The Twilight Twenty-Five
Prompt:
Apathy
Pen name: ladyinblue6
Pairing: Canon and non-canon
Rating: M

This is short.



Thank God FHS had February break. I wouldn't have been able to face Edward, or any of our other friends for that matter. After I took the time to realize that I had, in fact, turned into a bitch, I felt horrible. I called Edward out on being a prick after he got in that fight with Jacob and he had every right to break up with me for the way I acted. I was feeling too low to even text Edward, let alone see him in person.

I phoned my mom and asked if I could come visit her. I needed to figure my shit out and maybe get some sun while I was at it.

All day Sunday was spent packing. Charlie wasn't sure if he liked me leaving or not. The Kings had a couple of games and Charlie believed that I was their lucky charm.

"I'm coming back," I assured him. "I just need some time to figure some stuff out."

Charlie smiled and patted my shoulder. "I'll be waiting at the airport when you're ready to come home."

My flight wasn't due to leave until Monday afternoon, so I had some time to hang out with Jasper and Alice before I left. They practically forced themselves on me.

"We heard the news," Jasper said when I opened the door. They had junk food and movies.

"Oh?" I replied as I let them in.

"You look like shit," Alice told me.

"I feel like shit," I sighed. "Edward was right. I was being a bitch."

"Why don't you tell him that?" Alice asked while jasper popped in The Time Traveler's Wife.

"I'm so embarrassed," I said. "I just need some time. When I get back from Phoenix–"

"You're going to Phoenix?" Jasper interrupted.

I nodded. "I'm visiting Renee and figuring my life out."

"You should tell him," Alice warned.

"No, I don't want this to be a big deal," I argued. "Don't tell him. Please."

Alice sighed. "Fine, but he's going to find out, Bella. He's been checking his cell phone every five seconds and asking if anyone called for him. He's going to take you back, Bella. You just have to admit that you were wrong."

"I will," I assured her. "I'm just not as confident as Edward. He shouldn't want me back. Not after the way I've been acting."

"Why'd you take him back then?" Jasper asked. "He was an asshole to you and you didn't even think twice about taking him back after he said sorry."

"It's different," I mumbled.

"No, it's not," Jasper told me, almost sternly.

"Let's just watch the movie, okay?" I said.

We watched the movie and I got my crying done with. They both left at around 9:30. Apparently they were all hanging out at Garrett's house and I hadn't been invited. Edward was probably fine without me.

Rosalie came to my house at nine the next morning.

"Hey, Rose." I had no idea why she was here.

"Hey, Bella," she replied sullenly. "Listen, I just wanted to apologize for making you push Edward away. I never meant to be so mean. It's just, I thought it'd be fun to bug Edward like that because he's got such a short temper and I knew I'd get a reaction out of him. I didn't know he'd take it all out on you."

"No, it's my fault, Rose," I told her. "Seriously. Don't worry about it."

She smiled half-heartedly at me. "I'll, uh, see ya later, Bella. If you feel up to it, James is having a party or something tonight."

"I'll think about it," I told her. No one else needed to know that I was leaving town.

I got to Phoenix around suppertime. Renee was waiting for me. I hadn't seen my mom since September. I gave her a big hug and saved my tears for later. She would know something went wrong.

We ate some McDonald's before leaving the airport and going to the apartment I used to call home. It was the exact same as when I left home. It felt like I'd never left at all.

"So, spill," Renee said after I showered and put my clothes away.

I sighed. "It's about a boy."

"You have a boy and you didn't tell me!" Renee and I were more like best friends than mother and daughter.

"It was hard to keep to myself, but yeah, I had a boyfriend," I told her. She gave me a sympathetic smile. "He's on Dad's hockey team. Edward Cullen, Carlisle's son."

"Oh, yes, I remember him," Renee interjected.

"Anyway, we started dating in December, and things were great. I liked him more than I liked Sam by far. But, I got caught up with the hockey girlfriends and started acting like them." I sighed. "He had every right to break up with me, Mom, and I'm too embarrassed to try to talk to him about it."

Renee rubbed my arm. "Take all the time you need, Bella. I'm sure you'll figure it out."

"Thanks, Mom."

"Now, how about we make some brownies?"

We made our brownies and Renee told me about Phil, her latest boyfriend. He was only twenty-seven, and Renee was thirty-five, but she seemed happy, which was all I asked for. We watched old, romantic movies and I told her all about life in Forks, the good and the bad.

I didn't realize how much I needed Renee until she was comforting me while I cried over the latest breakup and the time that Edward and I had our big fight before.

"Hockey players can be dicks, Bella," she told me. "They're so passionate about everything and their emotions are always involved whether they know it or not. Sometimes it can be too much."

"But, I–" I what? Loved him? Maybe. "I pushed him away this time, Mom," I wailed.

"Did you ever think that there might be a reason behind that?" she asked gently. "I mean, besides the fact that you were hanging out with that girl."

"Like what?" I had no idea what the reason could be besides Rose.

"Maybe you're scared," Renee offered. "You're falling for the first time, Bella, and if you're anything like your father, you're scared shitless of that feeling."

"Could be," I mumbled, almost hating how insightful she could be. "Then why did I take him back the first time then? If I was scared, why didn't I just let him go when I had the chance?"

"You've always been selfless, Bella," she told me. "You probably couldn't stand seeing him so upset and you knew you held the key to making him feel better. But now that he's broken up with, you feel like you deserve it. Maybe you deserve a reality check, but there's no way things should end over a little spiff like that. Charlie and I used to fight over things like that every day."

"Okay, okay. Maybe you're right," I gave her. "I'll just… I don't know. I don't think I can face the music."

"If that's the case, then stay in Phoenix," Renee replied simply. "No one can force you to do anything, Bella."

I sighed. "We'll see."

We continued watching movies, eventually falling asleep together on the couch.

The next couple of days were spent meeting Phil, shopping, and laying out in the sun. Some of my old friends even stopped by for a visit, even Sam.

On Thursday, I got an unexpected visitor.

Edward.


Ooo, cliffy! I'm such a bag, hah.

Team Canada won gold in women's hockey tonight! Woo! Just a preview for the final on Sunday. ;) Sidney Crosby, if you ever read this, I love you and I'll see you after you win that gold medal. And you'll only be wearing that gold medal for the rest of the night.

Hah, classic.

Love,
Mary