. "I've done everything for him! I was there for him since we were kids! And you, you get what should have been mine! You left him! You let some guy hurt Ichigo and I refuse to let you hurt him any longer."

Grimmjow rose from his chair, not enjoying the fact that he was being looked down upon. "Hold on, Renji…"

"Get out." Grimmjow frowned, glaring at the man.

"I'm not leaving. I flew here for a fuckin' reason and I'll be damned if I let you kick me out. Don't blame your cowardliness on me. If you had any fuckin' guts you would have confessed to Ichigo long ago," Grimmjow yelled before sighing and running a hand through his hair. "I didn't come here to argue over this. I came here because I heard Ichigo was hurt and I care about him. I know I don't deserve him and I have never denied that, but don't fuckin' rub it in my face. And as for Luppi, I'll take care of that little shit myself."

Renji was still peeved, but he knew it wasn't the time to be throwing around blame. He could understand why Ichigo had fallen in love with such a man, but he just didn't want to accept it. He hated the fact that someone had hurt Ichigo in such a way and that person was tied to Grimmjow. "You won't need to. Orihime already filed a police report."

"It won't do any fuckin' good. His parents have money and they would do anything to keep him safe and out of jail. I have to take care of that personally." Renji frowned as he watched Grimmjow. "Just give me some time with Ichigo. …Can you?"

"…Whatever," Renji said as he made his way to the door. "But don't think for a second that this conversation is over. I still have shit to say to you." Grimmjow listened to Renji make his way out the door before he was left alone with Ichigo. He could hear the beeping of the heart monitor and he never heard it so loudly.

He snorted, rounding the bed and sitting on Ichigo's right side. "Shit…I know I don't deserve you. I wish people would stop rubbing it in my face." Lowering his head, he pressed his lips against Ichigo's bandages hand. "I'm so sorry for leaving, Ichigo. ...I'm sorry I got angry with you and that I wasn't there when you needed me. I hate to agree with Renji, but this is my entire fault. Luppi should have never gotten close to you and I hoped that you two would never cross paths."

He looked up, gazing at Ichigo's battered but serene face. If Ichigo never woke up, he would never be able to forgive himself. He knew no amount of apologies would fix this and even if he went after Luppi it wouldn't make Ichigo any better. He shook his head and lowered his face back down to the bed, his lips brushing against Ichigo's hand. He could feel the tears in his eyes falling and dropping to the white sterile sheets.

"I will make Luppi pay for this, whether it be with blood or his life. I won't let him get away with this." He slipped his hand into Ichigo's, softly squeezing it, wishing he could feel a squeeze back. Slowly pulling away, he gazed down at Ichigo's pale and broken body. He hated seeing Ichigo in such a way and it just fueled his anger. He knew when he saw those lavender eyes; he would explode with fury and fire until Luppi was laying fetal position and covered in his own blood. Maybe then, and only then would he be satisfied and his vengeance complete.


No wonderful miracles of awesomeness, just sadness and anger. I hope you guys enjoyed, even though not much really happened in this chapter. I'll see you next chapter.