Part 6 – Forks (again)

"This is going to go down in history as one of the worst days of your life, isn't it?" Emmett grinned at me in amusement and I leaned against the side of the car and sighed deeply.

"Probably."

"Crawling to Edward and Bella…having to apologise…" Emmett went on gleefully, clearly relishing the prospect of watching me squirm. "Having to admit you were wrong…oh baby doll, it just doesn't get a lot worse than that for you, does it?"

I shoved him hard. "Shut up. It's going to be bad enough without you going on about it! I fully admit I did the wrong thing and I'm going to apologise to them both. Nothing anyone can say is going to make me feel any worse than I already do."

"Aww, baby," Emmett repentantly draped an arm over my shoulder and kissed the top of my head. "I'll lay off. I know you feel bad, but it all worked out in the end. Edward will probably make you crawl, but he'll get over it in the end. And Bella's cool, she won't be a bitch about it."

I nodded without speaking, leaning in to Emmett's reassuring bulk as we waited with the car in the airport parking lot. I knew very well just how lucky we'd been that things had worked out as they had, that Alice and Bella's journey to Volterra had been successful and that they, and Edward, were now returning home no worse for it.

I took Emmett's wrist and looked at his watch. "They must have landed by now."

As if on cue we heard noises from the other end of the parking lot and looked up to see Carlisle, Esme and Jasper with the returned travellers. Alice didn't look at me and Edward stared through me frostily. Bella, being half carried along between Edward and Esme, looked around with eyes glazed with exhaustion.

"She feels awful." I heard Esme, dear sweet Esme who hated conflict of any kind in her family, whisper to Edward when she saw him look at me.

"She should." Ouch. No tone of understanding from Edward there. I shifted slightly and Emmett rubbed a hand against my side.

"Just take it baby doll," he murmured. "Let him bitch and get it out of his system. Be over quicker that way…I've had experience here!"

Bella mumbled something, and Esme gave Edward a pleading look. "Let her make amends. We'll ride with Alice and Jasper."

"Please, Edward," whispered Bella, and although his face looked no more forgiving he sighed and towed her towards our car.

Emmett started the car and then raised his eyebrows at me with a smirk. Taking a deep breath I turned to the backseat where Edward was sitting with Bella cradled against him.

"Edward," I began.

"I know," His tone was brusque and not kind. I mentally ran through the thoughts and beliefs that had led to me calling him in South America, knowing he could hear them and hoping that thoughts, rather than my clumsy words, could make him understand.

No such thing to help with Bella. I said her name, hesitantly, and watched her eyelids flicker open. She seemed shocked to have my golden eyes meeting her brown ones. "Yes, Rosalie?"

"I'm so very sorry, Bella. I feel wretched about every part of this, and so grateful that you were brave enough to go save my brother after what I did. Please say you'll forgive me." My soul writhed under the humiliation. Oh, I meant every word, no doubt about that, but admitting my faults and failings aloud had never come easy to me and the words sounded stilted and awkward from embarrassment.

"Of course Rosalie," Bella mumbled, her bleary eyes on mine. "It's not your fault at all. I'm the one who jumped off the damn cliff. Of course I forgive you." She was so tired her words ran into one another and she wasn't even finished speaking before her eyes closed again.

"It doesn't count until she's conscious, Rose," Emmett chuckled and laid a hand on my knee.

"Let her sleep," Edward said, but his voice was softer now.

She did sleep then, and there was silence for a while before I tried again. "I really am sorry Edward."

"I know." He spoke much more evenly now, and I felt some of the tension leave me. "It was a mistake, and I suppose you were not the only one who acted thoughtlessly."

"No, she wasn't the only one," Emmett scowled ferociously at Edward. "Running off on some half assed suicide mission without even saying goodbye? Try that shit again, brother, and there will be trouble. Fucking hell Edward, if we weren't all so damn glad you're still alive there would be some ass kicking over this, let me tell you."

Edward laughed comfortably. "I don't think you need worry about it Emmett. I have no plans to return to Volterra at any time in the foreseeable future." He glanced across at me. "Rose? You and Emmett were on your way to Volterra when Alice told you to stay?"

"Tickets bought and paid for," I said with a shrug. "It was my mistake that sent you there, I couldn't do nothing."

He didn't say anything else, but as Edward caressed Bella Swan's hair he looked at me and gave a slow and thoughtful nod, and I sat back in my seat feeling relief at what I knew was his forgiveness. Oh, he was still angry over it all, still blamed my arrogance and thoughtlessness for a great deal (and blamed me fairly, I reluctantly acknowledged) but he knew what it had cost me to face the idea of returning to Volterra. My willingness to go showed more remorse than any words I would say ever could, and Edward was satisfied with that.

There was a scene outside the Swan house as Bella was reunited with her obviously furious father. My lip quirked in a smile as Charlie Swan very clearly showed Edward what he thought of him, practically wrestling Bella out of Edward's arms. Edward caught her as she fell, and carried her in to the house, Charlie still shooting daggers from his eyes at my brother.

"I think I could like Charlie Swan," I said thoughtfully, and Emmett laughed.

"Glad you didn't have any kind of overprotective father I had to deal with baby doll."

I snorted. "Please. Carlisle was the closest thing I had and he was delighted to have you take me off his hands." I paused. "Well, sort of off his hands…I guess he did keep us both around."

Edward slid into the back seat. "I think Charlie needs to see me leave. Drop me round the corner and I'll go back."

Emmett started the car and moved off smoothly. "I don't think he's all that keen on you dude."

Edward gave a lopsided smile. "Well, no…but in the great scheme of things it's not a problem I give much thought too." As Emmett idled the car around the corner, Edward leaned forward and touched Emmett affectionately on the shoulder. "Thank you. I'll see you both later on." And he was gone.

Emmett drove us home. In Denali Carlisle and Esme had returned from their hunting trip just after we had received word that Edward, Bella and Alice were all safe. Apologising to our friends for the disrupted visit we had immediately packed our things to return and open up the Forks house, knowing that Edward would not want to part from Bella now. With the dust sheets off the furniture and my clothes back in the closet it felt as though we'd never left. Even the Jeep was still in pieces in the garage, and I made a mental note to purchase a new one for Emmett as soon as I could get in touch with the dealer.

Back at the house Emmett and I joined the others in the living room, listening to Alice fill us in on the happenings in Volterra. It took all my self control not to shudder as I thought of the vampires there, with their judgements and powers of life and death, and I was grateful to be sitting here beside Emmett, his broad chest against my back and his big arms holding me safe.

"So Bella will be one of us one day," Carlisle said musingly.

"It would seem so," Alice said tranquilly. "Edward is still being difficult, but it's really not all about him now."

"He'll give in to the inevitable," Emmett said cheerfully. "He'll find some way to work it all out to his advantage, too…he's a crafty bastard when he wants to be." He kissed my head and smiled. "Bella's fun…baby vampire Bella is going to be a blast."

I felt Alice's eyes on me and looked back at her. "Do you forgive me?" I asked directly.

She sighed and smiled. "Of course. It was a misunderstanding, I know that. I was frightened and angry when I spoke to you on the phone straight after you'd spoken to Edward, and I probably wasn't at all fair to you."

"I really thought he should know," I said quietly. I took in everyone else in the room. "You all know I've been against his relationship with Bella, but I need you to believe that I did not find him and tell him she was dead with any sort of vindictive pleasure. I thought he should know, and that's the truth of it."

"We believe you Rosalie," Carlisle said, and Esme nodded at me with a gentle smile. I knew that this whole episode would not be forgotten quickly, but we had eternity…we would move on.

Needing to feel like myself again, I headed out to the garage. I took my laptop and sat with it on the bench, searching out a new Jeep for Emmett. I had just wired a fairly ridiculous amount of money for something I would practically rebuild immediately when Emmett came out in to the garage to join me.

"I'm starting on your new Jeep," I offered, showing him the images on the web. "I've got orders in and it will be delivered within a couple of day I hope. It looks like we'll be staying here in Forks for a while now, so the Jeep will be handy."

"Cool," Emmett looked at the photographs and then shut the laptop and pushed it aside. "I like it in black, it'll look pretty badass once you're done with it." He stood between my legs and pulled me towards him, and I leaned forward and kissed him lightly. From my position sitting up on the bench we were the same height.

"You were good today baby doll," Emmett murmured against my mouth. "Apologising and all…I know how you hate admitting you're wrong."

"Hmmm." I slid my hands under his shirt and stroked the length of his back. "I'm just glad everyone is prepared to forgive me. Even Bella, I suppose."

Emmett's tongue traced over my lip, and I opened my mouth willingly to his. A moment later he broke away and looked at me with a crooked smile. "You weren't the only one at fault, angel girl." His hands caught in my hair and he moved my head back towards his, kissing me deeply once again. "My beautiful girl…I love you."

I pressed closer to him, and once again nothing mattered but him, and the two of us being together. The rest of the world could do what it would, but for Emmett and I right then there was nothing but the pleasure of being in love and being together.

Hours later I heard Edward calling everyone. Emmett and I had been playing x-box (such a human obsession of his!) and I was happy enough to toss aside my controller and go see what he wanted. As I descended the stairs, Emmett's hand in mine, I smelt the unmistakeable human scent of Bella.

We gathered in the dining room, taking our seats around the table, an action which clearly indicated the seriousness of the situation. I caught Bella looking at me doubtfully, and I did my best to smile at her.

Carlisle, seated on one side of Bella, nodded at her. "The floor is yours."

"Well, I'm hoping Alice has already told you everything that happened in Volterra?"

"Everything," Alice said. She had a smug smile on her face- clearly her sight had told her what this was all about. I glanced across at Edward, whose face was stern.

"So, I have a problem," Bella went on. "Alice promised the Volturi that I would become one of you. They're going to send someone to check, and I'm sure that's a bad thing- something to avoid. And so, now, this involves you all. But, if you don't want me, then I'm not going to force myself on you, whether Alice is willing or not." Bella held up a hand to stop anyone interrupting. "Please, let me finish. You all know what I want. And I'm sure you know what Edward thinks, too. I think only fair way to decide is for everyone to have a vote. If you decide you don't want me, then…I guess I'll go back to Italy alone. I can't have them coming here."

There was a rumble of anger from Edward, and I raised my eyebrows at Emmett. She would go back to Volterra, alone, in order to spare us retribution?

"Taking into account, then, that I won't put any of you in danger either way, I want you to vote yes or no on the issue of me becoming a vampire." She gave a half smile and looked towards Carlisle.

"Just a minute," Edward said. "I have something to add before we vote." He clasped his hands together on the table top. "About the danger Bella's referring to," he went on, "I don't think we need to be overly anxious. You see, there was more than one reason why I didn't want to shake Aro's hand there at the end. There's something they didn't think of, and I didn't want to clue them in. The Volturi are overconfident, and with good reason. When they decide to find someone, it's not really a problem. Do you remember Demetri?"

Bella clearly did remember, because she shuddered. My own memories of Aro's guards rose in my mind and I bit my lip, wondering what Bella had seen.

"Now the whole time we were with any of them, I was picking their brains for anything that might save us, getting as much information as possible. So I saw how Demetri's talent works. He's a tracker- a tracker a thousand time more gifted than James was. His ability loosely related to what I do, or what Aro does. He catches the …flavour? I don't know how to describe it…the tenor…of someone's mind, and then he follows that. It works over immense distances. But after Aro's little experiments, well…" Edward shrugged.

"You think he won't be able to find me," Bella said flatly.

Edward nodded smugly. "I'm sure of it. He relies totally on that other sense. When it doesn't work with you, they'll all be blind."

"And how does that solve anything?" Bella's voice was sceptical.

"Quite obviously, Alice will be able to tell when they're planning a visit, and I'll hide you. They'll be helpless. It will be like looking for a piece of straw in a haystack!" He glanced across at Emmett, and the two of them smirked at each other, clearly enjoying the plan.

"But they can find you," Bella argued.

"And I can take care of myself."

Emmett laughed, and he and Edward fist bumped each other. "Excellent plan, my brother."

I was furious with Emmett's cavalier attitude to risk, and hissed "No!"

"Absolutely not," Bella added, and for the first time the two of us eyed each other in complete agreement over something.

"Nice," Jasper said, happy to join in with the other boys' plans.

"Idiots," Alice muttered, and I rolled my eyes. Bloody boys! Maybe it wouldn't be so bad having another girl around if Bella had her way. Alice and I could use another sister on our side.

Bella breathed deeply and sat up straight. "All right then. Edward has offered an alternative for you to consider. Let's vote." I could tell she was trying to appear calm, as she looked towards Edward. "Do you want me to join your family?"

Edward's eyes were dark and he set his mouth obstinately. "Not that way. You're staying human."

"Alice?"

Alice hardly let her finish speaking. "Yes."

"Jasper?"

"Yes," he said quietly. I was not surprised, but I caught the flash of surprise in Bella's face. She was very easy to read. She had not been sure of Jasper at all, but I knew he didn't mind Bella. I also knew that not wanting to kill her and drain her body of blood every second he was around her would be a relief for him.

Bella looked at me, no doubt wishing that I would have no part of deciding her fate. She'd known my feelings. "Rosalie?"

I bit my lip but could not, in the end, say anything but the truth. "No."

She was not surprised and moved her eyes towards Emmett, but I was trying to make amends for my mistakes that had led them to Volterra in the first place, and I did not want her to misunderstand my feelings.

"Let me explain," I said slowly, holding up my hands. "I don't mean that I have any aversion to you as a sister. It's just that…this is not the life I would have chosen for myself. I wish there had been someone there to vote no for me."

I don't think she understood, not really- how could an eighteen year old human girl really understand the concept of immortality?- but she nodded at me without rancour and turned to Emmett.

He grinned at her happily. "Hell, yes! We can find some other way to pick a fight with this Demetri."

I crossed my arms and scowled at him, but he didn't look at me as Bella smiled back at him and moved on to Esme.

"Yes, of course, Bella. I already think of you as part of my family."

Carlisle was the last one, and he did not answer Bella directly at first. Instead he looked at Edward, and gently said his name.

"No," Edward growled, and his smooth face twisted with anger.

"It's the only way that makes sense," Carlisle said. "You've chosen not to live without her, and that doesn't leave me a choice."

Edward stalked out of the room, furious, and there was a crash from the living room as he vented his rage on some hapless object.

"I guess you know my vote," Carlisle sighed.

"That's all I needed to know," Bella spoke quickly. "Thank you. For wanting to keep me. I feel exactly the same way about all of you too." She seemed to be fighting back tears, and I watched, expressionless, as Esme and Alice embraced her.

In the end, my vote had not mattered. I noted the irony of the fact that the person who loved Bella most and the one who liked her least had both voted against her transformation, and rose from the table and pushed out of the room as Bella, Edward and Alice began shouting at each other about the how and when of Bella's transformation. That part of it mattered little to me; now or after graduation or three years from now…either way, Bella was giving up her human life and there was nothing I could possibly to do to make her see how much she was throwing away.

I went up to my room to think, but when I saw Edward and Bella leave and Emmett had not come up I went in search of him. He was not in the house, and only when I went outside to look for him did I hear the cracks of thunder breaking regularly across the mountains. I looked up at the clear, starlit sky and realised that it wasn't thunder.

Emmett was standing on the edge of the baseball field, tossing balls up into the air and then swinging the bat at them furiously. Behind him was a bag of balls, and four broken bats, including the custom made purple one he'd given me for Christmas, lay at his feet. As I watched him he hit another one, sending the ball whistling into the forest as the bat cracked in two. He tossed the pieces down with the others, and picked up the last intact bat and a new ball, all without looking at me or acknowledging me in any way.

"They'll be hearing you all across the valley," I said quietly. "And you're breaking all the bats."

"I don't give a shit," Emmett's voice was flat, and he still didn't look at me. He tossed another ball up, hit it with a crack that echoed across the mountains, and watched it disappear into the trees before he reached for another one.

"What is it?" I asked uncertainly. "Are you okay?" I did not think I had ever seen Emmett like this.

"Oh yeah, I'm great, just fucking wonderful…" He turned to me suddenly, his eyes so full of raw grief that I took a step back.

"What?"

"I have loved you for seventy years and yet you still wish there had been someone to vote no for you?" he shouted at me. "Seventy fucking years Rosalie! I have given you everything I have, everything I am, and it's not enough? You still think that something else would be better? Well fuck you!"

I felt like he had hit me. "No, Emmett, no, it's not like that…"

"Then what is it like?" He was still shouting, and the baseball bat in his hand cracked under the pressure of his grip. "I just can't…I love you Rosa, have always loved you in some crazy fucking way that makes it so there's nothing in this world or beyond that matters more to me than you. From the first time I laid eyes on you you've been my whole damn world and I love you and yet you regret it…"

He turned and viciously hurled the broken baseball bat across the field, where it crashed in to the trees and disappeared. He did not turn back to look at me, and when he spoke again his voice was so soft I could barely hear it. "I gave you my heart Rosalie, I did everything I could to make you happy, but it isn't enough. It's never been enough, and I don't know what else to do."

I could not speak. That I could hurt him, hurt my beloved Emmett like this? Oh, it was unbearable! I felt my eyes burn as he dropped to the ground in a crouch, his head in his hands. I stumbled over to him and knelt at his side, my hand on his back that felt as cold and rigid as marble.

"Not enough for me?" I whispered. "Emmett, you are more than enough for me, you always have been…I don't deserve you and I know you deserve so much better than me. You make me whole Emmett. I don't know how to be, without you…I can't bear that I have hurt you like this…" My voice faltered, and I shut my eyes and pressed my face into his shoulder.

I felt him turn to face me, gentle hands on the side of my face, and then he gave a start. "Fuck Rosalie, you're crying…" He traced a finger under my burning eye and as I stared at him in shock I saw that it was smeared with what looked like blood. "Fucking hell, I didn't even know we could do that."

I hadn't either. I could imagine what I looked like with blood tears smeared across my face, but for once I didn't give my looks another thought. What did it matter what I looked like, if I could not heal this hurt I had inflicted on my beloved so carelessly? And how could I not cry, when the knowledge that I had hurt my Emmett tore through me, leaving a pain worse than transformation, worse than Jane in Volterra, worse than death?

"If I'm crying it's because I hurt you and I can't stand it," I said fiercely. "You are everything to me Emmett, everything." I caught my hair in my fists and tugged on it distractedly. "Everything I said about Bella, and voting no…that had nothing to do with how I feel about you, and me, and what we have together. It's about everything she will miss not being human, everything we don't have and I can't give you because I'm a vampire and not a human woman."

Emmett shook his head. "But if you were still human, if you hadn't died, there would never have been any 'us' Rosa."

"No, I can't accept that Emmett. This, what we have between us, it is bigger than anything…"

"No," Emmett's voice was firm. "Think about it Rosalie. You would have been some rich society bitch in New York and I would have been a farmer or hunter down in Tennessee…do you really think you would have given the time of day to some backwoods gambler and womaniser from Appalachia? Really? Even someone as handsome and godlike as me?" He laughed shakily at his own joke. "Not a chance. It's only because of Carlisle, because of this whole vampire deal that there is any 'us' at all…and fucking hell I love it Rosa, because I love you. I don't even want to waste my time imagining a world without you in it, because I know it would suck."

"I am so, so sorry I hurt you with what I said." I put my hands on his shoulders and pushed him until he was sitting in the grass, and then I straddled his thighs to sit facing him, my body touching his lightly all along my torso, my hands still on his shoulders, my neck arched to look up at him. "I would go to Volterra myself and ask them to destroy me a thousand times before I would see you sad Emmett, you must believe that."

He looked into my eyes and nodded, and then crushed his mouth against mine. Nothing gentle this time, just fierce lust and claiming what was his. "This," he said hoarsely a minute later. "This I believe in, Rosa. This reality of you and me and what we are when we're together. I'm not…not good with words. You know that by now- all that romance and poetry and soul deep shit that Edward goes on about, it's not me."

I couldn't help my sudden, surprised laugh, and Emmett grinned at me and I knew we would be okay together.

"Let me finish! I'm trying here…" he chuckled, and kissed me again. "I'm not like that Rosa, but you know what I feel for you. You know. I love you. I love you for being smart and beautiful and for being a badass bitch who fixes my car and makes me laugh and fucks me fifty ways to Sunday. I love you for saving my life by making Carlisle give me a new life, and I love that you've stayed by my side despite the fact that I'm just some boneheaded vampire you happened to come across in the woods. I love you when you're happy and I love you when you're mad and I love you when you're being a bitch and when you're scared and when you've got me by the balls and when you're being sweet and when you're fighting…hell baby doll, I can't even tell you all the ways I love you. And it gutted me to think that I don't make you as happy as you make me."

I pressed my lips to his for a long moment. "I'm not that great with words either," I looked into his eyes and slid my hands down his belly, going low enough to make him gasp, and then I laughed again and bit teasingly at his lower lip. "The truth of it is, simply, that there wasn't anyone to vote no for me. So here I am, and here you are, and I promise you Emmett, right now I don't want anything different."

I twined my arms around further around him and grabbed his hair to make him look at me. "We've had seventy years Emmett and it's been wonderful, but it's only a moment in the fullness of forever. So there wasn't anyone to vote no for me, and maybe I wouldn't have chosen this if I'd had a choice, but it is what it is and damned if I will lose you, the one thing that makes it all worthwhile for me. So I'm going to want you always, need you always, but most of all love you always Emmett."

He nodded at me. "I've said it to you before, I think…but I don't buy into all that fairy tale romance and star crossed lover bullshit. What I believe in is what we have…you and me, and what we are when we're together. Two people who were lucky enough to find each other and build something together and make it work. Love that makes us better than what we might have been individually. Love that makes us happy Rosa girl. You're my world, not because I can't live without you in it, but because you make it better when you are there. And that's more than enough for me."

It felt weird to write Bella in this section, even though most of her dialogue was just a straight lift from the book. I never write Bella!

So that's it, the end of New Moon according to Rosalie. Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed the writing, and a big thanks to those who took the time to review- I appreciate it a lot.

All characters, much of the storyline and dialogue belongs to Stephenie Meyer.