Thanks again to CasaNova73099 for helping me out with this episode. Enjoy this chapter's tension.


Episode #22: Nine to Ed


We see a dark place cramped with bags and luggage, accompanied by the sound of it being inside a vehicle. We some hear faint mumbling under the bags. The mumbling grows louder...

"Ow! Move your tailbone, Jimmy." Sarah's voice mumbles from beneath the luggage.

"I'm trying, but I'm stuck." Jimmy mumbles in response. Kyle emerges from the luggage, activating a flashlight to look around. He is wearing his swim-shorts instead of his normal shorts, and has sunglasses set back above his eyes. Jimmy and Sarah emerge soon afterwards, both gasping for breath. Sarah is wearing her swimsuit along with her usual jeans, while Jimmy wears a turquoise tanktop and khaki shorts. All have their normal footwear, and are carrying backpacks.

"Zoe?... Zoey, where are ya?" Kyle asks as he looks around for Zoe with his flashlight, and Sarah remarks "Yeah, she convinces us to follow her, then she disappears before we even get to the park."

"Look over here!" Zoe's voice calls, and Kyle follows her voice to point his flashlight at her. Zoe is wearing her usual black leggings, green sandals, and a bikini top with beach balls for breasts and butt cheeks! She exclaims while showing off: "I just grew my cups n curves! You like em, boys? Heeheeheeheehee!"

Jimmy sweats while Kyle chuckles, bites his bottom lip and puts on his sunglasses! Sarah, however, is not pleased.

"You put that bikini top back, Zoe." she scolds. "And stop actin like a little horn dog."

"Heh, you're just jealous cuz you're a late bloomer!" Zoe disses Sarah before diving back into the luggage. She re-emerges wearing her own green bikini top, and she has several comics. "I wonder what Ed reads in these!... Oooo, Ravenous Rex Issue #35!"

"Zoe, I suggest you put those back." Jimmy fearfully warns.

"Relax!" Zoe replies. "As long as the bus is movin, we're in the clear!"

The bus they are in hits a bump in the road, making them fall over. It's revealed that the four kids are inside the cargo hold of a coach bus that's exiting a highway and going into the urban streets of downtown Orange Harbor.

In the bus's passenger compartment, we see the Peach Creek High seniors. Ed sits with May, Double-D sits with Eddy, Nazz sits with Jenna, Kevin sits with Jonny, Rolf sits with Paul, Lee sits with Marie, and Rachel sits with Sean. Each boy is wearing their swim-pants instead of their usual pants, Ed & Double-D are respectively wearing gray & red tanktops, and Eddy is wearing a colorful Aloha shirt that's partly undone. The girls are wearing their bikini tops (or one-pieces in Lee's and Rachel's cases) instead of their shirts. Nazz, Jenna and Marie are also wearing their hoodies, which are open, and Rachel has white sneakers & black socks instead of her usual boots & net stockings.

Kevin looks back and sees Jenna snoozing off, so he takes out his camera.

"Shh shh, here's the rest of it!" Kevin shows a video to Eddy, Jonny, Paul and Rolf.

Video: Kevin fast-forwards through several clips of him recording his Senior Skip time with Jenna, which include Jenna (wearing a yellow sundress and shades) driving Kevin to Pomelo Beach, Kevin tickling Jenna while wearing their swim-suits (plus Jenna's unzipped Daisy Dukes) at the beach, eating ice-cream from the beach's ice-cream stand, and wearing bathrobes as they watch the sunset together from the porch of the beachside cottage they were staying at. Kevin ceases the fast-forward and continues from where he presumably left off: Kevin, still wearing his bathrobe, is setting his cam in a hidden corner in the cottage's bedroom, getting it into place right before Jenna struts in.

"Hey, Kevvie!" Jenna greets seductively. Kevin turns around, and sees Jenna seductively open up her bathrobe and drop it to the floor to reveal her white bra & panties, and she gives Kevin a "come here" finger as she approaches him. Kevin promptly walks towards her as well, and she removes his robe to reveal his boxers, then they grab each other and jump into bed!

"Geeheeheehehehehahaha!" Eddy, Jonny, Paul and Rolf giggle and laugh as they watch Kevin and Jenna make out in bed. Both giggle as they kiss and caress each other in bed. Nazz sees it too, and she starts giggling uncontrollably, waking Jenna up.

"What's going on?" Jenna groggily asks, and Nazz points to Kevin's video. Kevin fast-forwards again: "Here's after I talked to Eddy online. This is where we really got it on!"

"WHAT THE FUCK?" Jenna makes a jump at Kevin, but Nazz quickly holds her back and Kevin stops the video. Jenna yells at Kevin: "YOU FUCKIN RECORDED THAT? I WANTED THAT MOMENT TO BE BETWEEN JUST THE TWO OF US!"

"So Jenn, how does it feel to lose your virginity?" Eddy asks, and everyone on the bus hears it! Jenna gets even angrier, and answers: "It feels like THIS!"

Jenna tries punching Eddy, but Eddy blocks with his arms, entertaining the others on the bus. Eddy asks "Damn, you punch hard, Jenn! You and Kev got it on THAT hard?"

"[SHUT UP!]" Jenna tries getting at Eddy, but Nazz restrains her again with Double-D's help while Eddy, Kevin, Jonny, Paul, Rolf, Ed and the Kankers laugh.

"My boy just doesn't know when to stop!" Lee laughingly comments.

"Ok ok Jenn, I'll delete it later." Kevin puts away his cam in his pocket, and Jenna replies "No, I wanna see you delete it right now if you really care about my feelings."

"Fine." Kevin takes out his camera and deletes the video, much to the other boys' disappointment, Rolf less so. But Paul lightens up:

"Yo CK and Baby Bonita, did ya name yo kid yet?" Paul asks, and Jenna glares at him.

"It was safe sex, dude." Kevin answers.

"Double-D, did you and Marie use condoms when you laid each other in Jimbo's house last week?" Eddy asks Double-D, who answers with slight discomfort: "I don't think we went that far, because I remember us still wearing our undergarments."

"You still loved it!" Marie teases from her seat. Ed, meanwhile, continues stroking May's hair when she looks through their window.

"Hey, there it is!" May points at the Mondo-A-GoGo theme park, and everyone (except the goths) go "WHOOO!" as the bus enters the park. Once the bus parks, the seniors pour out of the bus in joy. Sarah, Jimmy, Kyle and Zoe hear them coming to get their bags.

"Back to Ed's bag!" Zoe shouts, and they cram back into Ed's bag just as the cargo hold opens and the seniors collect their bags.

"HERE WE ARE AT MONDO, PLANK, AND WE'RE GO-GO-GOIN ON EVERY RIDE!" Jonny exclaims. "WHO'S WITH US?"

"YEEEAAAHHH!" Ed, Eddy, Kevin, Rolf and Paul run off with Jonny while Double-D, the Kankers, Nazz, Jenna, Rachel and the goths take their time. As Ed runs through the park with his friends, Zoe, Kyle, Jimmy and Sarah take the opportunity to leap out of his bag while he isn't looking. Zoe is also revealed to have a backpack like her friends.

"THIS IS IT!" Zoe exclaims with her arms spread. "MOST WICKED-A-GOGO! CRAZY RIDES AND THRILLING THRILLS GALORE! IT'S MAKIN ME TINGLE, HAHAHAHAHA! COME ON, JIM JIM!"

"Wait, AH!" Jimmy panics as Zoe takes him to go on rides.


The Eds, Kevin, Jonny, Rolf, Paul, Marie, Lee and Rachel throw their arms up as they ride down the big drop of the wooden "MANEATER" coaster.

Meanwhile, Sarah, Jimmy, Kyle and Zoe ride "POINT FREEFALL," a drop-tower ride resembling a lighthouse. As they drop down, Jimmy SCREAMS!

Ed & May and Jonny & Nazz get drenched as they SPLASH down a sawmill ride, followed by the other two Eds & Kankers, and then the goths.

Sarah and Kyle are riding in one of the gondolas of an Enterprise ride while Zoe excitedly hangs onto the gondola's top by one of the side-bars, holding the SCREAMING Jimmy with her other arm!

The Eds, Kankers, Kevin, Jenna, Rolf, Paul and Jonny & Plank are spun around in a rotor ride called the "WATERSPOUT" while Nazz and the goths watch from the viewing platform. Those being spun around scream "WHOOOAAAAA!" and "AAAAAAHHHH!"

Sarah, Jimmy, Kyle and Zoe ride the inverted "MIGHTY MANTA" coaster, taking the four front seats and holding hands as they ride. Jimmy once again SCREAMS, but Zoe merely responds "I'M HAVIN FUN, TOO!"


Some time later, the teens hit Mondo-A-GoGo's beach, accessed from a boardwalk behind the "BLUE LAGOON" waterpark area. All the boys except the goth boys and Plank are swimming, while all the girls removed their pants (and hoodies in Nazz's, Jenna's and Marie's cases) to either swim with the boys (the Kankers) or lay on their towels (the remaining girls, though Nazz appears to be drying herself off). Numerous seagulls fly around, one landing to approach Jenna. Jenna lifts her shades and flips off the bird, making it fly away.

"Damn, look at them go." Rachel points at those swimming in the water as Sean applies sunscreen to her back. Rolf picks up Jonny from below, shouts "HAIRLESS OTTER," and throws him across the water, while Eddy, Ed, Kevin and Paul grab Lee's arms & legs to toss her waayyy up and back down into the water. Sean points in another direction:

"Look at that!" Sean is pointing at one of the water slides overlooking the beach, where there is a towering SPLASH at the bottom that sends a water-tube flying up and it crash-lands between Nazz & Jenna, making them scramble back!

"What was that?" Double-D asks, and Marie suggests "Let's check it out."

They and the other swimmers swim back to shore to check out the crashed tube. The drenched Zoe, now wearing only her bikini, flips the tube off of her and reveals herself: "WHOO, THAT WAS A HOOT!"

"ZOE?" Nazz asks in surprise as Sarah and Kyle, also wearing only their swim-suits, rush down from the pier and towards Zoe. Kyle asks "You two ok?"

Jimmy's hair curls are seen sticking out of the sand, and Zoe grabs them to pull Jimmy out.

"Oh way to go, Zoe!" Sarah sarcastically says. "Now they know we're here thanks to your little water slide stunt."

"So? You're the one who wanted to come along, Sarah!" Zoe retaliates.

"How did you four get here?" Double-D asks, and Eddy adds "Yeah, since when did you become seniors?"

"We stowed away in Ed's bag!" Zoe answers. "It was my idea because I love love LOVE this place. Sarah and Kyle followed, and I brought Jim Jim because I love love loooove him!"

Zoe puckers at Jimmy, making him nervously hide behind Sarah, who explains "The park's staff were stupid enough not to recognize us as kids."

"The dudes even called us midgets!" Kyle laughs.

"Ok, let's go back to the Lagoon and ride that wicked new Whirlpool slide!" Zoe suggests excitedly.

"Yeah, that sounds good! What do you say, guys?" Kevin asks.

"YEAH!" all the boys except the goth boys agree. But when Ed sees that May isn't coming with him, he looks back and asks "May, are you comin?"

"Nah, I wanna tan a little bit." May answers, laying on her stomach and tanning with the other girls. Jenna and Nazz agree: "Ditto."

"Oh come on, you three barely went on any rides with us so far." Jonny complains at Nazz, Jenna and May.

"We'll ride with you guys later." Nazz replies.

"I bet." Eddy sarcastically scoffs. "And you, Lee. You were babblin all about that new slide when we were on the bus, and now you don't even seem to care."

"I do! I just wanna tan first." Lee replies, and her sisters bob in agreement.

"Plank says you bitches are no fun!" Jonny tells the girls, but Kevin dismisses them: "Forget the chicks. They're just scared!"

"... Excuse me?" Jenna lifts her head up, and Kevin starts fluttering his arms and making chicken noises!

"Yeah that's right! All these rides and freak shows are too much for you queasy girls!" Eddy cracks, and the boys, including Kyle, start chuckling.

"Yeah, this whole park's too manly for ya'll!" Paul jokes too, angering the girls, especially Jenna and Marie.

"Ahem, Lee and I rode ALL the rides with you boys." Marie retaliates, backed up by Rachel who stands up: "And we watched that Man-Crab show with you guys as well."

The other teen girls stand up with Rachel. Sean warns his fellow goth boys: "Let's back up, boys. Female pride is coming in."

Sarah and Zoe join the teen girls, and Sarah shouts: "And at least we girls got BRAINS! All you boys are nothin but BRAWN!"

Kyle gasps at this, and Eddy & Kevin shout "WHAT?"

"BOYS GO TO JUPITER TO GET MORE STUPIDER!" Sarah, Zoe, May and Marie chant while dancing, then Nazz, Jenna, Lee and Rachel continue: "GIRLS GO TO COLLEGE TO GET MORE KNOWLEDGE!"

"Sheer blasphemy!" Double-D retorts at the girls. "I, a male, happen to be the class valedictorian, a member of the student council, and president of the chess club. Thank you very much!"

"You're practically a girl, you fuckin walking-stick! Stop actin all high-n-mighty!" Jenna puts down Double-D, and the other girls (even Marie) laugh!

"Speakin of high-n-mighty, the rest of you guys ain't much more than a bunch of couch-potatoes!" Lee cracks, angering the boys.

"YEAH BOYS, HOW ABOUT MAKIN US SOME SANDWICHES FOR A CHANGE!" Zoe shouts, and the girls laugh hysterically while the boys anger even more!

"ROLF HAS HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR CHAUVINISM, WOMEN!" Rolf rolls up his arms and starts stomping towards the girls, but Kevin stops him by putting his arm in front.

"I know how to settle this!" Kevin says with a smile. "Let's have a battle of the sexes!"

"You're on, assholes!" Jenna accepts. "First team to score three points wins! And if we win, I'll be namin our first child, Kevo!"

"So be it." Kevin complies, but Ed brings up "But there's nine boys to eight girls."

"I say we weed out Slim Jim." Paul suggests. "If there's any boy here more girly than DD, it's Slim Jim fo sho."

"Yeah, he and Plank will be our scorekeepers." Jonny assigns, but Jimmy seems upset. Double-D approaches Jimmy to comfort him.

"It's ok, Double-D. The circumstances are understandable." Jimmy reluctantly resigns himself to the role of scorekeeper.

"So it's settled! Eight dudes versus eight babes!" Eddy declares, grabbing a stick to write in the sand: "Here's how it'll go down..."

To be Continued...


Trivia: The Ravenous Rex issue Zoe found in Ed's bag is a throwback to my older Teen Series episode "From Ed to Eternity," and Rolf's "HAIRLESS OTTER" line reflects back to Season 2's "Hands Across Ed." Zoe's "THAT WAS A HOOT!" line is a reference to the show "Rocko's Modern Life" as Heffer's catchphrase, and Mondo-A-GoGo's "Mighty Manta" coaster is based on the actual Manta coaster in SeaWorld Orlando.

The title of this episode is based on the movie "Nine to Five," in which three women try to get even with and overthrow their "sexist" boss, so you could also say that it loosely inspired this episode.