Nursery Rhyme: The Old Lady Who Lived In a Shoe

Rated: K+

Cast: The Strawhats

A/N: So for nursery rhyme format, I wrote the lines from the poem in a slant, so my story will hopefully make more sense. Feel free to let me know if it seems weird and should be formatted differently. ON WITH THE SHOW!


Once upon a time

There was an old lady who lived in a shoe…

"What are you talking about? I'm only eighteen!" Nami roared at the author.

She had so many children, she didn't know what to do…

"Namiiii… I'm hungry…." Luffy wined.

"No way am I that witch's child," Zoro protested.

"Mother Nami-swaaan!" Sanji swooned.

"Sanji, it's a bit awkward that you're in love with your mom," Usopp commented.

"Robin-chwan!" Sanji swooned again.

"Eww, that's Incest bro!" Franky stuck his tongue out in disgust.

"Excuse me Nami-san, may I see your panties?" Brook asked.

"Skeleton-san, I believe you are trying our mother's patience." Robin warned him.

"Why am I the only reindeer child?" Chopper wondered.

"Shut up!" Nami roared at them. Each child instantly fell silent.

She gave them broth without any bread…

"Nami can't I have some bread?" Luffy wined again, his soup bowl already empty.

"No, you all lost your bread privileges!" Nami answered angrily. The children protested (except Robin and Sanji) and begged for more food.

"Shut up!" Nami screamed again.

Then whipped them all soundly and put them to bed…

"Ah, Nami-san's beatings of love…" Sanji fantasized while he lay in bed.

"How come Robin was the only one who didn't get whipped?" Usopp complained, resting on his stomach so the open gashes on his back wouldn't hurt as bad.

"Who cares, it's not like we don't get regular beatings from her anyways," Zoro grumbled, blood pooling in his bed.

"I say we get adopted by a new mom," Franky pouted.

The end…


A/N: Nami + whip = Win. And If anyone has any requests, I will happily accept them! Reviews will be greatly appreciated!