A/N: I feel like a jerk for not updating in so long. More than a jerk, but I can't say those words here. I'm sorry it's been so long. I'm not going to give you any excuses. I'm just sorry.
Death. It is always waiting, somewhere in the background. Everyone knows it's there, and they know sooner or later it will come for them or their loved ones...Yet it never fails to surprise them, when they learn they are about to die, or that they only have so long with their loved ones. Death sneaks obviously towards them, and they manage still to close their eyes, cover their ears, and say "I can't hear you!" right up until the very moment that he stands before you, waiting.
Russetfur stared blankly at the back wall of the hollow. Falconkit's blood had dribbled grotesque patterns, and her ear was smashed and deformed, but neither of these things invited the queen's shock. No, it was the shallow breaths the kit took every moment. That Falconkit was alive was too beyond Russetfur that she could barely manage to step shakily towards her and began grooming the kit's blood-soaked fur. Motherly instinct had now completely taken over, and she sat down and licked the black fur, drawing the kit close to keep her warm.
Memories flooded through her as she licked this kit. She remembered being a kit herself only vaguely; the comfort of the nursery, her own mother grooming her and fawning over Cedarheart, but mostly her impatience. She couldn't wait to be an apprentice, and when she was finally granted that opportunity, she drove Hollyflower half mad. She was always ready to do battle training. She was even excited to go hunting for the Clan, though she was never a great hunter. But the battle training! She was so full of fire and always looking for an opportunity to get into a real battle, where she could put all her training to real use.
There was, of course, the incident of the fox stalking Tigerclaw when he was a kit, but that was before she knew how to fight at all. Pure, instinctual fighting happened there, but she craved more knowledge. Her next fight outside of battle training didn't really count, either; Blackfoot had goaded her into fighting him, and that was quickly broken up. Not too soon after that, however, she got her fight.
While hunting, she ended up combining the two main duties of an apprentice in one; she fought and killed an owl to bring back to the Clan as fresh-kill. Owlflight had actually been named after that incident. She had taken pride in that from then on. But her first Clan skirmish.. That was terrifying. Whitewater lost her eye in that fight, and though Russetfur was made a warrior for her bravery in that battle, she would never look back on it proudly, for it was but a scar on her memory.
Flash forward to training Nightpelt and Whitewater in conjunction... They got so jealous of each other, she found out later. Of course, now Nightstar is leader of the Clan and hates her for supporting Brokenstar. But that doesn't mean she's forgotten all the times they spent together when he didn't hate her. They were close friends, more than mentor and apprentice.
Until he banished her. He didn't just banish an "unfaithful" warrior, though. He banished his ex-mentor, while she was very pregnant. Russetfur's indignancy at this sparked life into her. Refusing to let any thoughts of Tigerclaw into her head, she decided to go into the ShadowClan camp, have another queen care for Falconkit, and explain to Nightstar why he was wrong for banishing her. She had to go back to ShadowClan. It was her whole life, now that her kits were gone.
The grief still made her ache and want to cry and never get to her paws, but she shoved it away. She could deal with it later. Russetfur picked up Falconkit very gently by the scruff, but the kit cried out in pain so the warrior placed her in between her shoulder blades before slinking out onto a near branch. Widening her jaws, she picked the kit up around the middle, leaving her damaged neck from further injury.
Clawing down the tree precariously, she started walking to the ShadowClan camp through the heavy fog. Russetfur glanced back only once, swallowing her feelings and shoving them away for later consult.
Russetfur crouched behind a shrub, out of breath. She was just outside of ShadowClan camp, the walk there physically tiring for her, as she was still out of shape from the pregancy. Falconkit's wounds had started bleeding again, and she still hadn't woken up. I need a medicine cat, quick! Russetfur thought, and steeled herself. She stood up on her shaking legs, and padded into the camp.
There were only three cats not in their dens or wandering about. The first she came across was Vinesplash, guarding the camp. "R-Russetfur?" the younger warrior stammered. "What are you doing here? You were banished! I-I'll have to drive you off if you don't leave!" she blustered uncertainly.
"Vinesplash." Russetfur warned after putting Falconkit gently on the ground. "This kit needs to see Runningnose right now, before she dies. And I.. I need to speak with Nightstar. If you do not let me pass, Falconkit will die and I will have to fight you. Don't make me do that." She cautioned, an edge to her tone. Vinesplash looked at her a moment longer, then stepped aside.
The first thing Russetfur noticed about ShadowClan camp was the scent. The whole camp reeked of sickness and death. Wrinkling her nose, she padded carefully to the medicine den, stumbling once over an old prey bone. Blinking through the mist, she smelled that the sick smell was emanating from the den itself. Just outside, she set the kit down again and called, "Runningnose!"
The medicine cat's gray and white face poked out of the den. His irritated scowl turned into shock when he saw who it was. "Russetfur! What in StarClan -" the ginger she-cat waved her tail for silence.
"Falconkit is injured. Badly. I need you to help her. " they both looked down at the kit, then at each other. Runningnose's eyes held uncertainty. "What? She wasn't banished, I know you can help her!" The she-cat cried.
He blinked. "Yes, I can... But I don't know if she will make it. And even if she does... She could contract the sickness. I don't think she should be here. Cats have died since you were banished, Russetfur!"She stepped back in surprise, eyes widening in question.
"Brightflower and Brownpaw are dead. Greenfang is soon to join them, and Ashfur, too."He said sadly, clawing at the dirt. "There's nothing I can do to help them, Russetfur! I can't find anything, no herb or remedy that will even ease their passage, let alone cure it. Get away from here, far away. And take that kit with you!"
Russetfur replied shakily, "Runningnose... If I take her, she'll die. I don't know how to help her!"
"I'll tell you; First, keep her from losing anymore blood with cobwebs, then you'll have to get Willow Bark from twolegplace, and make a poultice of it with horsetail to put on the wounds. Cover it with cobwebs again and see if she pulls through. Now, get out of this camp and wash yourself off in a stream after." He explained in a rush.
Russetfur nodded and turned to go, but he stopped her. "Wait! One more thing... I want you to take a few others with you. Thornkit's already infected, but Snowkit still has a chance. Take him with you, as well as Poppyfeather and her kits. Since she was a kittypet, she is protected by Twoleg medicine. Her kits are still in danger, though. Now, go!" The she-cat dipped her head in determination.
Russetfur picked up Falconkit in her jaws and padded swiftly to the nursery. Poppyfeather's eyes grew wide as she entered. before she could say anything, the red-furred warrior cut her off. "Yes, it's me. I know you probably don't want to trust me right now, but Runningnose has ordered me to take you, your kits, and Snowkit away from here, so you don't get the sickness. Will you please come with me now? We have to leave immediately."
The tortoiseshell absorbed the information well. "Yes, yes of course. Hazelkit, Grasskit, come along. I think Snowkit is in the apprentice's den. Nightstar changed his name back, but he likes to pretend he's still an apprentice." A tiny smile appeared on the queen's face. "I'll get him."
"Okay. Hazelkit, Grasskit, follow me." russetfur instructed leading them out of the den and over to Vinesplash to explain the situation. "I know what this looks like." she said as Vinesplash stood up threateningly. "But Runningnose has told me to leave and take them with me, along with Poppyfeather and Snowkit, so they don't get sick."
The black and white she cat's long tail waved back and forth agitatedly. "I.. I believe you. I know you wouldn't lie to me, Russetfur. A-And... If this is the l-last time I see y-you... I j-just want you to know that I n-never thought you were a traitor and I w-wish only the best for you."
"Thank you, Vinesplash." She replied sincerely. Poppyfeather, with Snowkit trailing behind, walked up behind her. "Goodbye."
The six of them left camp, Poppyfeather taking a turn at carrying Falconkit. They paused a little outside of camp, when Snowkit asked, "Where are we going, Russetfur?" which made her stop and think.
She couldn't go to Charlie's, with all these cats with her... "Russetfur, where are your kits?" Hazelkit asked. "I want to play with them!"
"They're in StarClan, Hazelkit." she answered shortly, the words torturous. She also couldn't go back to the Burnt Sycamore, because of that. She needed a place that was safe, dry, and warm. A place close by, so they could return to ShadowClan at a moment's notice, but also a place far enough for them not to get the sickness. Russetfur wanted to stay in the territory, as it was the only place she knew how to hunt, but if she was caught by Nightstar or the more aggressive members of the Clan, they could drive her off and leave Poppyfeather and all the kits in a tough spot. She looked up at the darkening sky, and noticed that there was only a tiny sliver of moon left, which gave her an idea.
She got to her paws and announced, "We are going to the tunnel under the Thunderpath, for now. It's almost a full moon before the next Gathering, so we'll be safe there, for now. Let's go." The entourage made only one stop, which was to gather some cobwebs from a broken off stump and bind Falconkit's wounds them. Once they got to the tunnel, Poppyfeather asked, "Russetfur, if I take care of the kits here, will you get some stuff to build a nest? It's not too comfortable right now..." she stated, glancing at the hard, damp stone floor with only a few sodden stems for nest materials.
"Sure..." Russetfur said after a moment, though she was tired from the journey. She knew she couldn't expect an ex-kittypet and a bunch of kits to tough it out in such conditions. So she left the den, back out into the cold, misty air. The late leaf-bare left little vegetation for this, but she was able to find a bit of moss off of a rock, as well as some less soft but dry grass and feathers from what was once a bird's nest. She carried her load uneasily back to the tunnel, where Snowkit was bragging about his hunting skills to Hazelkit and Grasskit.
Finding the driest spot in the tunnel, she made a large nest for Poppyfeather and the kits, leaving a bit of dry grass for herself. "I think we should get some rest, okay?" she urged, and though it was barely sundown, the kits did not argue. All of them were tired from the journey, and Falconkit had still not reached full consciousness.
"Russetfur, are you really alright with just that clump of dead grass?" Poppyfeather asked worriedly as the kits curled up by her stomach.
The warrior dipped her head. "I'm fine." Snowkit approached them awkwardly, and seeing that there wasn't much room in the real nest for him, he padded boldly over to Russetfur.
"I'll keep you warm, then!" he smiled, and cuddled up by her stomach. This simple action, so familiar, made tears spring to Russetfur's eyes in memory of her own kits, who would never lie at her belly again. She turned her head away to hide her feelings from the others, but laid her fluffy tail on the white tom.
