A Time of Planning

It wasn't until about fifteen minutes after midnight that Maria and Georg came out of the drawing room and back into the ballroom. They walked hand-in-hand towards the rest of their party, and one would think that a single soul were dwelling in two bodies. While Max and Philomena were up to speed with Georg's situation, the other three only knew that Georg had been distant with his wife over the last week.

But one look at the two of them made the five of them sure that they had talked and come to an understanding. Max and Philomena could see in Maria's eyes that she now knew what Georg had been keeping from her; Liesl could see that her parents had talked and had come to an understanding; Dominik wondered if feelings had been spoken between the two, and he took the heavy expressions in their eyes to be exhaustion.

His theory seemed to have merit for Georg said, upon stopping in front of them, "I think it's time to head home."

Everyone nodded in agreement, the exhaustion after excitement catching up with them. So, after saying their good-byes to the Eberfields and their friends, the seven of them drove back to the villa in two cars.

Kristoph, Philomena and Liesl drove in one car, and Philomena gladly asked Liesl about the people she met and if she had any fun at her first ball. Liesl responded in the affirmative and gladly shared anecdotes of her evening. Worries about her parents soon went right out the window.

In the leading car, Max drove and Dominik rode in shotgun. Maria and Georg were in the backseat. Maria was falling asleep with her head on Georg's shoulder; his arm was draped around her shoulders and his gaze was out the window, not really seeing anything. Max had asked Georg if it was okay that he fill Dominik in, and Georg had nodded, knowing Maria's brother could be trusted.

Dominik could do nothing but listen and look back at his sleeping sister. More than ever, he wished he did not have to head back for school in a few days. Poor Ria…and poor Georg…and Liesl and everyone! Oh, no wonder Georg didn't want to tell her, I wouldn't want to tell her! Well, at least she's not angry and they're on good terms again…I wonder if they've confessed their feelings to each other…Georg will have had to have said it first, knowing how stubborn my sister can be…but he can be stubborn too…Oh, boy, what a mess…

The short drive back soon ended, and Dominik saw Georg wake Maria up with a kiss on her nose. They led the way into the house arm-in-arm. With tired good-byes, everyone split up to go to their respective rooms – it was clear that no one wanted to face the problems and plans facing them until the sun was out and shining bright, casting a more optimistic view on everything.


Georg and Maria did not make love that night, but it was the first time that Maria really considered it. But the simple fact was that she was too tired and drained to seriously consider it for more than a moment.

So, she just changed into her nightgown and got into bed before Georg. When he got into bed after the lights were turned off, Georg leaned down and kissed her forehead as he wrapped his arms around her.

Maria's eyes were closed, but she smiled. "You missed."

Georg smiled like the happiest schoolboy, though she couldn't see it, and whispered, "Ah, I see. I was never good at aiming when off a boat. How about here?" He kissed her left cheek.

"Not quite."

He kissed her right cheek. "There?"

"Nope."

He kissed her nose. "How about there?"

"You really don't have good aim."

With that, his lips descended on hers and gave her a kiss that left her breathless. "There you go," she managed to gasp, and snuggled closer to him. "Good night."

"Good night," he murmured, and they both fell asleep, content for now.


As usual, Georg woke up with the dawn. And, as usual, he took a full minute between waking up and getting out of bed to savor the feeling of Maria in his arms.

What a wonderful night and start to the new year it had been. It had been more than he could ever hope for. From the moment she had told him she had forgiven him on his birthday, Georg felt he had come to the end of a long journey. She had forgiven him, so now he could forgive himself. It was all he had ever wanted from her…

But he was a man in love, and he knew that, as such, he would always want more than just her forgiveness, though God knows even that was more than he deserved. And what had happened last night had given him hope that someday he could have more than her forgiveness and affection. Perhaps one day he could have her…all of her…including her love.

Perhaps you have the latter already.

Georg thought about this, but had trouble believing it. He remembered the night she had shown him her scars, had let him touch her, and had told him of her abusive past. The contempt she'd had in her voice when she spoke of her uncle, and the rage he himself had felt when he realized what her uncle had almost done to her the night she had left home. He also remembered the words she had given him right after she had accepted his proposal and as she touched her upper arms: "The bruises you made here…"

He'd physically hurt her. And by doing that, he felt he belonged in the category of her uncle. Even though Maria could care for him, even forgive him, he highly doubted that she could love him as he loved her after doing something like that.

The sound of a lark singing outside brought Georg out of his thoughts. His gaze refocused on his sleeping wife. Remembering all of the plans and preparations that needed to be finalized, Georg knew that he needed to put feelings to the side and focus on securing their future.

So, after feathering her lips with his own, Georg got out of bed being sure not to wake her.


Maria woke up to the sound of running water coming from behind the bathroom door, as she did almost every morning. But she didn't get out of bed just yet. Instead, Maria reached for the pillow Georg had rested his head on and held it, inhaling his scent.

Last night had certainly been eye-opening, or at least to her heart. At last, she could understand it now: she was in love. Completely and totally. But while that thought made her heart soar, the knowledge that he couldn't possibly return her feelings made her want to cry. When he held her at night and he closed his eyes – or when he had kissed her last night – did he imagine she was Agathe? You don't look a thing like her, the voice of reason sounded in her mind. But that didn't reassure her. When lights were low or off, the imagination could do a lot of things…

But before Maria could give into her tears, she sucked them back in and remembered what she had to be focused on: helping Georg plan and prepare for the safety and future of their family. So, determined not to let herself become depressed, unfocused, or mopey, she pushed the pillow away and got out of bed.


The following day, Philomena, Kristoph and Max left to return to Vienna. Once Georg got his orders from the Third Reich, Max was going to come back and stay with the Von Trapps until February; then he and Philomena would change places, since Kristoph would be in London on business for a few months. Georg was very uncomfortable with leaving Maria and the children alone, so the twins were more than happy to help with the situation.

Philomena pulled Maria in for a tight hug. "We'll see each other soon," she murmured. "You be strong, sweetheart, all right?"

"I will," said Maria, hugging tightly the woman who had become her older sister. She needed strength from wherever she could get it.


A few days after that, Dominik had to leave to return to school for his last semester. It tore Maria up to see him go, nearly as much as it had when he had to leave Salzburg the last time, now knowing that Georg would soon have to leave.

Dominik, worried for his sister and knowing that Liesl could sense something wrong, pulled her aside the day he left and confided in Liesl what would become of her father in a few weeks.

To his surprise, Liesl did not cry, though her eyes did get misty. Instead, she got up from the sofa and walked to the window, her arms crossed. "I remember when I was little when he would have to leave and ship out. My mother always put on a brave face for father, but neither of them could disguise the fear and sadness in their eyes." She sighed and covered her face with her right hand. "I hoped he would never have to leave again, and for this…"

Dominik followed her and rubbed her shoulder. She dropped her hand and looked at Dominik. "Why did you tell me? To tell me to look after your sister again? You have no need to remind me to do that, Dom."

Dominik shook his head. "I know you'll be nothing but wonderful to my sister, as you've been from the first day she came here. I know how much you two love each other."

Liesl nodded, her eyes getting misty again. "Both you and her have become my best friends."

Dominik smiled and pulled her into a hug. "She's always been my best friend. I'm glad I can have another one."

Liesl hugged him back tight in gratitude.

After a moment, Dominik pulled back and looked at her. "I'm telling you this now because you deserve to know now and be prepared. God knows the little ones are going to cry and I just…want you to have the chance to try and get used to it before he leaves."

Liesl nodded, and looked out the window again, biting her lip in hesitation. "If I tell you something will you promise not to hate me?"

Dominik, curious and a bit worried, motioned for them to sit back down on the couch and nodded. Once they sat down, she said, "You know how much I love my family, Dom; I would do anything for them, absolutely anything. But sometimes…I just wish I…oh, I don't know, I wish I was your age, or at least in university. After hearing all of your stories, and going to Vienna and the Eberfields' ball, I just…I don't want to have this restless feeling now because I can't do anything about it. Do you know what I mean?"

Dominik smiled and nodded. "I understand completely. I wanted to get out of the small town Ria and I lived in from the moment I became a teenager. I wanted to learn everything I could learn on the piano and go to all of the places they were composed. But I knew I just couldn't up and take off. I reminded myself that it would be best to at least finish school first, and I knew I couldn't just leave my sister. Thankfully, the full scholarship to the Vienna Conservatory coincided perfectly with Ria leaving home and going to the Abbey. It just worked out, and it's going to work out for you, I promise."

"Do you really think so?" asked Liesl, feeling a resurgence of hope.

Dominik nodded, smiling. "Someone once told me that, when you want something you just have to reach out and grab it. While that can be true sometimes, it should also include at the end: 'But before you grab it, make sure you've got your affairs in order.' I knew what I wanted for years before I went for it; I had to be ready to take it first. You'll be ready someday, Liesl, and you will get your chance. Just give it a year or two."

Liesl felt amazingly reassured, because he could understand how she felt and he had overcome it in his life. In gratitude, she hugged him. "Thank you, Dom, I will." When they pulled apart, she said, "I'm anxious to grow up but not impatient. I know where my priorities need to be right now."

Dominik nodded. "Some things in life you just have to work and wait for."


Days went by mercifully slowly, and the tenth of January saw Louisa turn fourteen. Like her father, she did not want a lot of fuss. In fact, she only wanted people to acknowledge her birthday by a sled race and her favorite dinner – plus any presents her family members would be happy to give out of love, which she got in abundance. The day provided a wonderful respite from the planning and preparing that was consuming her parents. Both of them had agreed not to tell the children until the Anschluss happened and he received the official summons.

"When did the American government first contact you?" asked Maria. It was the day after Louisa's birthday, and Maria was sitting on the couch in their adjoining sitting room.

Georg, who was sitting beside her, leaned his head back as he remembered. "Well, almost a year ago, so…around February last year, I believe. It started as some simple questions about submarine maneuvering, but as time went on the correspondence became more frequent and in-depth. My information and insight has proven quite valuable to them. Once Dr. Falk told me what he had heard, one of the first things I did was send a telegram to America." He gave her a small smile and got up off the sofa. "Today, the final result of my plea arrived."

He unlocked a drawer of his desk and pulled out a letter, which he brought back to Maria, sitting beside her again. Maria took the letter and read it to herself. Each line gave her further reassurance of a future. "Annapolis?"

"It's on the eastern coast of the country, very close to the capital."

"So that is where the Naval Academy is? My goodness, Georg, a position there? That's wonderful! But…they're not asking you to fight, are they?"

Georg smiled at her worry and shook his head. "No, the position is strictly teaching and also, if ever they need to consult me, the capital is very close."

Maria looked at the letter again. "So, according to this, they need you to report your presence in the country before the summer is over." She took a deep breath. "So, you did say that summer would be the perfect time to get out, right?"

"Mm-hm," said Georg, wrapping his arm around her and pulling her to him. "I've already taken most of the necessary steps. Once the Anschluss happens, the Nazis will be able to watch and trace all communications and transactions. So the fact that I have a position in America established is a very good thing; the Nazis will never know, at least until it's too late and we're gone. Also, I've transferred our finances to banks in Switzerland – famous for remaining neutral – all throughout the past year so the Nazis won't be able to take that, either."

Maria sighed at more good news, and hugged him. "I'm glad you have such an analytical, logistical mind – planning ahead to a T. You have no idea how comforting this is to hear and know."

Georg leaned them back to rest against the sofa cushions, both looking into the fire. "The only thing I have yet to figure out is how I'm going to slip from the Third Reich's clutches. I won't be able to figure that out until I'm there, though."

Maria took a shaky breath, and Georg held her closer, lifting her face up by the chin.

"Don't worry, Maria," he said softly.

Maria gave a tremulous smile and shook her head. "Not possible, Georg."

Georg returned her scared smile and pressed his forehead to hers. "I haven't lost faith, Maria, and I know you won't."

Wanting to feel reassurance in a non-verbal way, Maria shifted her head and their lips met in a kiss.

Ever since their first kisses of the New Year, the two of them had gotten more and more comfortable with initiating kisses. If one were to keep score, it would be pretty even between the two who would initiate. But it was not until this moment, after several minutes of innocent, hungry kisses, that more than lips were used.

Knowing what he was doing, Georg gently stroked her lips with his tongue. Maria felt a little nervous, but very excited, at the sensation and willingly opened her mouth and let him in. He took it slowly, allowing her to get used to the sensation until she herself mimicked his actions. They made out like teenagers for a good chunk of time, on the sofa in front of the fire, until both of their bodies screamed for oxygen and they parted.

Maria rested her head on his shoulder again, her eyes wide and dazed. "I didn't know people did that."

"Hm?" said Georg, just as dazed, stroking her hair.

"That people…um…used their, uh…tongues." Maria's face was the color of a tomato.

Georg let out a happy chuckle and held her closer to him, kissing her hair.

While they went no further that night, both were left very content indeed.


Two evenings later, Georg received a telegram. The children had just been put to bed, and Franz had only just gotten the telegram before he locked the doors. It was Maria who took it from him, immediately getting a bad feeling, and then waited in the bedroom for Georg to come out of the bathroom. She didn't dare open it, and release whatever the Pandora's box would unleash.

When Georg came out all dressed for bed, he immediately saw the envelope his wife held out for him. "This telegram just arrived for you."

He took it at once and opened it. "From Hans…" he murmured, unfolding the paper. He read it, and his lips pressed together so tightly they turned white. When he'd finished reading it, he crumpled the paper into a ball and threw it on the ground before he said, "I have to be alone right now," and left without another word.

Knowing what would be in the telegram, Maria picked up the crumpled ball of paper and smoothed it out so she could read it. It was, indeed, from Dr. Falk:

Georg – STOP – Anschluss official tomorrow – STOP – Expect your order to join their ranks tomorrow as well – STOP – I'm sorry – STOP – Hans.

"So…" murmured Maria, letting the paper fall to the floor as tears filled her eyes. "It's happened."

Knowing she should just leave Georg on his own right now, Maria decided to free her tears into her pillow, which she did before falling asleep.

She didn't know for how long she had been sleeping, but some time later Maria woke up to the feeling of shaking beside her in the bed. Her eyes flew open and, though she could not see much in the darkness, she could feel and hear Georg tossing and turning on his side of the bed. She could also hear muffled cries of, "No!" and "Stop!" and "Please!"

"Georg!" said Maria, reaching out and, finding his face in the dark, stroked and caressed it with one hand while the other held his shoulder. His heartbeat was flying, and his face was moist with sweat.

She felt him wake up with a violent gasp, and his hands found her arms. "Maria?" He sat up with her help and he wordlessly pulled her into a tight embrace. "Maria…" he murmured again, burying his face in the crook of her neck as he shook. Maria realized, by the wetness on her neck, he was starting to cry.

"Shh…shh…" Maria soothed, rubbing his back in circling motions. Her heart broke at his pain, whatever pain his nightmare had brought to him. Having comforted Gretl and Marta many times about nightmares, she "It's over, it's not real, it was just a dream…"

Gently she rocked him back and forth, remembering what he'd done for her on their wedding night; she was glad she had a chance to return the favor.

Eventually, Georg's crying ceased and he pulled away, obviously embarrassed. In the darkness she could see his outline, his hand wiping away his tears. He sat on the edge of the bed, his hands gripping the mattress, his head down. Maria could see, even in the darkness, that he was distancing himself from her – she wouldn't let that happen again.

So she reached out and placed her hand on his back and said, "If you don't want to talk about it, I understand. But I remember how you cared for me when I had nightmares, and when I cried. Please let me help you."

After a long moment of silence, Georg turned to look at her. But, frustrated by the darkness, he switched on his bedside lamp and then turned around fully on the bed. His eyes caressed her face before he lowered them, clutching her hands, saying, "In my dream, I saw you…being beaten by Zeller."

She hadn't expected that. "What?"

He sighed in frustration. "You don't know how angry I was when I saw him, at the Autumn Ball, what he was trying to do to you. I saw it again in my dream, only this time he wasn't drunk and overpowered you easily. He was torturing you and I…couldn't do anything, I was bound somehow, I couldn't break free."

"Georg," said Maria, cupping his face, bringing his eyes up to meet hers. "Look at me. I'm not beaten, I'm not down, and that didn't happen that night. I fought and you got him away from me. That is what's real, not your dream."

Georg came closer and pulled her into another tight hug. "I need you to promise me something, Maria."

"What, Georg?" she asked, stroking his back.

After a moment, he pulled his head back so he could look at her. "Promise me that you will be here, when I come back, unharmed and all right."

Maria's eyes filled with tears. "Of course I will. As long as you promise to come back to me alive and whole."

He kissed her forehead. "I will. I know what I'm doing on a submarine or a ship, and I'll be damned if I'm permanently taken away from my family."

Maria suddenly got a lump in her throat and nodded. "Let's…go back to sleep. We're going to have a long day tomorrow."

She reached around him and turned off the light, and his lips were on hers immediately after. She let the kiss last as long as she could hold her breath, then they fell asleep in each other's arms.

Maria wondered if they could have gone farther that night. Of course you could have physically. It wasn't until right before she fell asleep that she realized she wanted to try.


Dr. Hans Falk's words were, unfortunately, correct.

Maria laid in the bathtub, filled with hot water, at the end of this long day. Georg's suitcase was packed, and he was putting the children to bed right now. She understood why he was taking his time – God only knew how much he would miss them.

Never had she been prouder of the children than this morning, when Georg had sat them all down in the drawing room to tell them what the contents of the telegram he'd received at breakfast were: Seeing as how Austria was no more and now a part of the Third Reich, Georg had been ordered to join their navy and must report to their naval base at Bremerhaven tomorrow night. This meant he had to leave early tomorrow morning. The children had all tried their best to put on brave and optimistic faces for their father, even though the three youngest girls couldn't hold in their tears. While the boys had tried to keep their faces neutral and Louisa had paced angrily, Liesl did not seem surprised just sad. Maria wondered if Dominik had tipped her off – which wouldn't surprise her, seeing how close the two had become – and found she didn't mind.

She could really see that Georg appreciated how brave his children were trying to be, and the family had made the most of their last day together: lots of winter games outside, singing inside, and the meals had consisted of Georg's favorite dishes.

Now, it was pitch dark outside and the winds were strong, making strange noises in their howling. But somehow she heard when Georg came into their room and began changing for bed. Maria wiped away her tears and got out of the tub, trying not to think of how this would be their last night together until God knows when. And as she dried herself and changed into her winter nightgown, the same thought crossed her mind that had crossed her mind every night this month:

Now that you know you love your husband, will you do your wifely duty?

But tonight, like each night, she knew she couldn't bring herself to do that. Georg himself had made her promise he would not pressure her towards it, and that she would not ask for it until she was completely ready. And she didn't know if she was. And she knew what, if anything, was now holding her back.

I love him with all of my heart, and I want to be his, but I can't bring myself to give myself to him when he could never be mine.

So, after wiping the last tear off her face, Maria silently went into their bedroom.

But once she saw him, standing looking out the window, the debate between her mind and body ceased completely and her heart took over everything. All she could think was how much she loved him, and how much she would miss him. Her heart controlling her feet, Maria walked softly towards him, her chest burning. He didn't react to her presence but he must at least sense it. Wanting to cry again, Maria stopped right behind him, wrapped her arms around his torso and rested her head on his back.

When he felt moisture seep through his nightshirt, Georg slowly turned; his wife's hold did not loosen but her head stayed down. He cupped her face ever so gently and lifted her gaze to meet his.

Both had tears in their eyes, both of them had the word love burning in their chests, and both were trying to convince themselves to just let the word out.

But they couldn't – not verbally.

Neither one would ever be able to know or remember who initiated the kiss, but neither cared. One moment, they were looking at each other; the next, their mouths were pressed together in desperation. Before long their mouths opened, hungry for the taste of their partner, and hands roamed each others backs, hair, neck and face.

But when Georg found that his wife was pressed tightly between him and the wall, he stopped the kiss and looked at her. She let out a soft moan of complaint at the loss of contact but their fierce eye contact resumed.

Georg's tone seemed to work on its own. "Maria, I –"

But at that moment, the sound of two little running pairs of footsteps made Georg back away and both of them turn their attention to Gretl and Marta, who had just run into their room.

"Please can we stay in here with you?" asked a teary Gretl, clutching her stuffed bear.

"Please, the wind is so loud and makes such scary noises!" said Marta clutching her pink blanket.

Both parents' hearts melted, and knew they would be evil to refuse. "Of course, darlings, climb up with us."

But Maria found she could not sleep just yet. There was a word still burning in her chest. So, once she made sure Georg and the little ones were fast asleep, she sneaked out of bed, into the living room, went to the desk, pulled out a pen and paper, and began to write.


As usual, Georg and Marta woke before Maria and Gretl. Maria woke to soft sounds of crying and soothing from the other side of the room. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, seeing Georg, fully dressed to go, sitting in a chair by the window, reassuring and soothing Marta, who was clinging to him. Maria gave a soft smile while pressing back her own tears, and got out of bed. Feeling herself alone in the big bed, Gretl then woke up and followed her mother towards her father and big sister.

"What time is it?" asked Maria.

Georg sighed. "Six o'clock. I have to go now – my train leaves in an hour."

Maria bit her lip and nodded. As Gretl went to hug her father, Maria put on her robe.

But when the four of them went into the adjoining sitting room, there was a surprise waiting for them: the five oldest children were all just waking up from sleeping, some on the sofas and some on the floor.

"Oh," Georg murmured. "My children…"

All were fully awake now and stood up. "It was Louisa's idea," said Brigitta softly. "We just wanted to see you off."

Wordlessly, Georg opened his arms, and he hugged each of his children good-bye, lingering as long as he could. There was no need for words; he'd said his love and asked their promises to help their mother last night.

"It's time for me to go, children," he said, offering them as best a smile as he could. "Remember all I've told you; remember I love you so much."

All seven children said some form of goodbye in shaky and teary voices. Georg took a deep breath, took his suitcase in one hand and Maria's hand in the other, and led her out their rooms.

After asking the children to go to their rooms where they could watch him ride away, Georg led Maria to the staircase. Once they were alone, Georg took out his fine gold watch and pressed it into her hands. "This was my grandfather's; I'll have no use for it where I'm going. Keep it for me, will you?"

Maria nodded. She put the watch in the pocket of her robe and pulled out something of her own. "I have something for you too." She held it up for him to see. "It's a medal of Michael, the archangel. My father received it for his Confirmation. I want you to wear it for me."

He fingered the delicate silver medal on the strong, silver chain and smiled. "Put in on me."

Maria reached up and pulled it down around his head. Her hands were then captured by his and were held to his heart.

"Remember your promise," she whispered, her eyes burning, taking in every detail of his face.

His eyes did the same. "And you remember yours."

Georg leaned over and kissed her lips; while this kiss lingered, he kept it from having the passion last night's kisses had, knowing if he gave into it, he'd never leave.

He left as soon as their lips parted to avoid temptation, and Maria watched through blurred vision as he walked down the stairs and out the front door. Then she joined their crying children to watch him drive away.


Later that day, Georg sat in his seat on the train traveling through Germany, anger and sadness coursing through his veins. He would need all of Maria's and the children's prayers now, to keep up his façade as a loyal soldier. He hated that he had to do it, but then he thought of Maria and his children, and the future he could provide for them soon.

It would all be worth it.

As he adjusted himself in his seat, Georg heard a crumple of paper in his inner jacket pocket. Confused, Georg pulled it out and wondered what he could have left in there. But when he unfolded the unfamiliar piece of paper, he realized he never could have expected this:

Dear Georg,

I'm writing this now as you and the little ones sleep. I won't be able to sleep until I can get all I need to say out, even though I'm afraid of how you will react. This just shows how scared I am that I'm telling you this in a way that I will not see your initial, true reaction, for fear of disappointment.

I love you, Georg. I haven't always; this has come on so gradually it frightens me. It wasn't until you pulled away from me at the New Year's Ball that I realized how in love with you I am, and I know now that, just as I have completely forgiven you, I will always love you.

Believe me, I know this must surprise you, and you probably won't be happy about it, because I can accept the fact that you can't love me back. I know how much you loved Agathe, how all-consuming it was. I'm not so foolish to know that you could never feel something so powerful again, especially for someone like me, wife or no wife.

But I'm a selfish young woman, and I just have to tell you in some way or I'll go mad, especially because I don't know when I will see you again. I am holding you to your promise, and will think and pray for you every moment of the day and night.

If this message gives you nothing else, just let it tell you that there is someone in this world who loves you more than she ever thought she could love any single person. Even if you can't return the favor, it's still nice to know someone feels for you like that.

Be safe, and write as often as you can. We'll never stop thinking about you.

All of my love,

Maria

Georg's vision suddenly became very blurred and he let the hot tears fall, but not on the letter. This precious letter…Oh, God! Why hadn't he discovered this letter before he left? He could have told her to her face that of course he returned her feelings, feelings he could hardly have hoped for from her.

Oh, what he wouldn't give to just run back or turn back time. But, knowing he couldn't, he covered his eyes and let his tears out silently.

But soon he gathered his strength, and folded the letter more precious than gold to him, and put it in the pocket closest to his heart, where it would always be as long as he was away. The medal and this letter were his talismans, the strongest protections and motivations he could have: symbols of her love. He would come back; he would come back and once he did, he would tell her and show her just how much he returned her feelings.

And he found further comfort in remembering what he had left behind for her to find that night.

Hold on, my love, hold on…


Maria put off going to bed as long as she could. But, while sleeping in the large bed without Georg would take a long time to get used to, she would rather sleep nowhere else than in the room they shared, where she could most clearly remember his presence.

Not feeling drowsy just yet, Maria settled into bed and decided to try and distract herself with her current book. But once she opened the volume, a folded piece of paper fell out from between the pages. Confused, Maria put down the book and unfolded the paper.

What she found was something she never expected:

Dear Maria,

I am a coward. I'm glad I can write this down without you to dispute it, for it is the truth. The fact that I must join these monster's ranks – even if temporarily – is proof enough of that, but not even that disgusts me as much as the other reason I am a coward.

The other reason is this: I am resorting to the written word to tell you something I have felt from the moment I met you: I love you. With all of my heart I've fallen in love with you.

While it took me a while to find out, I know now I began to love you from the moment you came to my house. Before I met you, I never thought I could love someone so much again, after all I went through with Agathe. But I realize now that when she died, who I once was died, and it was you who brought me back to life and reformed my heart for yourself. I am yours, completely and totally.

I could never ask as much of you – forget that love cannot be bought or asked for, but after everything I put you through, just your forgiveness alone was something I could barely hope for.

I will be thinking of you every moment of the day and night that I am away from you, and please try to find comfort in the fact that there is someone who loves you in the world.

I will keep my promise to you, and will return. I will write as soon as I can, and always remember that our letters we send are susceptible to being checked.

Completely yours,

Georg

"Oh, God…" she gasped, the letter dropping from her hands and she began to cry in happiness and sorrow. He loved her, he loved her, he loved her!...and he was gone, and she didn't know when she would see him again. Oh, why didn't I tell him to his face when I had the chance!

So she cried her heart out on her pillow. When all of her tears had dried up, Maria found hope at the bottom of Pandora's box: He'll find your letter, and know the truth.

Finding new strength and hope, Maria wiped her face and folded the letter back up, placing it on the side table besides his watch. She would carry them with her always until he came home, where he belonged.

Come back, my love, come back…


A/N: I know, I know, this is harsh, but it's how the story goes. I have no idea when I'll be next able to update, so just be patient with me, okay? Reviews are my bread and butter.