Night Into Dawn And Beyond: Chapter 3

How could she be so stupid? Didn't she know that, being trained detectives, they would have known something had happened? First, she leaves her car at work and then arrives at work over an hour late. 'God Kate, you're so dumb,' she thought to herself. She knew they had probably already come up with many theories as of where she had gone and who she had been with.

No matter what happened, she could not tell them she was with Castle. She wanted to, but she wasn't ready. She just needed more time. She tried to think of an excuse as she got out of the taxi she was coerced to take to work. It felt like every eye was on her as she walked toward the entrance of the precinct.

She opened the door, self cautiously, and walked towards the elevator. Everyone seemed very quiet all of a sudden. She looked over to the corner and saw some people whispering while others were looking at her.

The whole squad room looked like they knew something happened. But did they know what or whom it had happened with? Probably not…hopefully not.

Getting on the elevator she rode it up to her floor. She took in a deep breath, knowing what was about to happen. The doors opened.

Every eye in the building turned towards her. Kate's hand went up to twirl her hair and she bit her bottom lip, something she did out of habit whenever she was nervous. She spotted Ryan and Esposito out of the group, both couldn't wipe the foolish grins they had spread across their faces. She walked towards her desk, not being able to suppress her cheeks from becoming red because of blushing.

"Good morning, detective." Came the familiar voice of Ryan and Esposito as they trapped her in between them and her desk.

"Good morning, boys." Kate replied, trying to ignore the fact that there was no way for her to escape their questioning.

"Have a good night last night?" Ryan asked, hoping to get some answers.

"It was good. No different from normal." Kate had found herself becoming instantly busy looking at papers that were laid on her desk. She began rummaging through them so she didn't have to look them in the face.

"We saw you take the taxi in this morning." Esposito spoke up. He was just as eager for answers as his partner was.

"I do that sometimes." Kate tried to act as normal as possible. She hated being drilled, which had started happening a lot more ever since Castle had come into the mix.

"And you left your car out in the parking lot." Ryan said, eyeing her.

"Yeah…I…" Kate trailed off, looking back down at the paper in front of her. "I want coffee." She said instantly, "Anyone else want coffee?"

She got up, pushing through both of the detective, and made her way towards the break room. She hoped that Ryan and Esposito would leave her alone and wait for her to come back, which she planned not to do. But was unfortunately stuck with them as they followed right behind. They were both snickering behind her, she could only guess what they were talking about…

"You know what's weird, detective?" Ryan said stopping in front of her as she began to pour herself some coffee.

Great, now she was trapped in between the boys and the counter. "What?" she asked trying to fake a smile.

"Security tapes." Esposito said. "We checked them and apparently you went home with Castle last night."

Shit, holy shit. Security cameras. Damnit! How could she have forgotten about those? 'What the hell were you thinking', Kate asked herself.

"I-well…I-"

"Hey guys." Said a familiar voice.

She turned her head toward the break room door and saw Castle. He was standing there, two coffee cups in hand. He simply looked at her skeptically, wondering what was going on. Ryan and Esposito were looking at him weird as well. They looked like they had a "I know what happened", look. Well they were detectives and they did work with other police officers. Perhaps some of them had seen something.

"Castle, we were just talking about you." Ryan said smiling. "We were just asking Beckett why she decided to take a taxi in this morning."

Esposito cut in. "We saw her car in the parking lot this morning, thought it odd. So we checked the security tapes…"

"And guess who she went home with last night?"

They could both not help from smiling and looking at each other before they turned back towards Castle and said at the same time, "You".

Castle hid his amusement as his eyes flashed to look at Kate's face. Her face was blank. He knew that she wanted him to deny it, to come up with some witty retort as he always did. But, for some reason he was so tempted to admit that they were seeing each other, he wanted to show her off to the world, not in a male chauvinistic way, but in a "I'm glad we're in a relationship and I'm not ashamed of you" type, way. He couldn't do that to her though. If he did, he was sure she would end it right then and there.

Castle was quiet for a few moments. Ryan and Esposito were no longer smiling. They knew that Beckett and Castle liked each other, but never thought it would actually happen. They thought Kate would be too guarded to allow someone like Castle to come in and turn her world upside down. They looked back between the two, wondering if it were really true, because if it was, they had both just lost fifty bucks.

"So it is true?" Ryan prompted, hoping to gain some ounce of reconciliation.

Kate kept looking at Castle. She wanted to tell the truth and Castle was leaving the decision up to her. He had given her time, letting them continue to see each other in secrecy. He had been patient, showing her that he cared about the way she felt. But, she also knew that he could not wait forever for her and she didn't want to hold him back. Here, in this moment, she was to make the decision. She was to decide whether she was ready or not to be open and let everyone know the truth of what was happening between them.

"No." she said and couldn't look at Castle anymore. He had turned his head down. She could sense the hurt that she had seen in his eyes. She didn't want him to be mad at her. She could tell that he was disappointed, but he let her finish. "My car was having problems so Castle gave me a ride to my apartment."

Castle turned to leave. He couldn't hear it, wouldn't hear it. He had given her time, weeks, in fact. Just hoping and praying that she would be ready to take that next step. He knew that she wasn't ready, but to hear her lie like that, he couldn't stand it. He needed room. He needed time to think.

Beckett stared after him. She felt horrible. She felt like she had just forced a dagger into his as well as her heart. She should go chase after Castle, go explain herself to him. But what else could she say to him that she hadn't already said before? She could make up excuses all that she wanted to, but she knew that wouldn't help either of them relieve the pain.

Now that she thought about it, had he ever said that he wanted anything more than sex? No. Had he ever asked her to be in a relationship with him? No. Had he ever told her that he wanted their relationship to be public? No.

But she knew. She could tell by the way he looked at her, the way he touched her, the way he held her, what he wanted. He had shown her that she meant more to him than just sex, but they had never actually talked about it. So why should he get mad when she decided not to tell anyone at work? Was she supposed to be able to read his mind to find out what he wanted from her?

True, she knew deep down what he wanted from her. How he wanted to be able to take her on dates, buy her flowers, be able to call her his girlfriend. But he had never actually said it to her. She could tell by the way he looked, touched, and talked to her that he cared, but never had he said anything. Never had he voiced out his opinions of their "relationship" to her.

Kate Beckett was found at work three hours later. She wasn't necessarily doing what some people called work. She was staring off. Her brow was furrowed, letting people know that she was thinking about something. Whenever someone went to talk to her or ask her something, she shut them off or gave them a short reply. She was not in the mood to talk to anyone, didn't feel like it, using the time she had to think.

She left right after her shift was over. She didn't stop to talk to anyone, didn't stay late as she normally did, and didn't tell anyone goodbye. She looked as though she was in a hurry, a hurry to get away from everything that surrounded her, hoping to find some peace and silence elsewhere.

She had one thing, one goal only in mind. She had to talk to him. She had to apologize, make her excuses if she must. She had to do something to explain the reason for her actions, to help realize the pain that she felt. She never meant to hurt him, she wasn't purposefully trying to cause him pain. She had to talk to him, work things out.

He hadn't been with her this whole day. She never knew how much she would miss his comments, his little remarks that normally made her skin boil. She would have done anything to have them back. She never thought she would say it, but she actually got joy out of his teasing. It made her job easier. Sometimes it held to be a distraction to her, but it helped ease the grief of some of the cases she had.

She found herself knocking on his door half an hour later. She didn't know what she was going to say, what she was going to. She hoped that by seeing him, she would open up and tell him everything she had wanted to say in the beginning.

The door opened and she found herself looking into the eyes of a teenage girl.

"Detective Beckett." Alexis said, surprised to see Kate standing outside the door.

"Alexis." Beckett said. She searched for what to say next. "Is your dad home?"

"Yeah. Come on in." Alexis said opening the door allowing Beckett to come inside.

Beckett felt awkward as she walked through the door. She suspected that most likely Alexis knew nothing of what had happened earlier. But, Alexis and her dad were close. She knew that they talked about anything. So whether Alexis knew that she and Castle had got into a fight earlier was something that she was not willing to bet any money on.

"I'm pretty sure that dad's still in his office." Alexis said pointing over to the closed door that had light streaming out from under it, noting Castle was probably working.

"Alright, thanks." Kate said heading toward the closed door.

"Dad told me what happened. He seemed upset when he got home and he told me that you guys got into a…brawl was the fancy way he put it. He hasn't left his office all day." She wasn't sure why she told Kate this. Mostly because she was worried about her dad. She had never seen him this upset before. He hadn't even eaten or stopped to take a break. Whether he was working or not, she wasn't sure.

She saw movement of a shadow from under the door now and again, as though he was pacing. She had called outside the door, asking him if he needed anything. He told her no and when she had opened the door, she found him behind his desk , laptop on top of his desk. He was staring blankly at the screen as if off in another world. She simply smiled, "Love you dad."

"Love you too, pumpkin." He had told her. She closed the door and that was that.

It wasn't until an hour later when he came out to get a bottle of water had he told her what happened. A brief description or synopsis as he called it.

"It was just a misunderstanding that happened at work." Kate tried to downplay the whole situation.

"Well whatever it was, I just hope you guys work it out. You're good for him, Kate." Wow, that was the first time that Alexis had ever used her first name, Beckett thought to herself. "You make him happy and its straightforward chemistry, you guys balance each other out." Alexis turned to walk upstairs.

Kate just stared after his teenage daughter. She had never expected to hear that come from a fifteen year old. It really showed how mature she was for her age.

She walked over to the office door. She paused, taking in a deep breath before opening the door.


1) I have a feeling the next chapter will be short because I plan it just being the *fight* (plan being the keyword here)

2) Sorry its taking me soo long to update, getting ready to graduate in two weeks, so I will be faster soon, I promise :)

3) Ok, here's the truth...After last week's episode, "Overkill", when Kate kiss Demming I was depressed...so I'm thinking thats why I let them get into a fight (I just couldnt get Castle's face when he saw them kiss out of my mind), so I wrote something on the lines of that...

4) This story changes on me constantly. I've been trying to write outlines, detailing what's going to happen in each chapter and it just doesnt work.

5) I know...there needs to be more romance, etc. I'm waiting on that though...but I promise, its coming! :)

6) I am now an established Beta Reader, need any help, just let me know :)

6) PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! Not only does it make me want to write more, but it's really encouraging and I love it!

7) Follow me on twitter or message me on AIM (clcummins12), thanks guys! :)