A Time of Letters
The twenty-ninth day of January had heavy clouds in the sky that promised a new sprinkling of snow for Salzburg, the first one since Georg had left exactly two weeks ago. And there had been no letters in those long two weeks. Maria thought she would go mad with worry if a letter did not come soon.
Around five o'clock, just before it started to get dark, she and Max drove into the gateway, and, with Max's instructions, she pulled into the garage and shut the ignition off.
"Very good!" said Max, clapping his hands. "You did beautifully, my dear! I swear, there must be something wrong with you that you are able to do everything so naturally."
Maria let out a relieved laugh. "Max, I would have crashed into every tree if you hadn't been instructing me. I just hope I won't always be so nervous behind the wheel; it's just as scary as I thought it would be, if not more so."
"Believe me: you get used to it with practice. I did, and if I can, anyone can."
Maria laughed and thanked him. Bundled up in their winter things, they headed back towards the villa. Once again, Maria felt extremely grateful for Max's presence. He was a wonder with the children and knew just how to make her laugh during this worrying time. While she could not forget that Georg was not there, Max at least helped make her world without him a little bit brighter for her and the children. They would all be sad when he went back to Vienna in a few days, but Philomena's presence would be just as wonderful, she knew.
A few minutes later, while Maria and Max were reading in the drawing room, they heard the ecstatic shouting of their names in the voice of Brigitta in the front hall. Immediately alert, both put down their reading materials and rushed into the front hall.
And there was Brigitta, her face red from running and the cold weather she had just been outside in. A huge smile was on her face, and she waved a thick white envelope enthusiastically as she exclaimed with joy, "It's from Father! It's from Father!"
Those three words were enough for a radiant smile to spread across Maria face, and for her eyes to sparkle like sapphires in the sun. The sun seemed to rest in her face, she shined so bright. Maria gave an exclamation of joy and the two females embraced. Max watched with a smile and a sigh of relief. He himself had begun to worry with the lack of letters for two weeks.
"Let's open it now, Mother! Please?" begged Brigitta as soon as the hug ended.
Though Maria was over the moon herself, she somehow managed to hang on to her parental good sense. "Now, let's all calm down for a minute," she said, calming herself down. "Marta and Gretl are at a birthday party right now, and they would be really upset if we opened the letter without them here. They miss him just as much as we do. Don't you think we ought to wait until they're home?"
Brigitta's face fell a little and nodded. "You're right. Well, when will you bring them home, Uncle Max?" she asked her uncle eagerly.
Max pulled out his pocket watch and took in the time. "Oh! In just a few minutes, and we'll be back just in time for dinner."
"Very good," said Maria, taking the precious envelope from Brigitta. "Well, I'll just hold onto this until after dinner. Then we'll all read it together, and no 'buts' about it."
Brigitta immediately closed her mouth and sighed in defeat. With that, she immediately went up the stairs to inform her siblings about the exciting news.
Maria looked at and read the envelope in her hands, addressed to "The Family Von Trapp." Tears filled her eyes and she held the letter to her heart. She closed her eyes and happy tears spilled out.
She only opened them when she felt a hand squeezing her shoulder, and she turned her head to see Max giving her a smile. "I'm going to go get Marta and Gretl. I take it you won't let that envelope out of your sight?"
Maria smiled and nodded.
"And they're off!" cried Max in surprise. The moment Maria had concluded the prayer, all seven children had begun to devour their dinners as if their life depended on them finishing within five minutes.
Maria laughed heartily and waved her hands to get the children's attention. "Children, children, slow down! I have the letter right here and it's not going anywhere!"
"We just want to hear what Father wrote soon, Mother," said Gretl beside her, her little mouth full of mashed potatoes.
"Well," said Maria, wiping Gretl's face with her napkin, "I can tell you what your father would tell you all right now: stop eating like starving animals or you will all have horrible tummy-aches that will keep you up all night." She looked pointedly at each child. "I mean it. Let's eat at a reasonable pace with at least a resemblance of manners, all right?"
All of the children nodded and resumed eating, slowed down but quicker than they normally did. Maria couldn't blame them; she too ate with a little more urgency. There was no conversation, even from Max; everyone just wanted to finish their meals quickly so they could find out what was in the letter.
Finally, everyone was finished, and Maria led them all into the cozy drawing room. All of the children crowded around her, both on the sofa and the floor; Max stood off to the side respectively.
Maria opened the envelope carefully and pulled out the letter. She read it out loud:
My Dearest Family,
I am well and safe. I'm sorry I was not able to write to you sooner, but I've been moving around so much that I didn't want to write until I was in a more stable place, which I am now. I am on a ship in the Mediterranean Sea, undergoing an eight-week training period to make sure we all are in top shape before embarking on any missions.
But I don't want to talk about that. I'd rather tell you all about this beautiful place I am…
With that, Maria read aloud the words Georg wrote to his family, about the beautiful Mediterranean Sea that was the color of a million aquamarines, and the places in Italy he and his men had passed through. He also addressed each of the children in good long paragraphs, asking about their lives and the events he'd missed or that were coming up.
…No words can say how much I miss all of you. I think of you every day, and pray for you every night; I hope you're doing the same for me. Try not to worry about me too much. I've promised your mother and now I promise you that I will come home to you.
All of my love,
Papa
By the time Maria had reached this ending, all of the children were smiling – a few of the girls had tears of happiness in their eyes. Max was smiling in satisfaction, watching the group of eight hug each other in relief and happiness.
Quite some time later, Maria settled into bed and reached for the envelope that held the letter. The letter she had read aloud to the children had been wonderful to read to the children, as well as to read herself. But one thing worried her: nothing in that letter addressed to her and the children gave any acknowledgement that he had found her letter. Now she began to worry – she couldn't let him keep thinking that he did not know of her own feelings while she knew his, she couldn't let him think his love was unrequited any longer. Oh, if only he were here! But that wasn't an option right now.
Just as Maria was deciding to let him know where her letter was in her reply, she pulled out the letter to read again and noticed something he had not seen before: there was smaller writing on the back of the first page of the letter, at the bottom of the page. Eagerly, she brought it closer to her eyes and read:
If you have not yet found my letter, open your copy of Paradise Lost. I never take your medal off and your letter is never off my person.
Maria breathed a great sigh of relief, and kissed the letter and envelope before placing it on the side-table. She then picked up Georg's gold watch and sank back on the bed, holding it to her heart, imagining she was holding his.
On the third of February, the start of recreation hour found Georg doing what he always did during recreation hour now: standing at the stern railing of the large battleship, his eyes appearing to look at the blue sky and tranquil sea, but in reality he looked at nothing there and his thoughts were miles away. He rarely talked to anyone, and if he did, it was only ever initiated by someone else. Though he kept up his façade of loyalty very well, it comforted him to know that he was not the only one who missed home and who was uncomfortable with Nazi ideology. But beyond that military loyalty that is essential in working together, Georg trusted no one.
"Mail call!" came the booming voice of the head sergeant from behind him. The other soldiers and officers – for most of them spent their recreation hour out here when the weather was fair – all perked up at that, hoping for a letter from home. Georg's attention was likewise alerted, for he hoped some reply to his letter would come soon, too. But he didn't turn around just yet, in case he would be disappointed.
"Von Trapp!"
Just like that, his heart filled and he turned around, completely alert. The sergeant was holding up, not just one, but a bundle of letters for him. A smile spread across his face as he made his way to the sergeant and took them gratefully. Once he had them, he headed back down to his bunk, not hearing one of the other soldiers say, "I never thought I'd see that man smile."
Thanks to his higher rank, Georg was given a cell of his own on the boat, though it was very tiny, with just a bunk, tiny desk, door to an even smaller bathroom and a porthole looking into the sea. He immediately closed the door behind him and sat on the edge of his tiny bed. He untied the string that bound the letters together and smiled wider as he looked at them all. Eight letters in various hands, ranging from five-year-old print to elegant cursive. Recognizing each handwriting, he organized them all from youngest to oldest and read in that order.
The smile never left his face as he read each of them, relishing in each of his children's news: Gretl's newest picture, Brigitta's new high grade, Louisa's new adventure…
But he saved the best for last, looking at the simple, pretty cursive of his wife. He opened this letter, and just the first two words were enough to lift his heart to new heights:
My Georg,
Words can't describe the happiness we all felt when Brigitta rushed into the house, waving your letter in her hand as if it were Shakespeare's First Folio. All of the children insisted on writing their own letters to you; they've made it their personal mission that you get the most mail of anybody on your boat. All that matters to me is that each of our letters gets to you.
The Mediterranean sounds so beautiful, Georg, and I can't tell you how jealous I am that you are in warm weather. It's a typical Austrian winter here, with plenty of snow and cold air, along with a blizzard or two that will send at least two of our children into our bedroom for the night. I must say, I don't mind at all.
Things here have been going as well as can be expected. The children are throwing themselves into school, which is good for them. I put on as brave a face for them as I can, but I think they know, especially Liesl, that I think of you just as much – if not more – as they do. I pass my time as best I can, and one way that's been helpful is I'm having the sisters at the abbey and also Father Norbert send me donated winter clothes that I can mend and fix before they're given to the poor. It's good hard work, and God's work at that, so it's helping.
Max has been a big help, and though he's got it in his head that the children should sing at the Salzburg Folk Festival this summer, I'm acting in your place and setting him in his each time he mentions it. He's also teaching me how to drive (and before you start saying anything, he's a very good teacher because I've never once come close to a crash). We'll miss him when he goes back to Vienna tomorrow, but I'm looking forward to seeing Philomena again; her company will be just as wonderful.
I'm glad you found my letter, and yes, I found your letter the night you left. We certainly are a pair, aren't we? What is that line of Benedick's from Much Ado About Nothing? "Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably." Pretty much covers it, huh?
It's hard sleeping in that huge bed alone. Lately I've taken to taking pillows and piling them up on your side and holding them at night, just so I can at least imagine you're there. Now I'm blushing, but at least you know I miss you a lot.
And you know I love you, and I know you love me. Your letter never leaves my sight, either, and neither does your watch.
We all hope to hear from you soon. I don't know how much free time you have down there, but at least now you have something to do with it.
Love,
Your Maria
"My Maria…" he whispered, his finger tracing those words and his heart filling with love. "Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably." Smiling, another line from his favorite Shakespearean comedy came to mind as he stared at her signature: "Love me! why, it must be requited." So many lines in this letter had made his heart soar
And he would, all the days of his life, especially now.
From that moment on, Georg never smiled at sea unless he had a letter in his hand, as the men would observe. It had heartened them somewhat to know that the man was not just a silent, efficient, strong block of stone, but had a heart just like any human. Georg spent his recreation and sometimes his time before sleep replying and writing to letters from his children, his friends and his wife. These letters were the strength he needed to keep up his façade.
"What are you doing to celebrate?" asked Maria as she talked to Dominik on the phone, in honor of his twenty-second birthday on the twenty-seventh of February.
"Nothing much. Some friends are taking me out to a few pubs where we'll most likely take over the entertainment, only this time, they insist that I just watch."
"That's not going to last long," said Maria with a smile. "You enter into a room with a piano, it's like watching metal race to magnets."
Dominik chuckled. "You know me only too well. And, by the way, tell all of the children thank you for the wonderful birthday cards I got in the mail this morning. Also, give Liesl the phone when you're done so I can thank her for the beautiful drawing she sent me."
"Of course."
"As for your gift, the jacket fits perfectly and is so elegant. Thank you so much."
"You deserve nothing but the best I can give you, Dom," said Maria warmly.
"How are you holding up, sister?" asked Dominik gently, after a comfortable pause.
Maria sighed and sat down in the telephone closet. "As well as can be expected, I suppose. It's so strange…I don't live day to day, but rather letter by letter. The children don't send their letters at the same times as each other and me, so nearly every day, a letter arrives from Georg for someone in the house, and I'm sure he's keeping in touch with Hans and Max as well. So nearly every day I'm reassured that he is all right."
"You're worried."
"Mmm…I know he'll keep his promise to come back to me, but…I just hope he doesn't get seriously hurt or…something else happens."
"Mm-hm. Have you told him of your feelings yet?"
To Dominik's surprise, Maria burst out laughing. Finally, she calmed down enough to explain how they'd told each other, and Dominik laughed too.
"Too wise to woo peaceably, indeed! Oh, Maria, I'm so happy for you both, and yet so sad! I know you won't admit it, but it must be hell for you two to be apart, especially now."
Maria gave a watery chuckle. "Hell is an unfair word for me. I have the children, Philomena, and you and Max in Vienna. I can't imagine how much harder it must be for Georg. I miss him terribly, but if I think about it, I feel I'll go mad. The only thing is just not think about it unless I'm reading one of his letters, and just dive into every task and work I have in front of me. Makes time go by quicker."
"I understand," said Dominik. "Well, I also wanted to tell you that my spring break is coming up, and, if I'm welcome, I can be there on the eighteenth for your birthday."
"Oh, Dominik, of course you're welcome!" exclaimed Maria, smiling. "It would be wonderful if you could come down, especially with Georg away. I won't deny I wish he could be here for that day, but that's just my selfish side."
"No, that's just your normal human side," said Dominik. "We'll make arrangements soon, all right?"
"Deal. I'll go get Liesl for you."
After the two women had exchanged the phone and their conversation had commenced, Dominik asked Liesl, "So, now that I know how you're doing, and it's not as if I don't trust my sister's word, but tell me how she is from your point of you."
Liesl smiled, knowing that Dominik would ask this question. "She's hanging in there, just like the rest of us. But I can see how happy she is when a letter of any kind comes from Father, and she carries his watch everywhere with her like a lifesaver. She misses him as much, if not more, than we do. I think she really loves him, Dom."
She could practically hear Dominik smile. "And when did you figure that out?"
"I suspected it first when we visited you in Vienna, when she told me how she'd forgiven Father for what he did to her. Then every time I saw them together after that only confirmed in my mind that they were in love. I'm glad I don't mind at all; I know my mother would have wanted Father to be happy. And Maria has been my mother from the first day I met her. You think they're in love too, don't you?"
"No, I know they are. All I can say is that they've told each other their feelings, and they're happy in the knowledge."
Liesl smiled and sighed in relief.
"Also, I should let you know that I'm coming to stay for a week in March, during my spring break."
Liesl's smile widened and exclaimed, "Wonderful! There's a new music shop in Salzburg that just opened up that I want to show you."
And with that, they began to make plans.
Time is certainly a strange thing. It seems to move so slowly in the present moment until you look back at the past and wonder how it went by so fast. Before Maria knew it, February had ended and March had began. The snows began to melt away, and Maria knew what she wanted to do once it was all gone.
A few days into March, Maria approached the gardener, Gerhard. "Would it be possible for me to have a bit of earth? I want a garden to plant flowers that I would work on with the children."
Gerhard, a quiet and hardworking man with silver-streaks in his brown hair, smiled and immediately helped her point out a good plot of land near the terrace. Maria smiled. "Perfect."
She then asked Gerhard where in town she might get seeds and gardening tools.
Only a few more days passed and the snow was all gone. The weather was warming up and the soil was thawing fast.
When Maria had told the children of her bit of earth, Marta and Louisa had been the ones to volunteer help. Louisa had no aversion to being dirty or hard work; Marta was eager to do something with her mother that would bring forth beautiful flowers.
So, in the cool yet warm sun of mid-March, the mother and two daughters were hard at work pulling out the weeds. All wore protective gloves, and occasionally Maria or Louisa would have to help Marta pull one from the ground, but the conversation was invigorating enough to make the hard work fun, along with the occasional song. The boys were playing a ball game nearby, Brigitta was helping Gretl with her homework, and Liesl and Dominik – who'd arrived in Salzburg yesterday – were in town at the music shop they'd wanted to explore. Philomena was taking an afternoon nap.
"One, two, THREE!" cried all three of them as the pulled the last ugly weed up from the ground and threw it on the big pile.
"Finally!" cried Louisa, throwing her arms in the air. "Now the fun can begin."
Maria chuckled and pulled over the basket that contained packets of seeds and spades. She handed one of those small shovels to Louisa. "Would you like to do the honors?"
Louisa took it from her with a smile. "Just point out where, Mother."
"What flowers did you get, Mother?" asked Marta enthusiastically.
"You'll see," said Maria. "I made up a little song that includes some of them."
"Sing it to me, please."
"Only if you help me plant the seeds, sweetheart."
And as Louisa dug the proper holes and Marta dropped in the seeds, Maria crooned:
Clusters of crocus,
Purple and gold
Blankets of pansies,
Out from the cold.
Lilies and iris,
Safe from the chill.
Safe in my garden,
Snowdrops so still.
"I like that, Mother," said Louisa, moving her long blond braid over her shoulder and wiping the sweat off the back of her neck. "It reminds me of one of my favorite books, The Secret Garden. You and Marta should read it together, you both would love it."
"Do you have a copy or does Brigitta have it?" asked Maria, glad to hear Louisa make a book recommendation for a change.
"It's in our room," said Louisa. "I'm sure Brigitta will know where it is buried." She ended on a chuckle.
"Mother, isn't your birthday coming up?" asked Marta, sprinkling in the last of the snowdrop seeds.
"Yes, in three days," replied Maria.
"What presents do you want?" asked Marta.
"Yes, we'd all like to know that," said Louisa with a smile.
Maria returned the smile and shook her head. "It doesn't matter to me what I receive. If I receive any presents this year, it will be the first birthday since I was Gretl's age that I have received any presents for my birthday."
Both girls looked scandalized. But before they could say anything, a cheery voice boomed over them.
"Well, look at you busy bees!" said Philomena, looking over the railing of the terrace to the three gardeners in their bit of earth. "What excellent progress you're making!"
"Thanks, Auntie Phil!" called Marta, waving.
"Could I borrow your mother for a moment? She has a telephone call."
"Sure, coming," said Maria. "Girls, fill up all of the wholes and then go wash up and change, all right?"
"All right, Mother," the girls replied.
Maria stood up and, brushing the dirt off her hands and apron, followed Philomena back into the house. "So, do you know who's calling?"
"It sounded like Hans Falk," replied Philomena. "See you for dinner!"
As Philomena went back up the stairs, Maria went into the telephone closet and picked up the receiver. "Hello?"
"Maria, this is Hans Falk. I hate to ask on such short notice, but could you come and see me? I've received a message from Georg that would like to talk to you about."
A/N: The little song I threw in is actually from the musical of "The Secret Garden." Get used to my updates being this slow, or possibly slower. The work is piling up and my time for writing is becoming more and more precious. Please review!
