Lisa: Okay, so I know I haven't updated in like forever, which is awful of me and everyone deserves an apology, but I don't really believe in virtual apologies. . . .so I will just say that I will try really hard to never again let it go this long!
xX Truth is that I have been really depressed, and had to see a counselor, and erm, I'm betterish, so now I will go back to fanfiction writing. There is no need to worry about that, and don't be afraid that reading my stuff with make you depressed, cause it is still comedy after all Xx
Mello: Yeah, was that why you left me all alone locked in your closet for this long? .
Lisa: . . .yes
Mello: oh, okay, well now I'm out and need a shower.
Lisa: ok, go take your shower. :
(I absolutely (for now) don't own any death note character or Japanese Hershey bars (if even existent), I do however own Sierra D. Ethans and Saffron! I 3 Saffron.
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"Come with us, or die." Came the words of the man/woman now pointing a gun at me; I really didn't mean to offend her, but after a little while of arguing back and forth, he got bugged and pointed a gun at my head, and I figured out he was a guy (not because of his voice, not because of the gun). I was at this time still being held by a guy named "Matt" probably one of his dumb criminal cronies.
"Fine" I spat, "but if you try anything funny you're going to pay with a pound of flesh" I said trying my best to sound intimidating, but only sounding a bit poetic; and remembering ruefully that I had formerly failed at biting.
"Whatever" said the man motioning to his mugger; who then dragged me into this garage cell looking place I was wondering why not just knock me out, I mean I had figured I was an easy target, but maybe they were hoping to get a ransom, "good luck" I thought, again feeling briefly homesick.
To my great surprise they plopped me on a comfortable couch, and didn't even tie me up or anything (unlike my last kidnapper) they just started acting like nothing had happened; Matt was pulling out some kind of hand held electronic that was making shooting noises, and the man was opening a cabinet.
"Saffron!" he yelled, "where is my chocolate?"
There was no answer.
"Saffron!" he shrieked louder followed by some unmentionables and a few curses, he stalked off apparently to find Saffron.
"Well hi" I said finally coming to the conclusion that they had just roughly invited me over for lunch.
"Hey there" said the red headed video game addict sitting in the corner. He then glanced up at me as if he just now noticed I was here.
"Aren't you guys going to tie me up or anything?" I asked, speaking before thinking as usual.
"Sure okay" said Matt so he went off, he came back a few seconds later with a rope in hand.
I stood up suddenly; "On the other hand" I started "I was just joking".
"I'm not" replied Matt now stepping continually closer.
I was trying to figure out what to do, I mean run? Scream? Do the hokey pokey? There were so many options for self defense, yet I felt defenseless.
Matt was very close now, it was a little bit familiar, oh yeah Light, I then remembered something.
"Matt?" I asked. "What is your favorite cereal?"
Matt backed-up looking at me like I was some random piece of cauliflower that had just then decided to speak.
"What does cereal have to do wi-, Wait, you mean Serial, right?"
"Well yes, so what's your favorite?"
"Probably Serial Womanizing, but I'm sure my boss is into Serial Killing." Said Matt calmly, as if this had been discussed previously, and it was now common knowledge.
"I've never heard of those cereals, man they sound awful, what do they taste like?"
Matt then realized that I was in fact asking about breakfast cereals and was trying to figure out why when Mello came in, with another Lady who was wearing a motorcycle jacket and muttering about men always loosing things and being unhealthy.
"WHERE IN THE STUPID-HEADED WORLD, DID YOU SLAP-DRAGON PUT MY CHOCOLATE!" roared Mello, seemingly annoyed about everything in the SHEEP-GRAZING PLANET!
"Darling, I think all this chocolate will wreck your nice gangster figure, so I-" Then Saffron (assuming the name) got cut off by another explosion from the man lady. Matt was meanwhile trying to explain something to Saffron about why she should leave, because he was just about to tie someone up on the couch and have a fun time, but I was too tired to think, I was hungry and exhausted, I hadn't eaten or slept in awhile, so I decided to speak up.
"Excuse me?" I asked "Can I eat something, and sleep?"
"Yep" said Selena perkily "Sorry Sweetie, I didn't notice you at first." She went over to the same cabinet that Mello was looking through so vigorously and produced a box of potato flakes, and handed it to me, saying that this should cheer me up, she then steered Mello out of the room.
I looked at the box dolefully wishing it was something more delicious, but when opening it, I found that it was filled to the brim with chocolate! I stuffed myself rapidly unaware of the ruffled red head watching me.
"What?" I asked when I noticed "Haven't ever seen a woman eat?"
Matt didn't respond instead he gently took the box of chocolates away and set them on the table, he sat down next to me (on the couch, which is where I was this whole time) and asked a question, that I had been struggling with myself for like 20 hours.
"Where did you come from?"
"mhhhfff geh huggish wiffle." I responded still trying to chew like five Japanese Hershey bars at once.
Matt waited till I was done, and continued.
"Like, your not the same, you look different, like some cartoon or something, and you don't act like your from this world at all."
"Well yeah" I said trying to forget about actually being swirly girly ballerina or whatever I was. "I'm not, like from your gothic city, where everyone dies the entire time, world. Who would want to be? I mean your world seems harsh and violent."
"It is." Said Matt with a sigh. "But it's real, and I anyway would rather have the truth about the world, than live in some fake dream where everyone shares lollipops and bubbles in a field of flowers."
Before I could respond to this odd but deep analogy, Saffron marched into the room, slamming the door behind her.
"THAT MAN!" stormed saffron. Waving a knife around in the air. (Luckily missing Matt's questioning comment, on Mello's gender.)
"What did he do?" I asked, wondering if the knife meant murder and shaking at the prospect.
"HE IS EATING CHOCOLATE!" Roared Saffron.
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Meanwhile in the kanto region. . . .
It had been a looong day, he went to school, went to the library and now he was planning to study till he was assured of an 110 percent.
What was that thing that kept bothering him the back of his head? He had dealt with his criminal killings today, he was still top in his class, he was making it appear that he was blameless and perfect . . . what was it then-oh snap! It hit him.
"Ryuk?" he asked "did the girl from ballet and the beast happen to be here this morning?"
"ha ha nope, she escaped while you were asleep." Replied Ryuk, cracking up at the thought of light forgetting something.
"What, why didn't you tell me at once, she knows my secret, I've got to kill her!"
"You tried that remember, it didn't work." Said Ryuk.
"That's because Ballerina Pink-Pink isn't her real name- she never told me her name!" I've got to find her fast before she leads a life in this world, and people start to recognize her existence."
Just then a huge gust of wind blew and a newspaper landed at Light's feat.
He picked it up and gaped at the front headline.
Crazy Blond, Attacks FBI in a local Diner!
The most unusual things happen in life for a reason; this was one of those things. If you were walking by and you saw a young man gawking at a picture in the news paper, a picture of the girl who had escaped his bedroom, the girl he needed dead. You would have passed by, not concerning yourself with stranger's affairs (especially one yelling at himself), not taking part in noticing the unusual happenings in the life around you, the life you're lucky to be living.
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A couple hours later when Saffron had thoroughly beaten Mello to a pulp, and Matt was in the corner playing Mario (no surprise there), Saffron had gone to the grocery store to rob some salad and try to teach Mello the importance of vegetables. So with nothing else to do I went over to comfort Mello in his state.
"Um, do you need some band-aids or something?" asked Sierra, standing a safe three feet from the injured mafia boss. He was in a back storage room, with a dumpster in the center of it.
"Get away from me!" he grumbled into his shirt, hunched up against the wall.
"Hey you're the one who kidnapped me, in return for that inconvenience at least allow me to help!"
"I don't need help; I don't need anyone, not my parents, not my sister, not anyone."
"I didn't know you had a sister!" I blurted before I could stop myself.
"Of course you didn't." said Mello raising his head long enough to give me a "your obviously weird" look.
"I mean, correct, ha ha, I don't know you're a crazy jealous lunatic, and have a thing against near or anything."
Mello's facial expression was priceless, I mean I understand that it's stupid and mean, but messing with hot anime guy's life brings such joy.
Then I rethought saying those things, for Mello was now pinning me to the dumpster, which was not comfortable, and breathing down my neck.
"You- take it back- how do you-?" Mello's thoughts were as muddled as his speech, but my mind was sharp enough to distract him from strangling.
"What is your favorite breakfast Cerial?"
"Wuh?" asked Mello, slightly confused at my reaction.
"What is your favorite breakfast Cerial?" I repeated again.
Mello put me down and studied me.
"Trix!" he said before stalking off to his room.
"hhhhmmmmfff" said Matt standing in the door way and trying to stifle his laughter.
"what's so funny?" I asked
"You!" said Matt. "That was amazing! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"huh?"
"Come on, we need to have a little talk." Said Matt suddenly getting serious.
So I walked with him into the main filthy room and sat reluctantly on the couch again (since the chocolate, I was awake enough to notice the soot), Matt plopped down next to me, I refrained from telling him that he was sitting on chewed gum.
"There are three questions I must ask, Firstly how do you know about near?" asked Matt
So I explained as best I could about how I was from America, and how here I was from a manga and to me I'm in a manga now, and I've watched this show, except Matt wasn't really in it that much, and that's how I know who near is.
I could tell with annoyance that he believed I was insane and had been brainwashed or was really bad a lying, so he asked another question.
"Secondly, if you know all this, why don't you know about Mello's sister?" Matt asked leaning even closer and staring intently into my eyes.
So I explained as best I could, that the show didn't go into Mello's past really; all I knew about it is that he was probably catholic (and a not very sane one at that).
Matt then began to explain Mello's past, and I listened.
"A long time ago, in 1987 Mello was only 7 at the time. Mello's Father took Mello and Felicity to Church every Sunday morning, when one day, his mother collapsed of heart failure . . .and died, that same day their church burned down, everyone but her got out alive, and they never rebuilt it; but alas because of his Father's belief to go to church, he continued to take them, to the burnt spot where the church used to be, where a death took place, and they would stand there and possibly sing, until 3 years after his mother's death, his father standing there at that burnt spot, had a heart attack, and died. It is not possible to murder someone, by means of a heart attack, but if it were, Mello would've suspected his Sister, Felicity. Mello was only 10. . . . he was taken to Whammy's orphanage. . . . all he had was his cross necklace . . . that's it"
"Wow, I mean I knew he was an orphan, but I never thought about such a stressful life, I always thought it was abandonment or something." I said, horror struck that such a thing happened. "Now what was your other question?" I asked sweating slightly as Matt got closer.
"Thirdly, Will you let me kiss you?" asked matt, before I could respond he leaned in and kissed me.
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Lisa: Wow, I did not see that coming, I guess I should have though, matt's kind of a player. (I wonder what Light would do to him)
Mello: they made me look like a freezing cry baby o
Lisa: oh yeah how was your shower?
Mello: . . .um wet? Why?
Lisa: Oh no reason, by the way you're missing something.
Mello: O_O give me back my TOWEL!
