Disclaimer: I don't own Framing Hanley or Mortal Instruments.
Alone in This Bed- Framing Hanley (A/N: Personally, I think this song is amazing and fits PERFECTLY with the whole twisted relationship between Jace and Clary. Placed somewhere in City Of Ashes)
(I also have found it much easier to write in third person soooo….I will be writing the rest of the chapters in third person )
Jace sighed heavily, punching the wall in frustration. The wall dented and he frowned, the annoyance only adding fuel to his very angry fire. He hated Valentine. Yes, he was technically his father but what father makes his own child believe he's dead? And not even tell him that the person he supposedly was was dead and he was some evil maniac?
Okay, well maybe the last part is slightly understandable. Valentine probably doesn't think he's neither evil nor a maniac. But he is defiantly both. And quite a few other things unmentionable.
But he didn't hate Valentine for lying to him about who he was or even his death. No, he was mad, no, he was furious, the new dent in the wall proving that was because that he lied about him having a sister. A sister that he undeniably loved and not in the correct and proper way.
The pure mention of Clary, even if it was only a thought and not even her name, sent a painful squeeze to his heart. Not just like a little tug he use to get when someone mentioned his father before he found out he was still breathing, but a more like a pair of blindingly white hot tongs were yanking hard on his heart. Being in love with Clary was like dying slowly and painfully. But he took every opportunity to be with her, taking every second he could to touch her, even if it meant just the smallest graze of his fingertips to get that electric jolt that went down his fingers straight to his heart.
He was like a crack addict, wanting only more and more with every little taste of her. And the obsession, the addiction, the cravings, only got worse with the more her got.
His heart ached, wanting to see her, needed to hold her, dying to kiss her. Jace flopped onto his pale bed, closing his eyes, letting his imagination take over him. He felt weak, incredibly weak. A feeling he didn't like whatsoever and hadn't felt until he had met Clary.
He gave a dry laugh. Jace could stand confidently and unafraid in front of a hoard of ravenous demons but when it came to the short, hardly dangerous, little red headed girl he almost fell to his knees. Not because he was afraid of her but because he was afraid of what she made him feel.
Jace felt that God had a sick sense of humor if there was a God somewhere up there. He finally allowed him to love, to be ready to give himself completely to someone else and Jace was completely ready to do that, despite the dagger Clary would forever hold over his heart. And then God decided to be funny and make them related, siblings even.
"Yeah, I'm laughing real hard big guy." Jace muttered, snatching a dagger on his nightstand, twisting it over and over again, the city lights reflected off of it. It was the dagger he'd given to Clary when they went to Magnus's party, the one she had stuck into Luke's right hand man at the Dumort Hotel saving Simon.
He sighed again his anger still bubbling in his chest. She was probably with Simon right now. The little mundane boy had finally professed his undying love for Clary and Clary didn't respond with loving him back, but she did give him a chance. A chance Jace was dying to have himself.
It did please Jace though when Simon broke up with Clary, although it made him hate the mundane even more. He was just lucky he didn't hurt Clary.
His phone buzzed on his nightstand, the knife almost slipping from his hands, a thin cut oozing blood from his palm. Jace cursed, placing the knife down on his nightstand and grabbed the phone. Placing his palm to his mouth he attempted to stop the blood with the pressure of his mouth.
It was a text from Clary. He flipped it open, reading it quickly. Hey Jace, cumn 2 the Institute 2mrw. Need to talk 2 u.
He sighed heavily not knowing if that talk would be pleasant or not. Or how it would end. Most of their conversations seemed to end with Jace angry and wanting to hit something and Clary irked, almost on the verge of tears. He begged for a different ending.
Ill b here. He sent her back, watching the bars as it told him the progress of the message being sent. With the promise of Clary coming where else would he go?
He growled, feeling weak again. She had him on a tight rope, he would do anything for her and that's what scared him. He was now at the will of someone else.
He watched the phone though, waiting impatiently for her response.
She made a sideways smiley face, something she had to explain to Jace and he felt incredibly stupid afterwards, and told her goodnight, dots after it, leaving it feeling undone. Jace said goodnight, knowing perfectly well he wouldn't be going to bed anytime soon.
The silent, unsaid, not-even-supposed-to-be-thought I love you hung heavy around Jace. It was wrong, but he wanted her. He set the phone back down, lying on top of covers, wishing he wasn't alone in that bed.
A/N: Wee…. Ok so I tried really hard to capture this song's longing feeling and depression that I think Jace feels towards Clary. I'm not quite sure if it worked but I tried!! Lol and I thought I did pretty good…. :)
