Hello everyone! It occured to me that I neglected to say that this fanfiction is an OU (or AU): it is not fashioned after a particular season and will probably include all the major Degrassi characters from all the seasons. Alright, that's it! Thank you to all that subscribe and comment!
TWO
I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND why Ms. Kwan was made me wait at the head of the classroom so that she could introduce me to everyone. While Degrassi was a fairly large school, from what Declan said, new kids were kind of a big deal. Then again, he and his sister Fiona had diplomats as parents and had lived exciting lives in numerous countries before their most recent stop —Canada. I was just the twin (fraternal twin, which is much less exciting than an identical twin) of KC Guthrie, some niner that got occasional playing time on the basketball team.
I sighed as students filtered into AP English and Composition. Of those assembled, I recognized Declan, Fiona…and that was it. But even as I thought this, a girl wearing a white wife-beater, jeans, and a baseball cap off to the side approached me. A smile spread across my features —she was cute.
She returned my smile. "Hi, sorry…umm, this is kinda stupid, but I saw that thing you put up on your locker…." She stopped herself, shaking her head clear and chuckling a little. "Sorry, I…" She stopped again and thrust her hand out. "I'm Alex."
Aww! She was adorable! This Alex person was dressed all bad-ass, but she was so…endearing. And pretty too. And gay, I guessed, from her introduction. "Hey Alex," I replied, shaking her hand. "I'm Jordan."
"Jordan," she repeated, now seeming remarkably more at ease as she slipped her hands into her pockets. "Do you know where I, uh…could get one of those 'We're Here, We're Queer' things?"
I shrugged, leaning against the front wall and propping the sole of my foot up. "At my old school's GSA?" I shrugged. "Sorry. But if I see any floating around, I'll let you know."
"Alright," she said. "Thanks." With one last smile, she spun on her heel and marched towards her seat where a…pink, frilly blonde with bug-sunglasses was waiting for her? I blinked. What?
Huh. I guess this proves that you really cannot judge a book by its cover.
I guess by then some of my nerves had calmed, because I assumed some of my usual characteristics that had been dormant that morning. For example, my eyes shamelessly surfed over the heads of the congregated teenagers, searching for anyone else attractive. There was Fiona, but my gaydar was beeping back negative, and if Declan and I were supposedly friends now, she was off-limits anyway. I continued to search, attempting to be surreptitious only because I caught the stare of two strangers consecutively. There was an openly gay guy sitting on the opposite side of Alex's plastic friend, chatting with her, Alex, some guy with short, curly brown hair, and…hmm. On the other side of this brown-haired kid was an orange-haired girl. Her features were soft, and her smile was small, albeit genuine. The gay guy said something funny and she laughed…a pleasant sound. She was worth watching out for, I guess.
The second bell sounded. "Alright, everyone, quiet down. We have a new student —grade nine, in fact— that is joining our class. Everyone, please help me welcome Jordan Guthrie." I rolled my eyes. What were they supposed to do, clap? Declan was looking at me, smiling smugly at the events that had unfolded. He thought this was funny. "Jordan, why don't you tell us a little about yourself?"
Was any of this necessary? "Hey…everyone," I began, straightening up. "I'm going to be in your English class so…righteousness." I could hear Declan chuckle, which was half the point of my added word, so I smiled. Just as Ms. Kwan looked to continue talking (probably probing me for information), I added, "By the way, I'm gay, so if any of you guys think you're hot-crap, cool it, and girls…well if you're interested, call me."
"Thank you, Jordan." Ms. Kwan appeared irritated but I had squeezed a few giggles out of my audience, so it was whatever. "You can take a seat next to Craig —the one behind Marco. Boys, raise your hands please."
The gay guy raised his hand, as did his brown-haired, curly-haired counterpart. By Ms. Kwan's description I figured out which was which. I maneuvered in between the rows, passing in between Alex and Barbie among others, and sat in the designated seat.
Marco —the gay guy— immediately turned around to talk to me. "Do you realize you just outted yourself to the entire class?" he asked, his eyes alarmed as if it were a real possibility that I didn't realize the words that had come out of my mouth.
I smiled and laughed a little. "Yeah, I do. Why waste the trouble telling each individual?"
Marco's eyebrows rose. "Well kudos to you, sister. I wish I was that brave."
I shrugged. "It wasn't bravery, it was practicality. Are you saying you're not out?"
"No I am." He plucked at the scarf around his neck as if that solidified his statement. "It's just that for a niner to out themselves as they are introduced to a new class is…."
"Brave," finished the guy next to me. "I'm Craig," he said, offering his hand.
"Jordan," I replied, shaking it.
"Welcome to Degrassi."
"Thanks." There was no questioning how welcoming this school was, I'll tell you that.
AP English and Composition commenced. I retrieved a brand-new, untarnished spiral from my knapsack-thing and set it on my desk. Blank, lined paper has to be the most marvelous thing in the world. Almost with regret, I put my pen to the paper and began to copy the bullets of the PowerPoint Ms. Kwan had put up.
A few minutes later, Marco turned around again and muttered, "From Alex," and tossed a square piece of paper onto my notes.
From Alex? A smile overtook my mouth as I slowly unfolded the missive, still maintaining eye contact with the teacher as she continued her lecture. Before revealing its contents I glanced at Craig, but he was busy…. "Are those song lyrics?"
Craig met my eyes for only a second before beginning to fervently scribble once more. "Yeah. Once inspiration strikes, you gotta just jot it down, you know?" He finished whatever line he was composing and gave me his attention. "I'm kinda like a singer-songwriter —playing the guitar is like, my thing."
"Oh sweet. Me too." He wore an expression that was either doubtful or surprised. "I play guitar too, and write songs, and try to sing."
I slunk into my seat and opened the note, yet I didn't get a chance to read any of it before Marco had turned around. "You play guitar?" He paused, but not long enough for me to get an answer out. "Lead or rhythm?" Another pause, still not long— "Because if you play rhythm, my friends have a band called Stüdz, and they need a rhythm guitar."
My brow furrowed. "Then they must be pretty desperate."
Marco grinned at my joke. "Seriously, they ARE desperate. Peter tried to bribe me to do it, but I play bass, and they had some niner for awhile, but he had no talent. If you're half-way decent, they'd be ECSTATIC to have you."
Being in a band? Wait, no, scratch that. Being INVITED to join a band by some guy that sits in front of my in English on my first day? What was in the Degrassi water fountains? "What about Craig over here?" I gestured at him, though his head was down and his hand was a blur of activity.
"He and Peter had, uh…" He searched for the word.
"Creative differences," finished Craig, not looking up from his work.
Marco fell quiet, leaning in, awaiting my answer. Just as I was about to give a noncommittal reply, another note plopped on top of my spiral. This one was not folded and clearly read, Read the first note! I chuckled. "Hold that thought," I told Marco, turning my concentration to the unfurled message from Alex.
What if I'm interested?
I looked up and sought Alex's eyes, finding them. They weren't anxious or anything, but… somehow expectant. I smirked at her and readied my pen.
Then prove it.
It occurred to me as the bell made itself known and people began to file out that the orange-haired girl, the one sitting on the other side of Craig, hadn't said anything after I sat down. Not to me, but I mean not to anyone. Marco, Alex, Alex's Barbie friend, and Craig had whispered things to each other, cracking jokes and discussing gossip or whatever (after the whole band discussion I thwarted and the note thing, I was actually paying mind to Ms. Kwan). She wasn't laughing with them anymore. As I stepped into the hallway I remembered that Craig had been absorbed with his song and he was the main one she was speaking with, but still. I don't know. It bothered me a little.
"Hello again," Declan said, falling in step with me as we ventured back towards our lockers. "I couldn't help but notice you fraternizing with a certain Alex Nunez."
I shrugged. "So what if I was? Don't tell me you have 'dibs' or whatever the players are calling it nowadays."
"Oh no," he assured me as we reached our location. "She's all yours."
As I exchanged my English textbook for my Introduction to Musical Theory pamphlet (don't look at me, I didn't name it), I noticed Declan surveying the halls. "Looking for someone, Gent?" I asked him, locking my lock.
"I asked Fiona to stop by my locker —I want you two to meet." Why? I didn't get a chance to vocalize my query, because right then she glided towards us with those bluish-gray irises.
"I assume you're Jordan?" she asked, openly sizing me up with those piercing eyes.
"I assume you're the Empress of the World?" Her regal attitude was what made me think of this title, and it was my lack of a cerebral censor and any sense of social tack that allowed the comment to be aloud. "It's Fiona, right?"
My second question was quick after the first, so she only faltered slightly. "Yes." She smiled a smile that in all truth, I wasn't expecting. It was not the tight, bland curling of the lips one might think, but was warm, honest.
Unfortunately a small awkward silence ensued. Silence doesn't bother me, but most people can't stand it. What else was there to say? All of us were no more than acquaintances —knowing not much else except first names. Although, right then I took another gander at the both of them…were they fraternal twins as well?
"If you'll excuse us, Jordan, I need to speak with Fiona about something." I shrugged, gathering my things and heading off. "Jordan?" I turned back around at Declan. He was grinning. "The music room would be that way." He jabbed a thumb over his shoulder.
"Thanks Gent," I said, shoving him playfully as I crossed him again. "Adios, Empress." Even as I entered the throng of loud and obnoxious teenagers, I barely grasped the next few lines of the siblings' conversation.
"Why does she call you Gent?"
"I don't know, but I kind of like it."
"But why am I the Empress of the World?"
"I guess she just enjoys giving people nicknames."
I won't bore anyone with a narration of my first day of Music Theory, because I assure that it was just as monotonous as one would imagine. I wasn't even permitted to touch any pieces of the instrument collection that inhabited the rear of the room! Mr. Regaldo gave me this huge sermon about how I needed to be responsible and bring my instrument every day. I am not entirely sure whether or not he was notified of me being a new student, seeing as he just waved me off when I tried to show him my pink paper.
Craig happened to be in my class, though, which I guess wasn't too shocking. Before I was 'so impudent as to lay hands on a mentor's tools' (Mr. Regaldo's words, not mine), the teacher was going off about how everyone needed to be able to read both treble and bass cleft and Craig and I had some time to chat. He was a pretty chill guy —very into his music. I'm not sure if he knows there are such things outside of the musical realm, but who cares? He was easy to talk to and that's the kind of companion you want on a first day. Plus he introduced me to Sav and Danny, the two guys I had seen with the lanky blonde kid (who I now presumed was Peter) that morning. They were fairly cool as well —friendly— and fueled by overt enthusiasm about getting me to join Studs or whatever.
What I found amusing about the whole situation is that they were getting themselves all worked up over a single comment I made about playing the guitar. The truth was that I was self-taught almost entirely. KC and I had taken lessons at the rec center by our old house for all of two weeks. He dropped it afterwards, complaining about sore fingertips. Pussy. I, however, looked up tabs online and achieved a pretty well-rounded understanding of my abilities. The thing was, while I could read tab and knew a plethora of chords (it just so happened that I did prefer rhythm, not lead), I couldn't read music at all, treble or bass.
It goes without saying that I was determined to keep this fact hidden from Regaldo for the duration.
Class was over, and much to my surprise, Declan was waiting for me just outside the door. When he said he was trying to make friends I didn't know I was inheriting a lapdog. "Hey," I greeted, folding the brochure-thing and sticking it into my back pocket.
"How was Music Theory?" he asked.
I couldn't tell if he actually gave a crap or was just making conversation, but I indulged him either way. "Boring. The instructor —Regaldo— has already decided he doesn't like me. Plus I guess I'm supposed to bring my own guitar and know how to read notes."
He snickered. "You're taking AP Music Theory and you can't read music?"
I punched him in the arm. "I can learn! The thing is, I haven't touched a guitar in six months, let alone own one."
Declan made a clicking sound with his tongue. "Tough break, kid."
Kid? Really? Ugh, whatever. Declan could go screw himself. I stayed in step with him, though, because he knew his way to the Caf and I didn't.
Against what one might suspect, the layout of the place was clever, so it didn't really seem crowded at all. Vending machines lined one wall, and there was a buffet line on the adjacent side. Teenagers populated the numerous tables, yet most were not so encumbered as to explode. And the place didn't even smell like whatever they were serving today.
"If you have nowhere else to sit, Fiona and I eat lunch over there." He indicated an island by the windows. "Although it seems like your brother wants you."
I followed his gaze and found KC, Alli, Jenna, Claire, and two other boys I didn't know. They were all staring at me. "Are you sure that look is a 'come here' look? It resembles a 'stay away or else' more closely to me."
He smiled. "Well if you desire different company, you know where to find me."
He began to walk away, but I grabbed his arm. "Just a second," I said, half-stalling, half-curious. "What was it that you needed to talk to Fiona about?"
"Oh, that. Our parents are throwing a little rendezvous tonight, and if you have nothing /better to do, I thought I'd invite you." He must have read my glare. "As friends, Jordan —I understand that we don't bat for the same team. Fiona and I have already invited Peter and Mia, so why not? You can bring your brother if you'd like."
Same Peter as the Stüdz's Peter? Hmm. "I'll think about it."
Declan inclined his head. "That's all I ask."
As he joined his sister at their lone table, I got into the buffet line. Today's delicacy? Worm-like noodles with melted bricks on top. Lovely. I took my tray and found KC's table again. It would seem that they hadn't taken their eyes off of me since I entered the Caf.
"Hello everyone," I said a bit awkwardly, sliding into the end seat of the far bench. KC was opposite me, and the guy on my right was someone I had yet to be introduced to.
"Hi Jordan," Claire said sweetly, positioned next to my twin. "How are your classes going?"
"They're going fine. Just, you know…sitting there…taking notes…listening to teacher's drone on and on…" My voice trailed off. Each one of them was still looking at me. I struck my food with my spork and began to twirl. "So, uh, how was your guys' day so far?"
"Good."
"Fine."
"Alright."
"Pretty good."
"Okay-ish."
I looked to KC, but he was just messing around with his spaghetti. Just as I was about to ask him the question directly, the kid to my right started talking. "The name's Dave," he told me, holding his hand out not for a shake, but for that slap-and-punch thing people do. I indulged him. "I'm on the basketball team too."
"Sweet." I flashed him a smile and opened my mouth to ask KC—
"I'm Connor," said a big kid with glasses on Claire's other side. "I keep track of all the stats and I'm the water boy and I'm the equipment manager."
I nodded at him. "Awesome," was all I said. For a time lunch was uneventful and suckish. KC's friends loosened up eventually, and the conversation flowed or whatever, but he stayed sort of quiet. At first I couldn't figure out why, but as my eyes wandered around the Caf they found Alex's, and that got me thinking. Did he notice my locker? What if he caught wind of my little speech in Ms. Kwan's class?
Oh boy. Well, at least he wasn't acting like it was a big deal in front of his (our?) friends. But if that was why he was grumpy, I was going to get to look forward to an earful on our walk to the group home, and if not then, later that night.
Little Miss Sunshine pushed her tray away, drawing back my attention. "Claire-bear and I are going to the library to finish our project," she announced, taking Claire's arm and standing.
"Oh, okay," Dave said, half-standing up himself. "I'll catch you later then, Jenna?"
The blonde gave a vague yet somehow still sickly sweet smile as she flurried her fingers at him and the girls left. Out of my peripheral vision I could see Dave witnessing their departure. So Dave liked Jenna? Good to know, I guess.
"God she drives me insane," Alli said as soon as she felt the two were out of hearing.
"Be nice," KC mumbled as he pushed his tray away as well. It didn't seem like he had eaten any school-distributed pasta…just played around with it.
"What's wrong with Jenna?" Connor asked. He eased his glasses up the bridge of his nose and a bell signaled lunch's end.
"She just BUGS me!" Alli continued, throwing away the remainder of her meal. "Claire and I were just fine by ourselves and then she comes along and suddenly they're BFFs." She made a disgusted noise. "So frustrating."
KC didn't say anything as he tossed his food and didn't even look at me as he started to exit. I stuck my tongue in my cheek and threw away my trash, leaving myself. He wanted to give me the cold shoulder, fine. I am gay. He got to pretend all morning that it was 'just a phase' or 'something we just weren't going to talk about.' Now he needed to come back to reality. This was me.
History was history. The instructor, Mr. Perino, made a point to let me know that getting into AP US History was nothing to be egotistical about. He sat me next to Danny, that one guy from Stüdz, and near a guy named Derek.
They talked incessantly the entire time until I was ready to rip my hair out.
Algebra II was taught by Coach Armstrong, so it involved a lot of in-your-face 'encouragement.' I can honestly say I wasn't paying too much attention. There was a very, very beautiful girl that sat on the other end of the classroom. So straight though… so devastatingly straight. But the good thing about that was this: I am not attracted to unavailable people. No joke. I'm very good about ignoring my straight crushes until they fade away and very good at focusing my energy on more promising prospects. So while this tan-skinned model with luscious chocolate curls and big, brown eyes was very fun to look at, I fought down the dancing balls of yellow fluff that wanted to parade around in my chest.
Biology was next. I accidently bumped into someone named Johnny DiMarco, who I was %95 sure was Alli's Johnny by his testosterone-y reaction; finally met Peter, who attempting to interrogate me about my guitar skills and the probability of me joining his band, but I didn't give him much to work with; was introduced to Peter's ultra-masculine jock friend Riley, who said he was dating Fiona…I don't know, my gaydar was telling me contrary things; and sat next to Alex and her friend Jay, but employed minimal small-talk because of the way her friend was standing over her possessively.
School was over. The class was in the process of vacating the room. I made to fly as well, but the way Alex was looking at me told me to stay, so I stalled. She and Jay were having some sort of silent conversation. She shoved Jay and he didn't not look happy, but reluctantly let us be. The teacher had gone maybe five minute previous to go make copies, so we truly were by ourselves.
She laughed, maybe a little nervous. "You are a very hard person to get alone," she said, fixing the angle of her baseball cap.
I leaned against my desk, smiling at the ground a little. "I am?"
"Yeah, and it's your first day."
I laughed gently, flicking my hair out of my eyes. "I'm sure it wasn't THAT difficult."
She mimicked me, hopping atop her desk. "Well I didn't get a chance to flirt with you during English —Marco was all over you. I wanted to wait for you after class, but Declan was already there and Paige was being impatient. At lunch I successfully caught your eye…" She paused and my ears grew hot, but I hoped my hair was long enough to cover at least the tips. "…but it seemed like there was some tension with your brother and you stormed off."
I shrugged. "Sibling shit," was all I said, looking at her again. "I have to admit, I am curious how you intend to prove your interest."
She smiled to herself. "My trying to get you alone all day wasn't enough?"
I wanted to kiss her. In fact, that was all I was thinking about the entire period and up until that moment. She was very pretty and gay and with all these new variables in my life…it would be great to have a constant. But in the back of my head I knew my mind was going a million miles a minute and I was only feeling vulnerable because of my… recent misfortune. Yet I was also a horny teenager who…had a twin waiting for her somewhere. Goddamn it.
"Turns out it was," I said, making up my mind. "Unfortunately I have to get going, though. I haven't seen…our new house yet, so it's not like I can meet up with him later."
"Oh, I get it," she replied, getting off her perch.
"But," I touched her hand, halting her progress. "Do you think that maybe I could have your number?"
She smiled and I think blushed, but her skin was dark enough to where I couldn't be sure. "Yeah, you can." She took my hand and took a Sharpie, writing down the numbers. "Call or text —whatever."
"I'll be calling," I told her, taking back my hand and staring at the numerals. "I don't have a cell phone as of yet." My hand returned to my side and I smiled at her. "I'll see you tomorrow."
I left the classroom and started down the halls, which were a lot emptier than I had yet to see. I thought about Alex, about how I knew nothing about her, and knew nothing about anyone I had met that day. I thought about Declan, and what utilitarian motives he must possess, and the invite to his parent's party that night. I thought about Marco and Stüdz and what accepting or declining THEIR invite would affect my future. I thought about the stranger that was my brother, and how I had no choice about my place of residence or where I was getting an education. I thought about how one misstep could land me in juvenile hall.
So I slowed my pace, took a deep breath, and prepared to take the dive.
