One day I may be able to tell Neji my past. If I don't then Gaara may come up to me one day and talk then I'll be forced to explain everything. I don't want it to be that way. Neji and I are beginning to act like the perfect couple that everyone wants to have. I can't just let this go when I may finally be happy.
I left work and hopped into his car debating on whether or not I should tell him. If I do he may leave thinking I'll leave first anyway. It's not like I leave whenever things get bad or too good… I just leave whenever I need to.
Very few people are able to figure out my movements. Even then they tend to get lost for a year or two until they realize I'm a hundred steps ahead of them. Poor kids but those are the people from my past… the really far back ones… like Kiba, Shino, Kabuto, and more.
I smiled at the Neji and tried to think of a good way to explain that I'm a runner. I just run away when the going gets tough. That's the way I've always been. Somehow Sasori has always been there as well. I finally got to know his name last time around… I wonder when he'll show up here and save me if I need it.
I sighed and thought about other things I could do. That list was very short. I turned to Neji to see him smiling looking peaceful and relaxed. I looked at him for a moment longer then sighed. I guess I should tell him.
"Neji… you know how you always wanted me to tell you about my past?" I asked as he went through wendy's drive through in order to get us milkshakes. I got vanilla and he ordered chocolate. When we got to the window I almost gasped aloud when I saw Sasori.
He smirked at me and handed Neji our drinks before wishing us a good day. I glared at him and looked away beginning to lose my nerve. That's just what Sasori does to me. He makes me remember every time. Because somehow he was always there at the end of it with open arms. I glared out the window and slurped at my drink not really tasting it at all.
"Is something wrong?" Neji asked making me turn on the Mindless Self Indulgence cd in his car then tell him everything. I Started with the fact that I always leave, and then ending with the fact that I don't know if I'll leave this life or not. I don't know why I suddenly told him everything.
He didn't blink once when he found out. I wonder if that's making me feel so disappointed or if it's the fact that I'm not so sure if he even cares. Neji being apathetic to my past could probably be even worse. I sighed to myself when he said nothing and began to get out of the car when we stopped at a red light but he just locked the doors.
"How many people have you dated?" He asked coldly. I turned to him and closed my eyes thinking back. I guess this is only fair. He thought he was going out with a sweet and innocent oddball but it turns out he's going out with a girl who has a tendency to run away from her life and starting over. That's gotta be worse than dating some slut.
"About twelve." I answered honestly and got out then called a cab. It's going to kill my wallet but I need to give him some space. This may be it between us… it's kind of stupid when you think about it but I guess that doesn't matter. Neji is rich and can get any girl he wants whenever he wants her. I should be grateful he looked in my direction instead of pining after him.
Before I could finish calling my favorite cab company Sasori pulled up beside me and rolled down his window. I looked at him oddly for a moment then smiled softly. "I thought you were working." I said playfully.
"I quit." He answered and opened the door. I hopped in and he drove me home. I let him do so knowing full well that he just wants to be there for me. Sasori doesn't care what he has to put up with as long as he gets the most time with the girl. I figured this out about five times around then I forgot constantly until I began to look for him each time I started a new life… then one day he wasn't there.
Five of the thirteen lives I've lived… Sasori wasn't there.
I'm happy this isn't one of them.
