I was gonna wait to update until this made it into the liley community, since I want everyone to be able to see it. I guess you're all lucky I felt generous today ;)
Chapter 2
Lilly sat back in her spot by Miley's side, feeling more and more like they were trapped without chance of being saved. She'd made the short trek between her hole in the rubble and Miley's side every 15 to 30 minutes to blow the emergency whistle in hopes of someone finding them. She'd had no luck so far and a glance at her watch told her they had been trapped for almost ten hours. It seemed impossible to her, that not only had no one bothered to look for them in here, but also that they hadn't killed each other being stuck in a small space together. It was certainly more time than they'd spent together in months.
"Miley?" said Lilly softly, but got no response. Feeling a bit of panic she moved closer and shone the flashlight at Miley. Lilly had no way of knowing whether Miley was merely trapped with some minor injuries or whether the heavy concrete beam had crushed her legs and she was possibly dying right before Lilly's eyes. No matter the anger and hurt between them, Lilly did not want Miley to die.
Lilly hadn't really taken the time to look at Miley since the earthquake, maybe because she just couldn't stand seeing her in pain, or so angry. A sheen of dust covered Miley's face, along with some smears of blood from cuts and scrapes and the tear tracks were still clearly visible. Lilly felt the sudden urge to trail her fingers along her wife's cheek, but stopped herself at the last moment. Instead, she reached for her bag, and grabbed some of the baby wipes inside. She hesitated again, but scolded herself for being afraid to touch her own wife, and gently cleaned the dirt off Miley's face. Miley blinked her eyes open before too long, looking at her weirdly.
"What're you doing?"
Lilly stopped, feeling like she'd gotten caught doing something bad, and shrugged, "I just thought I'd make you presentable again."
"Who's gonna see me down here?" asked Miley, watching Lilly intently.
"I am."
Miley frowned, as if lost in thought for a minute, before asking in a soft voice, "Is that why?"
Lilly narrowed her eyes in confusion, "Why what?"
"Why you stopped loving me…because you don't find me attractive."
Lilly felt the words like a punch to the gut and couldn't find words to say. Never, through everything that had happened, had she ever thought there was anyone more beautiful than Miley. Never once had she stopping loving the girl she married. She shook her head.
"I never stopped loving you, Miles."
Miley sniffed, her tears once again in full force, "Then why?"
Lilly sighed, "Let's just…let's get out of here first and then…"
"Then you'll just forget about me again…and go back to Mikayla," said Miley, voice quivering.
Lilly clenched her jaw at the accusation, but for once it wasn't snide or bitter, only full of hurt and she couldn't stand the fact she had done this. She sighed again, more heavily this time, "Miley…"
Lilly had no idea what to say and remained silent, while Miley covered her face with her hands and cried. Unable to watch the girl she still loved like that, Lilly got up to return to her hole, determined to call the help that would get them out of there.
xxx
She was on a boat, swaying back and forth in the turbulent water, wishing she could just reach dry land and stop the incessant movement. Lilly awoke with a start to the all too familiar rumbling and shaking, the cascade of more debris raining down on them and the crunching of the cars and pillars as they shifted. Without a second thought, Lilly threw her body across Miley's, shielding the girl from the falling debris. Small rocks and dirt rained against her back and the flashlight rolled off the beam to drop to the ground somewhere.
The shaking lasted for what seemed like forever. As soon as it stopped, Lilly sat up, spilling dust and rubble everywhere. She blindly searched the ground for their flashlight and almost shouted in triumph when she found it. She cranked the little handle rapidly, until the light turned back on. Lilly felt Miley's fingers gripping her shirt and looked down. Miley was giving her an odd look.
"Did you just…protect me?"
Lilly frowned, realizing what she had done in the spur of the moment, and shrugged, "I don't know what I was thinking. I'm gonna go check the hole."
She moved to get away, but Miley did not release her hold on Lilly's shirt. "Lils, I'm hungry."
Lilly stopped short at the nickname, too shocked to make a snide comment about not being Miley's maid. Miley hadn't called her that in a long time. She reached for her survival bag and pulled out one of the small food bars to hand to Miley. The girl looked at it in disgust and Lilly actually managed a weak chuckle.
"Enjoy breakfast, honey!" said Lilly sarcastically, though for once it almost felt right to be calling Miley some silly pet name. Miley made a face at her, but it seemed almost jovial and Lilly quickly moved to get away before they remembered they hated each other.
The most recent aftershock had shifted the pile of rubble significantly and Lilly felt she might almost be able to squeeze through the hole with a bit of work. She shifted aside some more of the rocks and tried to see if she could fit, but it was still too small for her shoulders to clear. Frustrated, Lilly took out her whistle again and got as close to the hole as she could, before blowing it. There was no answer from the outside and Lilly sat back against the rubble, feeling tears of frustration pool in her eyes. She pulled out her cell phone, hoping to maybe get a signal this close to freedom, but her battery had died overnight and she threw it angrily into the darkness. She heard it shatter and only briefly felt guilty over destroying her possession.
"Lilly?" called Miley, sounding almost worried after hearing the phone shatter and Lilly pushed off the pile with a sigh to make her way back over.
"Still nothing," said Lilly heavily as she sat back in her spot. She'd thought about telling Miley help was on the way, but it would be of little use – Miley could always tell when she was lying.
"Do you think anyone's noticed we're missing, yet?" asked Miley, the bad situation making her amicable enough to hold a conversation.
Lilly shrugged, thinking about their friends and family on the outside. With the magnitude earthquake they must have had to bring down this garage, Lilly wasn't sure others they cared about weren't in a bind, as well. She wouldn't mention this, however. "Hard to say, I'm sure all the phone lines are down and the roads probably blocked. But I'm sure your dad is worried, you are his little girl after all."
"You don't think Mikayla's wondering where you are?" asked Miley and though there was a hint of bitterness in her voice, it actually sounded like a sincere question.
Lilly rolled her eyes in frustration, "Miley, I don't want to talk about Mikayla."
"You don't wanna talk about anything, Lilly. You haven't in a long time. What's so special about Mikayla that you had to spend every waking moment with her and forget about your wife?"
"I think you're forgetting who started spending more and more time away from home. You were never there, Miley! I hung out with Mikayla because I was bored and lonely!"
"So you cheated on me because you were bored and lonely?" said Miley, voice full of bitterness and hurt again.
Lilly huffed, feeling like they'd been having this same argument for months, "I did not cheat on you."
Miley looked at her and even in the poor light Lilly could see the tears in her eyes. It seemed like Miley hadn't stopped crying since they'd been trapped, but this one was all on her. "But you wanted to."
Lilly's first reaction was to lie, but she had done so much of that lately and with such poor results she knew she just couldn't do it again. All the fight drained out of her and she practically sagged against the pillar behind her and nodded her head, "Yeah."
Miley bit her lip and turned her head away from Lilly. The silence that fell over them was oppressive and Lilly stared bleakly into the near darkness, her thoughts in disarray. She knew she had messed up, but part of her was not ready to accept full blame for what had happened to them. Part of her still claimed she had done nothing wrong.
A rock exploded against the pillar next to her face and her head whipped around, expecting either another aftershock or Miley to attack her with debris. Instead she found Miley almost in a state of panic, throwing anything in her reach at the pillar and trying to pull and claw her way free from the concrete trap. Lilly was surprised Miley didn't seem to register the pain she was surely feeling from trying to pull her legs free. She jumped up to kneel next to Miley and forcefully held down her shoulders while she struggled. Miley was fighting her, even landing a half-decent blow against her chin, but Lilly did not let go.
"Miley! Stop it! You're just gonna hurt yourself!" Lilly's voice bounced loudly in the small space, but neither her words nor her actions seemed to calm Miley down.
"I hate you for hurting me," said Miley, still fighting and crying now. Lilly swallowed the lump in her throat and reached around Miley with both arms to pull the girl up and into a tight hug. Miley had no more room to fight her, arms trapped between their bodies and she merely clutched Lilly's shirt while she sobbed against her.
"I know, Miley…I know. I'm sorry," said Lilly softly, letting the tears fall freely from her eyes. She felt like she'd said the words many times before, but never before had she really meant them.
"Why?" Miley hadn't stopped crying and holding her shaking body in her arms made Lilly only more upset. How had she not stopped this before it was too late? Why had she not remembered Miley, the girl she'd loved for so long she didn't know how not to? Lilly had never given an answer to Miley's question before, but somehow, now, trapped and desperate and suddenly feeling close again, she knew she had to.
"I just…you were never home, Miles and…Mikayla and I have a lot in common, we just hung out to pass the time. At first it was just little things, a bit of flirting, or looks…I never thought much of it…but it was nice to feel wanted and…maybe I encouraged it. I liked that Mikayla made me feel special again…every time you worked late or cancelled plans it just…made me crave what Mikayla offered even more. I did want to sleep with her…part of me even wanted to hurt you…but, I knew I couldn't do that. I knew despite everything I'd only ever be able to love you, Miles."
They were silent for a while, both content to feel the other so close when it had been impossible to do so for so long. Miley sniffed, but did not move and her voice was muffled when she spoke, "You didn't touch her?"
Lilly closed her eyes, wishing she could go back to lying. She'd let Miley think for so long she had slept with Mikayla, denying it vehemently just to make it seem more obvious, but if she truly wanted her wife back, she'd have to be honest. "We kissed…just once and I stopped it after a few minutes."
Miley stiffened in her arms and tried to pull away, though a lot less forcefully. Lilly didn't want to let her go, not after having her so close again, but she felt Miley's hand against her abdomen pushing her away. She clenched her jaw.
"Miley…"
"Please, just…I just wanna lay back down."
Lilly relented and let her wife pull away. Miley laid back, her face stoic before she turned her head away again. Lilly felt a sudden clarity about what she needed to do, a longing and need to have her marriage whole again. She reached out her hand and this time did not hesitate to lightly brush the back of her hand against Miley's cheek. The other girl did not respond or acknowledge her and Lilly stood with a sigh to return to the hole to call for help.
to be continued
