AN: More goodness coming up

AN: More goodness coming up. –Richard S.

Picking and Choosing (Tales of Hogwarts Romance) Chapter 17

The house elves had come again, they always came a few hours before he did, to fix her hair and put her in another dress. If she stunk badly they would bathe her, but usually she had to urinate on herself just to earn a bath. She was running out of time before he came through the door again, and she had almost no where left to hide strips of fabric. She had been tearing them from some of the under layers of her dress, tucking them into hiding spots to tie over the cuts, she would skip drinking water for the day, to clean the incisions with. She finished putting hiding a final strip underneath her chamber pot just as he burst through the door. He was angry, that was good, it meant more beatings, but he didn't usually rape her after he beat her as much as he was about to. She had lost track of days and months, but she was used to this, save your food, don't make noise, do what he says.

"You disgusting wench! Come here!" He screamed as she rushed to stand in front of him.

"Yes Sir." Her voice was stoic; he had taken her emotions, just like everything else. It wasn't even rape anymore, she let him do what he wanted, she had stopped fighting after the first few weeks, it was pointless.

"Don't I scare you anymore?" Malevolence was an art to this man.

"Of course you do Sir; no one is more powerful than you." She played out the line, just like usual, being sure to feign a crack in her voice and a quake in her posture as she said his name. He could tell she was faking; he pulled out his wand,

"Sectumsempra!" a crimson gash shot across the girls legs, starting at the shin of the left and traveling to the outer thigh of the right. He smiled, and reached down to touch the blood with two fingers, smelling in before wiping it on her dress, "I can smell your defiance; we'll need to get rid of that." He cast the spell again, putting a gash across her face, she reeled in pain, turning her face just in time to have the spell miss her eye, being blind wouldn't make getting away any easier. He laughed at her efforts of self preservation…

Harry was back from the hospital wing in time for dinner that night, but by Sunday afternoon Draco still hadn't returned, and Harry and Ron weren't making Illy feel any better about it.

"He's probably going to blame this on Buckbeak too!" Harry said as they walked back from the great hall. Illy didn't say anything, she just frowned, Harry moved to her side and laced his fingers into hers. Draco's absence had given him opportunity to slip into a closer, and defiantly more physical relationship with Killious, if walking her from class to class and tagging along for a majority of her outside of class activities wasn't enough his constant insistence on holding her hand and giving her pecks on the cheek at every opportunity had the school buzzing about "Harry's new girlfriend" Illy hadn't even noticed, she just wanted to get him to leave Draco alone, which was usually easiest if she went along with whatever he wanted.

"Now Harry, you were there when he apologized to Illy for the whole thing, how can you stay this mad at him? Illy told us his side of the story, so do you think that the perpetual teasing is necessary?" Hermione scolded. Harry just glared and moved his had from Illy's to wrap his arm around her waist. In honesty Killious' soul escape from worrying about Draco was going to the astronomy tower tonight. She still couldn't sleep, and had been staying up all night with Jackquinn studying dreams since the night before the accident; Jacky usually passed out around one A.M. but Illy wouldn't give in until three or four in the morning, her dreams were worse than worrying about Draco, the lack of sleep shortened them, but made them more intense.

"It's fine Herm, he can think what he wants." Illy did her best just to avoid conflict, Harry smiled at her,

"See, she agrees" He said triumphantly, everyone waited for her response, but she was silent.

"She does not! He may be a total ass but there's no way in hell she wouldn't defend him, just drop it Harry" Ron reeled at him unexpectedly. Hermione gasped, and Illy nodded at him, before lifting Harry's arm from her waste and turning to Ron.

"Thanks for saying something…Harry I don't know what he's really sorry for, but I don't much care. You can use his being in a hospital to your advantage with me all you want, but at least don't pick on him when he's not here." She turned around and continued walking, Ron continued with her, but Hermione and Harry were totally confused at the moment. Harry felt bad, he hated Draco, but this could create quite a problem in his plan to ask Killious out. He rushed back to her side,

"I'm sorry Illy, I didn't realize that it was bugging you so much," she shrugged off his bullshit apology and continued walking, in no mood to carry on the discussion. She hadn't eaten since Draco had left, and a diet of all beverages wasn't leaving her with the energy to stand up for anyone, let along be picky when they lied to her.

As they continued to the entrance hall Harry once again put an arm around her waste, but just as he was leaning in for a goodbye kiss the twins showed up from the kitchens painting.

"Illy, come with us!" They called in unison to her, she brightened up at the opportunity of getting away from Harry, as she ran across the hall towards them. "We've just found the most amazing thing in the black lake." They said as they led her through the painting.

"Guys, this is the opposite direction from the lake, shouldn't we be heading towards my dorms?" The painting shut behind them and Ron, Hermione, and Harry were left standing there, silent and confused.

"Tough break chap." Ron tried to comfort Harry by placing a hand on his shoulder.

"A lot of help you were!"

"Hey, it was better that I stopped you than then let you keep going on about Draco, I'm a disaster at reading people and even I saw that."

"It's true, Harry, if Ron notices something like that and you don't…it's a pretty big deal." Hermione tried as they all headed up the stairs.

"Forgive me for my short comings, having a man running around trying to kill me hasn't been stimulating to my ability to focus on much of anything." Harry sighed in frustration as Hermione waved them off and headed towards the library.

"Except maybe her arse, did you see how short that skirt was today." Ron spoke excitedly, relieved that Hermione had finally left. Harry perked up,

"Yeah, the only good part of my day." Harry chuckled as they made their way to the fat lady.

"But I think she's been loosing weight, she hasn't been eating with us, so I don't know, but I think I'm going to sit with her tomorrow to make sure she eats something. Draco won't be happy if he comes back to find her wasting away."

"Not you too Ron! He doesn't care about her at all, she's just a piece of ass that he want and can't have. How many times do I have to explain this, I'm so much better for her than that animal!"

"Hey, now what about me?" Ron asked, disappointed with Harry's underestimation of Ron's feelings for Illy.

"Oh, well of course…but Herm would try to kill you, she's like your mother or something." Harry jeered as they walked to a couch to start divination homework.

"Is not!...shit, we were supposed to ask one of them to help us weren't we?" Ron frowned as he looked down at the star chart.

"Bloody hell, I guess we'll be making this stuff up again."

Illy was more careful in picking a hair this time, she wanted to be someone distinct, well known, just to see how he would react. She waited until 11:55 to use her potion, to give her as much time as possible in her transformed state. She strolled down the halls, carefully and quickly, making her way to the highest point in the castle. She pushed open the hatch door to the tower, struggling in her particularly weak body to pull herself into the room, a gentle hand reached out to help her. She smiled her thanks as Theodore Nott greeted her. She hugged him tightly and planted a passionate kiss on his lips within seconds, running her fingers through his dark hair. His reaction was more tame than she expected, rigid in fact, and she took a step back when he didn't respond in the least to her kisses.

"What's wrong?" She asked, running the backs of her fingers across his jaw.

"Pansy what the fuck had gotten into your head?" He asked her with disdain, "I know I asked you out last year, but really, this is ridiculous, you're the one who wanted someone else, and you may be a total whore but I'm not that desperate, I don't need his leftovers." Illy's face turned bright red, something that never happened to her in her body.

"Shit….fuck….Theodore, that's really you…oh, well in that case I guess I should explain."

"You bet your ass you should! Not that, that wasn't the best kiss you've ever given, but still…"

"I'm not Pansy, and that wasn't my best kiss. I'm meeting someone here, he's late I guess, but we use polyjuice to hide who we really are."

"You expect me to believe that? Who is that impractical?"

"We are, and yes I expect you to believe it, I didn't even know you had asked Pansy out last year!"

"Well, it wasn't exactly public information…you're not going to tell anyone are you?"

"No, why should I?...what are you doing here?" It looked like she was off the hook and she relaxed as they took a seat near the window.

"I like it here…it's nice. No one comes up here usually."

"You don't have any one special to bring up here?" She asked, suddenly feeling bad for him as she realized just how alone he usually was.

"No." Was his curt reply.

"Why not? You're not exactly a bad looking guy Theo, but I don't even see you with guys."

"I know…I don't really like the people here. I don't need them, why waste my time with silly children?"

"I understand that I guess."

"No you don't, you're just another silly little girl Pansy, you run from one boy to the next just like everyone else, don't pretend to be something you're not. I won't tell anyone you were here and you can keep you're trap shut about me, but don't think for a second that I believe you, or someone dumb enough to run around crazy with polyjuice potion is anything but immature!" He snapped and jumped to his feet. He headed to the hatch only to have it open before he could reach it, Seamus Finnegan peeked his head through the hatch,

"Is that you?" He asked, clearly shocked out of his mind. Nott stared in utter confusion before turning back to Illy, pointing with his thumb.

"No your whore is over there Seamus, could you get out of my way." Seamus hurried out of the way and closed the hatch behind Theodore.

"What was that all about?" He asked Illy.

"I have no clue, but that is one cold son of a bitch."

"So, decided to go with a public icon of trampy behavior I see." Faux Seamus questioned.

"And what are you, kind of shamrocks? Get over here." She said, standing to throw her arms around his neck, and greet him with a less aggressive kiss that before. "So, is there an occasion for dropping a year and several inches?" She asked the boy.

"Well, I figured that you get to jump ages, so why not me." He smiled mischievously and stepped back towards the window. "I have a surprise." He moved closer to where the window hit wall, pulling on a cord, that in turn dropped the curtains that made up the walls around the room. "When Trelawny started teaching here she enchanted the walls, for this very purpose." He said turning around the room with awe.

The sight was breathtaking, the whole room was illuminated by the stars, which danced in an out of sight behind the swirls of clouds that were passing through the sky.

"Wow, it's amazing." Was all she could say, as he walked up behind her and snaked his arms around her waste, inhaling deeply to catch the scent of her hair. He scrunched up his nose,

"You smell like Draco's cologne!" She turned around a put a hand on her hip.

"That's impossible, Draco had been gone for almost a week, there's no way I could smell like him!" He laughed, entertained by just how much she was acting like Pansy at the moment.

"Well calm down, I'm not the one who smells like the devil! Besides, you probably bathe in it at night when you pray to your shrine of him!"

"He's not the devil…and I don't worship him, she does."

"Well, that should narrow down my hunt for your true identity, half of the slytherine girls are in love with Draco and the other half are in love with Snape, I'll take your confession to be a relieving denial of the latter option." He laughed as he pulled her close to him.

"I'm not in love with either one, I'm special." She said, kissing his neck, and nibbling on it softly.

"Oh really, well I can think of only one girl in Slytherin who fits into that category." She started to unbutton his shirt.

"Oh, and who would that be?" She asked as she kissed the freckles on his chest.

"It's not important, that's not who you are, so I'll just have to pay more attention to your table." Shivers ran over his body as she kissed down his stomach.

"I think you had better muscles the first night we met." She said seductively.

"Thanks, but I figured I'd try someone new, I'd hate for this to get mon-"

"Shut up babe." She silenced him with a finger, before pushing him into the pile of pillows she had been sitting on with Nott.

She straddled his waste and kissed him roughly, pulling his shirt off without breaking the kiss. "I believe this is where we were last time." He said, smiling at her devilishly.

"Oh, well I wouldn't want to be boring." She pulled his hands about his head and pinned them there, forcefully. He didn't exactly put up a fight but her unusually brisk and aggressive behavior was not unnoticed. She began to kiss down his chest again, gripping his wrists tighter the farther shot got. She hit his belt buckle, raising her head to smirk at him, before using her free hand to begin to undo it.

He easily broke free of her grasp and stopped her before she could get his zipper down,

"Stop it." He pulled her hands away and looked into her eyes.

"What? Does Pansy disturb you that much?" She asked, trying to return to her mission, he wouldn't let her.

"You're not doing this because you like me…what has you upset?" He asked, sitting up and taking her in his arms. She shook her head, appreciative of the thick curtain that Pansy's bob provided.

"I don't want to talk about it, I'm just worried…" He pulled her to his bare shoulder, kissing her lightly on the cheek.

"I don't find ways to see you just because it always ends with us snogging, you know that right?" He asked, tucking her dark hair behind her ear. She was quiet, almost impossible to hear,

"I do now" He pulled her chin, so that she was looking him in the eye,

"No more kisses tonight, just talk to me." He said, brushing his warm hand across her cheek.

"It's hard to talk about my personal life without telling you who I am."

"Would that be such a bad thing?"

"Right now it would…I have too many men in my life to be jealous of one another as is, and I'm not even dating them! I'm pulled between two sides of an impossible battle!" She was exasperated and tired, dreadfully tired.

"I'll be on whatever side you are." He leaned back onto the pillows, taking her with him, letting her rest her head on his chest.

"I don't even know what side I'm on, this runs deeper than school, this is bigger than that."

"Deatheaters."

"And family loyalties, blood lines, all those things, who has power, who has money…"

"Don't let the Slytherines like Draco talk you into things, yes they have money and power, and family ties, but just because you feel excluded doesn't mean you need to change your views….besides your family would be disappointed in you, you can't choose popularity over them." He wrapped an arm around her waste and used the other to gently stroke her hair. She sighed, desperately trying not to give herself away.

"I guess you're right, family makes the decision don't they?"

"In the end you do, but usually your parents know what's best for you."

"Yeah…I wish that were true…" She whispered the last part.

"What?"

"Nothing." She relaxed, starting to gently drift in and out of sleep, she could tell he was doing the same as his breathing became steady and he stopped petting her hair. She smiled, preparing to let herself drift completely, when she heard a loud creek from the door at the bottom of the ladder. Her head shot up and she shook the boy next to her,

"Wake up, wake up right now, we have to move!" She urged him as she helped him back into his oversized shirt. He sluggishly stood up looking around the room for what had disturbed his rest. "There are people coming, they must think we're Black, we need to move." She grabbed his hand and started searching for windows to escape through. She found a loose pane of glass, but she could hear the intruders advancing up the stairs. She pulled a desk on top of the hatch and pushed the glass through, it fell almost nine floors, as she looked down on the daunting climb below them, there wouldn't be window sills to climb onto for two floors. She turned to him,

"Can you apparate?" He shook his head no.

"I'm still learning, we're not going to jump out another window are we?"

"We have no choice, hold onto my hand." The two stepped up to the open frame, they could hear the table being shaken from below.

"On five, ready?"

"How can you be?"

"One, two…" The desk fell over,

"Five!" He yelled as the jumped, Illy focused on the image of the ground, they had been falling too long, she tried harder.

POP! They landed safely, just a few inches above the ground, before turning to find a secondary entrance to the school. The cellar doors were a few feet away, they hid in the shadows. As they moved towards the entrance they could hear McGonagall and Snape from above, cursing and searching for Black. Illy tapped on the cellar door three time,

"What do you want?" It bellowed harshly.

"Hush please! You know policy!" She held up her Gringott's key for the door to see, it swung open immediately, and slammed again once they were inside the cellar.

"Can you get back from here?" She asked, the boy nodded again, still somewhat sleepy.

"I can manage, will you be okay?" He asked, giving her a final hug.

"Yeah, I'll be fine." She smiled up at him, he gave her a soft kiss goodbye, "I thought you said no more of those for the night." She teased.

"It has to be one or two by now!" He whined back, she giggled and they went their separate ways, towards bed.