(A/N: this format is the Marauders. Just so we're all clear on this.)
Albus, you'll never guess what I got today.
Was it a ball of catnip?
Ha ha, asshole.
Thank you. Was it an order of Merlin Award?
From the Ministry we have now, I would kill myself before I accepted anything like that.
Fair enough. I know! You got a lifetime's supply of lemon drops you're about to give to me.
Nope. Has anyone ever told you you have a very narrow perspective on the good things in life?
No, they haven't. What'd you get?
I got a…
What?
Certificate of Awesomeness!
Oh.
'Oh'? What kinda response is that?
Um…
Shit. What'd you do?
Um… I gonna start running now.
JUST TELL ME!
I gave it to the Marauders.
You didn't.
I did.
THE MARAUDERS? Of all people, you gave it to the Marauders. Oh sweet Merlin.
Um… should I keep running?
It wouldn't be your worst idea. What did they do to it?
Er…
Tell. Me. Now.
Do I have to?
If you want to keep your testicles where they are you will.
They could do with a bit of readjusting.
…
What?
I can't believe you just said that.
What? It's true.
EW! Ewewewewewewewewewewewewewewew. *fingers in ears; head to desk*
I'm not sure what they did to it, actually.
We charmed it so we can see whatever you're doing! Right now, it's hanging in Minnie's classroom and she's banging her head on her desk shouting "WHY?"
No. It can't be.
I think it might be.
(Minnie and Dumbles) THE DEMON CHILDREN!
Personally, we prefer 'Troublemaking Erumpents of Awesomeness' or just 'Marauders', but 'Demon Children' works too.
*head to desk*
(Dumbles and T.E.A.) Ouch.
Don't do that Minnie.
The next person that calls me Minnie gets their ass(es) kicked into last millennium.
(Dumbles and T.E.A.) MINNIE!
AARGH!
...
…
You guys still there?
Here.
…
Minnie, come back.
I'm coming old man. Kiss your beard and candy good-bye.
NOOO…
We need to do this more often.
...
…
Uh-oh. Where's Minnie?
Children?
That is us. Yes?
Run. Now. By the way, I will be filling in for Professor Dumbledore as his is currently… ahem 'indisposed'.
First: EW! Second: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRGH!
