Charlie sat in the waiting room. Her mind a blur as she tried patiently to wait for news on Ruby. Anxiety building time passed by without a word from any of the medical staff. Gripping her hands together she tried desperately to stop the shaking, but it only stopped momentarily. Looking down at the picture she had taken from Ruby back at the bookies, she could feel the tears building in her eyes again. How could their lives have changed so drastically in such a short space of time? It was only a week ago that they were laughing and joking in the front yard after a water fight broke out while cleaning Charlie's car.
In the back of her mind, Charlie felt like she was being punished for something. Like the universe had somehting against her and refused to let her be happy. But what really got to her, was that Ruby was the one who was suffering the most. Ever since her daughter was a little girl, the only thing Charlie wanted was to see her smile and to see her happy. That was what really meant the most to her when she was watching Ruby grow up. If she could see that then everything else didn't matter to her. Not her career, not her strained relationship with her father. Not even the pain Grant caused her. As long as Ruby was happy, so was she.
Staring down at the picture, she felt lost. Like she was stuck on a never ending rollercoaster she couldn't get off. Suddenly, she was snapped out of her daze by the gentle caress of a hand on her shoulder. Looking up, she saw the caring gaze of Martha looking down at her. Offering her comfort and sympathy through her gesture. Sitting down beside Charlie, she gently rubbed her back and offered her words of encouragement that Ruby would be fine. As the words left Marha's mouth, Charlie found herself silently praying that she was right. But she couldn't drown out the fear that was eating away at her. Her daughter had cheated death twice, could she really do it a third time.
Out of the corner of her eye, Charlie say Rachel walking towards them. Bolting out of her seat, she stopped Rachel dead in her tracks.
"Rach, how is she? How's Ruby?", she said without so much as taking a breath.
"Ruby lost a LOT of blood". Rachel stressed looking at the fragile woman before her who was usually a tower of strength. "We had to do a blood transfusion, but other than the scaring on her wrists, we're fairly confident Ruby will be fine", she finished rubbing Charlie's arm in a comforting manner.
"Can I see her?", Charlie asked, her patience finally wearing thin.
"Of course, she's been asking for you", Rachel said, turning on her heel and leading Charlie to her daughter's room.
Rachel opened the door and gestured for Charlie to enter. Walking throught the the entrance, Charlie looked around at the surroundings she had become all too familiar with. Turning to the bed she looked at her daughter, who lay wrapped up under the covers. The only sound was that of the heart rate monitor. Rachel watched as Charlie took a seat next to the bed and as quietly as she could, she closed over the door and left the pair in peace.
Charlie sat by Ruby's bedside and gently took a hold of her daughter's hand, looking at the bulky bandaging wrapped tightly around her as if sensing her mother in the room, Ruby began to stir. Raising her free hand she rubbed her eyes, adjusting them to the light. Shifting slightly she tried to sit up, but found Charlie restraining her. Looking up at the woman staring down at her, she began to cry.
"I'm so sorry Charlie", she said, sobbing her heart out as she thought of the pain she must have caused her.
Looking into her daughter's sorrowful eyes, Charlie could see the little five year old girl she tried so hard to protect from the evil of the world. The little girl who would run home from school and jump into her arms smoothering her in hugs. The little girls who's smile could melt a thousand hearts. The little girl who managed to push aside all of Charlie's anger towards her daughter for attempting to take her own life. Regardless the reasons. The little girl who made Charlie see the other side of the tale. That Ruby loved her so much, she was willing to sacrifice her own life for Charlie's. Suddenly, she found herself sobbing with her daughter. Opening up her arms she pulled Ruby into a tight embrace and planted a kiss on top of her head.
Ruby clung to her mother's arm and buried her head into the embrace. Hours ago, she thought she would never see her again. Now, she was wrapped up in her arms listening to her mother tell her everything was going to be okay. Just like she had always done when Ruby was upset. And just as she had always done during times of distress for Ruby, Charlie climbed up onto the bed and lay back, with her daughter laying her head against her chest, clinging to her, not wanting her to let go. Wrapping both arms around Ruby, she lay silent and hushesed her daughter to sleep.
A couple of hours later Ruby was up walking around with Charlie, still slightly light on her feet, leaning against her mother and her walking cane for support. As they were coming up towards the reception desk, they were approached by Rachel and another woman, dressed in a suit. Rachel introduced the woman to Charlie and Ruby. Charlie shook her hand and introduced her self, Ruby remained apprehensive.
"Charlie this is Doctor Petersen, she like to have a chat with for a couple of minutes if that's alright", Rachel said looking between the two women.
Charlie nodded in agreement and watched on as Rachel led Ruby back to her room. Walking over to the vacant waiting area, the two women sat down and Dr. Petersen explained to Charlie that she was from a psychiatric hospital in the city. This made Charlie uneasy and she began to feel very uncomfortable in herself as the woman told her all about the facilities that were available there. Charlie looked at the woman.
"I'm sorry what's this got to do with Ruby?", she asked, nervously waiting to be told something she didn't want to hear.
The woman removed her glasses and looked down, realising this was going to be a touchy subject.
"When patients who have made an attempt on their lives are brought into hospital, it's protocol to alert the psychiatric unit as there may be many underlying issues other than what they present", the woman said, threading carefully as she noticed how tense Charlie was becoming. "While I am aware of Ruby's situation, I'm also aware that she's been through quite a few traumatic experiences over the past couple of months. Which is why I am recommending the she be committed to full time care in the city so that she can be looked after by professionals", she finished.
Charlie looked at the woman in shock. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. The woman sitting in front of her wanted to take her Ruby away to the city. The woman looked at the reluctance on Charlie's face and she completely understood why. She had seen it so many times before talking to other parents and felt for them. It's not like she was taking their kids on a luxury cruise. They would be in treatment, indulging in intense therapy sessions. Everything was far from a walk in the park. But she also knew from her professional point of view that Ruby needed it. Although she may seem fine, soon the denial would fade away and then she would find herself on the brink of total meltdown. Dr. Petersen explained this to Charlie and eventually she made a breakthrough.
Reflecting on what she had been told Charlie realised that the doctor was right. Ruby had been through so much. She didn't know how long it would take before her daughter did go into a complete meltdown and she couldn't bear the thought of witnessing that. Although still reluctant she agreed that Ruby needed the treatment and after some further discussion there was only one question left Charlie wanted the answer to.
"How long will she be there for?", she asked.
"Roughly about six weeks, if she responds well to the therapy and the treatments", the woman said.
Charlie thought to herself...six weeks, that's a long time...and then looked down at her hands. The woman continued.
"We do have a rule that states no visitors or contact with loved for the first few weeks. We like to make sure that patients settle in and feel comfortable in themselves. We feel any family contact would just make it harder on both parties if it were any other way", she finished placing a hand on top of Charlie's. "We'll be moving her today".
A couple of weeks, I've never been apart from Ruby for more than a couple of days, even when we were living apart...Charlie thought to herself as she watched the doctor enter Ruby's room to inform her of the decision that ahd been made. She didn't know how Ruby would take it. She hated the idea of Ruby being held in some facility in the city away from her. But she was worried more about how her daughter would take it. Walking towards the room, Charlie could hear the conversation through the barely open door.
"What....no....no I don't want to go!!" Ruby yelled at the woman.
"Ruby your mother and I think it would be in your best interests...."she was cut of by Ruby's sobs.
"No Charlie would never let me go...she wouldn't....."
Unable to listen to anymore, Charlie burst into the room and found Ruby in tears standing in a corner and the doctor sitting on the bed trying desperately to calm her. Walking straight over to Ruby, she engulfed her in a hug and fell to the ground with her daughter in her arms, listening to her painful cries. uby spoke into Charlie's chest.
"Please don't make me go mum.....please", was all she could manage through her tears.
"Rubes", Charlie said as she stroked her daughters hair, "Baby listen to me. I don't want you to go either, but I need to do what's best for you and I can't do that here. If I could I would but I can't. I'm sorry sweetheart, I'm so sorry. But I'll be up in the city in a couple of weeks to see as soon I'm allowed, I promise", Charlie said trying to hold back her own tears.
"I don't want to go mum", Ruby said as her tears continued to fall.
"I know baby, I know", Charlie replied desperately trying to hold back her tears.
From the door, two male nurses appeared at the doorway. Dr. Petersen nodded at Charlie to tell her it was time for Ruby to go. The nurses walked into the room and tried toremove Ruby from Charlie's grasp, but she wouldn't let go. Grabbing a hold of her arms one of the nurses unlatched them and the other pulled Ruby out of Charlie's embrace. Standing her up they led her to the door, almost dragging her. The doctor walking ahead. Charlie followed them out into the corridor and watched as Ruby fought against the two men.
"Mum, please don't make me go, please" she shouted.
The sight before her unbearable Charlie ran up to her daughter and cupped her tear drenched face in her hands, she placed a long lingering kiss on Ruby's forehead.
"I love you so much. I'll see you soon I promise", Charlie said before letting go of her daughter.
Breaking down Ruby looked at her mother.
"I love you too mum", she said and then stopped her struggle against the nurses.
Watching as they made their way down the corridor, Charlie wondered if she had made the right decision. Down the corridor, Charlie say the little five year old girl smiling back at her, and then, she vanished.
