Chapter 4, finally. I hope you like it.

Thanks to Kiriny13.


Chapter 4

EPOV

I was nervous. I was really nervous. More nervous than I ever remember being. Why the hell was I so nervous?! Bella and I had gone out to dinner several times before, after all. This was nothing new.

Then again, maybe my nervousness had something to do with the fact I planned to tell Bella I was hopelessly in love with her tonight. That is, if I actually managed to pack the necessary courage for the task.

I sighed loudly.

What was happening to me? Why was I such a coward when it came to this? Bella was my best friend, she wouldn't treat me badly… but what if she didn't feel the same way for me? This would surely make things between us awkward and I wouldn't be able to look at her without feeling like the most stupid person in the world for putting an end to whatever it is we had.

Oh, I was a mess… I needed to control myself.

I took a deep breath, forcing myself to calm down and then knocked on her door, looking down at myself for one last time to make sure I looked okay.

Soon enough, Bella opened the door for me and I had to control myself in order to not drool at the sight of her or simply jump her right there and there. She was beautiful.

She had a midnight blue dress on that hugged her body perfectly, accentuating the curve of her hips and the swell of her breasts. She was trying to kill me, I was sure.

"Hi." I swallowed hard and smiled at her.

"Hello. You look beautiful, Bella." She smiled up at me and reached for my hand, inviting me in.

"Thank you. You don't look too bad yourself." She let her eyes trail down my body and then smiled again. "Not bad at all, actually."

I chuckled at her and shook my head as she led me to the living room where I sat on the arm of the couch and took her hand in mind, pulling her towards to me. I needed to have her close to me.

She moved so she was standing between my legs and rested her hands on my shoulders.

She not only looked beautiful, but she smelled amazing as well. I didn't stand a chance when it came to resisting her.

"Now, tell me, Ms. Swan, is this all for me?" I leaned a little back so I could take her in, my eyes scanning her body and making her blush.

"Well, I think we can say it is." And that's what I wanted to hear.

"Good answer!" She shrugged and lightly ran her fingers through my hair; tousling it even more and making me lean in to place a kiss on the tip of her nose. "Are you ready to go, love?"

"Yes, just let me get my coat." I got it for her and then reached for her hand as we walked out of her apartment to the car.

I took her to a cozy, little restaurant Alice had told me about and arranged for the waitress to sit us far from all the commotion.

As we ordered, I couldn't completely take my eyes off of Bella. I was quite fascinated by the way her hair fell down her shoulders or by the way she bit her lower lip while scanning the menu in front of her. I wanted to suck that lip into my mouth and bite it for her.

I was vaguely aware of the waitress talking to me and smiling, but I couldn't quite concentrate on her. Who could blame me when I had Bella sitting across from me?

When the waitress left with our orders, Bella giggled and shook her head.

"That was unbelievable. She was all over you. For all she knows, we're together!" I raised an eyebrow at Bella's statement not really knowing what she meant.

"What? Who?" She raised her own eyebrow and rolled her eyes.

"The waitress, Edward. She's all over you."

"No, she's not."

"Yes, she is." I shook my head. "Come on, Edward. You can't possibly tell me you didn't notice how she was flirting with you."

I furrowed my brow and looked at the direction the waitress had walked before looking back at Bella. I really hadn't noticed the waitress at all.

"I didn't…" Bella laughed and shook her head.

"How is that possible, Edward? She wasn't being necessarily discreet." I just shrugged and smiled up at her.

This seemed like the perfect moment to ease the subject of what I felt into the conversation.

"I was busy looking at you and…" She didn't let me go on.

"And hopefully thinking about all the wicked things you'll do to me later tonight. Or that you'll let me do to you." I couldn't help but to chuckle because, let's face it, there were a lot of wicked things I would like to do to her if she let me and I was sure she would. She could be a little vixen when she wanted to, after all.

Before the thoughts of Bella spread beneath me while I kissed every inch of her body could enter my mind too clearly, I shook my head and went on.

"That too, but the main thought on my head was that you're beautiful." Much to my delight, Bella blushed furiously and ducked her head down, making me chuckle.

"You blushed. After all this time, you still blush." If possible, Bella blushed even more and I reached across the table to cover her small hand with mine. "I absolutely love your blush."

She looked up at me through her long eyelashes and smiled shyly.

"Thank you, Edward."

"There's something I need to tell you, Bella."

"I'm listening." I opened my mouth to tell her what I had wanted to for a long time but suddenly, I just couldn't. It was as if the words had gotten caught in my throat. What if I messed up everything between us with those three little words and she would never want to look at me again? I couldn't live with that.

So I opted to tell her what I could, staying as close to the truth as possible.

"I really like you, Bella." She smiled widely at me and squeezed my hand back.

"I know. I really like you, too." I smiled as well, even though I knew she didn't fully understand me.

"Okay, I'd like you to keep that in mind, then." She just rolled her eyes as I went on. "You know, I was thinking… would you be okay with seeing me in public?"

"What do you mean?"

"I thought we could go out together sometimes. We could be in public together."

"You mean like this?" She gestured between us and I nodded. "We always go out together, Edward."

"Yes, yes I know. I was thinking we could be like this, but a little more intimate." She raised an eyebrow as I prayed I could make myself understood.

"More intimate?" I looked straight at her and nodded.

"Yes, more intimate." Her mouth formed an 'o' as realization hit her and she stood still for several seconds, probably thinking it through.

"And how intimate are we talking about here?" Deciding I could show her instead of telling her, I leaned in over the table and pulled her down for a soft kiss. My lips were soft on hers, but it still made a shiver run down my spine.

When I pulled back, she smiled shyly, making me smile back at her.

"That intimate."

"I would like that." I had to resist the urge to jump up and crash her in my arms right there and then. A mile long smile did appear on my face, though.

So I couldn't seem to be able to tell her I loved her just yet, but at least this was a start. A very good start.

--

We ate dinner in comfortable silence, breaking it every now and then with a comment that made the other laugh. I also made sure to take Bella's hand as often as possible, caressing it and intertwining our fingers together.

Once we were done, I paid for the bill and we headed outside.

"So, Mr. Cullen, do you have something else in mind for today?" I walked closer to her and nuzzled her cheek, feeling her shudder, before shrugging.

"Not exactly. I did notice a fair when we were heading here, though. Do you want to go check it out?" She furrowed her brow, finding my suggestion a little unusual.

"The fair?"

"Yes, the fair."

"You want to go to the fair?" She still seemed unsure.

"Yes. It could be fun. How long has it been since you've last gone to a fair?" She seemed to think about it for a few seconds before answering me.

"About ten years, I guess."

"Then there you go. Tonight we'll relive our childhood." She giggled and then shook her head smiling.

"I'm so not dressed for the fair!" She gasped at her own words and then giggled. "That was a very Alice-like comment, wasn't it?"

"It definitely was. I think my sister is finally getting to you."

"I think she is! Alright, Mr. Cullen, let's go to the fair. You better win one of those giant teddy bears for me, though. I always wanted one of those." I laughed and took her hand in mine as we started walking to the fair.

I would make sure I won her one of those damn stuffed animals.

--

I had to confess, it took a while to actually win the teddy bear she wanted but I eventually did it and it was totally worth it just to see the wide smile on her face. It turns out I had a better aim that I thought.

We rode a few attractions, including the rollercoaster where Bella all but screamed bloody murder, played some games and Bella ate more cotton candy than I thought humanly possible before it started to get a little too late. We couldn't leave without taking a ride on the Ferris wheel, though. It was tradition, after all.

I grabbed her hand once more and pulled her to the Ferris wheel, making her laugh. I absolutely loved that sound.

As we rode the Ferris wheel, I threw my arm over Bella's shoulder, pulling her closer to me and she snuggled against my side, resting her head on my shoulder.

I took the opportunity to bury my face in her hair, allowing the wonderful strawberry scent to take over me as she looked at the city displayed in front of us.

I wish I could always have her like this, in my arms, making me feel both comfortable and happy. I still had so much to tell her, so much to confess, but I was comforted by the fact we had made progress.

We usually went out together every now and then, but we were never this physical—we never got so close to each other. We talked and laughed, but I had never held her hand, hugged and kissed her like I had done tonight.

It was definitely progress.

She was the first one to break our silence with a sigh.

"This is great, Edward."

"It is. And you didn't even want to come!"

"I never said I didn't want to come. I just thought it was an unusual idea. I'm glad we came, though. I mean, I even got my big ass teddy bear!" I smiled and kissed the top of her head.

"I'm glad we came, too." I felt her nod and then she moved a little so she was looking up at me with a smile on her face. I just couldn't resist the urge to lean in and kiss her.

I placed my hand on her chin and very lightly pressed our lips together, kissing her softly as she ran her hand up my chest to my neck, playing with my hair.

The kiss began soft, but we quickly deepened it as Bella moaned into my mouth. I traced her lower lip with my tongue, begging for entrance to her mouth, which she granted me with.

Our tongues immediately locked in a battle none of us was truly interested in winning and I quickly found myself groaning deeply as my hand moved to Bella's thigh, caressing it.

It was one of those moments when I didn't care where we were, when time and everything else seemed to stand still and all I could acknowledge was the feel of Bella's lips on mine and her soft body pressed against my own. I practically lived for these moments.

When we pulled back for air, I nuzzled her nose with my own, making her smile and then leaned in to take her now swollen lips between mine again.

She was intoxicating. I couldn't get enough of her smell, the feel of her soft skin, her kisses…

I spent the rest of the ride and the way back to her apartment kissing her.

--

Bella opened the door to her apartment and then turned around to look at me, smiling.

"Thanks for tonight, Edward. I really enjoyed it." I smiled back at her and tucked a fallen strand of her hair back behind her ear.

"Me too. It was a great night." Even thought I hadn't found a way of telling her exactly how I felt about her, it had been a great night and I think that, at least on some level, she understood what I was trying to tell her during dinner.

Now we would just have to wait and see how our relationship developed.

"Do you want to come in?" I really did, but I wasn't so sure.

"Bella, if I come in we both know what will happen."

"Yes, and is that bad?" On the contrary. It was amazingly good.

"No, not at all. That's very, very good, but…" She stepped closer to me and wrapped her arms around me so she could pull me down for a kiss.

"You know, just because we decided we would be a little more intimate in public doesn't mean we can't still be completely intimate when we're alone…" I chuckled at her reasoning. I could never deny her anything and I wanted her so much, that I couldn't help but follow her inside.


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